#tlou joel

[kenobiwanx]

wip of oc being sandwiched by joel and arthur bc why not?

[loveletters2cowboys]

Yes, Father

Pairings: Priest! Joel Miller x reader

Summary: Father Miller finds your vibrator while doing dorm inspections and makes you use it while confessing your sins.

Warning: MDNI (18+), free use, improper use of rosary, use of stainless steel vibrating dildo, oral (f!recieving) mock sympathy, dub-con, orgasm denial, pussy slaps, priest Joel, priest kink, condescending praises, praise kink,overstimulation,vaginal stretching, asshole stretching, anal gaping, corruption kink, degradation, objectification, power imbalance, cum-eating, triple stimulation, rosary insertion, age gap, grumpy Joel, improper use of Bible verses, getting shamed for human nature, overstimulation, masturbation, use of pet name (little lamb), dacryphilia(mild), Boston QZ Joel, JOEL IS IN LATE 40S, READER IS IN MID 20S, internal stimulation, external stimulation, Joel is a perverted, internal penetration, external penetration, TENSION. (READ AUTHOR’S NOTE)

Author’s Note: Hello guys, I just wanted to add a disclaimer that my blogs do not reflect how JOEL MILLER acts in the series nor game. Sorry if this is unrealistic, I do not know much about the Catholic religion and I do not want to seem disrespectful to it. I just saw a priest Joel picture on pinterest and this idea came to mind. If the smut in this one-shot is too disrespectful I do not have a problem with taking this story down. I really hope you enjoy it! Sorry for any typos or errors, English isn't my first language and this is not edited. LISTEN TO TEACHER’S PET FOR THE FIRST PART AND YOUR GIRL BY LANA DEL REY FOR THE SECOND PART.

Word Count: 6.4k

The scrape of chairs echoed throughout the classroom as Father Miller gathered the stack of graded quizzes from the corner of his desk. He thumbed through the papers before clearing his throat. “Before I let y'all go,” Father Miller began, his deep southern drawl rough with effortless authority. “Here’s your results from last week’s quiz.”

You barely paid attention to him. You dragged the tip of your pen across the edge of your notebook, doodling meaningless swirls while you rested your cheek against your palm. He walked between the rows of desks, placing each paper down against the wooden desks.

You hated being at an all-girls Catholic university;every hour of every day seemed to be dictated by someone else. There were mandatory religion courses, weekly chapel attendance and curfews in the residence halls and enough rules to make you question whether you were an adult or a child. Every mistake felt like it carried the weight of failure instead of it simply being human nature.

Most of the students here seemed to thrive on this campus. They volunteered for campus ministry, answered Father Miller’s questions before he even finished asking them and somehow always looked excited to discuss scripture.

But for you, you counted the minutes until class ended because religion wasn't your strongest subject to begin with. Father Miller’s course required you to memorize historical context and essays that connected scripture to everyday life. Every assignment and quiz asked questions that were impossible to answer.

The polished leather of Father Miller’s boots halted right beside your desk before your quiz landed in front of you with a loud smack.

You softly flinched as you briskly looked up at his towering frame. Your gaze settled on Joel’s captivating face, watching as his lips pressed together with a quiet disapproval written on his expression.

Father Miller rested two fingers on the paper before gradually sliding them across the paper with the failing grade. This disappointing bold 35% stared back at you from the top of the page.

“Stay after class.” Father Miller ordered as his dark eyes held you in place. “We need to have a serious talk.”

“Okay.” You quietly said while straightening your posture against the rigid plastic of the chair.

His jaw flexed almost unnoticeably before he continued down the row.

You let out a slow breath as you lowered your gaze down to the paper. You weren't even surprised that Father Miller placed another failed quiz onto your desk but it would only be a matter of time before you are put on a strict academic probation.

The university made it painfully clear that students were required to maintain a minimum GPA and pass every required religion course. Father Miller’s class was mandatory and If your grade didn’t improve soon, you could lose your place at the university altogether if it stayed where it was.

The realization settled heavily in your chest as you fidgeted with the pen before dropping it in the center of your notebook.

The room was loaded with chatter as girls whispered excitedly, comparing their passing grades to each other.

Father Miller eventually returned to the front of the room, setting the remaining quizzes down before clasping his calloused hands together.

“That’s all for today.” He declared while unhurriedly sweeping his gaze across the classroom. “Remember to read Romans before next Monday.”

The room resumed into conversation as backpacks zipped shut and chairs scraped across the aged wooden floors. Within a few minutes, the classroom emptied until it was only the two of you that remained.

You swallowed the lump of uncertainty forming in your throat as you continually glanced at the failing grade, pretending not to notice Father Miller watching you. He quietly strolled to the classroom’s door and pulled it closed behind the last student.

You gathered your notebook before carrying it to the front, choosing the chair directly across from his desk.

The latch of the door finally clicked as a comfortless silence evolved in the room. He walked back over to his desk but he didn't sit down. Instead, he leaned against the edge of his desk while folding his muscle-shielded arms across his broad chest, his biceps unintentionally flexing under the tight fabric of his shirt.

“You know…”Father Miller paused as if he was searching for the right words to say. “Faith without discipline doesn't get many things accomplished.” His gaze remained on you, watching as you nervously crossed your legs over each other.

You didn’t reply as you lowered your gaze to your skirt-covered thighs.

“You never turn assignments in on time.” He started. “You fail every test I put in front of you.” He gestured toward the quiz sitting on your notebook. “You are late to my lectures then spend the next hours looking out the window like a lost puppy.”

“It’s nothing.” You shamefully mumbled as your damp palms found their way to the cotton of your plaid skirt.

“It ain't nothing?” He repeated in a condescending tone as his eyes narrowed slightly at you. “Sister Rena caught you in the back of the garden smoking instead of being in my class.”

Your fingers instinctively tightened around the material of your skirt as heat crept up your neck. There wasn't much you could debate on because he was accurate about everything he was stating.

Father Miller studied you before letting out a heavy breath through his nose.

Father Miller studied your face for another moment before letting out a quiet breath through his nose. He then glanced at the silver watch around his thick wrist while looking back at you.

“If you don't want to talk now, that is fine.” He said, his voice remained calm but there was enough firmness behind it to make you shift in your seat. “But things aren't looking too good for you if this keeps up, little lamb.” He added before pushing himself off from the desk.

“It won't happen again.” The words slipped off your tongue snappier than you planned.

He halted after he started walking to the chalkboard, offering you an extended stare. “I’ve heard that one before.” He stated, his voice sounding severely dissatisfied. He brought his attention to the blackboard before picking up the dry-eraser.

The tension between the two of you came back as you didn't reply. Father Miller slowly rubbed the felt eraser against the board, removing any remaining chalk marks. “Actions have consequences.”

Your heart forgot its rhythm as he turned back to you after placing the eraser back down. “I’ll be in the chapel this afternoon.” He said before gradually strolling up to you, his hands sliding into the pockets of his dark trousers. “I want you there.”

“Okay, Father…”You said in a quiet response as you gathered your belongings and hastily rose from the chair.

Father Miller stepped right in front of you, his commanding frame towering over you and blocking you from being able to exit the narrow row between the desk.

He was so near you that you could almost feel his warmth radiating on your prickled skin.

“And when you come, you better have an honest reason for why you’re failing my class.” He said as his darkened green eyes pierced through your soul. Before you could reply, he stepped out of your way and proceeded to pick up textbooks from some of the desks, signaling that the conversation was over.

You slipped the straps of your backpack over your shoulders and strolled away to the door, eager to put as much distance between you and this hell of a classroom. You gathered your notebook and slid the failing quiz between its pages before quietly stuffing everything into your backpack.

You barely made it to the door before his deep voice prompted you to stop. “One more thing, little lamb.” He said but paused when you started to slowly turn around to face him.

Father Miller’s eyes lowered from your face to the hem of your uniform skirt while placing the textbooks onto the dense wooden shelves.

He let out a low sigh before pinching the bridge of his scarred nose, as if he was already tired of having to say it. “That skirt’s too short.” Disgrace sat in his controlling tone.

“It shrunk in the wash,” You explained under your breath as your hands flew to the back of your thighs, instinctively tugging the fabric lower.

A skeptical hum came out of him, telling you he didn't believe a word from you. “Get it fixed before Sister Mary writes you up.”He ordered, his presence so powerful that it made you squirm.

“I will.”

For a brief second, Father Miller raised his eyebrows in wonder before nodding once and dragging his attention back to the books on the shelf.

Without hesitation, you slipped out into the hallway, already knowing you’d spend the rest of the day wondering why his opinion about your skirt had embarrassed you far more than the failing grade ever did.

⊱ ─── ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ ─── ⊰

With a reluctant sigh, you halted in front of the aged wooden doors, chewing on your lip as you rehearsed explanations in your head.

The heavy wooden doors groaned when you pushed them open. Warm air drifted over your body, carrying the familiar scent of old wood, melted candle wax and incense. The sunset filtered through the stained-glass windows, scattering collars across the wooden floor.

Father Miller stood near the altar with his back toward you, he seemed deep in thought until the door clicked shut behind you.

“You are late, little lamb.” He said as he turned his attention to you, his Southern drawl echoed through the empty chapel.

You swallowed and began strolling up the center aisle, your shoes clicking against the floor with every slow step. “Sorry, I had something to turn in.” Father Miller watched you approach without saying another word.

When you finally stopped a few feet away, he brought his eyes toward the door of the chapel before looking back at you.

“I spoke with Sister Mary.” He said before clearing his throat as sliding his hands into the pockets of his dress trousers.

You blinked up at him as you awkwardly shifted your weight; your heart was hammering against your rib cage.

“They are discussing removing you from the university.” He said as he took a few steps closer to you, his tall frame towering over you.

“What…no…” You breathed out as your shoulders immediately sagged as the reality settled in.

“I asked her to hold off.” He chimed in before you spiraled.

You halted as you pulled your eyebrows together in perplexity, searching his face. His eyebrows remained furrowed, deepening the creases of irritation on his face. “Why?” You inquired.

“Because I see a great potential in you.” His sentences caught you off guard. You expected disappointment, especially when coming from him. Instead his tone held something almost reassuring under his sternness. “Every one of your professors speaks highly of you.” He trailed off as he shook his head slightly. “You pass those classes without much trouble.” He continued as he proceeded with motioning over to the altar, his fingertips brushing along the wooden edge.

“So why are you failing mine?” He raised the question, stopping beside the altar.

Your mouth opened but an answer refused to come out. Every last explanation you had spent all afternoon rehearsing vanished under his intense gaze.

Father Miller waited, slightly tilting his head as his tongue poked against the inner flesh of his cheek. A sigh escaped him before he nodded to himself. “Still don't have a reason?” He questioned as he leaned against the altar, not once taking his eyes off of you.

“No Father.” You quietly answered as you brought your attention back down to your Mary Janes to avoid his gaze pinning you.

As an uncomfortable silence evolved in the room, he clicked his tongue while narrowing his eyes at you. “Is there something you’d like to confess?”

“No…” You said, the words almost came out as a whisper.

“That’s right?” He challenged.

You gave him a single nod before bringing your hands into each other, fidgeting with your fingers as heat crept up your neck.

Neither of you spoke for a brief moment resulting in the silence in the chapel to stretch; the only thing audible was the faint ticking of an old clock near the entrance.

“Okay.” He simply replied before leaning off of the altar and making his way to the small oak table beside it.

Every muscle in your body relaxed as you thought the worst of the conversation might finally be over.

Your eyes followed him as he opened one of the chipped wooden drawers, humming in amusement. When Father Miller pulled out your stainless-steel vibrator that was precisely molded into the shape of a small cock, your heart nearly dropped.

He held it between his fingers before darting his gaze back at you. “Now…”He muttered as he slowly turned it over, examining it beneath the warm light of the chapel. “If sister Mary was the one doing dorm inspections instead of me…”

“I bought it as a joke.” You blurted out as embarrassment flooded through your veins.

Father Miller stopped examining the steel vibratorto dart his attention to you. “You bought it as a joke?” He echoed your explanation before huffing a humorless laugh.

“Yes Father.” You replied as you nodded quickly.

“Then explain why it was hidden in the back of your dresser.” He said, the doubtful look across his features made it clear he wasn't convinced.

Your fingers picked nervously at the edge of your sleeve, not being able to think of anything to say.

“You're lucky that I was the one assigned to inspect your room.”Father Miller said while stepping closer to you, toying with the vibrator against his large palm. His thumb brushed over the flared end that had the button for the vibrator settings as he gave you a long look.

“Have you been using it?” He asked as the pad of his finger ghosted over the button in interest.

“No.” You breathed out in unwillingness, finally drifting your attention away from his glance.

“Look at it.” He mumbled as his eyes immediately returned to yours, waiting for you to obey.

At his demand, your gaze naturally dropped toward the faint stains marking the stainless steel.

“It’s all stained so don't lie to me.” He lifted the vibrator up to your face, forcing you to take a better look at the series of dull stains left behind from your cunt’s juices excessively leaking on it. “Because when you stand in the chapel and lie, you ain't just lying to me.” He elucidated while glancing briefly toward the crucifix above the altar.

“I used it….” You hesitated before admitting the truth. “I got tempted and gave in anyway.”

Father Miller nodded, as if he’d expected you to eventually tell him the truth. He didn't reply immediately, he just brought his other hand to his trimmed beard, skimming the tip of his fingers against the hairs that streaked with grey.

“Temptation’s real,” He broke the silence, his rough draw carrying a calmness you hadn't heard from him once all semester. “But you have to learn how to respond when it comes.” Father Miller said as his fingers continued to toy with the steel.

“I know I failed.” You said.

“You did, little lamb.” He replied, the bluntness made your lips press together. “That's where repentance comes in and you acknowledge what you did and take responsibility for it.” He said as he gestured the toy towards you. “Use it.”

“What?” You asked as you blinked up at him in astonishment, your tone lower than aimed for it to be.

“Go on.”He closed the small distance between the two of you before reaching for one of your hands and placing the cold, rigid steel in your damp palm.

“Father in front of you?” You question too stunned to process what you’d just heard as your hands clutched around the shaft of the small molded cock.

“Yes.” He replied. “Like I said, the first step is acknowledgement.”

You looked up at him for a second, swallowing hard beneath his gaze before forcing yourself toward the table.

Father Miller tracked your every movement as you leaned against the wood. A surge of shame coursed through you before you unhurriedly brought the toy up to your lips. You spat right on the tip, making your warm saliva evenly blanket the steel.

Father Miller rubbed his thumb against his knuckles as he watched your smooth lips wrap around the toy.

You lapped your tongue around the steel tip before welcoming the toy entirely into your mouth. A soft gag escaped your throat as the cock bullied the back of your throat. You then bobbed your head against the toy causing a ring of saliva to form at the corner of your mouth.

After a few moments, you pulled back until only your mouth suctioned against the rigid tip. While Father Miller’s gaze scorched against your sweaty skin as you eventually dragged it from between your lips, a line of saliva connected you to the toy.

You halted as you looked up at him through your lashes, waiting for his judgment.

“That’s all?” He asked. “Do you think I was born yesterday?”

“No Father..” Though the air was incredibly warm in the chapel, goosebumps still managed to prickle across your skin. You slid into the edge of the table before setting both feet at each corner of the table without another word.

From the angle you spread out in, your skirt had no choice but to hike up your body, pooling around the small of your waist. Father Miller’s eyes traveled down your body before pausing right between your thighs. Your underwear was wet; a darkened line from your slick ran down the center of the cotton, pathetically revealing your arousal.

You heard his breath caught in his chest as you eventually peeled the damp cotton to the side, uncovering your glistening pussy. Your fingers rested on the flared end of the toy, switching on the vibration settings. Without hesitation, the steel started vibrating, a low buzz reverberating in the air. You swallowed the lump forming in your throat as you looked down at your damp mess of a cunt before delicately running the cold tip against your lips. You lazily circled the toy around your swollen bud, prompting your hips to instinctively buckle from the mild vibrating stimulation. Your body responsively stiffened as the low vibrations of the steel cock buzzed against your cunt.

Your breath evolved into unsteady patterns as you unhurriedly brought the wand up to your swollen bud, the low vibration buzzed directly on the nerve. A breathy whimper left your lips as the continuous vibrations sent a knot to construct in your lower stomach.

You immediately knew you weren’t going to last long.

You never did.

Father Miller stood there with a sharp unreadable expression, watching you nurse your perfect pussy.

You threw your head back in euphoria as a soft moan rolled off your tongue. You pressed the tip of the toy firmer against your clit, craving more of the vibration it was providing to your throbbing point.

The ecstatic sensation in your lower belly continued to build rapidly. You whimpered out a breath that was caught in your chest as you rubbed the wet steel around the sensitive nerve.

You slowly proceeded to drag the tip away from your swollen clit and towards the entrance of your clenching pussy. Your face creased in pleasure as the desire in you burned like a rapid fire. Your legs quivered as the vibration against your entrance forced thick fluids to leak out of you and coat the oak table.

“Is…is this enough, Father Miller?”You choked out as you pressed the tip against your hole; the tightness of your walls refused to make the toy go in any further than the tip.

“Does it feel like enough?” He raised a question, his deep Southern drawl rough as he took a few steps forward. He halted between your legs as his gaze lowered to your cunt forming a creamy ring around the head of the toy already.

You blinked up at him with parted lips as longing flushed over you, tempting you to push the toy deeper into you. In an instant, your eyes widened as you yelped at the foreign stinging sensation.

You never inserted the toy before.

Sweat began rolling down your neck as your chest heaved laboriously. You steadily plunged the vibrating toy deeper into your hungry cunt, too eager to give your walls a moment to adjust to the new stretch.

Father Miller’s calloused hands found their way to the back of your thighs in silence, spreading your legs further apart. The warm air of the chapel fanned against your cunt as the toy now had an opportunity to sink deeper into your tight pussy. His piercing gaze focused on the mess between your legs, attentively monitoring the way your pussy needily swallowed up the entire girth of the steel until only the flared end was visible.

Another severe wave of ecstasy settled low in your stomach as the smooth tip vibrated right against a delicate spot up against your wall. Your trembling legs made an effort to clamp but Father Miller securely held them open.

A puff of air escaped through your nose as your cunt cried from the buzzing stimulation, bringing your thickened fluids to drop down to the table.

You left the toy in you, letting your walls finally mold the shape of the vibrating rigid steel. A breathy squirm escaped your lips as your body constricted and pussy pulsed from how near your orgasm was.

You then trailed your hands up your slick-coated lips, spreading them open until your throbbing clit slightly rose from its hood. You two held eye contact as he dragged his tongue briefly along the inside of his cheek, watching you unravel into a moaning mess.

“Get off the table and bend over.”He ordered sternly, his hands finally loosening their grip on your thigh as he stepped back. “Leave the toy in.”

You quickly obeyed, sliding off the edge of the table before bending over so you were back to being fully exposed to him. Your cheeks burned under his gaze as he gave a brief, approving nod before turning away. A loud moan escaped your lips as the vibration became more potent due to the angle you were in, relentlessly buzzing against the precious, spongy area in you. Your mouth continually fell open as you glanced over your shoulder at him, immediately catching the way his hardened expression settled over his sharp features.

Father Miller then motioned over to the altar before reaching for his wooden rosary then returning to you.

“What is lust, little lamb?” He inquired. “It was one of the many questions you got wrong in the exam.”

“A sin…it’s a sin…” You managed to choke out, not being able to reply to your best advantage because your body was concentrating on chasing your building release.

“We all know that,” He said as he grazed the wooden beads of his rosary over the curve of your back. “Explain why it's a sign.” He mumbled as he hauled it down to the fat of your ass then inner thigh.

“Because it gives you an overpowering craving.” You replied as your walls helplessly clamped around the vibrating steel. Your hips jerked as he carried the wooden beads through your puffy folds, deliberately coating them in your slick.

“And?” He continued, his tone indicating that he wasn’t too happy with the shortness of your explanation.

“Please…I don't know…” You whimpered.

“How pathetic.” Father Miller tssked before shifting the rosary away from your pussy, halting it right at the rim of your unused asshole. His thumb and the bead ghosted the delicate, clenching flesh before he spat directly on the hole. He then smeared the thickness of his warm saliva around the rim before it had a chance to roll down to your stuffed cunt.

“I’ll tell you why.” He muttered before pressing the wet wood right against your asshole. “It reduces a whole person into a physical object for personal pleasure." He explained before unhurriedly stuffing the first bead into your hole.

The unfamiliar sensation drove your knees to immediately buckle as your untrained hole desperately stretched around the wood, entirely swallowing the bead.

“And it distracts the mind from higher moral and spiritual focus.” He added before pushing another one of the slick-covered beads against your rim, prompting your hole to open up for him.

“Father..”You wailed out in euphoria as your hole frantically created more room for him to fit another one into you. Your rim stung in a pleasurable discomfort as you sank your teeth into your bottom lip, biting back your frequent moans.

“It’s okay, you are taking everything so well.” He cooed as he gently pushed the last few beads in the hole.

You were now full of his rosary beads.

You struggled to stand still as the buildup in your lower stomach was about to release, forcing your walls to frantically spasm in wave-like motions around the vibrator and beads.

“Here’s what I want you to do, little lamb.” He spoke as his eyes lingered on your tightly clenched hands in fulfillment. “Quote every verse you can think of that explains why lust is a sin.” He instructed as his calloused palms slowly guided up the smooth skin of your ass.

His delicate touch sent a jolt of electricity through your body, awakening every nerve within you.

“You need to understand the roots of what you're up against.” He said that when he noticed your tremendous hesitancy.

You clamped your eyes shut as you desperately made an attempt to gather yourself and put your brain to work.

“Well…first..”You let out an audible moan as your nails clawed against the oak table. Your lips remained parted but not another sound was able to come out as your hips jerked from the feeling evolving in you.

“Go on…”

“Matthew 5:28…” You choked out, feeling your juices leak down your inner thigh before saturating the top material of your knee-high socks.

“Mhm?” He attentively hummed before bringing one of his hands in between your quivering thighs and switching the vibrator to the second setting; a mode you never dared to surpass.

You immediately attempted to lean off the table and stand straight but his other hand flew to the middle of your back, firmly pinning you to the hardwood.

“Everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” You rushed out in one extended breath before clamping your thighs shut to ease the excessive pleasure from the dual stimulation.

He immediately gave the inside of your legs a hard nudge, forcing your legs to widen again.

“Is that all your pretty little brain could think of?” He asked, his voice carrying a dry, condescending edge. A deep, humorless chuckle escaped his mouth as he slowly shook his head. “You know I expect better than that.”

Your heart rate increased as sweat endlessly rolled down your temple. “Galatians 5:19.” you stuttered as you felt the rough pad of his thumb slide between your folds before settling right on your pulsing bud.

“It says the works of the flesh and lust are right at the top, showing it pushes us away from the Spirit." You brainlessly trailed off, trying to come up with the right words as his thumb started delicately circling your throbbing point.

A groan of disappointment came from deep within his chest as he switched the vibrator to the third setting. “It speaks about sexual immorality and impurity but lust specifically isn't the exact word used there.”

In response, you whimpered at the pleasure of the tip of the toy providing continuous vibration to your delicate walls.

“What’s next?”

“Proverbs 6:25.” You breathed out as your hips jolted from his thumb applying excessive pressure to your swollen nerve. “Do not lust in your heart after her beauty or let her captivate you with her eyes.”

Before Father Miller told you if you were right or wrong, you felt the settings switch into a higher vibration. You practically cried out as the euphoric sensation drove every muscle in your body to twitch. Your pussy didn't stand a chance against the deeper wave of vibration patterns.

“It was Job.” He corrected with a quiet note of disturbance as if he couldn't believe he had to explain it again. “One more.”

“Corinthians 6:18.” You replied as your hips instinctively rocked against his thumb. “Flee from sexual immorality…a sexually immoral person sins against their own body.”

“Precise when you’re under pressure, hm?” He taunted, his Southern drawl thick with mockery. He gave your aching clit a few firm slaps, causing your body to almost twist away from his torture on your clit.

“So you can do good when it matters,” he said, tilting his head slightly. “You just choose not to most of the time?” He questioned like he'd just caught you proving his point before pulling away.

A breathy squirm escaped your lips as your body constricted from how intensely your orgasm was about to wash over you. “I'll be good whenever you want.” You blurted, turning mindless as the consistent vibration in you resulted in your body suddenly pulling tight as an arrow. “I'm cumming…forgive me, Father.” You glanced at him like a lost puppy.

“No you aren't, hold it in.” He ordered as he folded his arms across his broad chest. “Show me how much of a good girl you truly can be.” He didn't take his eyes off you as he watched you fight to stay bent over on the table.

“I can't…”You admitted as your moans became labored; your orgasm wasn't slowing down.

“If you cum…you are going to wish you didn't.”He cautioned, planting his rough hands onto your ass. “I’ll make sure to get every last orgasm out of you.” He added before widely spreading your cheeks apart, admiring the creamy mess your pussy was creating.

Your heart hammered against your chest as you forced yourself to count backward in your head so you didn't cum. You confused the numbers while the rush of ecstasy coursed through you.

“And you’re making a damp mess,” Father Miller remarked, his eyes dropping to your juices leaking down to your socks. “Uncleanliness is next to ungodliness, little lamb,” he stated, a faintness of teasing in his voice as he glanced back at you.

Before you could respond, he lowered himself to the floor with a grunt. “Now I’m gonna have to clean you up.”His breath aired against the skin of your thigh before he took a long lick from your inner thighs up to your pulsing nerve ending. The moment his slick-covered tongue began lapping around your swollen clit, you were pushed to your release.

Sweat was dripping off your body as your throbbing cunt clamped tightly from the variety of stimulation.

“I’m so sorry Father…” You repeated your apology in a weak moan as you shamelessly came on his tongue. Your breathing hitched as the euphoria that had piled in your lower stomach finally burst. In an instant, your needy whimpers continually rolled off your tongue as your body went sluggish and legs jerked from the extreme pleasure.

“Obeying is better than sacrifice, I warned you.” He said before leaching his soft lips onto your sensitive clit, not giving your aftershocks a chance to kick in. “Confess.” He grunted between sucks as his hands gripped your hips in a rough hold, inching you closer to his face.

As the vibrations overstimulated you, you hastily brought your hands behind you in an attempt to slide the toy out of your overworked cunt. “Please, too much to handle…i can't.” In response, he held on to your hand, using it as an anchor to bury his face deeper against your pussy.

“Action has consequences when you are disobedient.” He then commented as he pulled back to catch his breath. “So start confessing.”

A guttural moan broke out of your mouth as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your body wriggling away from him. The vibrator continued buzzing in you while Father Miller latched his lips back on you, his mouth following you wherever you twisted to.

As he sucked on you, he flicked his tongue directly on your swollen bud.

“Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.” You cried out as your body tensed at how strongly he was sucking you. “It’s been 7 days since my last confession.”

He groaned against your clit while delivering consistent licks to your bud. Your body twitched against his hot mouth as his beard scraped against your folds.

“I confess my sins of engaging in the act of lust.” You rasped as your legs quivered from another orgasm arriving deep in you. The moans that escaped out your mouth got louder the second he delicately bit down on your clit.

Your walls pathetically clamped down around the steel girth of the toy as the knot in your stomach quickly coiled again.

“I had impure thoughts and gave into the temptation.” You wailed out in bliss before digging your nails into the flesh of your palm.

The sound of your wet cunt gushing against his mouth reverberated through the chapel as he shook his head against your pussy. With that action, you knew you weren't going to last too long.

“I’m greatly sorry.” You gulped as your entire body buckled from the excessive amount of suction he was providing your clit with.

He grunted at the sweet taste of you, shoving you even closer to his lips. You attempted to move away from his touch due to how sensitive you were. Moving didn't do much because of the tough grip on your arm and hip.

His warm saliva saturated between the crevices of your folds as he skillfully feasted on you, repeatedly flicking your bud without any mercy.

“I detest all my sins out of fear of thy punishment.” In daze, you ended the confession as your toes curled from the sensation of him lapping his tongue around your overstimulated clit.

“I absolve you of your sins.” He replied to your confession before creating a strong suction on the nerve.

Your thighs nearly clamped shut again as he devoured your cunt like it was his last meal. Your next orgasm was coming faster than you anticipated. You let out a sob; the triple stimulation ripened a tangle of bliss in you as Father Miller pushed you over your limit.

“Cum for me, little lamb.” He ordered between a suck before flicking his tongue on your aching nerve. “Give me that orgasm.”

“Yes, father.” You strained out as you rocked harder against his face. Your body tightened mightily at the ecstatic release while he circled his tongue around your swollen clit.

Your orgasm hit you like a brick before waves of pleasure crammed into every nerve of your body. Your body went limp as you felt him gradually start to pull the vibrating steel out of your stretched cunt. A sob left your throat as your chest frantically heaved. Every nerve in your body buzzed as your walls spasmed around the wooden beads while the aftershocks came in.

He licked your puffy bud a few kitten licks, helping you ride out your orgasm. When your breathing eventually stabilized, he finally detached his lips from your pussy.

In exhaustion, you rested your head against the oak, blankly blinking at all the empty pews in the chapel as you gradually came down from your high.

From behind you, you heard him switch the vibration settings off before pressing himself right against your sweaty body. Your body stiffened when you felt the girth of his shaft right on your ass. He leaned forward while snaking his hands into your frizz hair, holding it in a loose ponytail. “Clean your mess up.” He instructed as he brought the vibrator that was covered in your thick fluids up to your lips.

You swiftly obeyed his order, wrapping your lips around the steel that was now warm from your body heat. The immediate citrus taste of yourself struck your taste buds as you sucked harder.

You bobbed your head up and down, the tip hitting the back of your throat. He then shoved it deeper into your mouth, earning a gag to escape from your throat. For a few seconds, he kept the toy in your mouth, forcing your mouth to produce an excessive amount of saliva that it started to messily roll down to your chin.

“I expect to see you here every Friday.”

——————————————————————————

Taglist: @strawberrylipglossx , @stargirl331 , @haloramyun , @drabbotsweetheart , @pedrofan , @4ngelarchive , @an5559275555gel @shrewdreader @readerlover-x @alyloops @untamedheart81 @speaktothehandpeasants @k-d--h

[elliviee]

a soft, tender kiss on the nape after he impaled me and bred me (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）

[elliviee]

don't you hate coming back home after hours of being outside and not having a buffed, texan old man waiting for you with dinner already made? and he'd say "hey. how was yer day, hm?" and you'd be like "good but I missed you" and you'd give him a hug and he'd hold you so so close you'd hear his heartbeat and then he'd be like "you eat anythin'?" while already serving stew on a plate for you and you'd be "yeah today was tiring" and he'd take care of everything and after you and him eat together then you'd both go to the room and lay down and watch tv for a while or he'd read aloud for you and then you'd both sleep with him holding you so close and being your big spoon and then...

[loveletters2cowboys]

BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.

Pairings: bfd! joel miller x reader

Summary: You go on a Christmas trip to Wyoming with your boyfriend. The trip takes a wild turn when you end up in his dad’s bed after a heated argument.

Warnings: MDNI (18+), free use, mock sympathy, improper use of underwear, dub-con, breeding kink, condescending praises, praise kink,overstimulation, vaginal stretching, corruption kink, degradation, objectification, biting, power imbalance, age gap, grumpy Joel x sunshine reader, panty sniffing, panty licking, discharge licking, cum-eating, voyeurism, getting shamed for cheating, guilt, regret, overstimulation, masturbation, somnophilia (mild), Jackson Joel, CHEATING, JOEL IS IN LATE 40S, READER IS IN MID 20S, internal stimulation, external stimulation, Joel is a perverted, lying, arguing, mutual pining (ish), cream pie, internal penetration, external penetration, p in v, morally gray Joel, forced proximity, adultery, TENSION, time skips (PLEASE READ AUTHOR’S NOTE)

Author’s note: The smut in this one-shot is wildly extreme, if you are sensitive to the topics in the warnings please click off this post now. To those who are staying, read at your own risk. I just wanted to add a disclaimer that my blogs do not reflect how JOEL MILLER acts in the series nor game. I really hope you enjoy and sorry for any typos or errors, English isn't my first language. Sorry for the wait. LISTEN TO TRASH MAGIC OR BE MY DADDY BY LANA DEL REY WHILE READING.

Word Count: 10.2k

The entire flight to Jackson left your stomach in a tight knot of anxiousness. For Christmas break, Sam, your boyfriend of one year, had insisted that you come along on his annual trip to Wymoing. He went up north every year to spend Christmas with his dad, who lived in a cabin right outside of Jackson. From what you’d heard from Sam, he moved to Jackson right after the divorce with Sam’s mom was finalized.

Sam disappearing into the woods to stay with his dad had been their holiday tradition since Sam was in middle school. However, this year, Sam decided it was finally time for you to meet his dad after he spent most of the summer and Thanksgiving with your family.

“I think this is a bad idea,” You admitted while adjusting the strap of your carry-on against your shoulder, wincing at the weight digging into your skin. You glanced at Sam as you followed him through the crowded airport terminal, a surge of nervousness running through your veins. Since your alarm clock went off this morning, your mind’s been racing on if his dad was going to like you.

Sam didn’t even look up from his phone as the two of you finally made your way to baggage claim. “You’ve said that six times.” He muttered as his thumbs mindlessly rolled against the screen of the phone. In defeat, your tensed shoulders dropped at how dismissive he was to you.

As his suitcase came around the corner, he casually reached toward the conveyor belt. "There's no reason to be nervous," Sam then said before pulling the large suitcase towards himself and rolling it on the floor.

“You don’t understand," You immediately said while also leaning over the belt as your suitcase appeared. “This is your Christmas tradition.” You reached for your suitcase before tugging it towards yourself with all the strength you had.

Sam sighed loudly as if you were personally exhausting him.

“You invite me without even asking your dad then wait until the night before to tell me!” You reminded him, straightening up with a huff.

As he adjusted the handle of his suitcase, he finally glanced over at you. “Joel is going to love you.” He said while pocketing his phone.

“You can’t speak his mind.” You scoffed.

“He’s my dad; I sure can.” Sam replied without uncertainty before walking towards the exit.

“Since the day I’ve met you, all you’ve talked about was how impossible he was to deal with,” You said while briskly catching up to him.

“He’s just grumpy.” Sam let out a snort before shrugging one shoulder, wanting the frequent conversation about his dad to come to an end.

The closer you got to the airport exit, the quicker your heart seemed to forget its rhythm. The automatic doors slid open for the both of you, sending a wave of the cold Wyoming air to steal the breath out of your lungs.

A sharp gust swept across the arrival area pushing you to instinctively tug your jacket tighter around your waist. You took in the unfamiliar white landscape stretching across the airport as Sam glimpsed down at his phone.

“He’s here.” Sam spoke before lifting a hand in greeting. He strolled towards an aged truck that was idling near the curb, the engine loudly rumbling.

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat as you struggled to catch up with his long strides, your suitcase wheels bumping unevenly over the pavement.

Before you could fully reach the truck, the driver’s door swung open to the sight of Sam’s dad climbing out of the truck.

He looked exactly like every story Sam had told you about him.

He was a towering frame with a shield of muscles that were strictly built from decades of hard labor. Thick brunette curls streaked with grey at his temples.A neatly trimmed beard framed his sharp jaw and a pale scar cut across the bridge of his nose. Deep lines sat around his eyes and a permanent crease lived between his brows, like the world had been irritating him for decades.

Without intention, your steps slowed as you took a moment to stare at the rugged man.

“Sam boy!” His dad then called out, his deep southern voice thick against the cold air. A small grin evolved on the corner of his full lips as he closed the distance between them.

He pulled Sam into a rough, one-armed hug, delivering him a firm pat on the back before letting go. “Finally good to see you.” Joel said while taking a few steps back to analyze his son.

“You too.” Sam cheerfully replied.

“You look tired, Sammie.” Joel stated as he slanted his head while slightly squinting his dark green eyes. “What happened?”

“I've been on two planes.” He told his dad while forking his hands through his hair . “The flight got delayed in Denver for two hours,” Sam explained.

Joel clicked his tongue while resting his large hands on his hips, his fingers toying with the belt loop of his jeans. “Could've been here yesterday if you made me come get you.” Joel said while lightly shaking his head.

“You know I get motion sickness.” Sam instantly chimed in before darting him an offended look.

“Excuses,” Joel muttered before reaching over to grab Sam’s suitcase. “ You rode in a plane just fine.” He added under his breath before hauling the heavy luggage like it weighed nothing.

Sam opened his mouth to argue but Joel had already turned away to put it in the back seat of his truck. When he brought his attention back to Sam, his dark eyes landed on you. The faint amusement on his face drifted into dissatisfaction as his thick brows lifted in perplexity.

Your shoulders drew tight as you straightened your posture under his heavy gaze. His eyes traveled down your body, taking you in from where you awkwardly stood beside your suitcase.

“Oh, right.” Sam broke the silence as if he was just remembering you existed. “This is my girlfriend.” He said while stepping closer to you.

“It's really nice to meet you, Mr. Miller.” You greeted, attempting to keep your voice steady as you offered him a polite smile. You shifted your weight awkwardly as you dug your chilly hands into the pockets of your jacket for comfort.

“Just Joel.” He answered as he studied your face for another second.

“Joel.” You corrected yourself, the heat of embarrassment climbed up your neck as you drifted your gaze down to your snow-covered boots.

His eyes stayed on you briefly before shifting back to Sam. “You ain’t tell me she was coming,” he said while crossing his arms over his chest, forcing his enormous biceps to flex.

“It was supposed to be a surprise.” Sam revealed while scratching the back of his neck.

“You know damn well the cabin’s small, Samuel.” Joel exhaled through his nose, a visible cloud of breath disappearing into the cold air. “What were you thinking?” He huffed out a humorless laugh, aggravation evident in his voice.

“She's not going to take up much space.” Sam said while giving Joel an unconcerned shrug. “She’ll sleep in my bed.”

“I can get a hotel if….” The words slipped out before you truly had time to think.

“No.” Joel cut through your sentence as his attention snapped over to you. “We’ll make something work.” He said while reaching over to you and taking your suitcase before you had a chance to stop him.

You stared at him, completely caught off guard at how he spoke towards you; someone he just met five minutes ago.

As he turned around and threw your luggage into the backseat, you darted your eyes over to Sam to fling him a look.

You were regretting your choice of going on this trip.

⊱ ─── ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ ─── ⊰

The car ride to the cabin sank into an uncomfortable tension due to Joel not knowing about you coming to the cabin. Sam filled nearly every second with stories about his professors and his fraternity, completely unaware that you had barely spoken since leaving the airport.

You stayed quiet in the backseat, your fidgeting hands folded in your lap as you attempted to watch the snow-covered scenery. Every few minutes your eyes unintentionally drifted over to Joel, trailing down to his calloused hands rested firmly around the worn steering wheel.

You couldn't help but bring your gaze up to his face, watching the way his jaw stayed clenched. The crease between his brows refused to soften as his attention remained on the road.

His dark eyes would eventually lift to the rearview mirror, finding yours every single time. Your stomach tightened each time as you nervously held his gaze.

It was never long enough for Sam to notice but it was long enough for your breath to hitch before Joel silently returned his attention to the icy road ahead. You never understood why he kept looking at you like he was trying to observe every last detail of your face.

After two hours, the truck finally came to a stop . You didn't realize how stiff your body became from sitting so rigidly until you climbed out the truck. The icy wind brutally bit straight through your jacket, sending a shiver dancing down the bones of your spine.

The snow blanketed everything in sight except for the narrow trail leading towards the cabin. Towering trees surrounded the property while their thin branches drooped beneath the layers of snow.

It was breathtaking.

You glanced at the small cabin, the logs had darkened with age. Warm yellow lights glowed through the windows, making the entire place appear inviting unlike the freezing landscape.

“Pretty, isn’t it?” Sam asked as he climbed out of the truck. He stretched his arms over his head before flashing you a grin. “Worth the trip.”

“It’s beautiful,” you breathed out a response while taking in the view.

Joel walked around the front of the truck without saying anything, heading toward the side of the house for the snow-covered tools leaned against some logs.

“Told you,” Sam said, confidently smiling like he built the cabin himself.

Instead of helping you with the suitcases, he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. “Here.” He mumbled, shoving it into your hands. “Take a few pictures of me.”

“Right now?” You scoffed as you blinked at him in disbelief.

“Yes, now..” He said with an argumentative tone as he stepped back into the snow. “Make sure you get the cabin.” He added as he adjusted his jacket.

You almost rolled your eyes as you lifted the phone and snapped a few photos.

“I can tell those aren't going to be good.” He assumed with a frown before freezing into a pose. “Take another from a higher angle.” You forced a smile through your gritted teeth, taking another handful of pictures. Sam stepped back over to you before taking his phone out of your grip.

“Perfect.” Sam muttered with a satisfied grin. His attention was back on his phone, admiring himself on the screen as he began scrolling through the pictures.

With his free hand, he hauled his suitcase out of the backseat of the truck and started walking toward the cabin, not offering you an ounce of help.

You were left standing outside alone.

“What a gentleman.” You said to yourself before leaning over to grab your suitcase. “Don't even offer your girlfriend help,” You furiously mumbled as you wrestled with the heavy suitcase and carry-on. “How selfish can one be?” You pulled harder against the suitcase, knocking yourself off balance.

Before you could try again, another pair of hands reached past yours. The muscles in you instantly stiffened as you felt Joel’s warmth radiated against you. His broad chest brushed your back as his calloused hand wrapped around the suitcase and carry-on handle.

You could’ve sworn Joel had already followed Sam inside.

Embarrassment flooded your chest at the thought of him hearing every word you just said about his son raced through your mind.

With one effortless pull, he dragged both your belongings out of the truck. Joel then started strolling towards the cabin with your stuff, not giving you a moment to thank him.

You hurried after him, unable to ignore the fact that the man Sam swore was impossible had helped you before your own boyfriend even noticed you were struggling.

Your boots sank into the snow with every step as you caught up to him. Joel was already by the front door, holding it open for you. He kept his intense gaze on you as you strolled over to the cabin. Once you finally reached the front, you then delivered a tight smile before stepping inside.

The instant warmth wrapped around you, slowly easing the pinching sensation in your hands as you quietly took in every detail around you.

The small cabin smelled of burning wood and old leather. A fireplace dominated one wall; Old rifles mounted above it. Thick blankets were draped over a worn brown couch that appeared to have years of use. An old plaid rug stretched across the floor and a chipped wooden table rested on top of it.

This was the kind of place that immediately made you want to curl under a blanket with someone you loved and forget the rest of the world existed.

Joel shut the door with a heavy thud, staring at Sam who rested on the couch.

“Are you not gonna show your girlfriend the room?” Joel asked flatly, his deep Southern drawl carrying roughness.

“She’ll figure it out,” Sam murmured, barely sparing you a look before returning his attention to his phone. “The cabin ain’t big enough to get lost in.”

The careless response caught you off guard, leaving you standing there with your mouth slightly open.

“Really Sam?” You spat, pretending it hadn't bothered you as much as it had.

Joel stared at Sam while he took a slow breath and clenched his sharp jaw. He then pressed his lips into a firm line as disappointment quietly settled across his face.

“Come on.” Joel had started down the narrow hallway of the cabin with your stuff in his hand before you had time to realize he was talking to you. His boots thudded against the old hardwood floors with every long stride as you moved hastily to follow him.

Your attention drifted towards the wall, scanning the framed photographs stretching down the hallway. The photos carried memories of fishing trips, younger Sam covered in dirt and even Christmas morning

“Bathroom’s there.” He grumbled, slowing just enough to nod toward the aged wooden door down the hallway. “Water takes a minute to heat up.”

“Okay.” You replied, mentally noting the location after glancing in the direction of where he gestured.

“And if you need extra, they are in the closet right by the door.” He added while continuing to walk down the hallway until he reached the last door. His large hand wrapped around the knob before pushing the stubborn door open.

He allowed you to step into the room first then stepped past you and placed your belongings beside the bed closest to the window.

The room was small but surprisingly cozy. Two twin beds rested opposite from each other, allowing you to see the outstanding view that was overlooking outside. A thick plaid comforter was folded neatly across each mattress while a weathered wooden nightstand sat between the beds, holding an old lantern, worn paperback western novels and several half-finished crossword puzzles.

Against the wall stood a coat rack that had clearly survived decades of wear; the sturdy hooks hung several heavy winter coats and flannel jackets.

Your eyes wandered across the room before landing on the second bed.

“Ain't much.” Joel mumbled as he shrugged off his jacket and tossed it onto the center of his bed. “But then again this ain't a hotel.” His voice was so naturally rough that you couldn't tell whether he was trying to be rude or if it was just the way he spoke.

“I appreciate you for letting me stay here.” You said as you strolled over to the bed and carefully sat down at the edge of the mattress. “It means a lot Mr. Miller.”

“Joel.” He corrected again, more firmly. He brought his scarred hand up to his chin, softly ghosting his fingers against his beard. “It’s no problem, just don't touch anything that ain't yours.”

You nodded, smoothing your damp palm over your thighs.

“And don't go wandering off without letting me know.” He added as his gaze remained on you. “It ain't gonna be my responsibility if you get lost or hurt.”

“Anything else, grandpa?” You asked in a taunting tone as he stepped back a few inches to lean against the chipped door frame,crossing one boot over another. The harshness in his expression eased as the corner of his mouth threatened to move.

“Don't call me grandpa.” He said, the rough skin of his neck turning red as he fought the small grin from appearing on his lips. “I’m starting on dinner.” He pushed himself off the doorframe and glanced towards the hallway.

You nodded as you rubbed your palms together, suddenly aware of how tense you'd been since coming into the room..

“If you're hungry, eat.” He gave you one last look before turning and disappearing down the hallway.

⊱ ─── ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ ─── ⊰

The next morning, you woke up pretty early due to the excitement of experiencing a new state. You weren't going to let Sam’s feistiness and Joel’s grumpiness affect you from having a good time. You decided to make the most of your morning by taking an extended warm shower in an attempt to fight the coldness.

After showering, you stepped out of the bathroom feeling considerably warmer than you had all morning. You lathered yourself in your vanilla body care products then headed out of the bathroom.

You nearly jumped out of your skin when you saw Sam making his way down the hallway carrying a change of clothes.

“Be more considerate when you know there's only one bathroom.” He greeted you in aggravation.

“You could have knocked if you needed to use the bathroom.” You fired back while wrapping the towel tighter around your body.

“I shouldn't have to.” He mumbled before disappearing into the bathroom, closing the door of the bathroom with a slam that reverberated through the cabin.

Instead of banging down the door to pick an argument with him, you returned to the bedroom and scanned through your open suitcase on what to wear for the day.

Your hands paused over your group of underwear as you lifted an eyebrow in puzzlement. You swore you packed more than this. You scavenged through the folded clothes but eventually shrugged it off with an excuse that you were in a rush with packing and forgot some clothes at home.

You changed into a pair of comfortable clothes then strolled over to the coat rack. You slipped the furry denim jacket on, assuming it was Sam’s.

You then heard muffled grunts echo from outside. You didn't pay it any mind until another heavy sound pierced the air, accompanied by the crack of wood splitting apart.

You walked towards the window and peered through the foggy glass. Joel was standing several yards away from the cabin, surrounded by a growing pile of chopped logs. His sleeves were pooled by his elbows, exposing his forearms as he repeatedly brought the axe down against another piece of wood.

“Come on.” He grunted when the log didn't chop from the forceful strike of the axe. “Don't be that way to me now.” Joel huffed to the log as he swung it again with enough force to make the log split against the chopping block.

You watched for a moment before deciding to head outside. You found your boots and slid them on before making your way out of the cabin.

You immediately regretted your decision the moment the cold Wyoming air slapped severely against your exposed face.

The snow crunched beneath your boots with every step as you approached Joel.

At first, it didn't seem like he acknowledged you. His chest rose and heavily fell from the continuous movement, a faint cloud escaping from his lips each time he let out a breath.

“Shouldn’t be wearing such a sweet scent outside here.” Joel grunted, keeping his back turned to you. “It attracts the bears.” He added before standing another log upright on the chopping block.

“I didn't know…” You quietly admitted as you began fidgeting with your trembling fingers.

Joel didn't reply. For the next few minutes,a silence thrived between you and Joel, who seemed extremely fine with that.

“You built this cabin yourself?” You then spoke, wrapping your arms around your waist to shield yourself from the coldness. You watched the muscles in Joel’s shoulders pull tight as he halted, keeping his back turned to you.

“Yes.” Joel replied, his deep southern drawl gruff as he swung the axe against in the middle of another thick log.

“How long did it take to build?” You raised another question before the quiet had a chance to come between the two of you again.

“Not long.”Joel lifted the axe over his shoulder before bringing it down into the center of the log.

You nodded to yourself while pursing your lips at his short responses.“Don't you feel isolated being….” Before you could finish your sentence, Joel interrupted you by swiftly turning around to face you.

“You bored or something?” He inquired, completely shutting down your question.

“No…” You choked out, startled by how harsh he was.

“Then quit interviewing me.” He warned as his piercing gaze scorched your skin.

“Can I not make small talk with my boyfriend’s dad?” You scoffed, folding your arms against your chest as shame heated through you.

“Not this damn early in the morning.” He said while combing his rough hands through his hair, slicking back any loose curls that had fallen to his face. His face remained pinched with irritation before his eyes slowly lowered to what you were wearing.

“Why are you wearing my jacket?” Joel asked while taking a slow step toward you, his attention never leaving the oversized denim wrapped around over.

You sighed while nervously looking down at yourself. Your fingers instinctively grabbed the edges of the denim, suddenly realizing your mistake. “I thought it was Sam’s.” You mumbled before tugging at the sleeves.

He stared at you long enough to make you fidget before his eyes traveled over your face, narrowing them. “Well you thought wrong.” He grumbled.

“Sorry,” you muttered.

Joel’s sharp jaw clenched at your apology before his mouth lightly parted as if he wanted to say something else. Instead of speaking, he turned away, set another log onto the chopping block and raised the axe again.

“Where’s Sam?”

“Showering.” You replied, your voice quieter than you intended for it to be. Your eyes rested over his towering frame again as he planted his boots firmly into the snow and adjusted his grip on his face.

“He needs to hurry,”Joel said before raising the axe over his shoulder and swinging it down again. In an instant, the force caused a split through the dense core after the crack echoed through the woods. “Gonna be a rough night because a snowstorm is coming.”

“I can help.” You blurted out while strolling until you were beside him, glancing over at the enormous pile of wood.

“No.” He said in a fast response before throwing the chopped log to the side. “You can't.”

“Well, I still want to learn.” You challenged.

Joel released a long, exhausted breath and looked toward the sky, a faint gust of cold mist escaped his mouth as he shook his head. “You always this stubborn?”

“Depends.” You said as the corner of your lips lifted.

Joel let out a quiet huff through his nose, carrying the faintest trace of amusement.

“Fine.” He said before pressing his tongue against the inside of cheek. “Here, don't make me change my mind though,” Joel added before cautiously extending the axe towards you.

You stepped closer and accepted the tool from him, immediately realizing how much heavier it was than you expected.

Joel noticed the way your hands gripped awkwardly around the handle and moved behind you. Your breath caught when his body came close enough for you to feel his warmth through the layers of clothing. The cold air seemed to disappear the moment he entered your space. His unique scent immediately hit your nose, the smell of his soap, musk and fresh-cut wood drove your mind to go blank.

Without a word, he reached around you, his frame boxing you in as his calloused fingers rested against your hands.

“Don’t hold it like that.” He instructed before repositioning your hands. His chest lightly brushed against you as his steady breath ghosted against the side of your neck. “Don't fight how big the axe is, sweetheart.”

You swallowed the lump forming in your throat while attempting to concentrate on the handle instead of the way your pulse increased.

“Now,keep your feet apart.” He said while giving the inside of your boot a light nudge with his own until your stance widened.

“Like this?” You asked, glancing over your shoulder after planting your boots firmly in the snow.

He hummed a response of approval before you lifted the axe, struggling slightly with the weight. “Easy.” His voice dropped lower as his rough hand steadied your quivering forearm. “Don't fight it.”

“Now bring it down.” He instructed while monitoring the way your fingers tightened around the handle one more time.

You obeyed his instructions then swung the heavy tool against the log. The axe struck the wood unevenly before bouncing off the surface, resulting in a startled yelp escaping your lips.

“Again.” He gave a quiet response behind you, his calloused palms then ghosting over your knuckles. “Let the weight of the axe do the work.”

You drew in a small breath before lifting the axe again. You made an effort to swing the axe again and loosened your grip to make the weight of the tool take control. The blade sank deep into the center instead of bouncing off.

“There you go.” He said. “Not too bad.”

You turned your head enough to look at him, offering him a small smile. His eyes met yours as his gaze unintentionally dragged down to your lips then back up at your face. For a brief second, neither of you moved as Joel remained pressed against you.

Joel then cleared his throat and stepped away, giving you some space.

The hours slowly blurred together as the two of you worked through the growing pile of logs. Joel occasionally showed you how to split the thicker pieces but you remained focused on handling the smaller ones. You found yourself becoming more confident with every attempt.

Sam eventually came to help but he seemed more interested in documenting the trip rather than actually chopping the logs. He spent the few hours that had daylight constantly taking pictures of every moment he could capture for his fraternity friends.

Once the night came around, you guys settled inside the bedroom shortly after dinner. The peaceful snowfall changed into something extremely severe, finally revealing how brutal the night was going to be. You had spent most of the night curled into yourself, trying to preserve whatever warmth you had.

Sam had selfishly taken most of the blankets and comforters for himself, leaving you with a narrow corner that barely covered your shoulders. You tried to inch closer to him earlier in hope of him at least letting you share his warmth but he'd only move farther away.

After another hour of shivering, you finally gave up. You carefully slipped out of the bed, planting your bare feet onto the freezing wooden floor. You wrapped your arms around yourself while quietly making your way out of the room. You strolled down the hallway until something caught your attention when you were halfway toward the linen closet.

A small ounce of the yellow light from the bathroom spilled across the dark hallway. A thin strip of yellow light spilled from the bathroom doorway, cutting across the dark hallway.

You slowed down until you halted right in front of the partially opened door. A low grunt came from inside of the bathroom causing your eyebrows to pull together in confusion.

You considered walking away and pretending you didn't hear anything but when another grunt came from the bathroom, curiosity got the best of you.

You took a cautious step closer before leaning just enough to see inside. Your heart dropped when you saw Joel standing against the bathroom sink. The gusset of your dirty underwear was against his nose. His shoulders heaved up and down unevenly as his other hand stroked up his lengthy shaft.

You stared in stunned silence as he then placed his tongue flat against the cotton that collected most of your discharge throughout the day.

Your gaze naturally trailed down to his cock, taking in how enormous he was in size. His mushroom tip angrily glistened with pre-cum, twitching under his own touch. His lengthy cock had a slight upward curve with a thick girth that made your eyes widen. A long vein ran up his shaft, starting from the base of his cock all the way to his tip. His heavy balls were scattered in thick brunette hair, some strands streaked with grey.

He was so big.

Your pussy hungrily clamped around nothing as a variety of throbs frantically pulsed against the swollen nerve between your legs.

“Just like that, pretty girl.”Joel made a deep, rumbling sound as he threw his head back. Joel desperately slammed his hips against his hand, his thumb skimming underneath his tip with every stroke.

In astonishment, your lips fell open as you were unable to take your eyes off him no matter how hard you tried.

The look of craving in his eyes only resulted in your thighs clenching together to release the pressure aching in your lower stomach.

Your clit went on to swell while you kept an eye on Joel bringing your underwear down to his rigid shaft, pulling the cotton tight enough to choke his cock.

You found yourself needily drifting your hands down to the waistband of your sweatpants. Joel let out a low whimper as he thrusted against your underwear, closing his eyes in bliss.

Your cold hands then snaked down to your underwear before you gently cupped yourself through the cotton. You swallowed the lump of anticipation in your throat before your fingertips grazed over the already-damp cotton.

A flimsy breath left your nose as you pressed against your swollen clit before providing the nerve endings with tight circles. The sound of your wetness noisily filled the air while your slick pooled onto your underwear’s seat.

“Gonna make me cum, sweetheart,” Joel groaned in pure desire as his gaze fell onto your dirty underwear wrapped around him.

Your hips bucked against your hand as you fastened the pace on your clit, not once taking your eyes off of him. You moaned while circling your covered clit at a brisk pace, feeling an ecstatic sensation developing in you. Your walls clenched as a pulse of warm heat went through you.

“Dammit,”Joel growled as his thrust developed at a sluggish pace.

A tangle of bliss evolved in your lower stomach as you watched his full balls desperately pull tight. His thumb continued skimming against the sensitive head of his cock until his thick milky ropes of cum erupted all over your underwear, staining the hot pink cotton. You gazed at Joel drowning in his own pleasure as you proceeded with nursing your clit, chasing after your release.

But when the floor creaked under your foot, you hastily hauled your hands out of your pants. The juices from your covered slit oozed down your underwear as the pressure in your lower stomach ceased.

You quickly started to head over to the linen closet beside the bathroom in a rapid panic. You opened it as calmly as possible and searched through the shelves, pretending the only thing on your mind was finding a good blanket.

You flinched when you heard the bathroom door open. From the corner of your eyes, you saw the dim bathroom light outline Joel’s broad frame. Joel stood in the hallway before his attention snapped to you. Heat rose up your body as you went on with getting blankets in an attempt not to notice the way your clit frantically throbbed for an ecstatic release. You couldn’t stop thinking about what you’d just seen. You then reached for a folded blanket that was thick enough to keep you warm for the night.

“What’re you doing up?” Joel questioned, his voice roughened by the late hour and what he'd been doing alone in the bathroom.

“Obviously getting blankets.” You replied, sounding more aggravated rather than guilty. “It’s freezing.” You withdrew the blanket from off of the shelf.

“You could've turned on a light.” Joel said while narrowing his eyes at you as if he already knew you weren't telling the full truth.

“I can see just fine.”You debated.

“Barely.” He rested his large hands on his hips while slanting his head. “Don’t need you bumping into my damn furniture.”

“I wasn't planning on breaking anything, grandpa.” You remarked while hugging onto the blankets.

He shook his head before stepping past you, his shoulder brushing lightly against yours as he passed. “Get back to bed,”

⊱ ─── ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ ─── ⊰

The storm outside had only gotten worse when the morning arrived. Winds rattled against the cabin as snow continued piling against the windows. The power had flickered several times throughout the morning before giving out and leaving the cabin dim and unusually cold.

There wasn't much anyone could do except find ways to occupy themselves. Joel seemed perfectly fine with that, he sat around the dining table with a piece of wood in front of him. Several carving tools scattered across the surface as he worked on a piece, occasionally brushing away thin curls of wood before continuing. The constant scraping of his knife against the wood became the background noise of the afternoon.

Joel barely spoke a word to you after seeing you in the hallway last night. The only words he'd offered were simple questions whether you wanted something to eat or how you managed to sleep.

You sat curled up on the couch beneath a thick blanket, one of Joel’s old western novels rested against your lap. For an hour, You’d been stuck staring at the paragraphs though you couldn't remember a single word you'd read.

Your gaze kept drifting over to Joel due to how intensely his presence dominated the entire cabin. You caught him already glancing towards you, watching you read as if there was something on his mind. He then returned his attention to his carving.

Sam had been asleep for most of the day because with his phone practically useless without power, he'd lost his favorite distraction. You had hoped that without his phone occupying his attention, he might actually spend time with you but apparently sleeping was the next best time-killer for him.

You had spent most of your time in the cabin feeling like an unwanted guest. You tried to be patient with Sam and even ignored his attitude but the more he dismissed you, the more irritated it made you.

You finally turned another page of the book, forcing yourself to focus as the upsetting thought of Sam wandered through your mind.

The scraping of Joel’s knife continued as the silence between you and Joel became strange.

Another few minutes passed before the sounds of scraping slowed. “Would you ever move to Jackson?” Joel asked, shattering the silence. The question was so unpredictable that you weren't sure how to respond.

You moved underneath the blanket while turning your head to him.

Joel continued looking down at the piece of wood in his hands, casually running the blade against its dense surface as if he hadn't just asked you something.

“Like with Sam?” You replied hesitantly as your fingers tightened around the book.

“No.” He grumbled then completely paused. He put the carving tool down and leaned back against his chair, slightly jerking his hips up as he manspreaded wider. “I mean by yourself.” He clarified while studying your face.

You stared at him indecision, trying to figure out where the question had come from.

“I don’t know,” you admitted before breaking his stabbing eye contact. “Maybe if I actually had time to explore the town and get used to everything, I’d probably know whether I could see myself living here.”

“Yeah.” Joel gave a low hum as he leaned forward, resting his forearms against the table.

You brought your gaze back on him as you waited for him to say something else.

He then picked his carving tool back up and returned to the piece of wood in front of him instead of replying. Confusion filled your veins from him correcting you when you'd assumed he meant moving to Jackson with Sam.

Before you could make sense of it, Sam came down the hallway, looking like he’d barely managed to wake himself. His hair was flattened on one side and his face was heavy with a bitter expression, making it obvious that waking up hadn’t improved his mood.

“Any coffee left?”He shuffled toward the kitchen and rubbed his palms over his red face before looking around the cabin.

“Pot’s on the counter.” Joel grumbled, not bothering to look up from his carving and give his son any of his attention.

Sam walked toward the coffee pot on the portable stove. He poured himself a cup and leaned against the counter while taking a sip.

The rest of the afternoon passed at an agonizing pace until the night fell. You rotated between napping and reading Joel’s novel. When things got excessively uninteresting, you challenged Sam to a game of cards. The two of you competitively played a several rounds before Sam’s mood started to worsen.

Joel now sat quietly on the couch with a beer resting in one hand. He watched the two of you play beside the fireplace since carving wood got tiring.

“I win.” You declared with a satisfied smile while pulling your final card and laying it onto the living room’s centerpiece.

“You are cheating.” Sam groaned dramatically before aggressively throwing his cards down.

“You just can’t handle things not going your way.” You said before gathering all of the cards together.

Something in Sam's face changed as your words registered. "You really wanna go there?" he challenged, one eyebrow lifting.

"I do." You replied while wrapping the blanket around you as a chill found its way beneath your clothes.

"You've done nothing but complain since we got here." Sam said as a humorless laugh escaped him.

"You think that's what this is?" You gestured toward him with an open hand. "You've barely acknowledged me all week, you couldn't even help me with my bags."

"If you needed help, you could've asked." Sam fired back, shrugging as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"I shouldn't have to!” You exclaimed with a sharpened tone. "Just... be a gentleman."

"You're so ungrateful."He scoffed, looking at you in disbelief.

Your jaw tightened as you searched his face, hoping he would realize how unfair he sounded.

"You brought me on your Christmas trip without even asking your fucking dad." You shook your head, letting out a breathless laugh. "You seriously don't see anything wrong with that, is your ego that big?"

"My ego?” Sam laughed while shaking his head. “You don't get a say in my…..”

"Enough." Joel chimed in, his deep voice cutting cleanly through the living room. Joel leaned forward and set his beer onto the centerpiece as he glanced at Sam. “I didn't raise you to talk to a woman like that."

"Dad.." Sam sighed, dragging the word out in frustration.

Joel held up a hand before he could continue.

"No."He interrupted Sam again as he held up his hand. “You know better, Samuel.” He continued, disappointment spreading all over his captivating face.

“I’m going to bed.” You stood up, unable to stomach Sam for another second. Unable to sit there another second, you stood and hugged the blanket against yourself.

Your heartbeat pounded in your ears as you walked down the hallway. The cabin felt colder than it had all night. Once you reached the poorly lit bedroom, you wasted no time collapsing onto the mattress. The old springs screeched beneath your weight as you pulled the thin sheet over yourself, desperately trying to trap whatever warmth your body still had.

The argument replayed in your mind over and over again. Joel stood up for you when he didn't have to. He barely knew you but he still noticed what Sam didn't and cared enough to say something.

After letting your thoughts settle, you felt your body relax against the mattress. Your eyes grew heavy and for a moment, you thought you might actually fall asleep until the sound of heavy footsteps filled the room.

You immediately recognized that it was Joel due to his presence driving the entire room to feel different. The bed beside you then groaned under his weight as he sat down.

There was nothing but silence until Sam walked into the room. He climbed into the bed resulting in the mattress dipping. Sam didn't apologize but you were used to it. After every argument, he shut you down leaving you to wonder if your feelings were even worth acknowledging. He entirely pulled the covers toward himself and turned away from you.

You stayed awake staring at Sam’s back for the next few minutes, questioning if a relationship with him was right for you. On top of that, Sam unconsciously kept tugging at the layers of the covers in his sleep.

You weren't dealing with another losing battle of him not being considerate of you so you cautiously slid out of bed with a little sigh.

You made your way toward the door, softly stepping against the wood flooring to not wake Joel and Sam. You had hardly taken a few more steps before a deep voice sliced through the darkness.

“Where are you going?” Joel questioned as the lantern beside Joel’s bed flickered on, radiating a yellow glow to the shadows across his face.

“I thought you were asleep,” You whispered. “I’m going to get more blankets, Sam won't share.”

“There ain't any more.” Joel breathed out a reply before rubbing a hand over his face and looking back at you.

You felt his eyes scorch your chilly skin as you gradually walked toward your suitcase.

“I’ve got more blankets than Sam.” Joel said before you had a chance to search through your belongings for a sweater. Joel adjusted himself against the mattress, moving to make room.“You can come over here.”

Your heart skipped against your chest as you walked toward the bed. You weren’t going to decline his offer; not when your fingers were already numb and your body was continuously shivering, failing to make an effort to warm your own skin up.

Joel watched you approach, his expression was completely unreadable. “Come on,” he muttered lowly, his voice was still rough but there was something softer about his tone.

You carefully climbed into the bed, pulling the blankets over yourself. The steady warmth of his body immediately hit you as your back rested against him. The tension in your shoulders slowly left as you relaxed against the firm mattress.

Joel stayed still at first like he was giving you an opportunity to change your mind but he then wrapped his large hand around you before pulling the thick material higher to your shoulders.

You eventually started drifting to sleep when your body’s temperature began regulating.

“I’m sorry about Sam.” Joel whispered

“Don’t…”You mumbled, barely awake as your eyes heaved in sleep.

“No, I mean it.” He interrupted gently. “This whole college thing changed him.”

“It’s okay,” you replied, unsure how to respond.

“No, it ain’t.” He sighed as he stretched over you to turn off the lantern. “I’m sorry to say but that ain't he ain't good enough for you.” He admitted after a long pause as one of his hands delicately started rubbing over your knuckles.

His sentence woke you up completely. You moved minimally in his big arms until you could look back at him from over your shoulder.

“Are you telling me to break up with him?…”You mumbled before resting your head back onto the soft cushion of the pillow.

“Hell no.” He scoffed before trailing his hands to the small of your waist. “That choice is yours.”

You dampened your bottom lip with your tongue, allowing his statement to hang in the air.

“But you don't deserve to spend your life with someone who overlooks you.” He continued as you released a slow breath. “That ain’t how you treat someone you love.”He stated, his breath fanning against the croak of your neck as his rough hands started lazily dragging up your shirt. Electricity crashed against you as the warm pad of his thumb delicately circled against your belly . “You deserve a real man.”

“Joel.”

“Tell me to stop and I will.”Joel rasped as his smooth bottom lip grazed against your earlobe. “Just say the words, sweetheart." His calloused hand halted right under the swell of your breast, sending goosebumps to prickle against your skin.

“Please don't stop.” You stuttered as his long fingers gave the hardened bud of your nipple a pinch. A tiny gasp rolled off your tongue at the dull sensation. “I want you…”

Joel chuckled lowly due to how reactive your body was to him. Your hips jerked as his rough hands dragged down to the elastic waistband of your pants.

His lips touched your cheek, brushing over your skin. Your eyes closed briefly then reopened, shooting a hazy gaze across the room.

Joel’s hand then slipped deeper between your thighs, cupping you through your damp panties.A sharp coil formed in your stomach as your chest rose and fell heavily.

“Wet already?” His voice was a whisper as he pulled you closer to his hips by pressing his thick fingers against your aching clit.

Joel slid his hand down your underwear, exploring your folds with two of his fingers. A rush of heat burned through you as your gaze dropped to the blanket.

The pulse on your clit thumped as his fingertips delicately settled over the nerve then moved in slow, tight circles.

“You like that?” He asked as your hips jolted, desiring the friction of his fingers.

You nodded, a moan threatening to roll off your tongue as tiny tremors of anticipation racked through your body.

“What angel?” He asked in a condescending tone as his fingers pressed harder against your throbbing point. “Use your words.”

“I love it.” You whimpered as your hips eagerly pushed against his fingers, moving them in the same circles he was making against you. A spike of biting euphoria rose in you as your walls clamped around nothing.

“See how easy that was?” Joel rumbled in satisfaction as his lips grazed the skin behind your ears, witnessing you almost cry out from the friction he was creating on your clit.

“Easy.” Joel drifted his fingers away from your clit. “No need to ride my fingers, I'll give you something else that's worth your while.” He said before slipping his hands out of your panties.

You took a choppy breath as the unbelievable tension that kept building unexpectedly dimmed down from the lack of Joel’s touch.

He brought his fingers that glistened in your slick up to his mouth, giving his fingertips a suck to savor your taste. “You taste even better on my fingers.” He remarked before quickly sliding his hands under the blankets and peeling your pants and underwear to your knees. He then pulled down his own, allowing his fat member to spring out against your ass.

Your eyes widened as he didn't hesitate to bring his rock-solid cock between your thighs. He explored your puffy lips with the thick head of his cock, nudging against your clit with every drag. “You know I saw you in the hallway that night?” He rasped as he dragged to your clamped entrance.

“You aren’t a saint yourself.” You managed to reply as a wave of passion surged in your stomach.

“Never said I was.” He replied before gradually thrusting into your warm cunt.

“Relax,” Joel mumbled as your walls constricted when his fat mushroom tip pressed right against the precious, spongy spot in your pussy. “You can take it, sweetheart.”He groaned low into your ears as you wriggled beside him, the pleasurable pain fiercely aching at your entrance.

Your mouth snapped wide at the overwhelming burn of your pussy being stretched open around his unnaturally thick girth. Your hand flew behind you as a laboring moan departed from your lips. You clawed at the outer muscles of Joel’s leg as he settled deep in you, longing to save every moment of your pussy clamping around him. The stillness pushed your juices to rapidly leak around the base of his cock.

“Doing so good for me.” He praised, his voice dropping with sex as his large hand found its way to the fat of your hip, the rough pad of his thumb tracing tiny circles against the skin.

“You feel so good…..”You managed to remark before Joel intentionally drew his shaft back until only his mushroom tip stretched out your entrance. The vacant feeling in your belly hastily formulated as your pussy clung to him with all of its might.

“I know baby I know.” He cooed before thrusting back into you in one unhurried motion. “I ain't going nowhere.” He grunted before placing a delicate kiss on your covered shoulder. The pounding in your chest increased as a web of satisfaction curled through your body.

His hands then travelled up from your hips, exploring the contours of your body while he hastened his sluggish pace into something continuous and snappy. Joel settled his hands around your neck before adding pressure. He used the grip on it to pound deeper into your stretched pussy.

A quiet wail fled your mouth as your back arched off his chest, attempting to adjust to his enormous size. Small sounds of your wetness reverberated around the two of you as he continually drove into you without any mercy.

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as your thighs began to quiver from the unfamiliar pleasure that Joel was providing you with.

“You look so pretty wrapped around me, sweetheart.” He groaned before kissing the skin of your temple. “Sam doesn't deserve this cunt at all.”

“He doesn’t…”The words left your lips in a whisper as your gaze wandered across the room to Sam. He laid beneath the layers of blankets with his back facing the two of you, sleeping without a clue of what you were doing.

“Glad we agree on something.” Joel answered as you felt his cock twitching up against your velvety walls. “Because this pussy was made for me.”

Your walls fluttered at his taunting as your fluids shamelessly pooled down your inner thighs and onto the cotton of Joel’s bed sheet.

He breathed out a humorless laugh as his hands shifted to your waist. “You have no morals, hm?” He tested while slowing the roll of his hips, driving into you deeper. “Can't believe a sweet girl like you could turn out to be such a dirty cheater.”

Before you could react, he pulled away from you and flipped you onto your stomach in less than a second.

“What am I going to do with you?” He tssked as quietly as possible while lifting your hips up just an inch. Your heart pounded at how dangerous this was becoming.

“Joel……” You whimpered, your barely audible voice shaking in alarm. “What are you doing?” The sheets spilled off the both of you, the edge of the comforter settling on the edges of the mattress and even the floor. At that moment none of you seemed to care, not when his cock was nudging right against the hungry entrance of your heat.

“I want you to show me how much of a dirty girl you are.” He ordered while pressing his broad hands against your lower back. “Take my cock in front of Sam.” Joel added.

Your mind spiraled with every reason to stop but you shamelessly moved your hips enough for your pussy to swallow the wet head of his cock.

“Look at you.” He murmured as he ran his fingers up the curve of your back. “Such a greedy girl.” He remarked before leaning forward until his chest pressed against your back. He then relaxed his weight on top of you before finally pushing deeper into you. The position made him feel even more gigantic than he already was.

You bit back a moan as you took every inch of him.

“Fuck…”Joel dragged out, his hot breath fanning against your neck. A sharp wave of ecstasy twisted low in you as he thrusted to the hilt, his heavy balls pressing right against your swollen clit.

“Too big,” You gasped out as your walls struggled to adjust to him. The thickness of his girth dominated your walls, forcing the velvety tissue to mold around him. “I don't think I can take all of it….”Your hands desperately gripped onto the sheet beneath you as you made an effort to keep as still as possible.

“Bullshit, baby girl.” He grunted before driving into you. “You can take it, you will.”

A pleasured cry slipped from between your lips as you were no longer able to contain your quietness.

“Shhhh,” He cooed while picking up the ruthless pace. He rolled his hips in a calculated motion so that the bed head didn’t pound against the wall.“You've been good at staying quiet all night, don't mess up now.”

Your pussy stretched helplessly, welcoming his cock.

Joel pumped into you steadily, allowing his balls to smack against your pulsing nerve endings with every brutal thrust. The mushroom tip of his cock deliberately kept hitting the spongy area in you, sending your slick around his length to trickle down the crevices of your folds.

The tide of bliss inside of you kept maturing as Joel eagerly drilled into your pleading tight cunt. You continually moaned against his pillow as the sensation of his cock relentlessly stretching you loose became too much to handle.

“Fucking you better than Sam?” Joel raised a question when he felt your walls shudder in wave-like motions. “Hm, sweetheart?”

In daze, you gave a weak nod against the pillow, too scared to answer out loud because you were very positive that something far louder than words would escape.

“Do you like being a good slut for his dad?” His grunts evolved into low animalistic sounds as he entirely caged his massive body against you.

All you could do was give him another nod.

“Well you are going to get filled up like one.” Joel groaned as he roughly pounded into your intoxicating pussy, hunting for his release.

“Don't cum in me…not on the pill…” You strained out as your hips jerked up to keep his heavy balls slapping repeatedly against your throbbing bud.

“Nu uh, i’m going to use this pussy however the fuck I want.” His hips continued moving at a maddening pace. “I've been thinking about this since the moment I saw you.”

Tears of pleasure began welling in your eyes as he buried his cock deep in you with every thrust. The fullness was so much to handle that you placed your hands behind you to press against his chest.

“Don't run from it.” He growled as he leaned back, taking your hands and roughly pinning them to your sides. “Ain't this what you wanted?”

His twitching cock was now bullying your cervix. You tilted your head against the pillow, muffling the guttural moan coming out of you as you felt every ridge of Joel’s cock.

“There we go, you are taking me so well.”

“You are so fucking deep in me.” You whined as the tension in your stomach hastily rose, every rhythmic force of his thrust was bringing you closer to your release. “I’m so close..please don't stop.” You cried out against the pillow as your pussy pulsed and squeezed around him in rhythmic waves.

“That right?” He taunted as he released his hold on your wrist then gripped the back of your neck.

“Yes…fuck…yes.” You choked out while your cunt clenched around Joel, choking the length of his massive cock.

Sam shifted beneath his blankets, letting out a sleepy grunt as he rolled over until he was facing the two of you. His soft snores faded for a moment before slowly returning.

You squirmed against Joel’s heavy body but he only proceeded with persistent thrusts, making it his mission to bring you to your release whether Sam woke up or not. The wet, filthy sound of his cock driving into your soaked pussy filled the room.

“Remember now, you made your choice.” Joel groaned before removing his hands from behind your neck. “You ain't Sam’s no more.” He informed while slanting enough to leach his soft lips on the skin of your neck. His hips snapped harder, the pace picking up until he was mercilessly pounding into you. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as saliva that's been pooling in your mouth eventually leaked out the corners, dripping down to the pillow case.

“Let it out, I feel you cumming.” Joel cooed, his deep rumbles turning into breathy groans as he looked down at the sight of his cock disappearing into your overworked cunt.. “I am right there with you.”

It didn't take long before every muscle in your body sprouted stiff from the ecstatic warmth of your orgasm washing over you. You entirely fell apart as you trembled beneath Joel’s weight.

Joel hurriedly clamped his hands to your mouth then pressed his calloused palm roughly against your drool-covered lips, silencing the moan you wouldn't have been able to suppress.

“Good girl, you look even prettier when you cum.” He remarked while he resumed pumping into you at his devastating pace. You felt his cock twitch against your walls as the rate at which he was pounding into you got chaotic and aggressive. “Just too perfect.”

You moaned laboriously against Joel's palm while the aftershocks of your orgasm tingled in you. Your spasming walls frantically massaged his cock in wave-like motions as he eagerly pushed himself to his edge.

"Milking me dry.” Joel groaned as he paused right by your cervix. “ I want you all to myself.” His cock twitched before warm liquids spilled deep into your heat. Your mouth fell open against his rough palm while his thick cum continually sprayed against your walls. He slowly pumped into you a few more times, guaranteeing that you got every last drop of him.

“Can we go again?” You asked while catching your ragged breath before lazily looking over your shoulder at Joel.

——————————————————————————

Taglist: @strawberrylipglossx , @stargirl331 , @haloramyun , @drabbotsweetheart , @pedrofan , @4ngelarchive, @an5559275555gel @shrewdreader

[joelmillerpascal]

I want to try it for myself too someday, but is anyone interested in making me, I don't know a one-shot or a series of The Last Of Us and The Walking Dead combined into one.

Add the main The Walking Dead cast and The mains from The Last Of Us cast too. One world but different creatures

Walkers and Infected / you've got to have watched both shows of course to get where I'm at with the idea

👇🏼 Idea 👇🏼

Maybe Rick Grimes has a sister that went to Texas to study her PhD or something until the world went to shit so she has no way of getting to her brother Rick. Then maybe his sister sees Joel and Tommy (set after Sarah just died) they look sceptical of Rick sister but she gets them to trust her. Then maybe she travels with Joel and Tommy (obviously Joel doesn’t talk for some time until a near scare happens) that causes Joel to become more protective of her but also Joel loses Tommy because of the infected... I don't maybe they travel for months where they find out it's not just infected but infact Walkers until they come across a community 'ALEXANDRIA' where they stay until 2 people Aaron and Eric found Rick and his people. It will get emotional and happy. I don't want it where Joel has to take Ellie from the Boston QZ because I don't want them set there, I want it where Ellie and Joel meet in Alexandria, and maybe Maria is in Alexandria too. Maybe Alexandria trade with another settlement Jackson there Joel finds Tommy and Tommy meets Maria.

Maybe add The Saviors (Negan and his group) and Raiders that Joel and Rick and everyone has to find to survive.

👆🏼just an idea for my two favourite apocalypse shows 👆🏼 Hope it made sense ❤️😇

[elliviee]

he's the babiest baby ever and I wish I could bathe him with smooches 🥹

oh how I love him...

[followyourfleart]

𝐂𝐥𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝟒𝟕: 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐒𝐭𝐞𝐩𝐬 𝐅𝐨𝐫𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐝 ˖˚⊹ ꣑ৎ

Next | Pervious | Fic Masterlist | a03

blurb - Your first days of 2004 become your last four with Joel in New York. The brief time left together is filled with heavy conversations about the future. Together, you confront difficult questions about the paths your lives may take once you part ways.

Word Count: 11.4 k

He would be a liar if he said you didn’t have the most comfortable bed he’d ever slept in. 

Joel had the honor of sleeping by your side many times. In fact, he had done so since he was a child. You, he, and Tommy all bundled up in the weak cold months of winter with your legs knocking together, bodies shivering. Each time, you’d lean into Tommy’s arms, face nuzzled into his chest with your back presented straight to Joel’s face. 

Twins, his mama would explain to Joel every time you and he ran off somewhere. A sort of not-so-biological connection that existed. He had thought it was stupid; last time he checked, you hadn’t been strolled out in a bassinet as well when Tommy was born. 

Yet, it didn’t matter. Because by the middle of the night, you would leave Tommy’s grasp and slip into Joel’s muttering sleepily about how Tommy got sticky-sweaty while Joel was a proper warm. He took those moments and bundled them into his heart. 

Joel had a lot of things he kept close to him. Sarah’s birth, cooking with his mama, fixing up the truck with his daddy, learning from Clyde, and fighting with Tommy. But he kept his moments with you in an extra grip, because the time between them was so far apart. 

So when he got to sleep in bed with you—sexual or not—he was overwhelmed. Two months without that drained him more than the thirteen years ever had. Maybe a taste of you had gotten him addicted far worse than the pathetic following he did in his youth. 

Joel wasn’t plagued by these thoughts constantly. He wasn’t some philosopher pondering his relationship with you—at least, when he was happy. Sometimes, the little connections would pop up in his head, and then he’d brush the threads away like spider webs. 

That’s what happened when his eyes were barely able to open. Joel’s face was pressed deep into your pillows—satin, he believed?—with his naked body pressed into the sheets. It was slightly chilly against his skin, to the point where it made him shiver. 

No sunlight beamed over his skin. Rather, he could hear the soft beat of snow hitting your windows. There was no warmth except for the center of the bed, which was already escaping him.

He thought for a moment he was back in a dream. His dreams were never easy waters.

Joel was barely able to blink a couple of times, fighting the sleep that weighed on his bones and face. His muscles were taut as he pushed himself up from the bed in a groan. Naturally, his hand reached toward your side, trying to find you and wake you up as well. 

Yet, he felt nothing. 

That woke him up. Without his glasses, everything was fuzzy. It was even worse with the morning fog hanging around his brain, but he still managed to push himself up and sit sideways.

Your side of the bed was empty, the comforter all bunched completely over his legs. There was no sign of you. Not by the side table, or the dresser—the tray was even gone—or any noise coming from downstairs. 

He couldn’t help it; all of this was an exact flashback of Dallas. 

When he woke up then, he had the slamming of the door as his wake-up call. He had called your name so many times, yet there was no answer. He was completely alone, left to reel with the fact that he had just had mind-blowing, drunk sex the woman he had been in love with for two decades. 

Just like now.

Joel swung his legs over the edge, using the comforter to cover up. His head twisted around, as if you were hiding from him. “Sweetheart…?”

He hated how doubtful his voice sounded, but he couldn’t help it. Had you gone to work, leaving him to pace around your living room until you came back? Had you left in shame again? No, that wouldn’t be the case, because you both had had the most heartfelt conversation on a rooftop. He had just fucked your brains out and came inside you. You wouldn’t have left. 

He stood up now, the fabric trailing behind him as he stubbled with tired legs, voice louder this time. “Sweetheart? Where are you?”

Nervous, he headed for the slightly opened door. 

But he stopped when the flush of the toilet and the quick rush of water caught his attention. 

Maybe it was the fact that relief rushed through his body and relaxed him; he didn’t move. But when he realized that he was buck naked with nothing but his hand and a comforter covering his crotch, his face turned red, and he almost jumped back into bed. 

Before he could, however,  the bathroom door opened, and there you walked out. You were yawning, hand covering your mouth. One of his shirts—from his dresser downstairs, matter of fact—covered your torso, dipping over your thighs, though he saw the flash of clean panties underneath. Your hair wasn’t kept at all, in its most natural and beautiful form 

You spotted him and smiled. That smile. A star-studded, heart-throbbing, mind-blowing smile that made him dizzy. But it faded when you frowned and looked down and morphed into a smirk. 

“I didn’t know the lobby provided this type of service.” You teased, leaning against the doorway of the bathroom, legs crossed over each other, “Nude breakfast and all the benefits. I wouldn’t have called this personally, but if it’s you…”

“Oh, this ain’t—this ain’t anythin’.” Joel managed to wrap his legs and tie a knot on his waist, securing the fabric and freeing his hands. “I was just wakin’ up, is all.”

“Hmm… have you been working on your thighs, Miller? They seem bigger than before.”

“I have, actually.” He beamed when you noticed his progress, so much so he didn’t notice you walking toward him. “Pickin’ up shifts to work at sites and also workin’ out gave me a lot more muscle than ‘fore. The kids say it's ‘bulkin’’, but I call it keepin’ healthy—grumph!”

You had kissed him, mouth against his to silence his words. He tasted the minty toothpaste on your tongue as he worked his lips against yours in smooth rhythm. He held the back of your neck and felt your arms lay on his shoulders. He slightly pulled back to speak. 

“I didn’t brush my teeth, yet.” The words were against your lips.

“That doesn’t matter.”

“Kinda does. You don’t want to have to wash your mouth ‘gain and—”

“Shut up and kiss me, Joel.”

“Yes ma’am.”

He turned and walked you backwards until the back of your knees hit the edge of the bed and you both fell. Your lips never separated once. The comforter pulled and fell onto the floor as he landed on top of you, but he paid no mind.

All he had was you and him in that moment. There could be a fire that was burning all of New York City down, and he would still find time to kiss you. Nothing mattered except you. There was only you in his eyes. 

Your legs lay on either side of his hips. You pecked him over and over, soft smacks against his lips that warmed him up far more than the bed could. 

“Did you shower yet?” He asked while still running his mouth up and down your jaw. “You don’t smell like it.”

“Are you saying I stink?” You pushed him back, though he fought back to stay close. 

“Never. I’m just sayin’ that gives me less time to lay on you ‘fore you decide you want to clean up.”

“Says the man completely naked on me right now.” You teased. Joel blushed, looking away from your face and his body, but you laughed and pulled him back in. “It’s okay, I like it.”

“You’re only sayin’ that ‘cause we had sex.”

“You know, sex is such a crude word.” You tapped your chin in mock thought, “What about… making love? Or, devils tango? Or—”

“First off, I ain’t sixty.” He traced his hand up and down your warm spine, causing the fabric of your—his—shirt to rise. “Second off, sex ain’t evil. If it was, then we’re the most evil of ‘em all from how I was pressin’ you up ‘gainst the window with my face ‘tween your—”

“See! Crude!” You laughed. Suddenly, you were pushing him to lie on his back, with your hips perched on his. You sat right on top of him, not that he had any issue with it. He liked having his hands back on your hips and your thighs bracing around his stomach. “You should really learn how to watch your language.”

“Says the woman on top of me.”

“Are you complaining?”

Joel looked up at you, thumb running over your panties. “How could I?”

Your eyes softened, and you leaned over him. Your arms found their place around his head as you softly kissed him over and over, lips moving together in harmony. Both your hands roamed and touched, feeling everything that you both had missed. 

It was painful to remove his mouth from yours, but he had to. Even though all he wanted to do was stay in bed and forget the world, there were still things he promised to do. 

Despite your obvious disappointment—which he found endearing—he still managed to smile. 

“Sweetheart, what is this?”

“Us?”

“Yeah. What are we?”

Fingers caught in his hair, you looked at his graying scalp instead of his eyes. “We’re… together again, obviously.”

“Obviously.” He repeated it like either of you knew exactly what it meant. “But what is together? Are we back to bein’ me bein’ your boyfriend? Is this… is this somethin’ you wanna just do for tonight?”

“Never,” You frowned at him. “Ever say that to me again. You are so much more to me than just sex.”

“Crude language.”

“I’m serious, Joel.” Peppering kisses on his nose, you still kept that serious look on your face. “This isn’t Dallas where I pretend this didn’t happen. No, I said we would make this work, and we’re making it work.”

He was thankful for that. He couldn’t have been luckier, even if he tried. “We will. I don’t need an exact title for what we are. Still earnin’ you back—”

“Another thing.” You spoke with such sureness that it felt like he was a subordinate at your office. “I don’t want us to have that dynamic.”

“What dynamic?”

“You know, the one where you’re constantly chasing me and wanting to prove yourself to me. You have proven yourself to me and you’ve done the work. Now, it’s up to both of us to make this work.”

“But I don’t want you to feel as if I did all that and now I’m goin’ to be lazin’ ‘round.”

“When have I ever known you to lazing around?” You questioned with a quirk of your lip. “It’ll just take a bit of time before we’re ready again. And I know our end goal.”

Joel didn’t need you to say it loud for him to know either. 

‘Til then…” His arms tightened around you. “Stay for a bit. Wanna sleep in.”

“Joel, I have—”

“Lies, you don’t got work. Michelle herself ain’t gonna be there, so you don’t got to either.”

“I wasn’t going to say that.” You shook your head. “I was going to say… maybe we could—I don’t know if you’re up for it—shower and then eat something. Everything will be closed since it’s New Year’s… but tomorrow we could take a stroll around the city, just you and me?”

“Sounds awfully like a date, sweetheart.”

“A two-day date situation,” You held up the numbers on your fingers in case he couldn’t catch on. “Since we’re landlocked here. And there’s a lot two people could do by themselves.”

Joel swallowed as you rose to your knees, straddling his hips. “Like what?”

“Depends on what we’re feeling like. Movies for hours, could order in some McDonald's—”

“Now that sounds wonderful.”

“—or…” Like the simple creature he was, he watched your nails drag over his chest and down his navel, “...we could listen to your suggestion. Stay in bed a bit longer.”

“I wouldn’t be against that. Reason why I suggested it.” Joel’s hands reached up and through your shirt, feeling your soft torso. 

He was about to pull you down when you suddenly swung yourself off, leaving him alone on the bed. Joel covered himself up with both hands, watching with a soft grunt as you strutted back to the bathroom. 

Your—his, again—shirt landed on the floor. Your back was exposed to him, revealing the faint bruising of where he had gripped you last night. Over your shoulders, on your waist, deep in your hips. You arched an eyebrow while pushing open the door.

“Are you going to watch or join?”

Joel didn’t need to be told twice. 

He got up and followed you. By the time he shut the door behind him, you had already stripped and were turning on the water. Your fingers tested the heat, and you both waited for a second before you slipped through the shower doors.

The water was a steady drum over your skin, cascading down your front. Over the perfect body he couldn’t help admiring. It ran down your neck, over your breasts, dripped over your waist. You ran your hands over yourself in the most ordinary way possible, but it was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. 

You giggled when you noticed him not coming in. He closed his mouth. Was he drooling? Joel hoped you hadn’t noticed, but when you opened your own mouth and trailed your finger out of the corner of your lips down, he knew you had.

As quickly as he could, Joel brushed his teeth with his toothbrush and your toothpaste. He had kept an extra pair up here during the nights he had slept in your bed. He had thought it would be a simple thing. Now, it was the most important thing.

Joel spat out this toothpaste and gruggled water. He joined you in the warm spray, his back taking all the water. Before you could say anything, he was already on you, holding you tight and trading soft, slow kisses. You held him through it all, unable to get a proper grip.

But that was fine. Joel could keep you near him without any help. 

You suddenly laughed softly against his lips, “It seems like we always shower together, Miller.”

“You complainin’?”

“How could I, especially when you look so good like this?”

“What, wet and naked?”

You put a bit of thought into it, “Yeah, that might be it.”

Joel laughed this time, pecking your lips childishly. He couldn’t get enough of it. 

He also couldn’t get enough of how your lips felt on his skin. Pillowy, trailing down his neck and over his collarbone. Joel held the side of your head, refusing to let you go. 

Then you went lower.

And lower.

Down his chest and belly and navel, hungry for him in a way he couldn’t keep up. 

“Sweetheart, sweetheart,” He tried to dip his head to bring you back up, “Come back to me—”

“But I wanna be down here.”

You were already sinking, knees folding beneath you and your hands sliding down his hips. Joel’s grip on the side of your head tightened for a second. He couldn’t decide whether to haul you back up or just hold on.

“C’mon, baby… you don’t gotta—” His voice came out softer than he meant. Water ran over the places your mouth had just been. “I’d rather have you up here. Don’t need you on your knees for me.”

You looked up at him through the steam, lips already brushing the trail of hair below his navel. “I know you don’t need it. But I want to. Let me take care of you for once.” Your hands stroked slowly up the backs of his thighs. “You were so good to me last night… let me make you feel good too. Please?”

His resolve was crumbling fast, and the way you were looking at him—adoring and a bit wicked—wasn’t helping. It also wasn’t helping that your face was right next to his half-hard cock, looking up at him with the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen.

He exhaled hard through his nose, thumb brushing your wet cheek.

“…Alright,” he muttered, almost shy. “But if your knees start hurtin’, you get up. Deal?”

You smiled against him. “Deal.”

You started slow, testing the waters. Kitten licks that started on his tip and explored the slit right on top. Curiosity about how you could break him pushed you down his shaft, tasting all of him. 

Then you had taken him into his mouth, and he knew he had lost. 

Lord, he was overwhelmed. The warmth of heated air, constant water, and now your lips wrapped around the base of his cock were going to send him onto a rollercoaster that was too fast. And there wasn’t even anything for him to hold onto; the shower walls far too slippery. 

He wasn’t going to last.

He never lasted with you, but it was way worse now. 

Your tongue took and took more, tasting, taking your fill. Joel threw his head back, knees suddenly weak and letting out noises he didn’t even know were possible. Your nails were now digging into his thighs, the same ones you had just praised only to claw into. 

Joel squeezed his eyes shut, about to moan—

Slap!

He jolted, then groaned when your lips left his cock altogether. You had harshly tapped his thigh. Not enough to hurt, no, but enough to clear up the fog bellowing in his head. 

When he looked down, chest heaving, you had a stern look on your face. Your lips were turned downwards into a pout, but he could see the wicked gleam in your eyes. You held a firm grip around him, not letting him go.

“Keep those eyes of yours open, or this stops.”

“I’m tryin’. It’s just been a long time, ‘kay?” He blinked, déjà vu hitting him square over the head.

You giggled, resting your cheek right across his wet thigh. “Doesn’t feel so nice when it's turned onto you, does it?”

The urge to whine was immense, but he kept his cool. “So this is… this is what, payback?”

You hummed, dragging your lips slowly along the thick vein on the underside of his cock. The heat of your mouth and the shower water mixed until he couldn’t tell which was which. 

“Maybe a little. You made me work so hard earlier… made me beg.” Your tongue flicked over the head, tasting him, before you pulled back just enough to look up again. Water clung to your lashes. “Figured it was only fair I return the favor.”

Joel’s jaw flexed. “You’re evil, you know that?”

“Mm. And yet you’re still hard as a rock in my hand.” You gave him a slow stroke, and his hips twitched hard against your grip. “Eyes open, Joel. Don’t make me stop.”

He let out a rough breath, forcing his gaze to stay locked on yours even as his brows drew together. Water ran into his eyes; he didn’t bother wiping it away. “Yes, ma’am.”

That earned him a soft laugh. 

Then you leaned in and finally took him into your mouth again, sinking until your lips stretched around the thick base. Your tongue dragged along the underside as you started to bob, unhurried and deep. 

One hand stayed wrapped around what you couldn’t fit, twisting gently on every upward pull, while the other rested on his thigh, feeling the muscle jump under your palm.

He kept his eyes open for you just like you’d told him. Every time you hollowed your cheeks and sucked harder, a low sound rumbled out of his chest, half-lost in the rush of the shower.

You kept going, and Joel’s control started to fray without him noticing. His hips began to rock forward on their own. Small, instinctive thrusts that pushed him deeper into the wet heat of your mouth. 

The first few times he caught himself and tried to still, but the pleasure was too much. Your tongue, the tight seal of your lips, the way you took him so willingly—it pulled more from him than he meant to give.

His hand wrapped around your wet hair. The next thrust went deeper, then even deeper. He was chasing the slick drag of your throat, lost in how good it felt to—

Until you gagged.

The sound snapped him out of it worse than the slap. Joel’s eyes flew wide. He immediately tried to pull back, horror flooding his chest.

“Shit—sweetheart, I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

But you shook your head as best you could with him still on your tongue. The movement was weak, but clear. Your hands stayed on his thighs, holding him there instead of pushing him away. 

Permission; clear and quiet.

He’d never done this before, never let himself take your throat like this. The thought alone made his stomach twist with nerves. It felt almost wrong, and so goddamn good he could barely breathe.

But despite those facts, he was now holding your head in place. Then he started to move again.

He kept the first few thrusts shallow, testing, watching your face for any sign of distress. When you only moaned around him and relaxed your throat, something inside him let loose. He pushed deeper, sliding into the fluttering heat of your throat and holding there for a heartbeat before pulling back. Then again. And again. And again.

A broken, awed sound left him. He wasn’t used to this. Wasn’t used to being the center of it all, more willing to give you all the pleasure than to take any for his own. The only time you gave him a blowjob was at his birthday, and that was already a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. Too much for his simple brain, really.

But you were letting him take, encouraging him really. And every time he sank back in, pleasure rolled through him so hard his knees nearly buckled.

Your soft, muffled moans vibrated around his cock, the sound of them only driving him higher. Joel didn’t notice the way one of your hands had slipped between your own thighs, too lost. His own sounds grew into half-moans and half-broken curses spilling out of him between thrusts.

“Fuck… sweetheart—you feel so good. Takin’ me so well… Christ, your throat—”

The pressure built fast, tighter and hotter than he expected. He felt himself tipping over the edge and couldn’t stop it.

“I’m—shit, I’m gonna—” His words dissolved into grateful, breathless muttering. “Thank you… thank you, sweetheart—feels so fuckin’ good—you’re so good to me—”

He kept thrusting through the first thick pulse of his orgasm, then his hips jerked a little too hard. His cock slipped free of your mouth mid-release. Hot ropes of cum striped across your cheek, your lips, the bridge of your nose. 

Joel’s eyes flew wide.

“Shit—shit, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry—” He kept coming anyway, unable to stop the rest of his load from landing on your face, still apologizing between ragged breaths. “Sweetheart, I didn’t mean to—fuck, I’m sorry—”

But you didn’t pull away. You stayed right there on your knees, eyes open and swallowed in the black of your pupils as he spilled the last of it.

Joel stood frozen, chest heaving, hands still gently cradling your head. Water ran down both of you, diluting the mess on your face, but not too much because his body was covering you from the spray.

For a long moment neither of you spoke.

He just looked at you.

And you looked right back at him.

He broke out of his daze, and nearly tipped over with how gleeful you looked. It didn’t take any strength to lift you, even with how weak he was feeling. Your own legs were like jelly.

Joel kissed you. He didn’t care that he was licking at your sweat or his cum. No, he just needed to let you know how grateful he was for you.

His hands were gentle as he wiped your face clean with warm water and careful thumbs, brushing every streak away until your skin was clear again. You just stood there with that content, goopy little smile, eyes half-lidded and happy, like a cat who’d gotten exactly what it wanted.

Joel let out a breathless, disbelieving laugh against your mouth. “I can’t believe that just happened.”

You hummed, still smiling, and nuzzled into his jaw.

Realization hit him a second later. “Wait… you didn’t come yet.”

His hands settled on your hips, and he started guiding you backward, turning you so your chest pressed to the cool glass of the shower door, his broader body warm against your back. One arm already sliding around your waist, the other starting to drift lower.

“You don’t have to,” you murmured, reaching back to rest a hand on his thigh.

“Yeah, I do,” he insisted, stubborn against your ear. “Ain’t fair if I’m the only one who—”

“No.”

“Sweetheart—”

“Joel.”

He paused, lips still hovering near your temple, gearing up for another round of insistence. That was when you lifted your hand and showed him your fingers: shiny, with soft strings connecting your pointer and middle fingers.

You leaned your head back against his shoulder, that classic smile still on your face.

“Might have taken your lessons and applied them. Helped me beat you to it.”

“No, you didn’t.”

“I did.” You shivered like you were reliving the moment. “Seeing you come like that… does something to a woman. I couldn’t help myself.”

Joel’s brows drew together. His mouth tugged down at the corners, pure disbelief mixed with a little pout. “You can’t just—lookin’ at somebody ain’t ‘nough to—”

You scoffed, turning in his arms so your back pressed to the cool glass. “You don’t believe me?”

He hesitated. Joel always believed you, even when it made no sense. Even when it made his ears go a little pink. He exhaled through his nose, “Well… if you say so…”

But you weren’t finished.

While he was still talking, you brought those fingers to your own mouth and slowly sucked them clean. The wet sound of it cut through his rambling. Joel’s eyes dropped to your lips and stayed there, watching every deliberate pull of your tongue. You took your time, making sure he saw the way you savored it.

Then you tapped his bottom lip with one damp fingertip.

Joel frowned.

You tapped harder.

His mouth opened on instinct.

You curled your fingers under his jaw and guided his face down toward yours, closing the height difference until his breath mixed with yours. For a second you just held him there, looking at him. 

Then you parted your lips and spat, a warm string of saliva landing directly on his tongue.

Joel’s whole body went still.

He should’ve been startled. Should’ve pulled back or laughed it off. Spitting in someone’s mouth wasn’t something he’d ever asked for or done, wasn’t something he’d ever thought he’d want. 

But the second he could taste it—your slick, your spit… hell, even a bit of his own cum—something low and hot twisted in his gut. 

The intimacy of it. 

The filth of it. 

The fact that it was you doing it to him.

His eyelids fluttered. An involuntary sound caught in his throat because his cock, which should have been half-soft, was now getting hard all over again. He’d never bounced back so quickly in his life. 

You giggled, “Now do you believe me?”

“I… I…”

“What is it, baby?”

“Yes… yes, I believe you…” He murmured, burying his face in your neck after swallowing.

Your nails traced his spine, holding him in your arms.  “Though… I’m not against you making me come a second time. A redemption. Outside this shower and after we properly clean off. I think we’ve been here for over thirty minutes. Oh, and we should eat something real quick. And pick out a movie.”

Joel smiled even though you couldn’t see it. “Let’s just stay here for a bit.”

“You’re forgetting it’s my water bill at stake. Plus, I thought you were always so money-conscious.”

“Forgive me if I want some rest from the best fuckin’ thirty minutes of my life.”

That earned him a light smack between his shoulder blades. He pulled back, and suddenly, your face was flushed, and he was sure it wasn’t from the steam. “Joel Miller, you dirty dog! Don’t lie, I only sucked you off.”

“You’re all shy now! After you just spit in my—”

“Shush, shush!” You covered your face, squirming as he tried to get a look at your face. “I was lost in the moment!” 

The laugh that went through his chest and echoed out into the bathroom was full and heavy. He liked seeing you shy, liked seeing you flit back into reality. It was hard for him to catch you off guard, and it was oh-so cute when he did.

“Could you—and I’m askin’ this with all the love in my heart—get lost in it ‘gain?”

“Pervert!”

“Look who’s talkin’.”

❛ ━━━━･❪ 🎕 ❫ ･━━━━ ❜

You readjusted your purse, picked up the pink asymmetrical top from the rack, then held it up to Joel’s face.

“How do you think she would like this?”

He raised an eyebrow and adjusted his glasses. “You really wanna know what I’m thinkin’?”

Crossing your arms, you rolled your eyes, “I was asking how Sarah would feel, not her thirty-six-year-old dad.”

Joel hummed in consideration. His fingers ran through the rack of clothing, all different variations of the one you were holding up. Blues, yellows, pinks, and greys. The shopping bags on both of his arms swung around. 

The entire store was mostly empty—thanks to holidays still being in full swing—with only a couple of restockers working around you both. Some pop song played on the speakers above your head. 

Lunch had been good. Great, really. It was like a proper date without a proper title. He had pulled out your chair, ordered exactly what you liked because he already knew, and paid for every bit of it even though you fought back with your own card.

And of course, he had won.

Now, you both were wandering store to store, picking out things that everyone back home would like. You had already finished up shopping for Tommy, Raymond, and your dad. They were really easy to shop for. Lorraine had been a bit harder, but you had managed. 

“Well, I ain’t really keen on her wearing shirts this short—”

“Oh please, don’t act like you didn’t see me wearing worse.”

“Different.” He plucked the shirt from your hand, tucking it under his arm. “My daughter versus the woman I love.”

“And yet you’d still get it for her.” You smirked. 

“Yeah, well, I know she’d like it.” Without a single complaint, he turned sharp and walked to another rack you had been eyeing. You huffed, spotting the graphic t-shirt Joel was eyeing. 

You picked out a style you thought she would like—a graphic of the Spice Girls when they were still together—and a couple more. All of it was piled into Joel’s arms, and he silently followed you.

You and him made your way to the denim section. Jeans, shorts, and skirts all hung off the walls. You picked out what Joel pointed to as her size, and soon, his whole chest was covered by teenage girl clothes. 

As usual, your usual fight over who would pay ensued, with you winning because Joel’s hands were tied up by bags that whacked him every time he tried to reach for his wallet. You happily paid for it all, too glad with Joel’s displeasure. 

The streets of New York City were the same as the store. At least, the best it could be for one of the busiest cities in the world after New Year’s. Even the streets were as clogged with beeping cars and their angry drivers. 

You looked down at the new bag in Joel’s arms. “I’ll call my driver and have him take the bags from us. Won’t take him too long.”

Joel looked like he completely hated the idea. “It seems like we’re… we’re inconveniencin’ the man. I could just carry ‘em.”

You were already pulling out your phone, dialing your driver’s number. “I want to show you a lot of the city today. You can’t do that with all those bags in your arms.”

“It feels wron’ though.” He came to stand right by your side. “Y’know, havin’ someone do all this drivin’ when I could just take ‘em with us.”

“Do you want to?” You asked him honestly. Your finger hovered over the call button. “I mean, I’m not against you carrying it all, but I don’t want your arms to ache.”

Joel pressed his lips together. His eyes flickered around with guilt. You knew him better than the back of your hand. Being served was never something he was used to. Whether it be in your own relationship or in the real world, Joel always had put himself last, but now you were giving him everything he needed to be first. 

Though he eventually nodded. That was all you needed to press call and tell your driver your location. Once you got the confirmation that he was coming, you cut the call and pocketed the phone. 

You bumped your shoulder, tilting him off balance slightly. “You should be excited. I’m taking you somewhere special.”

Joel looked down at you, “Where you takin’ me, huh? Spoilin’ me so much.”

“I know, right? Taking you shopping, having a date, giving you morning head seems like a lot—”

He choked, slapping his chest to get out his spit from his throat. “We’re—we’re in public!”

You looked around, faking a scandalized expression. You placed your hand on your heart as if the stress was putting strain on it. “Really?! You think anyone heard me?!”

“Tryin’ to be funny, ain’t ya?” Joel gave you an exasperated look. “Says the same woman who was so flustered after our shower that you couldn’t look at me properly.”

You hated how a flush crept up to your cheeks, “That was—that wasn’t—”

“See? Don’t dish out what you can’t take.” He shrugged.

“Oh, I’ll dish out something for you to—” 

Before you could finish your colorful sentence, a familiar black car had pulled up. Luckily, your penthouse was close to this side of the city. Joel waved down the car, stepping forward to greet the driver and push everything into the backseat. They spoke some more words before the driver took off. 

You fidgeted with the zipper of your purse while he came back to stand in front of you, hands stuffed deep into his pockets to combat the cold. 

“Now, you goin’ tell me where we’re headin’, or is this ‘posed to be a mystery?”

You smiled and clasped your hands behind your back, already walking toward the direction you had memorized long ago. Together, you both matched each other’s paces, conquering block after block while leaning toward each other naturally. 

“How about you try figuring it out?”

“‘Gain, tryin’ to be funny.”

“Hey, but you—” You point straight at his face, “—are the one who is constantly listening to what I have to say.”

Joel blinked, eyes going slightly crossed as he stared at your fingertip. A heavy look of concern washed over his face, and before you could ask him what happened, he already had your hand in his grasp. “Your fingers are freezin’. You forgot your gloves.”

You glanced down at your bare hands. “Huh, must not have remembered them…”

He seemed offended about that statement. “Here, lemme give you my gloves. Might be too big but it’s better than nothin’—”

“You seem to forget I’ve dealt with thirteen years of New York Winters.” You said it with a twinge of pride as you both stepped down a curb and crossed the road, you on his left side. “You know how many times I’ve rushed to class in my thinnest jacket because my other one was in a washing machine?”

“That ain’t what’s happenin’ here, is it?” Joel retorted. “Now, you got the chance to be warm.”

“Well, I’m not letting you lose your fingers.”

“I ain’t either.”

Stubbornly, you both glared at each other. It was only when Joel relented by huffing and turning his face away. You thought you had won, smiling smugly. You tilted your nose up with pride until you noticed Joel had gone silent. You looked back and…

He wasn’t walking anymore.

Instead, Joel was cursing and moving his hands faster than you could track. He was standing closer to the buildings, not blocking the way of traffic.

You groaned, spinning on your heels to walk back over to him. “Don’t be too mad that I found a way to dodge your chivalrous attempts to be a—”

But before you could finish, you noticed him taking off his left glove. You tried to stop him, but he had already reached and taken your wrist, pulling your whole body against his side as he took your left hand and shoved it into the warm embrace of the fabric. 

Then, your right hand was shoved into his jacket pocket, with his own bare left hand joining yours. Joel’s fingers took up most of the space in the pocket. They were thick and broad and hard, a tell-tale sign of his years of hard work. And those same fingers gracefully wrapped around yours, warming you up.

You blinked at him, and he at you. 

Suddenly, his hand was nothing compared to how hot your face was getting. “Ah—well, your hands are really warm.”

“You’re just now findin’ out ‘bout that?” Joel was the one who looked prideful. 

You clenched your teeth, resuming your walking, but you couldn’t stop yourself from squeezing his hand back. 

Together—hand in hand—you traversed the city once more.

You guided him through the crowded sidewalks, weaving between tourists and locals alike. Joel didn’t question anything, his thumb occasionally brushing over your knuckles inside the pocket. Every so often he’d glance at you, trying to figure out what you were up to but was content to let you lead.

By the time the buildings started thinning, and the air grew sharper with salt, your excitement was nearly impossible to hide. You pulled him down the final stretch, the low roar of the water and the distant horns of boats growing louder with every step.

When you finally stopped near the large glass building, you slipped your hand free and turned to face him. Joel raised a brow.

“Close your eyes.”

He hesitated for half a second, then obeyed, a small, amused smile tugging at his mouth. “You’re really committed to this surprise, huh?”

“Shh.” You carefully covered his eyes with your hands just to be sure, then started guiding him forward. Joel stumbled once, then again, his free hand reaching out blindly until it found your waist.

“Easy, sweetheart,” he muttered, “Can’t see a damn thin’.”

Whitehall Terminal was grand and large, with the words Staten Island emboldened over the front entrance. At night, you knew they glowed blue, but in the day it was turned off. Fewer people than usual entered the building, but the majority of them were tourists. You could tell by the numerous cameras clicking and the ‘I ❤︎‬‬ NY’ shirts. 

You took Joel toward the wall so he wouldn’t get bumped into. You tried to see the expression on his face even though it was covered. “You ready?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.”

And with that, you peeled your hands off his face. Joel squinted, adjusting to the light, but they widened when he saw the building. His eyes darted over everything. More so, he tilted his head when he heard 

“What is this?”

You stepped around him, clasping your hands behind your back, your purse hitting the back of your thighs. “This place? Whitehall Terminal.”

“A terminal for…?”

“A ferry! The Staten Island Ferry.” You waved your hand toward the sign like he couldn’t see it. “It’ll take us over the Hudson River, and we can see the skyline of the city. Plus, I don’t think you’ve seen the Statue of Liberty up close.”

“I haven’t seen the statue so close.” He said with an awe-struck tone.

“Exactly! Which is why…” You took his hand with both your clothed and unclothed hands. You dragged him toward the entrance. “… you’re going to love this.”

“How much are the tickets?” Joel asked. “I can pay you—”

“Nice try, but this is a free ride.” 

You and Joel slipped through the doors and into the large lobby. The chatter echoed throughout the room, bouncing off the windows. You could see the Hudson River, the city, and the Atlantic Ocean stretching throughout the view. 

“Do you like it?”

You and Joel slipped through the doors into the wide, echoing lobby. Voices bounced off the tall windows and polished floors—families laughing, tourists pointing, the low rumble of announcements over the intercom. Beyond the glass, the Hudson stretched out gray and restless, the city skyline rising sharp against the late light, and farther still the open water that would carry you toward the Atlantic.

“Do you like it?”

He didn’t answer right away. His gaze lingered on the water, then the distant silhouette of the Statue of Liberty standing green and solitary against the horizon.

“Yeah… I do.” A disbelieving shake of his head. “I’ve only seen the pictures of her. Feels different standin’ here ‘stead of just starin’ at a screen.”

You watched the way the light caught the lines around his eyes, the way his shoulders had eased just a fraction. Then you reached into your purse and pulled out the small silver camera you’d been carrying all day. It was compact, and a little scuffed from use. 

“Can I take your picture? With the view behind you.”

Joel’s eyebrows lifted. “Me? Sweetheart, I ain’t exactly camera quality.”

“Please?”

He huffed, but he didn’t argue further. He walked over to the window, planted himself in front of the glass, and stood there like he was waiting for a mug shot. His shoulders square, arms stiff at his sides, and expression carefully neutral.

You lifted the camera and peered through the viewfinder. He looked so formal. The same awkwardness you’d always known was there, only more apparent under the bright lobby lights and the open space around him.

“Be more natural,” you said, lowering the camera a little. “Just… just relax.”

Joel tried. The corner of his mouth twitched upward into a smile that came out crooked, uneven, like he wasn’t sure where to put it. It made the whole pose somehow worse.

You frowned. “You know what? Go back to glaring.”

The crooked attempt vanished. His face settled back into the familiar, slightly stern expression he wore most days. It was still posed, still careful, but it was him. The camera clicked softly. You lowered it and looked at him over the top of the viewfinder, something warm and private curling in your chest.

“Lemme take me one of you.” Joel insisted, stepping toward you and holding out his hand. You placed it there, and swapped places with him.

You readjusted your hair, fixed your clothes, and looked back at Joel. His eyes were covered by the camera, but you could see his mouth slightly open. You cocked an eyebrow, “How do I look?”

“Beautiful…” The camera clicked repeatedly, with Joel constantly adjusting how he was positioned. He bent his knees, lifted himself higher, went to the right, then the left. He wanted that perfect angle. 

You laughed at the sight, eyes closed. “You’re putting so much effort into this. I took one picture of you.”

“I got experience.” Joel said while he flipped the camera into a vertical view, “Teenage daughter with her teenage friends? Gives me the best trainin’ possible. Plus, if it means I get to take some of these pictures home with me…”

“Souvenirs?”

“Mhm…”

“Well, at least we should take a picture together.”

Joel poked his head out, then nodded hard. “We can do that.” He came to stand right by you, pressed up to your right. The camera was placed a bit higher than his head, the silver gleaming before your face. 

His picture-ready smile—just as awkward as before—was plastered on his face. You looked up at him, at how his jaw was scruffy and thick. Despite how stiff he was, the twinkle in his eyes was so apparent. It was so easy looking at him. 

You couldn’t help it: you leaned up and kissed his cheek. You didn’t care that it was blurring the picture. You wanted him to know exactly how you felt. 

Joel’s breath staggered a bit, but the clicking didn’t stop. In fact, it got a bit faster. The only reason you were pulled back was that his face turned to meet your lips. Quick pecks were exchanged, and you both laughed. Yours was light, while his was a deep rumble in his chest.

You pulled back, grinning wide, “Liked that?”

But before he could answer, the intercom lit up:

The two-thirty PM Staten Island Ferry is now boarding. Please make your way to the gate, and make sure you have all your belongings.

You looked around, spotting everyone heading forward. You glanced back at Joel, who hadn’t stopped staring at you. “We should head out now.”

“Yes ma’am.” He said with a soft tone. 

Together you moved with the thin crowd through the gate and into the long, slightly echoing tunnel that led down to the slip. The air grew cooler, carrying the stronger scent of river water and diesel. 

At the end of it, the orange ferry waited, its white railings bright against the gray water. You climbed the stairs two at a time, Joel, right behind you, until you spilled out onto the upper deck.

Your chest was heaving a little from the rush when you finally reached the starboard railing. The view opened up clean and wide—no more glass between you and the water—just open air and the city stretching out behind you. The Statue of Liberty stood clearer now.

Joel rested his forearms on the rail beside yours, shoulders brushing. For a moment neither of you spoke. The deck under your feet vibrated faintly as the last of the boarding passengers settled in. There weren’t many; the boat felt almost quiet.

Then the engines deepened their hum, the ropes were cast off, and the ferry began to ease away from the dock, sliding out into the open water of the harbor.

For a long moment, neither you nor Joel said a word. You didn’t want to anyway. You’d rather enjoy the moment in silence with him. Plus, you could enjoy the view on your own. 

The skyline rose in layers of steel and glass, catching the afternoon light. You let your eyes travel across it, naming the shapes without thinking.

There was the Empire State Building, tall and steady near the center, its antenna still catching the sun. A little to the right and lower, the Chrysler Building’s distinctive crown glittered, Art Deco edges sharp even from this distance. 

Closer to the water’s edge you could pick out the Woolworth Building’s Gothic spire, and farther south the cluster of lower Manhattan towers that framed the open space where the Twin Towers had once stood.

You didn’t say the last part out loud. You just watched the light move across the remaining skyline, the way the buildings seemed to lean into one another against the wide gray of the river.

Joel’s arm brushed yours on the railing. He wasn’t looking at the city; rather, he was looking at you. 

“Thank you.” That was all he said.

“For what?”

“For brinin’ me out here.” You nudged your head toward the skyline. “I told you I wanted to travel, see the world. I never thought New York would be the first stop.”

“I told you then, you deserve it, Joel. Disney World, Grand Canyon, Northern Lights, Pacific Coast Highway… you’re going to see it all.”

Joel shook his head, lowering it. His hair was tussled in the wind. “The city seems like a good start.”

“An amazing start. And we barely scratched the surface.” You wistfully looked up at the sky. “There are so many restaurants it would take years to get through them all.”

“We gotta start tonight then. Me, you, some hole in the wall. And I’ll be payin’ for it this time.”

“If you could get your wallet out fast enough.”

Joel chuckled, “Maybe you could just leave your purse at home, then. You’re too quick for me.”

“Again, I’m saying you’re getting a bit too old.” You pushed him with your shoulder. “Think it's time for me to take care of you.”

“Don’t you start with that.” He pointed a bare finger at you. “I’m takin’ care of you for the rest of our lives.”

You blinked at him. “Really?”

“‘Course I am.” He seemed offended. “I’mma take care of you forever.”

“We won’t live that long.”

Joel looked at you through his lashes. “Y’know what I mean. Can’t imagine a world where you’re not by my side, and I’m not takin’ care of you. I know you can take care of yourself—you prove that every day—but it's the little thin’s.”

You tilted your head toward him. “What little things?”

“Drivin’ you to work, watchin’ Friends ‘til midnight while we talk, helpin’ you with your hair… those litte thin’s.”

“Hm… and do you think we won’t have that anymore?”

“If that’s what you want. You said… you said yesterday that you were thinkin’ ‘bout the stuff that comes ‘fore datin’. Then we’d go back to boyfriend and girlfriend.”

“I want to give us more time before we just jump back into a relationship. That’s what we did last time, and that didn’t really… well, you know how that ended. It was a huge rush.” You shook your head and brushed hair off your face. “But I don’t know how that will all work. I mean… you leave in two days, Joel.”

“I know.”

“And when will… when will it be the next time that we see each other?”

He looked away. “I don’t know.”

You pressed your lips together, trying to keep your emotions in check. “And we have whole lives without each other. Me here with work and all the late nights with them. You with the company and Sarah. Just how it was for thirteen years but with us trying to be something more.”

“Y’know…” Joel ran his gloved thumb over his bare knuckles, “For those years, that’s all I wanted. For us to be on good terms even though we were time zones apart. I think I would’ve found courage by then, fixed myself sooner, asked you out sooner. In fact, my whole life would’ve been way different.

“So I don’t want to go back home with doubts. I don’t want to think ‘bout a life where I get back on that plane, and we go nowhere. ‘Cause like it or not, I don’t see myself with anyone else.”

“Joel…” You reached forward, placing a hand on his.

“And y’know ‘causal’ and me don’t work. I’m too fucked up for that. We had sex. Multiple times, in fact, while we’re not datin’. You kissed me too. So it’s either… all or nothin’. I either can’t have you or I’ll will.”

You stared at him, at the emotion on his face. Joel was at his most vulnerable, on this bright orange ferry that was carrying so many. You bit your lip, that same rawness spilling out. “I don’t want to be in the middle. I want all or nothing too.”

“That’s good. We’re on the same page.”

“But how?” You asked honestly.

“What do the kids all it… long-distance?”

You snorted, but it was wet. “You want to long-distance date me?”

“I wanna keep workin’ on fixin’ us for a month or two, then ask you to be my girlfriend. It would be… over the phone, I guess. I would be glued to the thin’.”

He tried to laugh, but not even you could find the humor in it. “And if it doesn’t.”

“It will,” Joel said it with such surety that it shocked you. “If there was one thin’ I could get in this life—one thin’ for sure—I would want ‘nother chance with you. And I sure as hell wouldn’t let it go.”

You flipped around, pressing your back to the railing so that you were facing toward the deck. “I wouldn’t waste it either. I want that life with you, Joel.”

“And I don’t expect you to give up anythin’ for us. Your career, your money, your home here, I don’t want you to lose what makes you you. Our relationship is ‘posed to add to your life, not take away from it.”

You smiled, closing your eyes in bliss. It felt good having him put down that fear before you could even spiral about it. It wasn’t too long ago that men fell for successful women, but then expected them to become mothers and wives. To give up everything they had worked for just for marriage.

But not Joel. No, he wanted you to flourish with him. He wanted to support you. You always knew that, but having it said out loud was satisfying to no end.

“So we’ll try?” You turned your face toward him.

“We’ll try.”

You both went back to the silence. The rush of the river below took up all the space. Coming closer, the Statue of Liberty with her torch waved you closer. The broken shackles on her feet spoke volumes about how you felt many times in this city.

You felt like that now, with Joel here.

Broken free from the fears of the past with Joel. 

With Joel.

❛ ━━━━･❪ 🎕 ❫ ･━━━━ ❜

“You’ll call me as soon as you land.”

“I swear it.” 

“And you have everything, right?” You pulled back just enough to do a quick scan of Joel. “Backpack, phone, wallet, new suitcase I got you—”

“Which I’m still incredibly grateful for. You didn’t need to buy me one, sweetheart”

“—with all the things we bought for everyone… you should be good then.”

Joel smiled, tilting his head. “Thank you for the checkup. Now, kiss me ‘fore I head out.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. Not a single lick of shame existed in your body in the middle of that airport as you leaned up and left a million kisses on his lips. The intercoms blared over your head, stating flight changes and cancellations, and people moved more than usual for John F. Kennedy International Airport. 

January fourth had come far too quickly. Far too fast for you to keep track of. You had meant to soak up as much time as you could with him, but it slipped by your fingers. Days spent waking up late with him, hours getting ready and finally heading outside to sightsee. You finally put your days off to good use; spending the holidays with the one that meant the most. 

 It was pitch black outside—Joel had, of course, picked the latest flight so he could spend the most time with you—so much so that the snow wasn’t visible. You both took a cab, and you held his hand the whole time while your foot thudded against the floorboard. He sat eerily still and quiet, just watching the buildings turn into runways. 

Of course, only Joel Miller could find calm in flying back home after deciding to go long-distance. You barely did relationships, and now the man you just got back with was flying back home. Alone. 

You pulled off his lips to fix his jacket collar. “And if there isn’t enough leg room, or they aren’t doing something fast enough, you call me. I can arrange for a private jet to take you home in about an hour, just say the word.”

“Are you… are you babyin’ me ‘cause this is my second time flyin’?”

“Of course I am!” You huffed. “I hate how you flew for the first time alone. And for me. The least I can do is make sure you’re comfortable.”

“Y’know I would do it ‘gain, right?” He tilted his head down, forcing you to look into your eyes while you were too focused. “I need you to know that.”

Joel’s hands found the expanse of your back. They slipped underneath your jacket and rubbed soothing circles against the fabric of your shirt. Looking up at him, you sighed in relief. “I do know that; it’s just… I get worried, is all.”

“Hmm… well, I don’t think the plane is goin’ down. They gotta have built it properly—”

You smack his chest slightly harder than you normally would. “That’s not something to joke about.”

“I’m sorry.” To make it up to you, he kissed your bare face, moving alongside your hairline and stopping between your eyebrows. “I won’t talk like that.”

“Good. Especially since it’ll be a while before I see you…” You paused, biting your bottom lip. “I’m going to miss you so fucking much.”

“I will too.”

“No, not just that.” Gripping the front of his shirt, you buried your face into his neck. “It’ll be hard. Work, Sarah, everything… I know we talked. We talked all night. But I still can’t wrap my head around the fact you’re about to be almost two thousand miles away from me. Willingly too. I’m willingly letting you go too.”

“Seems like torture for the both of us.”

“Oh, if you only knew. I’d move you here. I’d take Sarah and everyone and give them a fresh start here. School would be good for Sarah, Benji, and Kevin. Business would work great for you and Tommy, and I have connections to get Maria a job. My dad would get amazing care here. Hell, even my mama could find a better facility. Add your own mama and dad on the plan, and we’re set.”

“But you can’t.”

Defeat washed over you. “I can’t.”

“But what you can do—” Joel moved so that your chin was in his hand and he was making you look up, “—is be the amazin’, strong woman I know. Hold down half of our fort here while I manage the other half there. I’ll call you as soon as I land, and we’ll fix up a schedule for when we’ll call.”

“Alright…”

“And I’ll still be vistin’ you. This ain’t gonna be those thirteen years or the last two months. I’ll fly here every once in a while to see you. And you’ll come back home too.”

“Promise?” Your eyes gleamed with hope you didn’t know you could possess.

Joel never looked more sure in his life. “I promise.”

You hugged Joel, trying to keep him as close as possible. He breathed in your scent, pressing his mouth on your head. Whether he was kissing you or just holding on, you couldn’t tell, but you didn’t care either. At least he was close.

You would miss him. 

You would miss his presence pushed up against you in the bed while he practically lay on top of you. You would miss how he held onto you no matter where you both went. You would miss his listening ear that always gave you another side to discussions you hadn’t considered. 

You would miss how he could sharpen or soften you in any moment. You would miss his laugh when it was unrestrained. You would miss the twinkle in his eyes when he talked about the things he loved. You would miss how he loved with his whole being.

You would miss him.

“I’mma miss you so, so much, sweetheart.” Joel’s voice was muffled. “I don’t know how I’m gonna sleep at night. I barely did when you were away.”

“If you keep talking like this, I’m not going to be able to let you go.”

“Is it bad I’m ‘bout to start encouragin’ you?”

When you looked back at him, his eyes were shiny. Unable to see him like that, you tutted and wiped right underneath his eyes, messing up his glasses. He was forced to close one eye with how hard you were pressing into his skin. 

You tried to hold your own composure, refusing to let Joel feel your own sadness. But he caught on, brushing at the corner of your own eyes. You suddenly felt the wetness there, not realizing you had let a tear slip.

“No tears. Be the stron’ one, sweetheart.” Joel said, just in time for the intercom overhead to announce his flight number. You and him jerked back just enough to listen, until it disappeared. Joel looked back at you, “Seems like… like that’s me.”

“It is.”

You both stared at each other before smashing your lips tight together. Joel’s suitcase was forgotten by his side, both his hands locked over your body. 

“Tryin’ to—mwah!—get as many kisses as I get. So it’ll last me ‘til I see you next time.” He reasoned. 

It took force to get him moving. It took too much strength, too, physically and mentally. You pulled back your lips from his. “You have to go, you can’t be late.”

“I know, I know…” Joel trailed off, “... just one more hug?”

You scoffed, “As if you have to ask.”

You hugged him tight one more time, running your fingers over his nape to try and feel the baby curls there. Joel was huffing, clearly trying to smell your perfume and shampoo. 

Once again, it was you who pulled away. It was you who cleared your throat, composed yourself, and grabbed his suitcase before it could get knocked away by traffic. “Go, go Joel. You’re gonna miss it.”

“Y’think they’ll hold the plane for one more kiss…?”

“Go!” But you give it to him either way, tasting salt. 

Joel stepped away from you. It hurt, watching him inch further and further away while throwing glances back at you. Then, he was taking full steps through the crowd, weaving his way to security. He joined the line of bored people waiting their turn, but he looked anything but bored. All he could do was crane his neck to find you so far away.

You waited the whole time as he made his way through. Even though the heater was on, you wrapped your arms around yourself, shivering from his lack of warmth.

Joel was scanned down; his luggage went through the sensors, and nothing happened. Everything went as smoothly as it could, and soon, he was putting his shoes on and grabbing all his belongings from the bins that had reached the end of the belt.

Your heart was in your throat, and your hands inched up to wave him goodbye.

There was no way he would see you. He needed to focus on finding that gate, and he needed to focus on not being nervous.

But Joel always had his way of surprising you. 

He whipped his head around, and through the sea of people, his eyes were locked into yours. His whole arm shook as he waved back. Though you couldn’t see his face, you knew he was smiling. 

You waved back, and it took you brushing your hand to tell him to ‘go’ for him to shake his head and listen. 

Joel disappeared behind the wall, and all that was left was you standing alone. 

You stood there awkwardly for a couple of seconds. People had to scoot around you, muttering ‘excuse mes’, but you didn’t make a move. You waited a bit longer before sighing and turning, heading back for the doors.

The cold air bit at your cheeks, much harsher with the darkness’ help. All around you, life was moving with such haste it was a heavy contrast to you. Cars buzzed through the lane, suitcases and backpacks stood on top of snow, and breath from people lifted to the air.

It didn’t take you long to wave down a cab. The first one that came to you was a bit beat up, but it would work. You got inside, saying short greetings to the driver and giving your address. 

The cab was quick to get through the heavy traffic, getting out of the airport grounds and back into the New York City streets. You watched the city through the windows, that feeling of loneliness becoming your friend once more. 

Though you didn’t last too long. 

Your phone buzzed. You felt it in your pocket. Wiping your eyes, you pulled it out and flipped it open. You frowned, noticing Joel’s name was glowing in the dark. 

Worried consumed you. Did something happen already? You thumbed through all the different screens until you finally logged into your chat with him:

[JOEL]: Made it to my gate.

[JOEL]: It was close by.

[JOEL]: [photo]

The picture was clear; him standing awkwardly in front of the windows that showed glowing runways and planes. His own flight was parked right outside, maintenance working on it. Joel wore a neutral expression with a small smile. He never was the type for set-up pictures. You only got his real smile when it was candid. 

Your heart slowed down, enough to where you could type back.

[YOU]: Handsome.

[YOU]: You look very handsome in those glasses.

Your camera flashed, slightly blinding you as you sent back a picture. When you looked, you could see the faint redness of your eye and the flush of your nose. You still managed to smile for him.

You sent it.

His response was immediate.

[JOEL]: You’re underestimating how strong my willpower is.

[JOEL]: Please don’t cry.

[JOEL]: Not over me.

[YOU]: Have I told you how much I’m going to miss you? 

[JOEL]: You have.

[JOEL]: I’ll miss you more.

[YOU]: Impossible.

[YOU]: If they wouldn’t tackle me to the floor, I’d rush through security and find your gate and kiss you.

[JOEL]: You think I wouldn’t do that too?

[JOEL]: I’m this close to leaving my stuff here and walking back to your penthouse, and get some frostbite while I’m at it.

[YOU]: Sarah would never let you live with the fact you got frostbite over me.

[JOEL]: Then at least she’d know what true love is.

You laughed. 

You hoped he was laughing too. 

But you couldn’t hold onto it for too long. Not when your heart was breaking yet was so full. Like a dam, fracturing and falling apart completely.

[YOU]: I love you

[JOEL]: I love you too, sweetheart.

[JOEL]: Make sure you eat something for dinner that isn’t that takeout crap.

[JOEL]: You should have some leftovers from yesterday in the fridge. 

[JOEL]: And don’t sit by the phone too much and get some sleep.

[JOEL]: Even when I do land, I know it’ll be late for you, and I don’t want you up all night

[YOU]: How are you going a whole time zone away and still finding ways to baby me?

[YOU]: Only you could have a skill like that. 

[JOEL]: Only for you. 

[YOU]: Cheeseball.

[JOEL]: Is that my new nickname?

[JOEL]: I like it.

[YOU]: Do I get a new nickname?

[JOEL]: Honey, sweetie, babe, dear.

[JOEL]: Want me to go on?

[YOU]: Actually, I think sweetheart is the only one for me. 

[JOEL]: Then, ‘sweetheart’, you’ll keep being.

There was a long pause before his next text was sent:

[JOEL]: We’re boarding now, I have to go.

Your heart leapt into your throat as you typed:

[YOU]: Alright, just make sure you don’t forget anything.

[JOEL]: Already padded myself down to make sure I got everything. 

[JOEL]: And remember what I said.

[JOEL]: If you’re tired, go to bed.

[JOEL]: I can still call you in the morning; your sleep matters to me. 

[YOU]: Is it weird I miss your nitpicking as well

A beat of no response, then something.

[JOEL]: Not really, no.

[JOEL]: Cause you wouldn’t want it any other way, you love it

[YOU]: That is true.

[YOU]: I love you, and your nitpicking.

I feel like I'm playing with dolls and making them kiss every time I write smut LMAO. But, about damn time these two have their way with each other!!

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