Mar 8, 2025
i think im just incapable of human connection
like theres some switch that burned out, and the parts for it are not being made anymore
im not sure how it was like to have that switch non-broken, so i cant even fully comprehend what im missing
but im definitely missing something
#mine#vent#i hear people longing for a hug or counting days untill they see someone and i completely dont understand it#like i understand theoretically#but i cant imagine feeling it myself#most times im with someone i just wait to go back to being alone#its strange both cos i do love people#im capable of it#and cos when i was a kid i couldnt bare being left alone even for two minutes#or id have an anxiety attack#was that feeling so intence that it broke the switch?#sorry lmao im sober right now im just suddenly feeling it again#this profound alienation#tumblr tags is the only way left in which i can imagine opening up a bit#im a yapper but if you ever genuinely ask me how i am i will laugh and run away#undiagnosable