#topian

[incorrectswancrossing]

Topaz: *stabbing the air between Vio and Bryan with a throwing knife*

Bryan: What are you doing?

Topaz: Trying to cut the sexual tension between you two.

Topaz: It isn’t working.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Vio: Keep Bryan away from windows while I’m gone. if you need to pass by a window, crawl on the floor.

Topaz: Seems extreme.

Vio: You’re right. It’s extreme of me to try to prevent the love of my life from being shot in the face by a sniper. Bryan come in here and take your bullet.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Topaz: Who’s the more clingy one?

Vio, sitting on Bryan’s lap, with his arms wrapped around his neck and holding his hand endearingly: Bryan, obviously.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Vio: *sitting on Bryan’s shoulders, avoiding Topaz*

Topaz: You can’t stay up there forever, you know!

Bryan: Yes he can.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Topaz: Is anyone going to tell me what’s going on in here?

Bryan: It’s kind of complicated, but Vio—

Topaz: Got it. Forget I asked.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Topaz: You wanna go get a bite to eat?

Bryan: Sure. Vio too?  

Topaz: Haven’t seen him in a while. I don’t think he’s awake right now.

Vio, in a face mask, from atop the fridge: You’d be incorrect in that conjecture, Topaz.

Topaz: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

[incorrectswancrossing]

Vio: Bryan has such a good heart.

Topaz: Yeah we’ve all noticed you ogling his good heart.

[incorrectswancrossing]

Topaz: What’s it like dating the most powerful living being on earth? 

Bryan: *remembers the time Vio was lying on the couch upside down drinking milk through a straw then waterboarded himself with the milk and coughed for 10 seconds then tried again*

Bryan: ...It’s great.