#this was before

[parliamentrook]

also I’m cute and I got a new hat the other day from KingGuro

[kookygobbledygook]

On the day of David Lynch's passing I want to reccount my most Lynchian experience. Partly because all the smart people are already saying all the smart good words about him, but mostly because I think he'd get a kick out of it.

I work in disability and I used to work in a group home for disabled people. Let me say off the bat that the disability aspect was NOT AT ALL the Lynch-like part of the story.

There was a man living in this house who we'll call Johnny Hill. Johnny Hill loved music, playing with water, wooden spoons and hiding things under his bed as a joke. He was also autistic and legally blind.

Because he was legally blind, his parents gave him two things that were crucial to this story; a cuckoo clock, so he could hear the time change, and The World's Worst Toy called Clarence the Clown. You know those stackable rings that are on a pole. It was like that but with the facial features of a clown. I was worried about finding the words to express how horrifying this toy is but I've shockingly found a video.

This was Johnny Hill's favourite toy; the clown with the tear-away face.

So here is what happened from Johnny Hill's point of view; He wakes up in the middle of the night. He can't tell it's the middle of the night, being blind and everything. He gets up, sits in the armchair in the corner of his room, and starts playing with a toy. I come in and weirdly snap at the poor guy to "go to bed!" He does and goes back to sleep.

Got it? Literally nothing creepy happened and I need you all to understand that.

So here's my point of view:

I knew I had about two or three night shift coming up, and in this particular house you had to be awake the whole night in case of emergencies. It was always a struggle but I had recently began experimenting with a new technique. The night before a run ofnight shifts, I'd stay up until around three o'clock. The idea was that by staying up I'd sleep in later the next day and then on my night shift I could push through the whole night without being to exhausted. It didn't end up working, but it was worth a shot.

So how did I plan to stay up until 3 the night before?

I thought of a great plan.

I'd finish off Twin Peaks.

This was not a good idea.

Because that meant the next night at around two o'clock in the morning I was awake, by myself, in the group home, with Laura Palmer's backwards screams still echoing through my psyche.

And while I may have been okay stay in the brightly lit office (which was actually a corner of a kitchen) I had a job to do. What job? Sneaking quietly through the house and checking on all the people living there every hour, to make sure they were asleep, not having a seizure etc.

So coming up to three o'clock, I gather all my courage and make my checks, terrified that I'll see this at the foot of one of the guys' beds

Johnny Hill was on the opposite end of the house he was last. Naturally, I didn't want to wake him if he was asleep so I crept into his room to check, eyes straining to see in the dark.

Only to find his bed empty.

Suddenly I hear a noise that sounds like circus music coming behind me. I span around to see a figure sitting in the dark, pulling apart a laughing mechanical clown heads, just as the cuckoo clock went off in the background.

It's the only time in my life I was too scared to scream. Which was lucky because I would have woken the entire house.

It took me at least thirty seconds of pants-shitting panic to realise the man in the chair was Johnny Hill.

I'll admit I was less than chill when I said "Johnny Hill! Back to bed!"

It's very funny in retrospect.

David Lynch talked a lot about fate. I don't believe in fate the same way he seemed to. But I am prepared to admit this; a lot of really fucked up coincidences had to aline for me to experience one of the most surreal and petrifying moments of my life the day after I finished the original run of twin peaks.

There is no real point to this post. Other than I'm going to miss that delightful weirdo that once, though the power of his art, almost gave me a stroke at work.

[country-girl-in-pearls]

[6ixshitttttt]

I'm having a freaking party tn, I'm making vegan jello shots for my friends 💃🏾

[biscuitfortune]

someone said, “we need to take away the guns,” and someone else responded “we don’t even know the motive yet!”

[clementinefight]

Out in the parking lot, after work You don’t smoke and at this point, I don’t either Winter is a beheaded beauty, each day rearranging its guts I don’t know The curve of your body against winter is enough to break me down for life

[trueoathbreaker]

there they go