My hands up to the maker, my head's down in the bomb
I swim in bloated vision, and I kiss you on the phone
My heart beats so atomic, and I spill the sweat of drones
A mouth screams to a hundred, and my lips split all alone
Monster Magnet - Dopes To Infinity - Third Alternative
Feedback and empty spaces. Rattling tambourines as guitars slip and slide out of focus. Reverb on a mic test and then the main riff comes in and it’s so slow. We going down now. Come with me. This is where the fears hide. Body swaying as the slow guitar just keeps taking me over. And then it all comes crashing down into an almighty crescendo of self doubt. Sometimes. I hope this torture just goes on. Down, further and further. Well I stuffed myself in a pit of darkness and I swam til I can’t see home.
This is my comfort food. Just lost in the guitars and psychedelic soundscapes of absurdity. Slowed down to fuck so the torment of self criticism made manifest in song just lasts longer. Let it linger. Let it destroy my psyche and let it crumble the sad little urges that make me keep pushing forward. Push it off the edge of nowhere. Everything I’ve ever known. This is what you asked for. Now this is what you get. Carnivorous guitars inside a cave black as night. Sounds just bouncing around my head and no escape from the condemnation. Guitars growing louder. Filling that space. Dropping everything off the edge of nowhere. Everything I’ve ever known. I’ve ever known. I’ve ever known. Repeated and repeated and repeated. And repeat and repeated. It’s nothing and not for anything or any purpose. It’s the end of all knowledge and sacrifice of all ego while a wall of guitars and psychedelia just batter the senses into submission.
This is my go to happy place. When I feel lost and without direction. Just remember that nothing ever means anything and you can just shove it all off the edge of nowhere into an abyss of your own making. Serenity from total surrender of the ego and remembering the ego is just something that gets in the way of living. Perhaps. Maybe. Who knows? I don’t have the answers. I just find inspiration from my own meandering interpretations of songs.