#iwtv#interview with the vampire#amc tvl#sam reid#jacob anderson
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post-surgery advice: if you're supposed to be rotating painkillers, a chart like this is really useful (esp. if you have a shitty memory). Don't wait to take something until it really hurts; you gotta stay on top of it. Also if you were intubated during the surgery, have a box of numbing throat lozenges ready for after and figure out a non-verbal communication method for the next 48hrs or so bc your throat will most likely Not be Happy.
ugh i can't wait to be able to just /dance/ without constantly feeling my chest jiggle it's like the closer the surgery date gets the more intolerable everything is
five weeks 'til top surgery aaaahhhh
becoming the Threatening Other in strangers' minds is such a surreal experience
My mom keeps trying to get me to admit I'm transitioning without having to actually say any of the words, and I continue to wait her out until she sucks it up and just asks the damn question already. I'm being about as obvious as I can be without making any formal announcements (I hate making a big deal out of stuff like this); I refuse to confess it like some dirty secret or crime. I learned my passive-aggressiveness from her so it's not like she has much of a leg to stand on, and I am So Tired of dealing with it.
well this certainly moves changing my legal name and gender marker on all my gov’t documents right the fuck up my list of priorities
things hrt was supposed to do: make my skin thicker, rougher, and less sensitive
things hrt has actually done: my skin is still sensitive as hell, it just has more things to be Angry about now
...i just realized i can feel where the different heads of my quadriceps transition to the tendons that connect them to my knees. i can feel where my biceps and triceps cross over/around my deltoids. i can flex my pecs separately, and see them move under my skin in the mirror. i don't care if i never get rid of this minor spare tire (well, i do, but that's a different issue); as somebody who's never been able to feel or build up their muscles for ~93% of their lives, this has been worth it so far just for how neat this is. I've never been what anybody would consider "fit" (and don't have any sort of "fitness routine" to speak of besides working grocery retail and walking home from work a couple days a week); how do fit ppl ever get anything done with all those muscles they could be exploring? do they ever just...get lost in how all the different bits fit together under their skin? i already have plenty of trouble on a daily basis just resisting the urge to contemplate my hands
