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This cartoon is rated E for Everyone. Wholesome dolphin content. Have a nice day 🐬🐬🐬🐬🐬🐬 . . . #dolphin #cartoon #tnycartoons #lol #humor #e #thelettere #language #meme #ratedeforeveryone #drawing https://www.instagram.com/p/CNAhl9yDeVD/?igshid=iovhc3lpmxaa
Two Hours ‘Till Kendrick
YOURS: AN ETHAN DOLAN ONE SHOT SERIES
Warning: smut
Author’s Note: thank you everyone who has been so nice and encouraging to me as a writer. I love writing and I love Ethan and all of you have made this this a fun little safe haven for me. I can’t say thank you enough. Drop me a message or an ask. I love talking with you! Now here’s a little Coachella Ethan, kinda, sorta.
“Remember when Ethan gave you fake flowers for Easter?” Cameron spoke dryly, knowing fully well Ethan was only a few feet behind her, leaning against the doorframe and nibbling on a plate of pancakes. You were sitting in front of a mirror curling your hair.
You looked at her through the reflection, a smile stretching at your lips. You went to speak, but were cut off by your obnoxious boyfriend who still spoke with his mouth full no matter how many times you told him it was rude and unbecoming of him.
“Shut up, Cameron!” Crumbs spilled from his mouth and he took to wiping them with the back of his hand. “You can stop giving me crap about that any day now. It’d be greatly appreciated.”
Cameron rolled her eyes. “What went through your head when you thought that was a good idea? I’m genuinely curious.”
Grayson laughed from the other room where he was getting ready. You noticed Ethan frown for a second and clench his jaw before pulling another bite of pancake between his teeth. He wasn’t wearing a shirt, his hair was a wild mess, and the hem of his sweatpants hung on just below his hips. A perfect sight to behold, rough and rugged in the morning.
“I thought they were real until she got all mad at me,” he defended, pointing his fork at you.
“That’s even worse, Ethan!” Cameron laughed. “I’m sorry my brother is an idiot. I don’t know why you date him.”
You smiled while catching his eyes with yours through the mirror. “He brings me to Coachella.”
“Fair enough,” Cameron chuckled, nodding her head. After running a brush through her hair, she tossed it onto the bed and went for the door to get breakfast of her own. “That’s why I claim him as my brother, too. Most days anyway.”
“See, I’m good for something, you admit it.” Ethan said smugly, taking another bite. She rolled her eyes again, sneaking past him. There was no need for words because she could feel her IQ drop lower and lower every time she engaged in any sort of conversation with him, she was sure of it.
You and Ethan were left alone in your room of the rented apartment located in the deepest part of Indio, California. He pushed himself from the door and moved to the bed, plopping down on the mattress with a jump. You must have been staring and it wasn’t until you felt the burn of the curling iron too close to your ear that you actually focused on what you were doing.
“So,” Ethan started. You could feel him watching you as you finished up the last curl. “You only love me for Coachella, is that right?”
Flipping the off switch on the iron, you placed it next to you and uncurled your legs to stand up. It was day three of Coachella, Easter Sunday, and you noticed when you turned around to sit on his lap, face to face, that he was more tan, more bright eyed, and more eager to touch you than he had been day one.
You ran your fingers down his bare arms, biting at your lip. “These are nice,” you mused. Trailing your hands back up, you placed them on each of his cheeks where the slightest bit of scruff was growing in. Before stealing a kiss, you leaned in close and whispered. “I like these, too.” Referring to his lips that you could never get enough of.
Staying in such close quarters with his siblings meant that all weekend long you two hadn’t been as physical with one another the way you each so craved. You flew in Thursday night, having been too tired to even give him a proper ‘hello, i’ve missed you more than I can bear it’ squeeze, let alone make love to him all night.
It was safe to say, that between quick kisses, dancing, sleeping in the same bed, and seeing you in his favorite bikini of yours the other day, the both of you were growing more and more eager by the second. You sitting on his lap wasn’t helping matters either. For quick measure, you curled your legs around his tighter.
“Kiss me again,” he said lowly, rubbing his hands up and down your thighs before slinking around to give a little squeeze to your butt.
So you did, you kissed him. Then you kissed him some more. And some more. And some more and when you needed to come up for air, he still wouldn’t pull apart. He tasted like syrup and chocolate, sweet and sugary. He thought you tasted like cherries and vanilla and maybe just a hint of mint.
His hand wrapped around yours when you somehow managed to bury a couple of your fingers under the hem of his pants. He tore his lips away, but not without hesitation.
“Babe, you know we can’t.”
You did know, but you weren’t sure what came over you. Maybe it was his soft skin that danced under your fingernails or his hair that tickled your cheeks when you kissed his neck. Maybe it was the feeling of his lips on yours, wet and plump. The sound of his subtle moans and mumbles of sweet nothings or the way he called you ‘babe’. Maybe it was all of these things wrapped up in a box and sealed with a bow that made it so impossibly hard to not jump his bones any chance you got.
“Get off my brother so he can get dressed and drive us.” Grayson’s voice was loud and made you jump. “We’re already running later than planned.”
You pulled yourself from Ethan, as much as you didn’t want to, with a frustrated sigh. Ethan stood up after you, softly grabbing your hand. He knew it was disheartening that you had to censor yourselves. He felt just as awful about it, if not more. But he was also over the moon ecstatic that he got to spend today with three people who meant the world to him. That was worth a little waiting.
“Happy Easter?” He raised a brow.
You giggled, pushing onto your tiptoes to lean up and place a delicate kiss on his lips. One more couldn’t hurt, right?
“Happy Easter, E.”
“Love you.”
And like clockwork-
“Love you, too.”
**********
Black vans stuck to the grass after Ethan stepped in a puddle of mud. He had groaned and whined and joked about you having to carry him on your back. You could only offer a eye roll at your drama queen of a boyfriend.
He held your hand as all four of you approached a tent serving lemonade. It was a little hotter today than it had been all weekend, so before taking the plastic cup out of Ethan’s hand, you unfastened the tie on your shirt, exposing more skin.
Ethan swallowed.
He noticed then when your lashes -longer, darker, and fuller -peered up to look at him that you had spent extra time on your makeup, wearing more than usual.
“Here gorgeous,” he stammered, breaking out into a sweat and he didn’t think it was from the weather.
Your fingers rubbed together when exchanging the drink, which might have been on purpose, but who’s to say? The liquid was cold and soothing going down and you made an effort to lick your lips after, knowing Ethan was watching.
He cleared his throat. “Alright guys, meet back here before Kendrick?”
“What?” Grayson asked surprised. “We’re splitting up? Kendrick is hours away!”
Ethan took your hand, intertwining your fingers. “Don’t be a baby, Grayson. We’ve spent the last two days attached at the hip. I’m kind of sick of you,” he joked.
Cameron watched as your eyes lit up with excitement, and you scooted closer to her brother, rubbing his forearm. Knowing you’d wanted your alone time, she turned to Grayson. “We’ll have a better time without them anyways.”
Grayson wanted to shout in protest, but when you smiled before placing a quick peck to Ethan’s shoulder, he figured he’d better let you two have the day. It wasn’t as often as it should have been that the two of you got to spend time together. Him and Ethan were in LA almost always these days and it was draining for him as well. All the nights he’d lost sleep because his brother was facetiming you until the early morning or when he’d have to talk Ethan out of a depressing state of mind because he missed you.
Today, on Easter at Coachella, it was the least he could do.
“Fine,” he sighed before smirking. “Have fun, no monkey business.”
You couldn’t promise anything.
All weekend you’d been pestering Ethan about wanting to ride the ferris wheel, but between appearances at specific tents and meeting fans, you hadn’t gotten around to it until now.
“It’s beautiful,” you spoke quietly, leaning forward in your seat. The sun was peeking over a hill in a orange and pink glow, illuminating the silhouette of palm trees. Views like this one didn’t happen back home.
Ethan’s hand caressed your thigh. He was comfortably lounged back with an arm draped on top of your seat. “Yeah, you are.”
You looked behind your shoulder with a smile on your face. “You’re cheesy.”
He rubbed the back of his neck and laughed. “I know. That one was bad.”
Falling back into him, your ar slinked around his waist and you rested your head on his shoulder. A shiver ran down his spine when you placed a small kiss to his cheek. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been on a dingy ferris wheel and enjoyed himself, but with your warm body curled into him, he figured this one wasn’t half bad.
There were thousands of people down below, looking like little ants with blotches of color here and there. The music was loud, but not too loud. He could still hear the sound of your breath on his neck.
“I’m jealous you get to experience this every day.”
“Coachella?” He questioned, confused.
You giggled. “No, California. I love it here.”
Your voice was soothing, like at any given second you’d fall asleep into a dreamland. Ethan placed a kiss to the top of your head and shut his eyes. The word jealous left a bitter taste on his tongue. You deserved more than to be jealous, he thought. The words tumbled out of his mouth like they couldn’t stand to be unheard a moment longer.
“Why don’t you experience it with me then?”
Your eyes opened so fast it hurt. When you looked at him with confusion he shrugged his shoulder.
“I don’t mean now,” he shook his head. “But maybe when you’re done with school you could move in with me.”
You searched his eyes, looking for some sort of hint that maybe he was only joking around, but you were met with nothing. Nothing but love and kindness and the sweet reflection of the sunset to melt his caramel orbs.
“Seriously?”
He let out an airy laugh. “Yeah, seriously. If that’s something you want.”
You imagined a life where you could share a bed with him every night, his cold toes tickling your warm ones and days spent fighting over the remote or yelling at him for leaving the toilet seat up. You imagined grocery shopping with him, and furniture shopping even though his taste in decor was unnerving. You imagined waking up to him every morning to breakfast in bed and wasting the day away snuggling and kissing and massaging each other's backs. Most of all, you imagined a life where you wouldn’t have to say goodbye.
Tears pooled in your eyes before you could fight them off. “I’d want nothing more.”
His heart skipped a beat and he was quick to pull you in for a kiss. You each smiled into it, overjoyed by what could be in the future. As the ferris wheel dipped down to go around again, Ethan sighed, trailing his hand further up your leg and pulled it so it rested on top of him.
He kissed you with so much lust and aggression and passion, it was dizzying, but the last thing you wanted to do was pull away. You’d been waiting for his touch, his lips, for far too long.
You moaned when his hand moved under you shirt, his fingertips coaxing goosebumps in their wake. “Shit,” you breathed, pulling his hair.
He wanted to pull you closer, to mount you on top of him and feel you right where he needed you, but the seatbelts made that close to impossible. He also didn’t want to risk any pictures being taken of you in such a vulnerable position with him. If there’s one thing he’s learned since moving to California, was that there was always lingering eyes.
You wanted to groan when he pulled away from you. “I’m sorry,” he apologized. “Not here.”
Adjusting your shirt you sat back and pulled your leg off him. Again, you knew he was right and you were happy one of you had a level head about this. But that didn’t make it any less sexually frustrating. Next to you, Ethan felt the same way, wondering how he was going to get off the ride while concealing his hard on.
Ethan pulled his phone from his back pocket and you watched him check the time. “If we leave now, we’ll have two hours before we need to be back here to meet Cam and Grayson.”
You picked up what he was throwing down.
“Let’s go,” you said. He laughed as you eagerly took his hand, stumbling off the ferris wheel when it came to a stop.
Ethan normally considered himself a great driver, he was at ease, relaxed, attentive. It came naturally until you were seated in the passenger seat, reapplying your lipstick in the pull down mirror. Mindlessly he skated his hand to your lap, giving your thigh a squeeze and caressing your skin with his thumb. Anxious to get to the apartment, he ignored the honks he received for switching into the turning lane too short notice and without signal.
After pulling into the parking lot, he unbuckled his seatbelt and helped you out of the car. You kept pace behind him as he trudged through the lobby before taking the elevator up to the third floor. Your breath caught in your throat when he stole a pinch to your butt, not expecting it while sharing the elevator with a mom and her two kids.
Ethan started running down the hall and you laughed, taking off after him. When he stopped short in front of the door, you leaped onto his back, placing kisses at the speed of light to his neck and under his ear. A place that drove him wild.
“So impatient,” he chuckled, turning the key and opening the door, carrying you. Immediately, you were being tossed on the bed, legs being pried open so Ethan could slip himself on top of you, enveloping you in an open mouthed kiss.
Kissing him was your biggest indulgence. No matter how long you did it -whether it was a Sunday snuggled up in bed, or after school on a Tuesday, or in an airport while you hugged goodbye, or even at lunch at a Taco Bell -it was never enough. Kissing him was always a new experience and it would never get old. His hands touched you in new places and his lips never lingered in one spot for long, eager to explore every part of you.
While he bit down on your lip, causing you to whimper, he was painfully aware of all the barriers separating you both. Your choice of outfit left little to the imagination, but he needed you out of it as soon as possible. This left him sighing as he moved his fingers to your jean shorts, fumbling with the zipper.
“Who’s impatient now?” You grinned, shifting your hips to help him slide the material past your knees. He tossed them to the ground and you took it as your opportunity to relieve him of that boring black t-shirt, one you couldn’t comprehend he’d chosen for Coachella of all places.
Your eyes met with slow smiles as you sat up, allowing him to do the same to you. He sucked in a breath at seeing you topless, every time was like the first time. Before his eyes could linger long, you were hastily tugging at his shorts, a clearly defined bulge more than visible.
Ethan pulled away to gasp as your hand slipped under the band of his boxer briefs. Wrapping your fingers around his length, you stroked him in long, slow motions that you knew would drive him crazy.
“Fuck,” he growled, tightening his arms to better hold himself up above you before dropping his forehead to meet yours. Flashing your eyes to his, you held his stare while you worked him. He shut his eyes when you grazed your thumb across the tip.
You used to get nervous that you’d do something to Ethan that he wouldn’t like, sometimes you were even nervous just to talk to him. Every once in awhile, you’d wished you could relive those moments. But now, it was just as exciting because you knew what he liked. You knew if you sucked under his ear long enough his breathing would go ragged and you knew that he loved when you spoke his name as you came undone.
You’d learned that pretty much anything was fair game, he was just happy to be with you. With that in mind, you urged him to lay on his back so you could crawl on top of his. He smirked, wetting his lips before running his bottom lip through his teeth. Drumming his fingers down your sides, a giggle escaped you as he tucked his hands into your underwear. “These are my favorite. How’d you know?”
“I pay attention,” you told him, placing your hands on his chest.
“What else do you pay attention too?” He was smirking now.
“Lots of things,” you mused, rocking into his pelvis, nothing but thin lace separating you from him. “You have this laugh that you do when you know you’ve said something ridiculous and sometimes when you think nobody’s listening, you rap into a spatula when you’re doing the dishes or cooking dinner. When we go on walks, you always stand on the side by the curb so that I won’t get hit by a car.” You stopped to let out a laugh. “As if you could stop a car from hitting me.”
“Hey-”
“Your favorite spot to be kissed is right here,” you bent over, kissing him slowly behind his ear. “And you really like it when I do this,” you said, lifting your hips and quickly pushing yourself back over him. He groaned and bit his lip. “But not too hard.”
At some point during your speech, he’d removed his hands from your bum. Now free, he tucked his thumb against you, rubbing your clit in tortuous circular motions as you swallowed your breath.
“I know you like when I do this,” he said, his voice dangerously low. You could only offer a nod in response, body warm and wet and ready for him. Your toes curled in anticipation.
Your breathing picked up and Ethan finally pulled your underwear to the side, pulling you closer to line up with your entrance. You captured him in a kiss as you allowed yourself to sink onto him with that slow, familiar stretch that left you both sighing. With your palms flat against his chest, you rolled your hips against him, deep and slow while the tingles of pleasure burned inside you. You found yourself picking up speed as Ethan’s nails dug into your skin, dizzy with want and need as everything you’d been anticipating bubbled up low in your belly.
Ethan’s hands were anywhere and everywhere, kneading them over your breasts, trailing them against your sides, rubbing them at your thighs and bum before he sat up, resting his weight on one arm as the other hooked around your waist to bring you closer. Faster, you continued to grind into him, pulling his hair through your fingers and resting your elbows on his shoulders. His lips were on your neck, nibbling down your chest before plucking a nipple into his mouth, swirling his tongue until he drew out a moan that had been building inside of you.
“You’re close,” he whispered.
You nodded, but you knew it wasn’t a question, he knew your body like the back of his hand by now. Truthfully you could have exploded just from him telling you were close, because it always sent shivers down your spine how he knew you in way you didn’t think someone ever could. Finally, he lifted you off him just enough to flip you over. He needed to see you writhing beneath him, a glint in his eyes as you stared back at him.
You were barely settled before he sat back on his knees, yanking you forward so that your hips met again. As he guided himself back inside of you, you locked your legs around his waist feeling full and complete and right where you belonged. With a few more drawn out thrusts, he managed to send you both over the edge, your slurs and hisses and moans all tangled up and swallowed by his lips when he trapped you in a kiss. With your lips hot against each other, you both took steadying breaths before you came to a stop.
“God damn, I can’t wait to live with you,” Ethan expressed, slowly rolling out of you. “We can christen the whole place. I want to have you in every room.”
“For now,” you hummed, climbing back on top of him with uneven breaths. His hands squeezed your hips. “How about you keep taking me right here.”
So he did. Again and again until you were twenty minutes late to meeting up for Kendrick Lamar. Dancing and grinding into Ethan during the concert, his hands running over your hips and arms, he wasn’t sure how you were supposed to hop on a flight back home tomorrow. He also wasn’t sure where he’d gotten the courage to ask you the one thing that had been on his mind for weeks now -for you to move in with him -but he was sure glad he did. It wouldn’t be tomorrow, it wouldn’t be weeks from now, and it wouldn’t be months from now. But it would be someday.
As he watched you smile and dance and rap every verse to Backseat Freestyle, someday sounded pretty damn good with every passing second.
He Was Lost
The past three months were lonely.
That was putting it lightly, because honestly, how were you supposed to feel when you’re suddenly living without the other half of your heart -your best best friend, the love of your life. It wasn’t supposed to end the way it did. To be fair, you never imagined there would be an ‘end’ at all.
You remembered that day like it was yesterday, replaying the turn of events over and over again. Maybe if you’d looked him in the eyes more. Maybe if you’d kissed him harder. Maybe, if you’d hugged him a little bit longer. Then maybe, just maybe, he would still be yours, right where he belonged.
As a couple, you weren’t perfect, and neither of you were ever ashamed to admit that. You had dumb arguments over dumb things, like when you poked fun at his boxers with the lacrosse sticks all over them or when he bought you tulips for Easter…and they were fake. Once, you even argued about how many arguments you’d ever had.
But now, laying in bed with your back against the wall, the light from your phone illuminating your face in the darkness of your bedroom, you wished you could bottle up those moments. Those perfectly imperfect moments, because on top of those came a lot of laughs. Full belly, ab crunching, tears in your eyes, crinkles in your nose, best kind of laughing. You missed it all.
Tabloids, gossip, and more specifically, rumors, they were never your thing. With Ethan, it never even crossed your mind to pay any attention to them, but without him it was damn near impossible to not succumb to the pressure. Surprisingly, fans of Ethan started tagging you in posts on twitter and in pictures on instagram for weeks and weeks -which came as a shock because you weren’t even sure if the majority of them liked you -but it wasn’t until now that your curiosity got the better of you.
She had blonde hair, legs for days, big, pouty lips, and of course, she just had to be a model. She was beautiful. Your stomach tightened, feeling uneasy and almost nauseous as you scrolled through the pictures. They were never ‘actually’ photographed together, but you could tell those were his hands, his slender fingers you adored, and you vividly remembered that blue tank top. You’d told him it made his arms look big while he accompanied you to babysitting your little cousin last summer, helping her along the monkey bars and catching her when she flew down the slide.
Continuing to stare at the pictures, it wasn’t anger or jealousy you felt. It was sadness. A kind of sadness you’d never felt before. You and Ethan had never really been without each other and maybe that was coming back to haunt you. He was always your person, for as long as you could remember. That annoying, hyper, nose picker who’d pass you notes in class every year until you turned thirteen and his mom brought you both to that pizzeria on 9th Avenue and you each stupidly ordered spaghetti. He was your first date, your first kiss, your first boyfriend, your first time. He was your everything and you thought you were his, too.
The worst part about it was that, it would still be you if it wasn’t for distance. Your eyebrows furrowed at the realization and you didn’t like that because she resided in California, she was the one who got to get lost in his whiskey colored eyes and touch him in all the places you knew best.
The night you two called it quits, he had made sure you knew it wasn’t because of anything you did or could do or vise versa. He told you it wasn’t because he hated you because he never could, and it wasn’t because he didn’t love you anymore because he did and probably always would. With shaky hands and swollen eyes, you broke up, because after weeks and weeks of contemplation, Ethan decided it was time to let you go.
"Life’s too short to spend it waiting on me to come home,” he’d whispered, wiping a tear from your cheek. “You deserve better than that.”
You couldn’t keep track of the amount of times you replayed his sentences in your head. You understood where he was coming from because you’d felt the same way before a million times. You’d thought he’d deserved better, too. Someone he wouldn’t have to come home to because with them, he would be home already. Someone who could relate to his lifestyle more, maybe even have the same goals and aspirations. Someone who was more convenient.
Maybe someone like this Meredith girl.
But that was then and you could slap yourself for not noticing what you had until it was gone. He was wrong, though. You didn’t deserve better, because you see, it didn’t get any better than Ethan. You were sure of that now.
Your breath felt heavy in your lungs, like smoke in a burning building. Clicking your phone off, you turned on your side before burrowing further under the covers. You were probably crazy, but sometimes you thought you could still pick up on his scent on the pillows on the side of your bed he insisted on sleeping on when he stayed the night -closest to the window in case he needed to jump out of it to run from your father.
Slowly, a big, bulky tear fell from your eye, slithering down your face. The more you tried to hold it all together, the less it worked and soon, waterfalls streamed out of your irises, blurring your vision. The darkness of your room swallowed you alive and sadly, you welcomed it in because you’d rather feel nothing at all than all the mixed emotions you had swirling inside you right now.
The amount of hope you had that you and Ethan would get back together was now shrinking smaller and smaller under the weight of her blue green eyes and five foot, ten inches of sun kissed skin.
You let yourself cry because it was all you had left. Sobbing into one of his sweatshirts, God you hatedhim. You hated those pictures of him ‘supposedly’ with the gorgeous blonde and how fast he seemed to move on. You hated his laugh that gave you butterflies and his grin that could cure the common cold.
You hated every inch and curve of him that you had memorized, embedded into your brain. You hated when he called you Giggles and that he kissed your temple when you got anxious and that sometimes he’d wake you from your slumber by tickling your stomach and armpits.
You hated that you loved him and you hated that you really didn’t hate him at all, and that even though you were drowning in sadness because of him, you were sure you’d always come sprinting back with open arms. It hurt to love someone so much.
You knew you shouldn’t, but before you could try to stop yourself, your fingers were aimlessly flicking through the contacts on your phone before landing on one specific letter.
E.
Your heart raced as it rang once…palms sweating when it rang twice, and by the third, you were a split second away from hanging up when a deep, all too familiar, slightly gravelly voice echoed through the speaker. He spoke your name and your breathing hitched.
There was a long pause. You didn’t think he’d actually pick up.
“You there?”
“Um, yeah, I’m here,” you cleared your throat. “I’m not sure why I called.”
“I’m glad you did.”
Ethan was perched on the couch with Grayson playing video games when he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. He was beating his brother in Mario Kart, but not by much. With Grayson’s baby Mario and Luigi riding close on his coat tails, he normally would never bother giving into the distraction, being as competitive as he was, but for some reason, this time he did.
When his eyes locked onto your name across the screen, he had to blink and let it sink in for a second. He couldn’t believe you’d ever want to speak to him again. Hell, it took everything in him not to text you everyday, thinking he could maybe get away with a simple ‘good morning’ or ‘hey’. But he knew he broke your heart, something you trusted him with and he failed you, so he decided to give you your space.
He pulled himself from the game, apologizing to his brother before closing himself in his room to take your call.
There was mostly silence mixed with faint sounds he thought maybe resembled sniffling. He took in a steady breath with goosebumps popping up on his skin. If you were crying, he wasn’t sure how he’d handle himself. He’d done more crying in the past few months than he ever had in his life. Ethan walked around with a constant heavy feeling, like a weight slowly crushing down on him that he couldn’t free himself from without your reassuring hand squeezes or tight hugs or the happy lines in your cheeks when you smiled at him.
“Are you okay?” He asked and immediately regretted it, rubbing a hand to his face.
That was a loaded question. You had just cried until it hurt and you couldn’t recognize your own sob. Half of your heart was all the way across the country and talking to you through a cell phone. You were pretty sure there was an indent in your mattress in the shape of your body from how often you resided there now, shut out from the world. You weren’t okay. You were empty.
And yet…
“Yeah.” Your voice cracked, lowering to a whisper. “I’m okay.”
Ethan’s chest tightened. He knew if you felt even a teeny tiny sliver of what he was feeling, then no, you definitely weren’t okay. He couldn’t beat himself up long enough before his eyes widened in surprise at your following words.
“Do you love her?”
He wanted to cry, in fact he could feel the heat flood his cheeks and wetness behind his eyes. For you to think that any part of his heart wasn’t completely and one hundred percent yours was something unimaginable. You lingered on every piece of him, head to toe.
“No.” He shook his head. It was the easiest question he’d ever had to answer.
You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. He answered so fast and so sure that you couldn’t help but feel some relief.
“Are you happy? With her?” Maybe you were being invasive, but you knew these questions would only eat at you from the inside out if you didn’t voice them.
He didn’t want to lie to you because he and Meredith shared some great moments together. But he also didn’t want to lie to himself, because although it was easy to get her to laugh, it wasn’t your laugh. Her touch didn’t send shivers down his spine the way yours did. And when she’d offered him her body after a heated make out session at her beach house, he’d lied and said he had to meet Grayson for dinner.
With her it would have been sex. Nothing more, nothing less. And sure, it probably would have felt okay. But with you, it wasn’t okay, it was mind blowing. It was passionate, and erotic, sometimes sweet and slow, sometimes fast and aggressive. He’d learned it all with you and you with him and the thought of suddenly sharing something that was always reserved for the two of you, with someone else, felt wrong in more ways than one.
“I-I don’t know,” Ethan replied.
You swallowed, preparing yourself for words that were going to be the hardest to say. “Well, when you do know, and if you are… just know I’m happy for you.”
You both shut your eyes with heavy hearts. Letting the tears fall now, Ethan crumbled, lip quivering and clutching onto the phone so tightly that his knuckles turned white.
“Do you hate me?” He blubbered.
You choked on a sob. “No, E, never.”
“I want you to hate me. I want you to tell me I’m a fucking idiot because that’s exactly what I am.” He was a mess now, tapping his leg aimlessly and feeling like the walls were closing in on him. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I just… let you go. My best fucking friend. I thought I was doing what was best for you, for us; but this sucks! This all sucks so much without you.”
You covered your hand over your mouth, trying to hold in all the sobs and cries and gasps you wanted to release. But when he was weak, you needed to be strong.
“Ethan-”
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he realized, using the collar of his shirt to wipe his nose. “Can’t you just tell me what to do? I’m lost, okay? Just tell me, please. Tell me!”
This whole time, since the breakup, you’d hoped and prayed for a moment like this. You thought that if it were your choice and you gave the go ahead, you’d just get back together and that would be that. But listening to him, the cracks in his voice and muffled cries, you fully understood why this was all needed to begin this. Maybe you both needed time apart to realize how much you truly meant to one another.
It was a moment of clarity.
“Ethan, listen to me.” You spoke steadily and he did, he hung onto every word. “I love you. Okay? I love you so much I can’t breathe. So, no I don’t hate you and you’re right, this does suck and it’s hard and it hurts like hell, right?” You clutched to the sweatshirt of his you had lying next to you. It wasn’t his hand, but it would do for now. “And as much as I want to, I’m not going to tell you what to do, E. If you come back to me, it will be because you want to not because I said so.”
His shoulders slumped. “You make it sound so easy. What if it doesn’t work out? What if eventually, we never get back together?” It hurt to hear himself say it out loud. He shot a look towards his favorite framed picture of the two of you on his dresser, the one he couldn’t bring himself to tuck away into a drawer somewhere. “I don’t want that for us. I-I don’t know how to be without you.”
“I know,” you reassured him. “It will work out.”
It would work out because it had to. There was no chance in hell that nearly twelve years of your lives side by side would have been nothing but a waste of time. No way that four years together as lovers was somehow supposed to be forgotten and moved on from. That was impossible.
“How do you know?”
“I just do. Trust me on this,” you smiled and it was foreign on your lips. “Now try to get some sleep. We could both use some.”
He had to hold back a yawn at the mention of sleep, realizing how tired and drained he had become. He dreaded going to sleep without you cuddled in the space next to him. He was a cold sleeper and usually got a better rest with your space heater legs intertwined with his, as he liked to call them.
“Thanks for calling. I’ve missed your voice.” The yawn escaped. “Goodnight, Giggles.”
Your heart skipped a beat.
“Goodnight, E.”
Both of you were reluctant to hang up, but you clicked the end call button with a steadier hand than you had when calling. You weren’t positive if Ethan had his head screwed on straighter after your conversation, but you sure did. You loved him, so it was no question that you’d be there for him through this. He was lost right now, but he wouldn’t be forever.
And when he was ready for you, you would be ready for him.
Flames and Snowflakes
‘Yours’ one shot series - Ethan Dolan
Warning: smut
Two pairs of snow boots heavily trudged uphill on slick and slushy terrain. The sun was shining brightly in the clouded sky, but beneath it was deceiving- trees without leaves, snow and ice filtering the ground, crisp flakes soaring and swooshing about with the wind. It was cold, the skin on Ethan’s arms erupting in goosebumps under his coat while he held firmly to his snowboard. A smirk lifted on his lips listening to you moan and groan.
“Go to Colorado, they said. It'll be fun, they said.” You huffed, stepping around a few more boulders, twigs crunching under your feet. “I knew I should've tagged along with Grayson, instead.”
Ethan turned his head around to look back at you with a grin lighting up his face, teeth brighter than the snow under his feet. “But you can't go snowboarding in Hawaii.”
“Oh no,” you gasped in a mocking manner. “The horror! What ever would I do? Beaches, flowers, warmth, the ocean… who needs ‘em, am I right?”
Ethan laughed again, finding humor in what a drama queen you could be. He knew Colorado wasn’t your idea of a dream vacation, but he also knew that you and him could have the best time no matter where you were. Even in a detention room with no windows where you ended up after skipping biology class together to go make out on the football field.
“This will be fun, Giggles, I promise. I’ll teach you everything I know. You’ll be a pro boarder in no time.” He offered, helping you along a steeper part of the trail by keeping a firm grip on your arm.
You giggled, usually a sure gesture after hearing his nickname for you. A blush crept onto your already rosey cheeks. You'd never stepped foot on a snowboard in your life, so your stomach was starting to feel a little wonky with nerves.
“Ten bucks I fall and break my face,” you muttered, wholeheartedly seeing that in your near future.
Ethan chuckled, sliding his palm down your forearm until it effortlessly molded together with yours, fingers interlacing. He looked at you, nodding. “I bet twenty.”
After countless minutes of trudging in bulky snow pants and shoes heavier than necessary, the two of you reached the top of the slope. It was a man made trail, paved by boards of people who lived life on the edge and who wouldn't settle for a ski resort. Obviously, Ethan was one of those people. He loved adventuring and doing everything and anything that involved trying something new.
He thought that was an attractive quality about you, that even though you got nervous and second guessed yourself, and sometimes it took convincing from his end, you were always willing to at least give things a shot. You didn't have to love it or be good at it or even follow through with it, the fact that you tried was all it took for him to be the proudest boyfriend on earth.
“Does that feel too tight?” Ethan asked, strapping your feet to the board. It was pink and blue with the name “Cameron” written across the top in graffiti-like style. You mentally cursed her for playing a part in your death in loaning it to you for the trip.
You shimmied your ankles a little. “No, it feels fine.”
“How bout now?” He questioned again after pulling the straps even tighter.
“Ethan!” You exclaimed, grimacing and trying to wiggle your toes, but coming up unsuccessful. “I'm gonna lose circulation.”
“Perfect,” he smiled, standing up and pulling you to your feet along with him. “You're hating this already, aren't you?” he guessed. When his fingers plucked the goggles from the top of your forehead and positioned them securely over your eyes, you exhaled a breath, a small cloud forming past your lips.
“No, no, E, I'm just,” you paused, turning to look down the hill. Ethan had told you that compared to most, this one wasn't even that steep. It didn't look like an easy slope though. In that moment, it looked like the edge of a cliff. “I'm just freaking out a bit.”
“I know.” Ethan nodded before zipping your coat up as far as it could go. “Your hands have been shaking since we got out of the car.” He tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear and adjusted the hat on your head, making sure everything was in place. “But you're gonna fall, and I'm gonna laugh at you.”
He smiled, a vivid contrast to the frown forming on your face. “You're not making me feel better.”
He rolled his eyes playfully while pulling you to him, a soft and squishy embrace from the heavy layers you each were wearing. His lips came in contact with your forehead for a brief moment. “I'm not gonna let you get hurt, okay?” Your hands slinked around to his back while he captured you in a kiss. It was warm, heating you up from the inside out.
He helped you jump over to the edge where the ground began to dip down underneath you. Ethan left his board rested against a pine tree, making the smart decision to stand by you on foot. He could feel your body tense up as he held your hand again.
“We don't have to do this. We can stop right now and go get some hot chocolate with those little marshmallows you love.” He'd never make you do anything you didn't want to do, especially knowing about your slight issue with heights, but he had a feeling that you would actually really like snowboarding once you got the hang of it. Maybe it would even become something you bonded over as a couple.
Your eyes brightened when you looked at him and listened to the sound of his voice, genuine and filled with so much sincerity. Here he was, treating you to a week in Colorado for your spring break, listening to you and comforting you and rubbing small circles in your hand with his thumb. There was nobody on the planet who craved physical activity and a good old fashioned adrenaline rush the way Ethan did, yet here he was offering to give that up for some tiny marshmallows and hot chocolate.
This boy embodied selflessness and you'd forever be thankful for that.
That in mind, you put on a brace face, a smile and the raise of an eyebrow, before clutching his hand tighter and shaking it in between the space between you with excited nerves.
“Let’s go,” you declared. “I've got this.”
He knew you were terrified and out of your element, yet here you were, pulling up your big girl panties and braving the storm. And it wasn't to impress him and it wasn't in any way, shape or form, conceited. It was to make him happy and truth be told, nothing made him happier.
You launched yourself forward, a gust of bravery burning through you. The force caused your hand to let go of Ethan's, the board hitting the ground in such a way that made you wiggle and struggle to stay grounded. You glided four or five feet, Ethan running next to you, before falling straight forward on your stomach. A solid ‘oomf’ sound ghosting off your lips.
You craned your head to the left, catching a glimpse of Ethan clenching his stomach, rolled over in a proper belly laugh, his face glowing as red as a tomato. “See,” you yelled, attempting to pull yourself up, but failing miserably. “Pay up!”
Ethan's face hurt from smiling. “How did I get so lucky,” he wondered while swiping at his under eyes. You toppled over again while trying to stand and it only made him laugh harder.
The sun was setting by the time you found yourselves wandering back to the rental car. Butts were bruised, frustrated tears were shed, laughs were had, and kisses were shared. Ethan wasn't sure if you made any progress, but he was proud of you and you could feel it, it was in his hug after a particularly big fumble and it was in his smile every time he had to place you back on your feet.
You got lost on your way back to the cabin, but neither of you minded. You were in no rush. The way the sun cascaded into the horizon line resembled that of lava. Reds, oranges, and yellows molded together in a beautiful, painted piece of artwork. Ethan’s eyes flickered over to you sitting cross legged in the passenger seat, cheeks red with matted hair. As the last of the sunlight crept through the windshield, illuminating all his favorite parts of your face like the glint in your eyes, the curve of your nose, the freckle on your cheek, and the bow of your lips, you took his breath away. The way you always did without even knowing it.
He opened his hand rested on the center console between the two of you and within a second your fingers laced between his, an instinct you happily obliged. Butterflies twisted in his stomach when he kissed your knuckles and you giggled. He smiled to himself when your eyes eventually fluttered closed, peacefully falling asleep with your head resting towards the window. Your hand went limp, but Ethan never dared letting go of it.
“Wake up, sleepy head.” Ethan nudged you when he was parked in the driveway of the cabin he had rented out for the week. He was holding a camera in his hand, but it wasn't on. You figured maybe he had done some filming while you were sleeping.
“Sorry I fell asleep,” you apologized, unbuckling your seatbelt and getting out of the car in time with him. “It hit me like a brick.”
He chuckled while scooping the boards from the trunk. “Flying to LA and Colorado in the same day will do that to you.”
Following him through the doors, you realized neither of you had a chance to really settle in. You'd brought your suitcases in and that was it before leaving for some pizza and snowboarding, if you could even call what you experienced snowboarding.
Inside was a narrow entrance way, enough room to take off your shoes before coming to a door on the right, a bathroom with a big selfie taking mirror as Ethan called it. The living room and kitchen area were connected in a quaint little space, perfect for the two of you. You didn't need much.
“I'm going to take a bubble bath,” you said, slinking a hand across Ethan's chest as you sauntered past him. You made eyes at him that he picked up on straight away. “Why don't you finish lighting the fireplace and join me?”
He clenched his jaw, watching you walk away with the bite of his lip. It took him longer than he cared to admit to get the fire going, fumbling with the pitch fork and getting the wood to align properly, but it all easily slipped his mind when he found you in the tub, fresh faced, naked, and bubbles in your hair.
“Hurry up, the water’s getting cold.”
He rolled his eyes, unbuckling his pants and stripping himself of his shirt. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. Scoot over.”
You slid to the corner of the tub before he slipped into the spot across from you. You twirled your finger, signaling for him to turn around. He obeyed, sighing as he relaxed into you, your legs on either side of him. Your head rested above his shoulder and he shut his eyes.
“You smell like strawberries and vanilla,” he hummed, bathing in the feeling of you wrapped around him. He liked to be the little spoon sometimes, but he'd be damned if Grayson ever found out about it.
You gave a peck to his neck. Silence enveloped the room and you sat like that awhile, you holding him and massaging him and running your fingers through his hair. Eventually Ethan leaned forward a bit so you could scrub his back with a loofa.
“You miss Grayson, don't you?”
He let out a laugh. “I'm sitting here naked with you and you’re thinking of my brother?”
You chuckled back. “It’s weird not having to worry about him barging in on us. I mean, it's nice… but weird.”
He nodded, twisting around to face you. Truthfully, Ethan did miss Grayson, a lot. He knew it was going to feel odd being apart from his twin brother for so long, but he wasn't expecting the constant pit in his stomach. He hadn't wanted to bring it up to you for fear of making you feel bad, like somehow you'd think you weren't enough to keep him company because it wasn't like that at all, but he should have known you already knew.
“Yeah, I can't explain it. You're right, it's just like this really weird feeling,” he told you. “I don't like it.”
“I know.” You scooted closer to him, slinking your arms around his neck. “But I like having alone time with you. I’ve missed this.” You looked into his whiskey eyes as he brought your foreheads together.
“Me too,” he grinned, relaxing at your touch. The pit in his stomach fading away little by little.
He looked back and forth between your eyes while running a hand to your hair, tucking some behind your ear. Beauty. Complete and utter beauty was all he saw when he looked at you, physical and inner beauty. It didn't get any better than you, he thought. In an instant, your lips crashed together, two magnets unable to resist pulling towards one another. The water rippled as you attached your body flush against his, eager to have him as close to you as possible. Ethan broke the kiss just enough to graze down your neck. He placed delicate love bites to the soft skin there while your head rolled back in bliss. You could feel him hardening between your thighs, heat lighting you from within.
The two of you were completely oblivious to the deteriorated bubbles and how the water had gone ice cold, making your fingers and toes prune-like. Ethan moaned as you rocked into him and his hands continued exploring your body, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake.
Your hand found the courage to snake between you, curling finger by finger around his length. Ethan let out a low sigh as he harshly bit down on your lip, becoming desperate for anything you were willing to offer him. You broke the kiss, but kept your faces so close together he could feel the tickle of your eyelashes on his. His eyes bore into yours as the pace of your hand picked up a little speed. The motion of your hand and the pressure of you grinding into his lap had Ethan breathless as he lulled his head back against the edge of the tub.
Before that familiar feeling could bubble up in his stomach and curl his toes, he motioned you to stop before taking your hand and leading you out of the bathtub with him. “Let’s finish this by the fire,” he insisted, voice deep and gravelly.
You squealed when he plucked you up off the ground before throwing you over his shoulder and jogging to the other room. Your hair fanned out on the pillow when he dropped you to the mattress. The bed springs squeaked when he followed suit, hovering over you. It didn't take long for his lips to envelope yours again.
His hand rubbed over your breast before running it down your stomach and thigh. He started slinking downward, and a fire lit in your belly, similar to the one by your feet keeping the room warm and toasty. His tongue lapped past your belly button before he placed soft pecks on each of your inner thighs.
“You taste like soap,” Ethan blurted, breaking the silence then continued on.
You giggled and his eyes found yours looking down at him. You bit down on your thumb as his tongue slowly glided over where you wanted him most. He groaned into you because fuck you tasted good. The vibration of his voice made your toes curl and your skin tingle. When you brought your hand from your mouth to the mattress, it bumped into Ethan's and like always, your fingers wound together. Ethan stuck to counterclockwise circles, every so often changing the pressure.
You sat up, propping yourself up on your elbows. It blew your mind what Ethan could do with his tongue. Smiling to himself he watched your every move. The way you twisted and turned, the way you tugged at his hair, and the way you bit your lip and shut your eyes.
He placed an open mouth kiss to your core while you sucked on his finger, hinting what he was about to do next. Wordlessly, you nodded, giving him the go ahead as he inserted his finger into you, slowly gliding all the way in and back out.
A sigh escaped you when Ethan sided up next to you, keeping the pace of his finger. He kissed your lips, letting you taste yourself on him. “More,” you whispered, cupping his cheek with your hand.
In the next push, another finger was inside of you and he curled them upward in the spot closest to your entrance. Ethan kissed your temple as your breathing picked up, growing impatient. His fingers were veterans, skilled with years of practice, but you knew with how desperate you were to feel all of him, that they weren't going to cut it.
“I need you,” you spoke with a shaky voice. “Now, Ethan.”
He didn't get the chance to tease you a moment more before you tugged his hand away from you, clenching your shaking legs together. Ethan thought he couldn't be more turned on his life, giving himself a few strokes while you rolled over onto your side, facing away from him. It was his turn to be the big spoon, and rightfully so. He placed a kiss to the side of your neck while scooting towards you until your back was against his chest. Slowly his left hand skates down your bum and grasped your thigh, lifting it to grant himself room to slip in. Inch by inch he pushed into you, his hot breath on your cheek building as you stretched for him.
He could feel every curve and divot and soft spot inside you and he moaned when they clenched around him, welcoming him in. He propped himself up on his elbow with his other arm, getting a better angle to study your face as he rocked into you at a slow rhythm.
It was raw and deep and perfect and he smelled so good. You were complete putty in his hands. You loved the feeling of him coming into you from behind, pushing at your sweet spot over and over again.
“Fuck, you're so wet.” His lips laid upon your cheek lazily as he spoke. Skin tickled with shivers when he let out a breathy chuckle. “You're amazing.”
You tilted your head, catching his lips in a kiss and he groaned when you arched into him, meeting his thrusts. Needing him closer, your hand snaked around to the back of his thigh, pushing and pushing him harder into you. An endless supply of high pitched moans fell from your lips as Ethan's movements picked up. When his hand danced from your thigh to your clit, giving it light and tender, circular motions, your nails dug into his flesh..
“Don't...dont…” you cried. You could feel it --the ripple in your stomach. You were coming undone around him.
“Don't what?” He breathed into you ear, keeping his pace with his hips and finger.
“Ethan, please.”
“Are you gonna come?”
You could only offer a quick nod, unable to speak as you came, hard and unapologetically. Ethan hissed, feeling the gush of your orgasm wrapped around him. Your eyes closed after you withered into him, letting him ride you out.
You were a little disoriented when Ethan slid out of you, but the sound of his voice was music to your ears. “Lay on your back. Come here, baby.” He commanded.
He was inside you again, but on top of you this time, making it easy for you to wrap your legs around his waist. Ethan couldn't stop kissing you, touching you, staring into you while he rocked his hips. You scratched at his back, encouraging him to get to that place you both wanted him to be so badly.
You looked into his eyes and smiled. God, you were sexy, he thought. “I love you,” you told him, eyes watering with admiration and bliss and pure ecstasy.
“I love you, too.”
Within seconds he was edging his own orgasm. You could tell by the way he was breathing and groaning and by his sloppy, jerky movements. His whiskey eyes shown in the firelight and you'd never been more ready for him.
“I’m gonna--”
You nodded, pushing him closer to you with your lower hand on his back. He bit down on your shoulder as he spilled himself into you. You sighed out at the sticky warmth, feeling filled and spent and, damn, so incredibly in love.
Here they were, a young couple from New Jersey spending a week together in Colorado with snow, a toasty fireplace, and a cabin. Even though it was only the first day, laying in bed with his girl asleep on his chest, he found himself asking for the second time, how did he get so lucky?
Ethan’s not even that good looking.....SAID NO ONE EVER
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