and if you wind up in the dark again
just turn and call my name
and if the fire in your chest comes out
well, i'll hold you all the same
[small hands by radical face] // [fanart for story by nosho, go and read!]
to dear nosho @creepkinginc 🍏
with my warmest wishes
happy holidays <3
special thanks to ice @spookygingerr and willow @ian-galagher for organizing this sweet secret santa!
happy kinktober everyone!!!! i may not be following the prompts whatsoever, but im dedicating this month to finishing multiple trope mashup prompts for calli! ...unfortunately theyre like 2 years old because i totally forgot to actually write them...
so uh yeah big apologies for that. hopefully my trope mashup ficlets are
these will probably all by trans!mickey btw, because ive lost all ability to write him as not a trans guy
without further ado, heres 2-year-old prompt fill number 1!! rated M, themes of gender dysphoria and self-image, pre-smut, just Ian fawning over Mickey tbh
Looking at him now, it’s hard to imagine Mickey as anything else.
Of course Ian would say Mickey would be perfect no matter what he looked like, but he can still admit the wonders passing has done for Mickey’s health and happiness.
There was a time when the world saw him as a girl. When no matter how loud he screamed or how hard he punched, the word tomboy was still spat out with venom on their tongue. When he felt there was no way to fix what God or the universe or what-the-fuck-ever got wrong when they made him.
Then he saw Colin selling ‘roids to the football jocks. And one session on the library computers later, he learned he was his own goddamn universe and could turn himself into whatever the fuck he wanted to be. He’s leveled up from buying from some college meathead when he was barely fifteen to seeing a real doctor and getting a real prescription filled by a real god-damned pharmacist.
And Ian has been the lucky witness to much of the process, all starry-eyed and cum-filled.
He didn't see the beginning, not really, only from a distance. And some of the middle parts he missed for reasons they still avoided discussing. But what he did witness of Mickey’s transition was sublime.
His shoulders broadened. His arms could carry more and more weight, until eventually he could pick up Ian with little effort. His hands grew rough and calloused, enforcing the threat branded on his fingers.
(He grew his own motherfucking cock. Small as it was compared to other men’s, Mickey was proud of the little guy nonetheless. And Ian was infatuated; called it the “perfect mouthful.”)
Years of do-it-yourself hormones, fistfighting, and hard labor melted fat into muscle. And suddenly, the man he dreamt of being became the man he saw in the mirror. He no longer feared looking down at his own naked body.
And he’s very lucky, he knows it, to never have had a large chest. Understanding he’d never have the money for top surgery without private insurance, Mickey honestly doesn’t know what he’d do if the universe didn’t grant him that one tiny blessing. Binding was for tight-fitting tops peace of mind more than it was for passing.
Besides, everyone knew not to misgender Mickey. He’s sent enough people home with broken bones to be a warning for any transphobe in the South Side.
It's difficult to think he used to share bras with Mandy. Not just because of the repressed, painful memories of going through puberty as a girl in the Milkovich house. Because he hasn't been that person for so long, physically or psychologically. He's forgotten what it was like. Trying to remember his early teen years before discovering testosterone is the same as flipping through the television channels. Like staring in a two-way mirror; it's a different life on the other side.
So Mickey can confidently say he feels and sees himself as a man, and has for quite a few years. Especially with Ian’s help - an unconditional love for every version of Mickey’s body that borders on obsession.
Still, he knew he could bulk up even more. Especially now that Ian's gained his post-wedding “happy weight,” as they call it, their size difference has almost become a nuisance, more comical than sexy. And Ian is always on his ass about making more conscious health decisions.
He may still refuse to eat whatever the fuck kale is, but there are other sacrifices Mickey is willing to make.
Once Mickey realized the torture of exercising was outweighed by the results, it was over for Ian. He knew he'd never finish a full routine for the rest of his married life.
Such is the privilege of a 24-hour gym included in apartment rent, they choose to go only when it's empty. For reasons exactly like right now.
Ian is desperately trying to complete his reps on the rowing machine, Mickey stationed as usual by the dumbbells, bench pressing with his legs spread as if he's purposefully trying to get Ian hard.
And then he goes and does this.
Ian witnesses Mickey pull his tank top off, watches sweat drip and muscles ripple without any fabric blocking the view, sees his nipples harden and light dusting of chest hair stand on end when exposed to the air, sees that tiniest bit of a jiggle as he does his reps.
Ian is fucking gone.
He stops his workout entirely to focus solely on ogling his husband, hoping to get caught so they can lock eyes and silently agree to fuck in the showers again.
Last time was absolutely unforgettable: Mickey sticking out his toned ass, balancing on his toes, groans and begs to be cum into just loud enough to hear over the cascade of water encapsulating them.
Fuuuuck… how did he get so lucky?
“The fuck you looking at, bitch?"
The pissed off sounding voice knocks him to reality but when his eyes refocus, Ian sees the smirk painting his husband's bitten-red lips.
He has to move now.
Has to reach Mickey before Mickey reaches him because God knows how Ian’s brat of a husband acts when he thinks he has the upper hand.
They meet on top the weight lifting mat, Ian's hands on Mickey's chest before any other part of them touches.
He has to squeeze, getting the perfect handful, feeling fat and muscle mold perfectly to the shape of his palms.
“Fuckin’ checking you out, bitch. What, you gotta problem with gay guys?”
They look each other up and down, two predators hunting for their next meal. Mickey hums.
“Yeah I do, when they can't put their money where their mouth is. You got the dick to back up that attitude?”
Ian tugs Mickey's nipples, pulling him a half step closer, whispers his next words directly into his husband's mouth.
“Think you already know the answer to that, based on what we did all morning.”
Mickey doesn't shy away from his touches. Doesn't push Ian away. Doesn't tell him to stop.
Only puffs his chest out like the proud man he is and smiles brilliantly.
“Think you might need to remind me, lover.”
Exactly ten minutes later, they're kicked out of the locker room by an (un)lucky gym attendant.
Three weeks of being lost in the thicket. Three weeks of thorns in his skin and mud soaked clothes. Three weeks of lights in the corner of his eye that always vanished without a trace when he so much as turned his head.
Twenty-one days of thinking he was going fucking insane.
A frustrated growl slipped through Mickey's lips.
Enough was enough.
"Where are y- … fuck, man, I don't even know your stupid name."
He barely had any time to register the gentle breath ghosting over the shell of his ear.
"That's because you never asked."
--- and if you wind up in the dark again (just turn and call my name)
story by Nosho @creepkinginc
art by Alice @darthvaders-wife --- Twitter Redbubble Instagram Patreon BuyMeACoffee Commissions info Ao3 Boosty
is tumblr!mickey trans? I was looking at the tumblr blogs for him and ian and they both mention that he is trans and there are questions asking about his pursuit and whether mickey thinks about if getting surgery. However, there's no reference to him being trans in the fanfic so I was unsure.
I just want to make sure I understand the characters correctly because somehow I'm only just now finding this series and am enjoying the fanfic and art.
hi anon! this is a super valid question!
when tumblr!mickey was first dreamt up by @breedxblemickey @ianandmickeygallavich & a slew of anons -- truly a team effort that you can read all about HERE -- he was cis like in canon. there have been a handful of fics, mine included, that have kept him this way:
hornygaythug.tumblr.com by papayawitch
@/hornygaythug by @whatthebodygraspsnot
(g)loved up & flip fuck? by me
then, actual tumblr blogs for ian & mickey (@/hornygaythug & @/9inchredhead) were made by some incredible creators in the fandom, & that iteration of tumblr!mickey is trans! there was a lot of Very Important discourse about the need for more trans!mickey content around the last spicy collab & a fic was also written that took that route:
In The Midnight Hour by @lesbiangallagher
in my humble opinion, all tumblr!mickeys are incredible tumblr!mickeys & it's been so fun to see this fandom come together to explore all of the different versions of him! there are even multiple RP blogs now on tumblr -- @/hornygaythug, @/hornygaythugg & @/hornygaythuglife !!! sweet, right?
i hope this answers your question! i think with this character in particular, cis/trans/not specified depends on the creator!
thanks anon! xx
ps. if you're in the market for more trans!mickey content, be sure to check out:
Strangers on a Train & Blackout by @thisdivorce & @breedxblemickey (with a part 3 coming atcha this week!!!!)
Pride by @you-show-me-love
hard to find how i feel by pinkpantherman
Gallavich Porn Gallery (nsfw art) by @psychicskulldamage
Every Last Part of You by @depressedstressedlemonzest
a grip on his heart (and his hips) by redroads
SHIT SHOULD I DO A REC LIST ON @slim-jims-in-this-shit-hole ???
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Shameless (US)
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Characters: Mickey Milkovich, Ian Gallagher
Additional Tags: April Fools' Day, Pranks, Sexual Content, Trans Character, Fluff
Series: Part 21 of Trans Mickey
Summary:
Mickey is a prankster and has a little fun with Ian, who is totally into him.
messy af au where ian and mickey meet in prison. ian of course for gay jesus and mickey for assault with a deadly weapon and public indecency (a transphobic coworker kept making comments about "whats in your pants" so mickey decided to show him and then promptly beat him with a wrench) theyre cellies and theyre avoiding each other like the plague because mickey and lip worked at the repair shop together. also because they kissed once in like 5th grade and mickey lowkey never forgot about ian since then. and he was also jealous as fuck when he heard ian was running an lgbt+ homeless shelter with his trans boyfriend. well the avoidance doesnt last very long once mickey goes for his weekly T shot and sees the new infirmary nurse whos in charge of administering his hormones
today i am thinking about trans!mick letting franny paint his nails and put costume makeup on him. she only knows him as male, and she's so young and doesn't understand gender anyway, let alone dysphoria. the first few times it happened, ian saw the hesitation in mickey, so he jumped in and volunteered to be franny's makeup model. and everyone loves it! ian is so silly and soft and great with kids and franny loves playing with him... but mickey just felt weird about the whole situation. not counting Mexico, he hadn't worn makeup since he let Mandy play with him when they were young, barely starting puberty and not yet fully aware of his identity.
he was scared. he was scared of makeup. and the ian that lived in his brain was saying "it's okay to be scared!! you can't control what triggers your dysphoria!! you're allowed to be uncomfortable!!" and yet... part of him felt it was all so ridiculous. he's scared of, of what? some dyes and paint? who gives a shit? wearing makeup wouldn't make him less of a man, so why does he still feel that way? ian does it, and nobody misgenders him or calls him less manly for playing with his niece. he's safe. he's safe here, with his chosen family who haven't given him shit for his identity in over a decade - and even then it was from ignorance rather than malice. if he wants to play dress-up and makeup artist and tea party with his niece, that's just as valid as playing liquor store robbery. he can do both. he can afford to be both now.
so he lets franny paint his fingers and toes; blue, because she said it matches his eyes. and he tries to sit still while she applies purple eyeshadow and red blush and sparkly pink gloss. it tastes like bubblegum, like the Lipsmacker he stole from mandy's room in 4th grade. and he may need ian to buy nail polish remover from CVS in a couple days, when the aching in his gut creeps in again. but for now, he can definitely let franny play and treat him just like she would any other uncle.
