Try Me
Hate Sex Part 6
Requested: 👍
Summary/Request: Begging for a continuation of the hate sex series 😳 perhaps after the Halloween party Auston starts acting more self destructive (getting into fights etc) and she gets word of it? He ends up in the hospital with an injury and she goes to him? When they talk, he confronts her about sabotaging their actual date and she's kinda stunned at the things she didn't realize she was doing to avoid falling for him? Maybe they have sex with his hand in a cast, maybe not, but either way she agrees to try?🥺
Warning: smut, angst, violence, maybe mention of blood?
Author's Note: Alright my loves, here's part 6 to Hate Sex. The continuation of the last chapter.. sort of. I'm sorry it's soooo long and that it's taken me so long to post it. I had to go back and read the previous chapters to see how things ended up and a lot of stuff has been going on in the last little while since I wrote the last chapter. I think everyone is falling for these two/waiting for them to get together so I'll do my best to get us there. Anyway, I hope you enjoy!
P.S. I had intended for this to feel like it was happening in the present, so when I started writing the last chapter it all would’ve happened in early 2024 and ended around the time that Auston was injured. The start of this chapter would have then been the few weeks he was off just before Christmas. All that being said, I understand that it is no longer Christmas 😂 which means that this isn’t fully happening in the present but hopefully, if I write another chapter, I’ll be able to get the timeline to match properly. But that’s a next-time-problem.
masterlist
masterlist part ii
the other masterlist
xx
Auston’s P.O.V
Each day you couldn’t play was a day you felt like you were going crazy. You’d spent more of your time as Captain on the injured list than on the ice and you weren’t ready for everyone to say you weren’t ready. You were trying to be patient, trying to take care of yourself, so you could be the best for your team but sometimes it was hard to know what that meant.
That’s when you saw it.
@marybrightly: Never a dull moment when the Christmas lights are up and I’m with @(Y/I/H)
Seeing (Y/N)’s smile come up on your Instagram feed, even if it wasn’t on her account, brought back every feeling you’d tried to bury over the last year. You were happy to see her so happy but angry that she was living her life just fine after she pushed you aside. Or maybe you were just jealous that you couldn’t be the one to make her smile, especially at her favourite time of year. You liked the picture but quickly scrolled past so you didn’t go down that rabbit hole but seeing her made you even more eager to get back on the ice, so you could feel normal again.
Going out to lunch with Tessa and Mo was supposed to calm you down. They both knew how you were feeling, so they weren’t gonna harp on when you were gonna get better, and they also knew how complicated your feelings for (Y/N) were, so they weren’t gonna get into that. The only problem was… they were a happy, healthy couple. It came so naturally to them that you wondered why it had never happened to you.
“What are you thinking about?” Tessa asked
“Christmas” you replied
“Christmas?” Tessa and Mo said in doubt
“Yeah,” you continued, “it’s coming up quickly”
“Yeah, couple weeks…” Mo scoffed, trailing his words slightly
“Right” was all you could say
“Oh my god,” Tessa laughed, “either reach out to her or forget her!” Mo just about spit out his drink at Tessa’s statement, laughing as he watched your face shift into defensive mode
“What?” you exclaimed
“You know exactly who and what I’m talking about. It’s (Y/N)’s favourite holiday, you’re thinking about her. That’s fine,” Tessa said gently, “it’s normal. But you’re sulking”
“I’m not sulking about her” you said
“So you’re sulking about not getting to play?” Mo added and you shrugged
“You’re sulking either way” Tessa said
“It’s not like I want to sulk,” you replied, dropping your face to your hands, “it’s just.. if I was playing, I’d have my focus on something other than her. If I had her, and I wasn’t playing, at least… at least I’d have her”
“That’s so cute” Tessa cooed
“So cute,” you said, rolling your eyes, “I just wish I’d have some clarity or some closure from her…”
“So ask her!” she said
“She’s avoiding me!” you replied with as much exaggeration as Tessa
“Let’s be clear, you’re avoiding each other” Mo chimed in
“The point is,” you continued, “how am I supposed to ask her anything when she doesn’t want to see me? When she’s trying to avoid me?”
“There’s always a chance you’ll run into her” Mo said
“I really don’t think so” you scoffed
“It’s Christmas,” he said, “anything is possible.”
xx
When your dad called, saying he wanted to visit you, the last thing you expected was for him to show up at your doorstep 10 minutes later.
“Dad!” you exclaimed, trying to veil your confusion with excitement, “what are you doing here?”
“I told you I wanted to see you,” he laughed, “I don’t know if we’ll be in the same place for Christmas so… here I am”
“Here you are,” you scoffed lightly before going in for a hug, “come in!” It was nice to see him. You didn’t get to spend a lot of time with your dad since you moved out of your hometown, so whenever one of you found an excuse, you always tried to make the most out of your time together; even if he sometimes did take you by surprise. “So what do you want to do today?”
“Well…” he started, fidgeting with his fingers as you sat beside him at the kitchen table, “isn’t there a hockey game tonight?”
“Uhmm,” you hesitated, not wanting to answer questions he didn’t even know to ask, “yeah,” you finally said, “but we don’t have tickets”
“Maybe Mo has extras?” he said, shrugging his shoulders. To appease your dad, you texted Mo to see what he could do, not holding your breath, but Mo got back to you suspiciously fast and said he’d put two tickets aside for you and your dad.
“You’re lucky,” you smirked, “he said he’d put 2 at the will call desk.” He jokingly squealed in excitement and said that he was going to have a nap until it was time to leave. When you remembered that Auston was injured, you took a sigh of relief knowing that you wouldn’t have to see each other; you couldn’t help but be nervous that he would see you, somehow, someway, and he would spiral again. Your dad woke up spritely a few hours later and was already in his jersey, ready to go when he came into the living room.
“Well, look at you,” you teased, “did you sleep in that?”
“No,” he laughed, “I just didn’t wanna waste any time so, as soon as I woke up, I got dressed.” You forgot how adorable he was when he was going to a game ‘in person’ as he loved to say, and you were happy to be able to give this to him - like an early Christmas gift. At the end of the game, you and your dad made your way through the crowd to the parking lot when all of a sudden you noticed you’d lost track of your dad.
“Dad!” you called when you finally saw him staring up at a big screen, “dad, what are you doing?”
“Just watching the highlights” he admitted
“Dad,” you scoffed, “we were at the game… you don’t need highlights. What we need is to get to the car before it’s easier to walk across the city than drive.” He shrugged before wrapping his arm around your shoulder, your face brightening with a smile, your attention only going elsewhere when you heard a small noise echo and you noticed Auston creeping behind a pillar. Suddenly, your mind raced with thoughts of him.
xx
Auston’s P.O.V
You saw (Y/N) laughing with her dad in the arena as the stands cleared out against Chicago. It took you by surprise, just seeing her there, and you followed them, watching them move through the crowd before (Y/N) lost her dad as he stopped for a moment, staring up at a TV near one of the concessions. You continued to follow as the two of them reunited, watching her smile grow wide as she chuckled at her dad’s short attention span. (Y/N) had a way of always drawing you in and this was no different. You couldn’t stop yourself from following them further, eventually hiding behind a post to stop (Y/N) from spotting you; but a button on your jacket pinged off the tin of the garbage can and she looked back, face falling slightly when she finally caught you.
“I uh..” you said as you walked toward her, knowing you couldn’t hide anymore, “I didn’t think… I didn’t think you’d be here”
“Yeah,” she replied, “my dad is in town for a bit and he really wanted to go to a game while he’s here”
“I hope you had a good time sir” you said, noticing (Y/N) furrow her brow, as if to say ‘what are you doing?’
“I did!” her dad exclaimed, “great seats, a win to add to the books, great time. And to top it all off, I get to spend time with my beautiful daughter.” Your eyes wandered to (Y/N) who was, at least in your eyes, trying to plan an escape
“I didn’t realize you’d come out this way… with all the crowds, you know?” she added and it was the first time you realized you probably had been pushing fans aside as you tried to follow (Y/N) through the building. “We really have to go,” she finally said when you didn’t respond, grabbing her dad’s attention by nodding toward the exit. You cleared your throat before saying goodbye and the small hint of sadness that you had when you first saw her was replaced by a sudden urge to punch someone in the face. You knew the feelings you had for her weren’t going anywhere and her inability to admit she had the same feelings for you pissed you off but, yet again, you tried to push it all aside and move on with your life.
She was still on your mind, even after two weeks, and it was starting to mess with your game when you finally came back to the team. You were able to control it most nights, focus on what was in front of you, but tonight, you weren’t paying attention and you paid the price.. twice. One hit and then another and you felt a ping in your shoulder. You tried taking it easy the rest of the game, being cautious, but you didn’t want to give the media anything to talk about, so you didn’t back down. By the time you talked to the press, you knew you’d have to take another few games to heal, you knew that’s what they’d say and you knew it was probably for the best. The frustration and anger it left you with though, lead to your fist flying into the wall and shattering your hand.
xx
Someone had told you that Auston punched a wall and you thought they were being dramatic. Why would he punch a wall? you thought to yourself, that’s so stupid. But you couldn’t deny it when it was right in front of you
“What the hell are you doing?!” you yelled at Auston as he stood outside your door, the sight of his cast making you scoff in frustration, “what do you want?”
“Every time I tell you what I want, you shut me out,” he countered, pushing his way inside, “I want you but you won’t admit that you want me too”
“So you just go and get yourself beaten up?” you said harshly, practically slamming the door behind you
“I mean..” he smirked, as if some kind of plan was working, “if you hadn’t said what you said… that I was too complicated for you, I wouldn’t have gotten into all this mess”
“Are you fucking kidding me?” you cursed, “you’re such a fucking child”
“And you’re a mess!” he shouted
“Oh I’m a mess?” you scoffed, pointing at yourself as you followed him to the couch, “you’re the one with a broken fucking hand but I’m a mess?”
“Yeah,” he said simply, “you think you know what you want but you’re just using me until you fully figure it out”
“That’s not true at all!”
“Oh really?”
“Yes, really,” you mocked his mocking tone
“But you fucked around with me because it was… fun?”
“Just hold on a second,” you finally said, trying to get your bearings, “you think you know what you want? You think you’re ready for what you think you want?”
“What is it you think I want?” he asked, moving slowly toward you
“I think you think you want a relationship,” you replied, “but you’ve been wasting your time with girls for so long that I don’t think you know what it’s even like to date anymore. I mean, take our ‘date’ for example.” Your use of finger quotes set him off in a way you didn’t expect
“Jesus fucking Christ” he scoffed, head falling back and he rubbed his hands over his face, “why are we STILL doing this?”
“I have no idea, Auston,” you replied, “maybe it’s because you’re STILL acting like a manipulative, childish –”
“Me?” he interrupted, “you’re the one who sabotages everything?”
“What are you talking about?!”
“Every single time we.. do anything, you run away,” he shouted and your eyebrows crinkled together, head shaking as you listened to him, “the first time we had sex, ‘it was just one time’ you said. The next, ‘it can’t happen again,’ after that ‘I don’t want to feel anything for you,’ and then…” he hesitated for a moment, composing himself before clearing his throat, “‘I want uncomplicated and that’s not you’”
“I–” you tried to say something but he kept going,
“And the date, the FUCKING date,” he scoffed, gesturing wildly, “I don’t think you even tried to try. You went in thinking it was going to be awful so it was awful. You have this idea in your mind that I’m a certain way and you’re doing everything in your power to make it true”
“You can’t say that it’s not true,” you challenged, “you have no idea what goes on inside my head. You have no idea what I think or don’t think”
“AND WHOSE FUCKING FAULT IS THAT?!” he yelled, veins popping out of his neck in exasperation
“YOURS!” you yelled back and his eyes went wide in disbelief. You couldn’t lie, you didn’t expect to say it, but the words were out there now and you couldn’t take them back; you had to recalibrate. You brought your hands to your face before shaking your head, “you make it so incredibly difficult to feel… normal. Everything that’s normal to me, is basic to you and everything that’s basic to you is overdone, like you’re overcompensating for something. You can’t get to know me because I can’t get to know you”
“That’s fucking bullshit and you know it” he returned, “I’ve always been honest with you. About how I feel, I’ve never tried to be something I’m not…”
“Then why don’t I know anything about you?” you asked plainly, “why don’t you know anything about me?” You waited for him to come up with some slimy remark like ‘we know each other biblically’ or ‘I know the way your body reacts to mine’ but he was pretty silent, though his eyes wanted to say something. “I’ll tell you why,” you finally said, “because we fight, we fuck and we go our separate ways,” the words you said nearly a year ago clicking in your mind and you couldn’t help but repeat them. “Neither of us try to ask about the basic things. What’s your favourite colour? What movie can you watch a million times and never get tired of? Do you love your parents? Have you ever been in love? What’s your middle name?” you continued, “Nothing. Because we’re not here to get to know each other. You think you love me? You want me to fall in love with you? Then tell me who the fuck you are! Don’t have a year long breakdown and get into fights or almost get arrested. I can’t do it. I’m too fucking tired to keep doing it.” You sighed after your last statement, finally walking away when Auston reached out to grab your arm
“Admit it,” he said softly before he caught up to you, “admit that you sabotaged the date”
“Why?” you asked
“Maybe you’ll finally believe it”
“Auston…” you sighed, pulling your arm away slowly and looking at his broken hand. “Look at yourself,” you gestured, “this isn’t all on me. You want me to admit that I sabotaged the date, fine. Maybe I was scared that you’d change my mind or that I’d fall too quickly,” you admitted, “but you were there every time I said things couldn’t go further and you decided not to take it seriously. Now all the fighting? The broken hands and the almost-charges of public indecency? That’s not on me, that’s on your ego”
“I wanted you and you sabotaged it,” he repeated, “I am in love with you and I don’t know how to stop myself”
“I don’t know how all of this hasn’t been a sign to you that we’re not supposed to be together…” you said as he moved closer to you, wanting to be as close to you as possible, and you didn’t realize how much you craved his breath on your skin after all this time – like a question you’d been asking yourself for the last year and he was the answer.
“If you don’t love me, tell me and I’ll leave,” he said and you shook your head
“We’ve done all this before,” you sighed, “had this conversation…”
“Then it shouldn’t be hard to repeat” you met his eyes and the entirety of your time with him flashed through your mind. You thought about how scared you were the first time he gave you butterflies, how you pushed down your desire for him time after time, how you wished that this hadn’t started the way it did, that you could’ve done things properly, how you wished you would’ve stopped it after the first time to stop it from getting this far. You wouldn’t have had to sabotage anything if there was nothing to sabotage but you couldn’t stop yourself; whenever he was around, all you could feel was him, all you could see was him and all your common sense disappeared. It took all your strength to move away but when you finally did, you felt Auston’s chest against your back and your breath hitched in your throat in that all too familiar way and you leaned back into him ‘damn it,’ you thought to yourself, “Auston…” He moved his lips to your neck, kissing up the nape first before travelling to your jaw and you lobbed your head to the side with your eyes closed. It wasn’t long before his hands found themselves on your hips and yours traced down his arms until they reached his, your eyes opening when you felt his cast under your fingertips.
“It doesn’t hurt” he whispered as your fingers moved to his exposed skin before pulling his hand to your lips, wanting to fix his pain even if he said he wasn’t in any
“You need to stop,” you whispered in return, kissing each digit of his hand as you spoke, “settle down, relax, calm down.” He chuckled, gripping your hip with his other hand and kissing the crown of your head gently; these were the moments that surprised you. How quickly he could go from being so intense to so tender
“If that’s what you need,” he smirked as you turned around and wrapped your arms around his neck, “I’ll be so zen you won’t even know what to do with me.” You giggled at his statement, knowing he probably couldn’t get more zen than his usual personality but the thought was cute. You hesitantly pushed yourself up on your tiptoes to kiss him, starting out gently before it turned heavy and he fell onto the couch, pulling you onto his lap, kiss not being broken even as you straddled him. Your hands clutched the sides of his neck as the kiss intensified and his arms wrapped around your waist, bringing you closer to his chest. Your hands moved to the nape of his neck, fingers curling in his hair as your breathing slowed and your heart raced just as your mind did the same before you finally decided it was best to talk this out first
“Wait,” you said between heavy breaths, eyes opening slowly, “maybe we should talk… I don’t know if– I think we’re just falling into the same patterns if we do this”
“What do you wanna talk about?” Auston said quietly, trying to distract you by kissing your shoulders, “how the date went? I think we did that already. Should we talk about why we fall back into the same patterns?” You locked eyes, hands on his shoulders, playing with the seam of his shirt as you tried to come up with any string of words that wasn’t too wishy-washy
“We probably should,” you admitted, “but I don’t know where to start…”
“I can,” he smiled, clearly having had thought of what he might say if this moment ever came, “if that’s okay?”
“Of course it’s okay,” you scoffed playfully
“Okay,” he inhaled, in a playful way, and kept his hands lightly on your thighs, “on my end, I think we fall back into this, into each other, because we’re comfortable with each other. That first time was surprising and unexpected but that’s what made it so… like made me want to come back time after time. Also,” he added, emphasizing the word as if his statement was going to be one he thought you’d challenge, “I always thought you were amazing. I know you thought I thought it was all a game but I wasn’t chasing you. I wasn’t playing hard to get either but I always thought you were beautiful and sexy,” he grinned, the two of you laughing playfully before he continued, “you’re smart and you’re driven and all of that had me hooked. Did I think we’d ever have sex on your dining room table after an argument? No but I’m glad we did. After that, I couldn’t get you off my mind so when it happened again in Vegas, I thought it was the start of something - maybe that’s crazy to you…”
“No, okay, but see,” you said, in a hyper kind of way as you finally moved off his lap, perching on your knees as you continued your thought, “you never said any of this to me. You never made it known that you had any… positive feelings for me before we had sex. There was no way for me to know that you thought I was beautiful or amazing or whatever because you always acted just as annoyed as I was when we were around each other, so.. yeah, it all felt like a game because I had no reason to think otherwise.” Auston jokingly patted his lap and you scoffed in return before shaking your head
“I guess I didn’t know how to say anything because I knew that you weren’t a huge fan of mine,” he admitted, “and I guess I didn’t want to embarrass myself. So I tried to play off you, so when you were annoyed, I was annoyed. When you were mad, I was mad”
“Uh huh…” you replied, confused
“Look,” he smirked, placing his hand on your knee, “maybe it wasn’t the best plan but it was all I had at the time. Then things just started to happen and my feelings got the best of me.” You were happy to have a little bit of clarity, it made you appreciate how confusing things might have been for him when you kept running away only for you to be the one to break every time the two of you were pulled back together. It took a minute for you to do anything, trying to be careful not to cause any more confusion, and when you finally did begin to trace your finger across his tattoos, you couldn’t help but smile
“I’m nervous,” you whispered, avoiding his stare by keeping your eyes down, “relationships have never been my strong suit. Sex was easier, less chance of hurt feelings, but I don’t know,” you admitted, finally looking up at Auston, “I don’t know when it happened but at some point it wasn’t just sex and that scares me…”
“You don’t think it scares me?” he asked, and your eyes darted back and forth between his as he spoke, “I didn’t expect any of this and it scares me that I’ll be embarrassed or that I’ll hurt you - or that you’ll hurt me. I’m not really used to being vulnerable.” You smirked at his confession, understanding now that both of you were in the same place, and straddled his lap once more; kissing his neck as you did so
“I liked when you were vulnerable” you said, whispering into his ear as you kissed the sensitive skin there
“But you never wanted anything from me,” he questioned, “it always seemed like it was just a string of one night stands”
“I know,” you sighed, still kissing around his neck and collarbone, “but that’s only because it felt like the softness, the vulnerability, was a lie.” Your words caused Auston to stop your kisses, making your eyes meet his to explain what you meant, “you’d start off all cocky, like you’d won a game because I was in the room with you, because I was in the bed, or the bathroom, with you,” you admitted, wrapping your arms around his neck as you carefully crafted your words, “then we’d fuck and you’d be gentle with me… until I put my clothes back on and it was like ‘until next time then?’ That’s why it always felt like a game. And look,” you huffed once, “I get it now. I see it from your side but you have to admit, you never said anything about how you felt until you realized I wasn’t going to say the same things. You’re not used to being vulnerable, I get that, but you were and I saw it and I appreciated it. But it was like you couldn’t sit in it for too long, you couldn’t let yourself just be vulnerable unless I was immediately vulnerable back”
“Why was it so hard for you to be vulnerable then?” he questioned and your eyes went wide before returning to normal
“Because I was protecting myself maybe,” you said, “the way we were going about things was always the same and if I couldn’t see you being vulnerable for more than five minutes then why should I?”
“I was vulnerable in the bathroom”
“Yes,” you smiled, laying a light kiss to his nose before pushing your body closer to his, “and so was I… but I knew that it was a bad idea”
“So you sabotaged the date? That’s when all of that happened”
“I made a choice, yes,” you scoffed, “because screwing it up was easier than getting hurt. If it never went anywhere, if nothing real ever started, then it wouldn’t have to end and no one would end up with a broken heart.” He finally looked at you with sensitive eyes, letting his guard down just enough for you to smile and lean in for a kiss
“I’m not gonna break your heart” he smiled against your lips before parting them for a slow, passionate kiss
“Okay, cowboy,” you joked, poking fun at his country-lyric response and melting deeper into the kiss with each breath you each took. Your hands trailed down his torso, slowly lifting his shirt up and pulling it over his head, catching sight of his cast one more time before crashing your lips onto his, “just do me a favour okay?” you smirked, as you tore off your shirt, feeling his hands cup your breasts over your bra,
“Sure,” he said happily, “anything”
“Stop punching walls and getting into fights at bars”
“I don’t usually do that” he replied, his hands pressing against the small of your back to bring you as close to him as possible,
“I know,” you said, pecking kisses jokingly over his eyes and forehead before getting back to his lips, “but just keep the fighting to the ice.” He nodded, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear and kissed you gently. Your hands roamed his bare skin slowly as the kiss deepened and your head felt like it was filled with stars; any decisions made now were done purely out of instinct. You ended the kiss, reluctantly, to stand up and take off your leggings, falling to your knees to pull Auston’s pants down and freeing him from his briefs, your hand teasing his shaft as you looked up at him. Auston smiled back at you as he moved the hair out of your face, holding it lightly in a ponytail and you finally took him in your mouth, your tongue guiding your path as you moved up and down his length. You could feel him pull your hair slightly, so you looked back up at him and noticed that his head had fallen back, leading you to smile to yourself and try to take as much of him in your mouth as possible.
“Fuck” you heard him moan, his hand now gripping your hair tighter. You kept your movements steady, not moving any faster than you had been, wanting to keep him from bursting too quickly, “fuck, baby, fuck” he moaned again, his hand releasing from your hair and you put your hands on his knees to steady yourself. With your mouth still wrapped around his member, you looked up at him with wide eyes, watching as his hand fell onto his forehead in pleasure, leading you to finally increase your movements, your hands moving alongside your mouth until Auston’s thighs began to tense. You moved your mouth away just for a moment, to catch your breath, to salivate, to give your neck a tiny bit of rest, but your hands continued their motion
“You almost there?” you asked with a smirk and he nodded, seemingly unable to speak and you took him in your mouth once more; his cum pouring into you shortly after. You giggled to yourself as you swallowed and Auston picked you up from the floor, kissing your hips as you stood in front of him, a chill rushing over your arms, causing you to shiver and goosebumps to cover your skin
“Come here,” he said lightly, extending his hand to you to guide you onto his lap, “let me warm you up.” Your eyes locked onto his as you lowered yourself, straddling him once more and hands firmly gripping his shoulders when the intensity of the stare became too much. He moved his hands to your waist and the heat from his skin radiated right to your core
“I want you,” you moaned, “I need you.” The words were barely out of your mouth before he started ravishing your neck. His hand snaked inside your underwear and his fingers began circling your clit, leading moans to escape your partially opened lips. The more you moaned, the more he pulled your body close to him and the stronger the sensation his fingers were giving you was. “Fuck,” your head fell back as your back arched into him, words beginning to come out as fractured syllables, “j-e-s-us chr-i-st.” You moved your hand down his body until you had him in your hand, moving your hips just enough to ease him gently into you
“Fu-u-ck,” he moaned loudly, his fingers moving away from your clit to grab your hips, allowing you to bounce freely on his length. You couldn’t help it when your fingernails ripped into his skin, only noticing when a pinhole of blood appeared, and you smirked before apologizing. “It’s nothing,” he returned your smile as you continued to ride him, “it’ll heal.” The pleasure he’d already given you had put you close enough to the edge that you were already almost to your climax
“Fuck,” you repeated, the moans echoing in your quiet apartment, “right there, fuck, yes, right there!” Auston seemed to slow down your movements, pushing your hips down until he was deep inside of you, guttural moans coming from him
“Fuck, you feel good,” he said breathlessly, “where do you want me to cum?” You couldn’t focus on anything other than him inside of you and you started to bounce a little bit until he stopped you and asked the question again, “where?”
“Don’t stop,” you moaned, “cum inside of me” and you were finally let loose, bounding up and down quickly until your climax hit you like a train and Auston’s followed with a quieter impact. You stayed there like that for a minute, with him inside you, as you waited for your heartbeat to come back down to normal
“I want you,” he whispered before kissing your collarbone, “I want you to try”
“What?” you giggled, barely taking in what he said as you lobbed your head to the side
“Try me” he repeated, hands gripping your waist while his lips traced across your skin, taunting you with small kisses
“Try you?” you finally shook yourself out of your trance to look at him, “what are you talking about?”
“We can make this work,” he said, “I want us to make this work.” The look in his eyes was so sincere, it made you want to protect him - as if he couldn’t protect himself. Your thumb gently swiped back and forth on his jaw as your eyes never left his gaze, until you pressed your lips against his and your fingers twisted through his hair; his tugging on your hair being the only thing to force your eyes back to his, “(Y/N)...” he insisted, loosening his grip on your hair
“I don’t want to get hurt,” you said honestly, your eyes dancing across his features and bouncing back and forth between his eyes, “and I don’t want to hurt you”
“Then don’t,” he smiled, kissing your lips gently, “and I won’t hurt you.” It took you a minute but you started to picture it, what being with him might be like. It looked like a lot of ups and downs but it also looked like that thing you’d always wanted but kept missing
“Okay…” you whispered
“What?” he said, surprised
“Okay,” you repeated, “I want to try, too.” His eyes went wide and a smile started to grow on his face, “BUT…” you interjected, “if you embarrass me or I’m made to look like a fool in anyway - if you cheat on me and everyone else knows but me, if you’re saying things about me to ‘fit in with the boys’ - I’m out. I don’t have energy to deal with any of that and I value my peace of mind to waste my time”
“Understood,” he agreed, slowly parting your lips so his tongue could dance with yours, “I wouldn’t have it any other way…”
“We have to go slow,” you said quietly in between kisses, “I might be a little scared…”
“So am I,” he admitted, “so we’ll do it scared, together.” You nodded in agreement, entangling your fingers with his as a smile began to grow on your face and he pressed a small kiss to your forehead. For the first time in a long time, you felt a kind of calm that you hadn’t realized you’d needed until this moment and your mind began to wander. ‘How long would this last?’ you thought to yourself, ‘was this really a good idea?’ ‘would your fears become reality?’ Your face must have been shifting between your thoughts because Auston brought you back, “hey,” he smiled, “don’t shut me out of that mind of yours. We’re in this together”
“Trust me,” you smiled shyly, “it’s a mess in here”
“That’s okay,” he smirked, “I can help with that.”
