#thommy limerick

[sagestreet]

There once was a footman so blond,

that Thomas of him was quite fond.

He acted all straight,

'til it was too late

for Thomas to know he’d been conned.

(Ahhhh...why am I doing this to myself???)

On, no, hang on. I fixed it:

There once was a footman so blond,

that Thomas of him was quite fond.

He did classify,

himself as so bi,

that Thomas with him did abscond.

Okay, now I can go to sleep. Phew.

[sagestreet]

Downton limerick No.17

I haven't even seen the first Downton film, and yet you've all 'infected' me with your Barris spoilers...from two years ago.:)

So here goes yet another Downton limerick:

Downton limerick No. 17 (I think?)

There once was a chappie called Ellis,

who saw Barrow knew just what Hell is.

So he showed him Heaven,

turned up to eleven.

And told him, "Forget what a cell is!"

First and foremost, I’m going to stay a devoted Thommy fan, though. :)

[sagestreet]

Thommy limerick XIII

A lady moved back once from France,

to watch Jimmy Kent in mid-prance.

But then, when she crept,

downstairs where he slept,

a man had him locked in a dance.

[sagestreet]

A Christmas Question

Did you ever whistle like so,

whilst hanging up green mistletoe?

And were caught off guard,

when there in the yard,

a footman gave kissing a go?

Did you ever stare at the snow,

- the Abbey all happy, aglow, -

but you did not trust him,

you said, "It's just lust, Jim,"

and got rather soused on Bordeaux?

Did you ever cut down a tree,

at dusk right before you had tea?

And dragged it inside,

where you did collide,

with someone who cried, "I love thee,"?

Did you then at last find your faith,

that gone was that horrid cold wraith

of that age-old scandal?

Did you light a candle,

in light and in love him to bathe?

[sagestreet]

Thommy limerick XII

There once was a valet called Ethan,

who made Thomas gasp and stop breathin'.

But when Jimmy found,

them fooling around,

he struck out and kicked Ethan's teeth in.

[sagestreet]

Thommy limerick XI

There once was a young man called Jim,

who sometimes could be rather dim.

But once he worked out,

what he was about,

he knew what he wanted in him.

[sagestreet]

Thommy limerick X

This one was inspired by this brilliant gif of Mrs Hughes eating.

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There once was a lady called Hughes,

who never did need any cues.

She grabbed Mr Green,

and ripped out his spleen,

and ate it her bouche to amuse.

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[sagestreet]

Thommy limerick IX

(For tara.)

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There once was a thing no one digs,

called Derek, the King of all wigs.

Young Jimmy once nicked it,

spat on it and kicked it,

and fed it to Grantham's new pigs.

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