tinyparlancer replied to your post:
Guy from the date on Saturday messaged me and...
Eh, lack of attraction is lack of attraction, and being demi doesn’t negate that. If you don’t even feel interest… It’s true that first meetings can be thwarted by jitters getting in the way of good conversation, but don’t feel obliged to go for round 2 if it was actually exhausting for you. Unless you feel from his online conversation that you might get along well and it could have been just a not good date - then by all means give it one more shot to see if things improve. But don’t feel bad
We’ve hardly had any online conversation. Just discussing meeting. I’d have felt more comfortable before Saturday tbh with some online banter so that I could gage his humour - or lack of it.
I think he was very nervous, as was I, and he definitely improved over the course of the time we spent together. By the end we were talking freely. But I was very consciously aware of trying very hard. I made him laugh a lot - I’m a funny person!!!! - but he didn’t make me laugh very much and he liked telling me lots of things I didn’t really care about but I pretended I did. But maybe I would have cared about them if I cared about the person telling me??? But there’s a vicious circle with this online dating thing! How can you care about a person when you don’t care about what they’re saying - and how can you care about what they’re saying if you don’t care about them???
(I’m talking neutral things here, like about his job; I’m not trying to say that I never care about anything anyone ever tells me unless I have a deep emotional bond with them!)
Like, you’re trying to acquire things in common but in a totally fake environment. It JUST. DOES. NOT. WORK.
I mean, clearly it does for a lot of people who form relationships from internet dating.
But it just doesn’t ring true for me.