🧙♂️ TAP TAP TAP…
Is this loud glowing box thing working?
A-HA! I see the little blinky light blinking. That means it’s working, yes? No? Too late—I’ve already started.
Welcome to Zosimos Says So!
A blog. A brain spill. A magical cry for help. An overly long scroll of things I find important even if no one else does.
I am—brace yourself—
Zosimos the Eccentrically Enchanted, Unofficial Alchemist of the Wizard Coven, Twice-Banned Mushroom Merchant, and Grand Commander of the Disappearing Sock Society.
You’re welcome.
🐸 Who the frog am I?
Some folks call me a menace.
Others call me completely unqualified.
Still others just shriek “NOT AGAIN!” and dive into hedges.
That’s fine. I’m here anyway.
And now I have:
A keyboard.
A wand.
And a frog.
OH, FROGGY FROGS!
They are both vile and cutesy-cute at the same time!
They make delicious morsels—for breakfast, lunch, second breakfast, tea time, and funerals.
They are also slippery little demon meatballs, and when I try to catch one as it hops away, well…
DAMNED.
STUPID.
FROGS.
Don’t ask.
🧠 What is this blog? What will I do with it? Will there be snacks?
Great questions! Shut up and I’ll answer:
Behind-the-scenes mayhem from Pazzaria Productions
Spark the Flying Frog sightings (and recipes, maybe)
Insight into our books: The Spellbook, The Legend of the Lost Rose, Elyndor and whatever else the elves haven’t stolen yet
Magical merchandise highlights! (Some of it even legal!)
Secret future project leaks that I probably wasn’t supposed to post but OOPS
Enchanted food, wizard fashion, why my left shoe talks at night, and…
Wild theories about whether Spark is a savior… or a snack
✨ Why should you read this?
Because:
I once turned a tax form into a goose (accidentally).
I’ve got insider knowledge on Pazzaria’s magical universe (or at least strong opinions).
I might drop mystery spell codes or forbidden coupons.
You love chaos. And frogs. And the chaos of frogs.
🧪 Blog Subtitle Suggestions I Rejected:
“Definitely Not Cursed”
“Chronicles of a Wand-Wielding Moron”
“Oops! All Magic!”
“I Shouldn’t Have Eaten That Glowstick”
📜 Closing Nonsense
So stay tuned, my twitchy little toadspoons!
I’ll be posting spells, secrets, and strangely accurate predictions (like: “Tomorrow, someone will sneeze.” Told you.)
This blog is now cursed blessed with my presence.
Until next time—
I remain (somehow),
Zosimos the Eccentrically Enchanted
The wand is fine. I’m the problem. 🧙♂️🐸💥
🧷 Now for the Required Keyword Incantation: There. I said the secret SEO words. Now Google, bless this mess.