#time passed

[dragonnon]

subtle detail of his hair being longer and messier.

[bibboems]

enough time has passed

it’s a nice day today.

the sun shines through the doubles glass doors, lighting my life with a warm glow that was missed in the winter months, yet despite it i choose to stay in the cold corner of the house; keep myself and the mirrors covered, perceived by no one. i haven’t had sex in a decade to the day.

the birds may sing outside my window, but the rot inside my soul stays dormant - fermenting; making my skin fizz, bubble and sting at the slightest hint of a peace offering from the universe - my body keeping a scoreboard of a decade's long misfortune, a body once soft now a museum of all of my sins.

i live through the bad days in slow motion - a ticking time bomb now hijacked to my heart, i sit and wait in anticipation for it to finish me off. rumours of good days ahead fill my phone and on my calendar, with no energy to see them through.

ten years.

ten years of waiting for this ancient ache in me to dull; ten years of loose eyelashes that fall into my cusped hands, ten years of deciding fight or flight when i smell his aftershave. ten years of wondering what i ever did to deserve it, ten years of blaming myself for it, ten years of asking 'why'.

ten years.

the time passed regardless of it all. the universe does not care to wait for me to catch my breath, just for a moment.

ten more years.

the time will pass anyway.

[daisiesonafield-blog]

Hey there! What fic is this post about??? I would like to check it out!

https://at.tumblr.com/daisiesonafield-blog/700200650681810944/ph89umwhxbnn

Hi dear,

Oh it's called Time Passed. One of my all time faves!!! HIGHLY recommend it! It's in my top 2!

Time Passed by coffinofachimera 66K

Louis struggles with their relationship as Harry grows into his identity.

Read here

Note: related to this

[royal1asset-if]

Memories Bring Back Memories

So exam is done me and my classmates decided to celebrate for making out of hell's week but even though the mood is jolly and everyone is happy, I can't shake the feeling of sadness for my old friends before the lockdown happened and the pain is that you make friends but in the end you and your friends have different lives and that the two of you will drift apart.

I mean I was Gr.10 before lockdown happened and me and my friend gave our farewells hoping that we can still meet tomorrow but that was the last time we saw each other.

So I wanna make a poem for our old friends out there before the lockdown may it be our elementary, childhood, high school or work friends.

Why so glum friend I cannot seem to comprehend

Uh? Of course we will meet again

You and I have the same brain

Those were his last words

Which made my heart stirred

My eyes became blurry with tears

Because this is one of my fears

I wish for one last time

But I shall wait intime

For our reunion

For you are my best companion

[suesheroll]

A Time Passed reading of Little Freak

This is just meant to be some fun, not to be taken super srsly. It’s just my opinion on the inspirations behind the song if Time Passed Harry had written it. Not gonna analyse all the lyrics, just a few.

Obvs when I say Louis and Harry here, I mean the fic characters.

Little freak, you Jezebel

This would be the general perception of people who don’t conform to society’s norms being called freaks and could also allude to Harry’s preferences in bed with the lingerie and dirty talk earning him the affectionate moniker of little freak from his partner.

Jezebel would be a direct allusion to “her” and how she, in the form of a she-devil, is inextricably linked to the freak he feels like and the freak he is in bed.

Starry haze, crystal ball

Somehow, you've become some paranoia

It’s like young Harry was trying to look into his future through a crystal ball, trying to predict the path it would take by the stars. He was just trying to see if “she” will become a reality for him or just remain a looming paranoia to hide for the rest of his life with the word paranoia instantly bringing to mind the connotations of something to hide and something to dread. He hid “her” from Louis and dreaded everyday he couldn’t be “her”.

A wet dream just dangling

But your gift is wasted on me

The kind of sex Harry does want to have seems so within reach, he could’ve just told Louis the lingerie was a kink for him and they could’ve made it work. But it wasn’t a mere kink for him, Harry wanted the full experience of having sex according to his gender identity, he couldn’t bear with diluting the truth to get just a bit of the satisfaction. He wanted to be known, to be intimate, to be accepted.

The word gift is so polarising from the word paranoia that you see his warring perspectives on how he may view his gender. Contempt and euphoria battling it out with each other. And it’s as if he says to “her” that her gift of femininity, of the indescribable feeling of not quite fitting into a man, is a gift that he isn’t allowed to appreciate right now while half of his mind shoves him back into the skin suit of adult male.

Paranoia

Gift

I was thinkin' about who you are

Your delicate point of view

I was thinkin' about you

An eternity of thinking it over again and again, of researching and watching YouTube videos and reading articles. All he’s done is thought about and through her “delicate point of view”. His world completely changed, his demeanour towards Louis changes, when he’s looking at life through her delicate point of view and that’s all he wants.

I spilled beer on your friend, I'm not sorry

In the fic I definitely got the feeling that there were points where Harry resented Louis for not accepting “her” even though he hadn’t discussed “her” with him yet and there are then so many moments where Harry is so overwhelmed by the thoughts in his head that he lashes out at Louis. Again and again. And there are so many points where he doesn’t regret jabbing him, bitterness swirling through him. These jabs are the beer he spilled on the man “she” is in love with and wants a relationship with.

Tracksuit and a ponytail

You hide the body all that yoga gave you

I think nothing sums up this lyric better than excerpt from the fic itself.

And they just stand there, content with the close proximity. Louis taking his body in. His pecs, his arms, his shoulders, his bulge. Check. Check. Check. Check. Check. "Well that's good, that's good." He follows Harry's line of conversation too late. Hands on his waist. "You should feel good." And he asks his tummy, "Do you like it?"

Harry gets that goofy smile, making a face. "I mean… yeah. Sure. I think."

"Well everyone gets a bit insecure, yeah?" This time told to his face. Soft, strong. "That's all."

"Mm."

Louis raises his brows.

"Yeah." And Harry laughs, gripping his shorts so tight his knuckles are white.

Red wine and a ginger ale

But you would make fun of me, for sure

Another excerpt

Didn’t cross his mind at all on that bed when Harry was pulling open his hotel bathrobe and revealing a black lingerie set clinging skimpy on him, barely covering his balls. Louis thought it was ridiculous. Harry must have been joking.

Here the you does remind me of Louis and his initial reaction to Harry’s foray into his gender expression which was of silent ridicule because he didn’t understand it at all. And in the other sense, reading some of these parts just feel like “her” mocking Harry for going to every length possible to get Louis’ and his own acceptance except through actually talking about it.

I disrespected you

Jumped in feet first and I landed too hard

A broken ankle, karma rules

You never saw my birthmark

This verse just brings to mind the beginning of the fic where Harry suddenly brought new elements into his Louis’ sex life like lingerie and calling his asshole a pussy only to be faced with discomfort and borderline ridicule from Louis. He jumped off the deep end when showing his gender identity to his partner and ended up drowning for a while.

Louis squeezed at the empty fabric of that B-cup bra the whole time, feeling stupid, knowing by the way Harry squeezed his wrist that he loved it. Loved it, loved it.

Just thinkin' about you

Just thinkin' about you

In summation, I think I’ve irreparably hurt myself by listening to this song obsessively for a month but I don’t regret it. Little Freak is the official soundtrack for this fic, idc idc.

Oh and this song was written and recorded in Japan where TimePassedrry did most of his gender soul searching so even the real Harry said Time Passed rights ok?

Inspired by Time Passed by coffinofachimera

[rainbowbeanstyles]

"Harry Styles is mad. Harry Styles is…Jesus, I'm getting fucking sick of hearing that."

"Your name?" I don't. Wouldn't that be a stupid thing to say? Louis keeps quiet.

"It's not mine anymore, is it. It's a fucking brand. And… I'm bad… for my own, like… business." It makes Harry's brow twitch. "Which is my life. Now. This is what it is. I don't know…"

time passed by coffinofachimera🥺

[polaroidlouis]

Time Passed by coffinofachimera @belialsmiracles

Louis struggles with their relationship as Harry grows into his identity.

alternatively, a crisis over a bra and mixed signals