#thegoddamnbatstiles

[derekstilinski]

Stiles doesn't fully want to admit it, but he's getting tired. Tired physically, tired emotionally. It's like Derek doesn't want to get better.

"I want you to leave." Derek mumbles.

"And come back tomorrow?"

Derek's silent and something about that just makes Stiles angry. He stands and glares at his back, "And come back tomorrow?"

Derek shrugs.

Stiles sets his jaw, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" Still silent, Derek puts another shirt into the drawer, looking tense. Stiles clenches his fists, "What do you want from me, huh? Do you even want to get better? I'm trying to help you!"

[derekstilinski]

Stiles grabs his wrist, pulls him close. Derek starts to refuse, like anyone crying who wants to keep it to themselves would, but Stiles isn't having it.

"It's okay. Come on, come here." Stiles spreads his legs for him, wraps himself around him when he's close enough. He lets Derek hide his face in the crook of his neck and he strokes a hand through his hair soothingly, "It's fine, Derek. Just let it out. Please, it'll be okay."

It worries and pleases Stiles when he gives in.

[derekstilinski]

Sometimes Derek looks utterly shattered. Just so done with the entire world and the people in it. Sometimes... It's like the only reason he doesn't kill himself is because he thinks he deserves the pain. And that hurts Stiles so much, that he wants to strive to prove that he deserves not only to be alive, but to be happy without guilt. He can't do it very well himself, but he's always trying to make people around him feel better.

Stiles glances to Derek's lips. Kisses are nice. Kisses make things better, right? He hopes so. He licks his lips and steps a little closer. He wants to kiss him. He wants to kiss Derek. It'll be nice.

[derekstilinski]

He runs a hand through Derek's hair, "I was talking you about actually going into a store, leather jacket and sour-faced, buying a pretty box of hot chocolate."

"I'm not sour-faced all the time." Derek mumbles into his shoulder, arms still limply at his sides.

"Maybe if you smiled for me, I'd think differently," He kisses the Alpha's temple, has that urge to kiss him on the mouth again. He pulls away and cups Derek's face in his hands, thumbs swiping under his red rimmed eyes, "...But no, you don't look sour-faced all the time."

[derekstilinski]

Derek touches Stiles' knuckles, the ones on the hand holding the counter, all shaky. He moves his fingertips over them slowly and Stiles is sure he can not only hear but now feel how hard his blood is pumping. Derek clears his throat, and all of his - not really his, Derek could argue if it was voice - Betas look up at him.

[derekstilinski]

It's pitch black and he has to feel his way to the bed. He comes into contact with Derek's bare thigh and stills for about half a second before he's curling his hand around, walking on his knees on the mattress. Hands find their way to his jeans and undo them, help him gladly get out of them. He sheds his own shirt and climbs on top of Derek, touching along his skin.

He realizes that Derek's only in his underwear. He feels the fabric against his thighs as he parts them wider, Derek's hands slipping under his boxer-briefs to cup his ass.

"You did good tonight." He says in a whisper, letting his hands tangle in the wolf's hair.

"Mm." He gets just a noise to confirm Derek heard him. Stiles wants to kiss him again, just tilt down and press their lips together. He wants to, and he's thinking about doing it.

[derekstilinski]

"I scored two goals in practice today." Isaac informs softly from the couch, like he's testing if Derek will acknowledge him and is scared that he might not again.

Derek nods, starting to eat again. Stiles can practically see Isaac's ear perk up, back straightening and eyes getting rounder.

"I saw that, it was good. I pulled Allison's hair today," Erica shoots a look that would be apologetic if it weren't for her smirk to Scott, "She growled at me. It was fun."

"I'm getting a B plus in Calculus." Boyd offers, glancing up to Derek. The Alpha chews his food thoughtfully, even if looking a bit zoned out, then nods again.

"They're going to school." Derek says to Stiles, and Stiles nods eagerly. "Good."

Everyone gets a little giddy.

[derekstilinski]

Stiles clears his throat, "So, anything interesting anyone would like to talk about?" Scott shovels in another spoonful of pasta and Boyd turns more toward Erica. Oh, alright. Dicks. "I had a wonderful day. I was told I'm getting an A in AP English, which is awesome. A for awesome..."

He's making up for silence again, and he doesn't like it.