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"The Night of the Declaration" part 3

(3) Kensington Manor was not just grand, it was palatial, appearing on the horizon a good mile before the carriage reached the impressive stone gateposts.

“I’ve seen some remarkable homes in my time,” Artie ventured, “but this is indeed stately!” He poked his head out the window and admired the view.

“It has all the mod-cons you can imagine, and maybe some you can’t.” Leroy responded, not trying to hide the pride in his voice. “Mr Fortescue is a true Victorian innovator, and has engineered many things here to run on steam power. He studied the famous British engineer Kingdom Brunel’s work and created some useful devices for the property and the town generally. I’m confident you’ll find it very amenable here, gentlemen.” Jim and Artie smiled hopefully at one another.

The carriage pulled in through the massive wrought iron gates and travelled along a neat, paved drive, coming to a halt under a generous porte cochere, where they all alighted, watching as the carriage disappeared along the rest of the drive and away around the building. Jim and Artie cast observant eyes over it, noticing the teal paintwork and polished brass fittings shining in the sunlight.

“That was sure a cushy fit-out,” Artie said quietly to Jim. “We might have to have a chat to the upholsterers about the train!”

“Don’t get your hopes up,” Jim grinned. “I can’t see the Prez springing for new sofas just yet.”

“Pity,” Artie said, nodding ruefully. “Anyway, let’s see what all this is about.” They followed Leroy Wyatt in through a grand entrance and looked about them appreciatively. They had, in their travels all about the United States, seen some ostentatious, indeed spectacular, displays of wealth in people’s residences and embassies, but found themselves instead entering a space that lacked the dazzling glitz and glamour of those flashy places, favouring in contrast unpretentious good taste and refinement, from the wall colours to the window treatments, the light sconces to the floor coverings. It was all very understated, but neither of them missed the quality in everything around them. There was an atmosphere of reverential quiet, yet both felt that activity was going on just out of sight.

“Feels quite restful in here, wouldn’t you say, Artie?” Jim asked, turning about to get the measure of the place. “I could easily spend time here.”

“I’m not normally one for atmosphere, Jim, I’m sure you know, but yes…it does feel like a nice place, a bit like coming home.” He nodded as his eyes took in the paintings and furniture in the spacious entrance hall. Doorways led off in all directions. A figure appeared at the one farthest from the entrance doors, and both Jim and Artie stopped their admiring to address the older gentleman approaching them with his hand outstretched.

“Welcome gentlemen, to Kensington Manor. I’m so pleased to have you here. I’m Fortescue Weston. How do you do.” His handshake, when he gripped Jim’s hand, was firm, which matched the upright appearance of its owner, and Jim noted with surprise that Mr Fortescue Weston appeared much younger than he’d imagined. Artie, too, showed surprise on his face as he shook hands in greeting.

“Ah, I see, young man, “Mr Fortescue said, turning to speak to Jim, “you seem taken aback by my appearance. Perhaps you thought I was as grizzled as our mutual friend President Grant…?” Before either of the two agents could answer, Mr Weston turned to Leroy Wyatt.

“Leroy, could you please ask Cook to have the afternoon tea sent to my office? I’ll take our guests there and fill them in. Thank you.” Leroy nodded and left the hall. Mr Weston in his turn indicated a different doorway and led the way along a wide and tastefully decorated corridor to a large and sunny office, and pointed to easy chairs near the window, away from the substantial desk along one wall.

[take-note-of-this]

Yahweh and Asherah in the Hebrew Bible

Yahweh and Asherah in the Hebrew Bible

The Death of Jezebel, by Gustave Doré, 1866. From wikipedia.org The Hebrew Bible uniformly recognizes the unique deity of the Lord, the God of Israel who identifies himself to Moses as “I AM” transliterated as Yahweh. Only he is the God of the heavens and the earth, the creator of all things, the sole Lord of the heavenly hosts who sits on his throne ruling over the divine council. In contrast…

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I am very curious about the rewrite of The Nature of Things! So uh, consider this ask an excuse to share whatever really specific thing you want to share about it?

There's so much, but the biggest thing I'm doing (and looking forward to doing) is really... fleshing out the earlier parts of the story. We have so much in the later chapters, and by then I'd had significantly more practice, but I've always felt the earlier chapters were lacking.

It makes sense, given TNOT is the first longfic I wrote and I didn't have nearly the amount of writing experience that I have now. I didn't have the narrative tools I needed to do the story justice, but after spending a year or two working on TNOT and then the last few years writing almost constantly (though most of it is not destined for publication), I've improved a lot.

Now, I feel like I can tell the story I wanted to tell, that I can do it justice properly, and most of my focus has been on the first couple of chapters.

In the story as it was written, it's mostly driven purely by character interaction and thought processes. We really only see Yuuri in relation to Viktor (by which I mean, it's just the way he interacts with Viktor (and Phichit, some) that we see in the first few chapters). I'm working on expanding Yuuri as a person (Viktor, too, but to a lesser degree).

A lot of this means showing Yuuri in different contexts, yes, but I'm also looking to add more depth, both as far as his personality goes and as far as the secret he's trying to keep. I talked so much about the clues Viktor had seen that he wasn't entirely being truthful, and so much about the Yuuri he'd known before, but I don't feel like either of those has been adequately portrayed. I feel like I can do better.

(For example, I have this snippet from the revised version of the scene where reporters show up at the rink:)

When Viktor opens the door, he sees Yuuri still curled up, but playing a handheld game system. Turning it off, he stands up and tucks it into his bag, rubbing at his face as he exits. Then he sees Phichit and his face goes dark. “I'm sorry,” Phichit says softly. “I misunderstood.” Yuuri bites through gritted teeth, “You—you know—” “Yeah, I… I didn’t hear him say it was just a possibility. We can talk at home?” It’s clear Yuuri's trying not to let his anger get the best of him, which is good considering it was an accident, but Phichit looks remorseful, nonetheless. Glancing at Viktor, Yuuri takes a deep breath. “Yeah. Cool. Okay.” He sighs. “I… I need to clear my head. Go for a walk or something. Panic attacks always mess me up.”

For first-time readers, this would make make sense given the assumption Yuuri's anxious and reporters showed up and he's not used to fame. For someone re-reading, or who read the first version, this is going to be understood as Yuuri being upset that he was put in a position where he could be exposed, when Phichit had known it was a possibility. (To Phichit's credit, he really did misunderstand, rip.)

Stuff like this, and also moments where Viktor's watching Yuuri doing something mundane or decidedly un-Prince-like (such as, say, laughing hard enough his drink comes out of his nose) which the reader will be able to look at and be like "Dude you have the privilege of watching the Crown Prince of Akitsushima--hidden from the world--wiping a drink off his face like a dweeb."

I'm also trying to include context of his surrounding life, trying to give a fuller picture of the barista/college student/secretly-rich kid he'd gotten to know. This is definitely going to include more "tells" (Yuuri, a barista, paying his coworker $20 to bus the tables for him because he doesn't want to, because he can afford it, for example) but also more of... him being a part of society. He interacts with his coworkers. Viktor's going to see him talking to teachers and through him, I want the audience to get a much fuller picture of Yuuri.

Additionally, I'm trying to develop both of them more as people outside of each other. In the original, we see a lot of Yuuri when he's focused on Viktor, and a lot of Viktor when he's focused on Yuuri or at a competition (during which he's... also focused on Yuuri).

I'm throwing in more stuff!! Yuuri studying with coworkers!! Viktor going to photo shoots and talk shows and Being A Celebrity. I'm trying to drive in the perceived differences in the first half (World Famous Heartthrob dates Normal College Barista) so the second half feels more like a massive shift.

I say second half but it's more like the other 75% of the story.

I anticipate fewer overall changes in the later chapters, though they, too, will be rewritten (and the political machinations improved).

(Small tangent: everything I fucking write seems to end up with politics involved. I thought TNOT was the end of it but noooooooo I have MDZS fic with politics and that is driving me up a wall why do I keep doing this to myself)

(Tangent over.)

In addition to this, I'm trying to make the change in circumstances and stakes more... idk, is 'brutal' the right word? LOL. For instance, in the revised version of Chapter Six (the chapter where everything goes to shit/Yuuri becomes king) I have him being met inside the airport by security. Viktor figures out because of a news article about increased security at the airport (which, let's be real, would be Big News--increased airport security means Something Big) and Yuuri telling a guard (silently, with a very slight shake of the head) to stop staring at him.

This change is mostly because I just could not see it going down like it had in the original (them letting their Crown Prince, the next king of the nation, who's been at great risk his entire life, walking by himself all the way out to the baggage claim? No, I think they'd want him secured as soon as possible, to have the greatest amount of control over his re-entry into public life.

I know this is very general but it's also getting very long, but like... Idk. I'm really loving the re-write and I'm excited to write it and even more excited to talk about it alskdjfl.

Thank you for giving me the opportunity!!!

[rikichie]

Viktuuri being cute and playful in a pool!

This is a gift for my beloved @we-call-everything-katsudon. The scene will appear in the next chapter of her fic, The Nature of Things, and when I saw this moment with Viktor pinching Yuuri’s cheek and teasing him, Yuuri trying not to smile - I had to draw it.

I love the image ♡

And I adore the author ♡♡♡♡♡

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Too hot to handle…

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Hold me…

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A bit of a handful ..