The Dark Lady and her Beasts
Alpha (II)
Ao3
"He'll...he'll be here right?"
Steve glanced around the cafeteria "Taco Tuesday? Psh, no way he'd miss it,"
"Great...that's great..." Jim shifted in his seat, fidgeting with the envelope in his hands.
Steve kept his eye on the entrances, waiting for...there! At the south doors, Logan heading in with Seamus right behind him.
"Look alive," Steve nudged Jim with his elbow "It's showtime,"
He could pinpoint the exact second Seamus spotted them, mostly because his expression shifted from chill to 'I'm going to kick your teeth in' when he did. Seamus elbowed Logan and then pointed in their direction, Logan becoming equally pissed looking as the two stomped towards him.
Steve had to remind himself that their punches couldn't actually hurt him now as they approached the table. Lake was already shaking in his seat, if he saw Steve lose it it was game over.
Seamus slammed his hands on the table right in front of them, making Lake jump.
"You've got a lot of nerve showing your face here after what you did to my--"
Jim shoved the envelope in Seamus' direction, jumped up and ran off.
Seamus blinked "What the--"
"That's the first part of what Lake owes you," Steve said "Lake told me to tell you that that's all the cash he has right now, but he will get more so he can pay you back in full,"
Not letting up on his glare at all, Seamus picked up the envelope and peeked inside, eyes going wide when he spotted the same fat stacks of bills Jim had showed Steve this morning.
"And...I should have talked to you guys and Lake before just showing up at your party like that, that was...really not cool of me, and...I'm sorry,"
Seamus glanced over to Logan, the two of them sharing a look that wasn't quite pissed wasn't quite chill. He forced back the urge to bounce his leg on the floor, he could already feel his tail whipping back and forth underneath the mask.
Steve really hated it when people had whole ass conversations in front of him without saying a single word.
"Ok guys, this is the part where you either say 'it's cool dude' or you yell at me some more, just pick one,"
Logan groaned, plunking into the seat across from him "This." he pointed in Steve's direction "Is what we've been talking about,"
"...Taco...Tuesday?"
"No you idiot, you!" Seamus dropped down next to Logan, arms folded across his chest and mouth twisted in a scowl "You've changed man, the old you never would have just rolled over like that,"
Steve had to bite back a growl, he could only use the 'voice cracking' excuse so many times "I told you guys I've changed, and old me sucked,"
"No old you was cool," Logan said pointedly "You didn't take shit from anyone and always showed people who was boss, what the hell happened!?"
Blinding pain in his spine and dead heaviness in his legs, fire poker coming down again and again against his skull, his eyes filling with blood
He wasn't going to freak out, Steve was not going to freak out. He was going to sit here and have a chill conversation without shouting or howling or flipping the table over and running out of the room. Even though his fur was prickling up and he could feel his real teeth digging into his lip underneath the mask.
Steve couldn't tell Logan and Seamus about....that. He wanted to, he wanted Seamus and Logan with him, laughing it up together with Steve and Lake and Wang and all the rest of them. He wanted all his friends together, but he couldn't spill everything that happened to them, not yet at least, but maybe....
"So...you know how my dad moved to Texas last summer,"
Seamus raised an eyebrow "Yeah?"
"Well, his work threw him a a going away party, mom didn't go but I did, and the whole time everyone was smiling and patting him on the back and telling him congrats on his new job, but as we were getting ready to leave I went back to grab some more snacks and..."
Despite himself Steve choked up a bit, he could still remember it crystal clear, standing behind the filling cabinet chips stuffed in his mouth and his hands, so desperate to not make a sound he didn't dare to chew.
"Thank god Palchuk's finally leaving,"
"I know, I had to bite my tongue during that whole stupid speech of his, key player in the company my ass,"
"I feel bad for whatever chumps hired him but at least he's not going to be a pain in our ass anymore,"
"Everyone was talking about how much they hated him and they were glad he was leaving, and I....I didn't want to end up like that, so...so I decided to make a change,"
Logan and Seamus were sharing that look again, the one that Steve couldn't figure out what it meant but it made his stomach shift uncomfortably. Like it wasn't doing enough of that already.
What would have happened if he really had died that night, stabbed through the chest and head bashed in. Would anyone have actually missed him? Or would they throw a party to celebrate that he was gone
That's why he had to try, do better, be better, so he actually mattered to people
"Hey it's better to be a dick sometimes than to just fold to anyone who pushes you," Seamus fired back "What have Lake and those losers ever--"
Steve shot to his feet, slamming his hands on the table shutting up Seamus and Logan in an instant. Even with the mask on Steve still towered over them.
He sucked in a deep breath, and very deliberately didn't crumple the table like tinfoil, the crapshow at Seamus' New Years party did not need a sequel. Biting back the urge to roar at them that if they wanted someone who muscled their way into getting whatever they wanted he could fucking do that to.
"Lake and everyone else has done a lot for me, they-- they were there for me when a lot of people would have ditched me! They're cool and the best friends I could ask for! I want you guys to be a part of that, but if you can't be chill and accept the new me then-- then you just can't!"
Too late Steve realized a wolf-like growl escaped along with his rant. Logon and Seamus staring at him in open mouthed shock.
Steve shut his mouth with a click. Not sure if he was about to howl or cry or which was worse, Steve leapt away from the table and raced out of the cafeteria, before he had to see the horrified looks on Seamus and Logon's faces for another second.
