#thehappinesseffect

[thehappinesseffectbr-blog]

C O N C L U S I O N

The Happiness Effect by Donna Freitas was a real eye-opener for me. It has changed my perspective on social media platforms and has allowed me to view content in a different way.

As mentioned in my first post, I am a social media addict. Becoming so involved in counting likes and followers, I lost my original motive as to why I was posting content. Being so caught up in the online world, I feel as though I lost a little bit of my happiness. This book has helped me take a step back and re-evaluate my social media presence.

Since finishing the book, I have dedicated more ‘offline’ time to myself. Although I still use social media on a daily basis for work and school purposes, I have made a conscious effort to avoid mindless scrolling and obsessive refreshes on my feed. I disconnect for the first hour in the morning and the last hour before the end of the day.

Jealously doesn’t look good on anyone, nor does it help with your overall satisfaction and happiness in life. The Happiness Effect has shown me that I am not alone when it comes to insecurities about myself. Social media has created an incredible pressure to appear perfect and seek constant validation from friends, family, classmates, and strangers that I am liked. It has personally affected my views on my body, appearance, and relationships, which has taken a shot at my self-confidence. Freitas has given me the push to acknowledge the power of the internet and rise above it all.

I have decided to share more content that sparks true happiness in my life, and spend less time on taking ‘the perfect selfie.’

In conclusion, social media will always hold a special place in my heart. I have and will always continuously seek inspiration to create and inspire, and with the help of technology, it has allowed me to do so in more ways than I could have ever imagined. For that, I am incredibly #thankful.

[thehappinesseffectbr-blog]

T H E  S E L F I E  G E N E R A T I O N

“Fifty years later, when people look upon this generation and this time period, I’m sure they’re going to dub it “the Selfie Generation.”

The Happiness Effect discusses some of the most noteworthy views of the selfie culture from the eyes of college students. In this chapter, they discuss how they believe that their generation is completely self-obsessed, posting pictures or videos about every single little thing they are doing as if they are trying to prove something to the world and their peers.

Almost half of the students that Freidas interviewed were anti-selfie. Students argued that selfies were part of the reason young people spend their time comparing themselves to other, creating low self-esteem and body image issues.

“We believe the world revolves around us and everyone cares about what we are doing. But the reality is, everyone, is too busy caring about themselves to remember what someone posts for more than an hour or two.”

This chapter also discusses how young people feel as though social media is a woman’s world. Almost all the students agreed that men don’t post as many selfies. One student notes that they believe that if selfies were posted more by guys than girls, we wouldn’t look down on selfie-takers so much. Many students mention the infamous ‘duck face’  and how the expression leads to negative impressions on girls.

“If you see a girl posting with the ‘duck face,’ you’re like, ‘Oh, this girl is very vapid. She’s not very intelligent. She’s superficial. She’s very into how she looks and her clothes.’ And she may be an amazing, great individual, very bubbly, very talkative person. You’re not going to get that from the selfie you just saw. You’re just going to see her as being whatever society has attached to the ‘duck face.’”

I could spend hours discussing “the Selfie Generation.” I do not believe that a selfie is purely destructive, however, most selfies stem from the undying need to receive constant validation from others. There is an insane amount of pressure to fit in, appear flawless, and constantly happy, not only within colleges but through all people active on social media.

“I think that the root of documenting experiences is insecurity. We feel this inherent need to post things that will validate our lives. It’s become this competition of who can go to the coolest places, who can find the coolest things, who can take the best picture of themselves, and it just becomes this very selfish, self-centered culture that I think is taking our society in a wrong direction.”  

[thehappinesseffectbr-blog]

F A C E B O O K  O F F I C I A L

“I don’t want [people] to feel like that is who I am, it defines my whole person. So when you see that [so and so] is in a relationship with some guy, then it defines him...Yes, gay pride...gay, gay, gay, gay all the time. But most people think [being gay] may have a negative influence on work and stuff like that. So I just keep my personal life personal.” 

In The Happiness Effect, Freidas sits down with a college student to discuss his feelings toward posting your sexual orientation on social media. Eddison ends up mentioning that he is gay and would never reveal his sexual orientation on a social platform in fear that it would persuade people’s opinions about him, complicate his family relationships, and affect his success rate in possibly landing a job.

It saddens me to think that there are more young people out there that share the same fears as Eddison when it comes to this subject. 

Although I am heterosexual, I understand Eddison’s point of view on the topic. Unfortunately, the world we live in is made up with an abundance of opinions that we may not always agree with. Posting openly about romantic relationships, gay or heterosexual, can create unwanted attention that people may not ask for or desire. However, with that said, I strongly believe that your sexual orientation should not matter.  Although I do not feel like this would affect my potential career opportunities or family relationships, I have made a decision to not post any information regarding my romantic relationships on social media. I believe that that this type of information should only truly be shared with the people that you are closest to and not the entire world.

Grab a copy of The Happiness Effect here.

[thehappinesseffectbr-blog]

T H E  H A P P I N E S S  E F F E C T

I have to admit, I spend about 70% of my waking hours on social media. Posting, scrolling, commenting, blogging, editing, observing. Had you of asked me two months ago if I thought I was addicted to social media, I would’ve shouted out a big, fat, N-O. Ask me again, after reading The Happiness Effect by Donna Freitas, and I would be the first one to raise my white flag high up in the air.

I am a social media addict.

It was not until I picked this book up, that I acknowledged and understood just how big of a role this new found technology plays in our lives and contributes to our happiness, stress, anxiety and overall satisfaction with life.

The Happiness Effect by Donna Freitas is an incredible, eye-opening book that discusses the elephant in the room: Social media and its effect on a generation to appear perfect at any cost. Freitas conducts over 200 interviews and surveys with students across thirteen college campuses all around North America. This novel discusses what young people are really searching for - true happiness. How do they measure this happiness, you ask? Through the validation of friends, family, peers, and strangers through multiple online platforms. Young people set out to achieve unrealistic goals and set impossible standards to perfect their personal brand image at absolutely any cost.

Coming from someone who has not been able to sit down and finish a book since she purchased her first cell phone (age is just a number, my friends),  I was unable to put this one down. I swapped my daily Instagram and Facebook scrolling during my morning commute into the city for some insights on how technology is shaping an entire generation.

This book is for everyone that has felt a slight bit of excitement (or disappointment) at the number of likes they received on a social media post. It is the perfect read for anyone who has scrolled through their peers' social profiles, filtered a photo, carefully crafted the perfect caption, checked-in on Facebook, or posted something in hopes for a specific person to view it. For anyone that has taken a selfie, kept track of their followers, or spent more time capturing a moment than experiencing it. For anyone who #doesitforthegram, this book is for you.

Grab a copy here

[latenighthealthradioshow]

The Positive Benefits of Negative Ions (Part 1)- Dr. Earl Mindell 4-29-16

[latenighthealthradioshow]

The Positive Benefits of Negative Ions (Part 2)- Dr. Earl Mindell 4-29-16

[selfwhisperermentoring]

Check out my stream on #meerkat #thehappinessfactor #webinar

[krlrde]

"Happiness can be found in Him alone." Laking community ako. I have been a member of a youth group since 2004. It was a co-curricular activity outside high school that i grew with. My life was never the same. There was a turning point in my service come 2007. A decision has been made and again, my life changed. It wasn't an easy journey. Like most people, serving Him didn't mean we were perfect. We fell apart too. I myself became a disappointment at some point. And somehow, recovering from it was harder than i thought. Not a lot knew about it. I think nobody knew at all about how i swallowed it all. At the peak of my service, i was given many opportunities. Some i wasn't so sure i could handle and some i was struggling to make better. But i accepted them anyway even if my fears were there. It was hard because i wanted to be consistent but my mind was reminding me of the fear of failure. So i just gave up. And that disappointment i brought with me for so long that i wasn't able to renew that passionate self back. Fast forward, years have gone by and a lot of things have changed. I still kept in touch but not as how i used to before. And when i see them, i am reminded of that disappointment. In short, di ako fully nakamove-on. Plus the other factors in my life na nangyari which made me grow farther from them. And then one day, they invited me and i came. I still wasn't consistent with my attendance but little by little i tried. Last May i attended the sportsfest and it was refreshing to be with the people i used to hang with. Namiss ko ng sobra yung company nila. And i felt a little whole. I attended some of the gatherings after, and a month ago i was invited to serve for the promo team for the Live Pure Conference. I, being hungry for service gave in since namiss ko din naman and its one of the things i've enjoyed doing with them before. However, when the days gone by, parang i felt i didn't have that spark anymore. Naubusan ako ng ideas. I felt my work was substandard and it wasn't appealing. I wasn't trying to please anybody but i wanted to be able to inspire through my work. But then, i felt i needed that inspiration more. I wasn't able to give it because i don't have it. Parang hindi ako masaya. I'm not sure. I often felt empty this past few months. I tried setting up staycations for myself para makarelax. Pero hindi eh. I tried looking for some things i could focus on, but then after a while, the enthusiasm died down. So when i came yesterday for the LPCON, i was hoping to have an intervention of some sort. I came alone. I actually registered alone. So i felt more alone that i could have ever imagined. Ewan ko din bakit ako nagregister mag-isa. Haha. Buti na lang last minute, i was able to convince a friend to join me. But i still came for myself. May thoughts of wanting to just ditch the event kaso nakakahiya naman sa niyaya ko at mga nakakaalam na pupunta ako. (My former heads). Fast forward uli, tapos na yung LPCon. And can i just say, that that was the first time after a long time that i felt almost full again. It wasn't technically perfect like di ko memorize yung kanta, di ko kasama mga ka-cluster ko, wala akong actual service on the day itself. But i guess that was what God really wanted. Na maupo ako before him, as an audience, and just feel and listen to what he was trying to tell me. It was fun worshipping again. Feeling that vibe and excitement whenever the band plays that fast song. Tumatalon ako to the beat. Which i did'nt normally do even before. I enjoyed it. I didn't raise my hand, but i sang with all my might. Buti may lyrics sa screen. I loved Kuya Joseph's session. Aside from his witty approach, parang lahat ng sinabi niya pasok sa banga. And it felt good. Really good. The particular highlight was the writing session of the things that made us unhappy. I knew agad what to write because those where the struggles i am currently handling right now. I still do even after yesterday, but it felt good writing it down and surrendering it to Him especially the ones i have no control over. And oh by the way, because of the many crazy times i tried holding back feeling this and that, parang feeling ko ang manhid ko na in a way. However, there was a moment during the exposition of the blessed sacrament that my tears fell. It was actual genuine emotions i felt then and there. And it felt really good. Ate Mariel's session was more of a reminder. And i realized a lot of things from her. That happiness is a daily struggle. And that you can turn negative situations into positive ones by changing the way you look at it. She also reminded me not to dwell on ny fears and insecurities kasi yun yung humaharang para mas maging masaya ang isang tao. Easier said than done pero tama siya eh. We all have that choice to train our mind and heart to choose happiness everyday. Tuesday na ngayon as i end this blog entry. 2 days after attending the live pure con, i am still not perfect. I still have the insecurities and that heavy load in my heart. Pero little by little i am choosing to see the good in the small things. Training my mind not to be too emotional over things i can't control. But i am happy. Kasi i now know how to deal with it. Kasi hindi naman mawawala yun agad agad. And i'm excited to feel the total and true happiness after all these struggles have been replaced with positive outcome. Mahirap, yes. Especially when you're in my shoes. You may not understand what i am going through at the moment pero this i can tell you, from this day forth, i am choosing to spread positivity not just to inspire others but also for my own sake. I am forgiving myself for the things i wasn't able to do before. For my own sanity Lord, guide me as i journey to total freedom and happiness. Thank you Live Pure Conference. Thank you for letting me feel a glimpse of the happiness i could sustain if i bring Him back to my life. :) Namiss ko na magserve! :)