#thoughts on ableism

[broletariats-unite]

High standards of hygiene are ableist. I was reminded of this when my [neurodivergent but v mainstream] roommate commented that infrequent showering was "gross".

There are many, many reasons people struggle with hygiene. Depression, psychosis, body dysmorphia, or gender dysphoria get in the way for some. For others, the bathtub or shower is a trigger. Those who require mobility aids, have decreased flexibility due to frequent dislocations, suffer from fatigue, fall frequently, or have other detrimental physical symptoms may not be able to perform tasks such as brushing their hair or teeth or washing themselves without assistance.

Hear me when I say that struggling to keep up with hygiene does not make you "gross". I shower once or twice a week and only manage to brush my teeth about every other day. I sometimes forget to do laundry or change my sheets. Despite this, I don't smell bad, I wash my hands regularly, and I'm not any more likely to transmit germs to my loved ones.

For some, hygiene is self care. For others it is a chore. For still others it is a distant goal. It is none of your business why someone struggles with hygiene or takes infrequent showers. And it should not be a source of shame for people who do so.

[fairestmusesismoving]

It’s not worth hiding under a cut. I really thought the Disney RPC was gonna be a nice secondary home since Once Upon a Time RPC is dead and often preoccupied with shipping things that made me whip out medication and an inhaler. You know... We’d call that a trigger since it’s traumatic or medical related. Pretty important when people don’t tag that since that could cause immediate harm to me. Notice that designation. Anyway... The ableist slurs and other use of ableism to harass people is so upsetting that I’m keeping track of who to block and blacklist because the posts are so reprehensible. You can’t explain away these terms. Honestly, I’m surprised to see them on tumblr. I’d expect this from my sixty-eight-year-old uncle. It’s some serious “okay boomer” behavior out of tumblr. While none of these actions have been directed at me, I still have to protect myself and also show that these things are not to be tolerated. If I observe this behavior towards others, then I must assume that I would be next. I cannot trust people who do this. These things do disrupt my ability to rp because I now have to figure out how to protect myself. This is my every day life. It shouldn’t have to follow me onto tumblr. This is very unfortunate. Sorry to make this post and clutter up my “pretty blog”, but this is also to say I’ve been tinkering with some adjustments all around in order to reflect these experiences and other things. Thanks for being patient with me during this time. Happy Holidays. That Mun on Fire

[strangesmallbard]

i was just reading that post about the little boy who sends a robot to school so he's able to go to school and how people are reacting like "omg lucky!"

and it reminded me of my own experiences in middle school. because of my arthritis, which was much worse when i was middle school and being treated with enbrel injections, i couldn't run the mile. i could walk the mile, and even then i was allowed to stop if i was feeling too fatigued or achy. this of course led to classmates saying things like "why does she get to stop" or "you're so lucky!" and eventually my pe teacher at the time devised a plan for me to swim instead of running the mile, because it was much better for my joints and overall health. 

but of course that just escalated the remarks when my classmates came back sweaty and tired and i'd come back with freshly washed hair and i just wanted to be like "fine, you want to be able to swim? take my fucking arthritis then. take the twice a week injections. i'm fine with trading running a mile and not having this constant divide between me and my class because of a chronic illness i have no control over." 

in elementary school, literally my entire class (i went to a small school, so there weren't many) knew about my arthritis. and it really did cause a divide because until everyone matured i was the Weird Kid With a Disease. and i was really excited to get to highschool where i could tell people on my own terms, and along with my arthritis getting better, highschool was a lot better in this field. also friends that did know were more mature and understood when i was having a shitty fatigue and ache filled day.

this derails a little bit but i was thinking about this project i had to do in middle school called the "sensitivity project." it was essentially, you had to pretend to have a physical disability or live in poverty to gain empathy for people with either. which, in retrospect, had good intentions but was carried out problematically because it a) separated them as different people to be pitied in a harmful way that actual perpetuated some ableist thought it was trying to counteract, and b) discounted for the fact that there could people in the class actually living those things. i realized this issue as a twelve-year-old however and took the time to educate my classmates on arthritis so i would stop being treated like the Weird Kid With a Disease, but i don't think it helped. also i've realized now that even though ableism has and is still affecting me, i've also had some ingrained ableist thoughts that i'm trying to unlearn and break away from.