hey, auden. if you're reading this, i miss you. i was too in love with you to be embarrassed of saying it then, so i'll hold off on being embarrassed now: you were and are my soulmate, and i'm forever grateful for the time we had together, even if it wasn't long. i've never met someone and just known we were meant to be together before, but you changed everything for me, you know that? you made it feel natural. i remember sitting in my apartment together with the sunlight streaming in. we were sitting together in the front room and i knew that that's how we were meant to be. i don't know if i ever told you this, but i was thinking about how just that moment with you would be enough. any suffering that came down the line would be worth it to just have that one moment with you. i was more than lucky; we had plenty of moments like that before the camerata tore it all apart. even when i was fighting my way through cloudbank, even when we were both dead, i was thinking of that moment. i was right, babe. it was more than enough.
i'm doing good in this life. i know that you worry. i promise i'm taking care of myself this time around. please do the same, okay? i'm still out here looking for you. even if i don't find you in this life, i'll search for you in the next one.