📖 殘酷繪本劇場：【我要找回我的女朋友】
原案參考： 雍．卡拉森 (Jon Klassen) ——《我要找回我的帽子》 主演： 戴著橘色螺旋面具的男人 (🐻) 背景： 冰冷的慰靈碑前、神威空間、血色的雨夜
🎨 繪本分鏡與對白
（第一頁） 畫面上是一個戴著面具、渾身縫補痕跡的男人。 他呆坐在血泊中。 「我的女朋友不見了。我想把它找回來。」
（第二頁） 他遇見了一個遮著左眼、滿頭銀髮的男人（卡卡西）。 「請問，你有看見我的琳嗎？」 「我……我沒能守住她。她死在了我的雷切之下。」 「喔。好吧。那不是我要的答案。」 男人轉身走入漩渦，留下一臉崩潰的卡卡西。
（第三頁） 他遇見了一群穿著紅雲黑袍的人（曉組織）。 「請問，你們有看見我的琳嗎？」 「我們只看見了痛苦和錢。快去抓尾獸吧，阿飛。」 「喔。好吧。謝謝你們。」 男人在心裡想：等你們沒用了，我就把你們全部塞進垃圾桶。
（第四頁） 他遇見了一對閃耀著金色光芒的夫婦（水門與玖辛奈）。 「請問，你有看見我的琳嗎？」 「帶土？是你嗎？快停下九尾，木葉快要毀滅了！」 男人冷冷地看著他們。 「我問的是琳。既然你們沒看見，那就和這個世界一起消失吧。」 「喔。好吧。再見。」
（第五頁） 他遇見了一個孤獨地坐在鞦韆上的小男孩（鳴人）。 以及一群對著男孩指指點點、眼神冰冷的高層與村民。 「請問，你們有看見我的琳嗎？」 「我們正忙著討厭這個怪物小鬼。別擋路！」 男孩看著男人，眼神裡充滿了恐懼。 「這個世界果然是個垃圾場。連我的琳都藏起來了。」
（第六頁：轉折點） 男人跪在一個枯槁的老頭（宇智波斑）面前。 「班大人。我找不到我的琳。這個世界把她藏起來了。」 斑露出了陰冷的微笑： 「我能幫你找到她，帶土。只要你聽我的話，創造一個新的世界。」 男人那隻發光的眼睛睜得大大的。 「真的嗎？那太好了。」
（第七頁：深紅色的回憶） 男人突然站了起來。他的身體開始顫抖。 「等一下。」 「我剛才遇見了一個人。」 「他身上穿著我送他的眼睛，但他手裡穿透了琳的心臟。」
（第八頁：全黑的畫面） 只有一圈螺旋狀的裂痕，以及壓抑的、木頭摩擦般的啜泣聲。 「吸……吸溜。」
（第九頁：結局） 男人坐在月亮下的神威空間裡。 周圍堆滿了被他傷害過的、支離破碎的人影。 另一個路人（黑絕）走過來問：「請問，你有看見剛才那些礙事的人嗎？」 男人直勾勾地盯著前方，唯一的眼睛發著紅光： 「我沒看見。我什麼都沒看見。我再也沒看見任何真實的東西了。別再問我了。」
📊 繪本風格解構：【宇智波式崩潰】
元素 繪本原著風格 帶土版 (火影) 心理恐怖感 反覆詢問 「你有看見我的帽子嗎？」 「你有看見我的琳嗎？」 執念導致的現實扭曲感。 人類的冷漠 忽視熊的人類。 欺淩鳴人的村民、冷酷的高層。 證明了帶土毀滅世界的「合理性」。 班的角色 (原著無) 唯一的「幫助者」。 最深的謊言，引導他走向深淵。 結局處理 熊吃掉了兔子。 帶土抹殺了現實。 所有人都在幻術中「找回」了東西，卻失去了靈魂。
🌅 劇場小結
這本名為《我要找回我的女朋友》的繪本，在木葉的地下檔案室裡被列為禁書。每個翻開它的人，都會在最後一頁看見自己被吸入螺旋的殘像。
梅利奧達斯： (吸——溜！) 「吸……吸溜。帶土，這本繪本的結局比我的還黑暗呢。你找回了琳，但你卻把整個世界都弄壞了……嗚⋯呼⋯嗚⋯呵👁️💧💧」
帶土： (坐在廢墟上) 「那是必然的（そうだよ）。既然現實不給我琳，那我就去班大人的夢裡找。誰敢擋路，我就讓誰變成繪本裡的灰塵。吸溜……」
你想看看當鳴人長大後，拿著這本繪本走到帶土面前，對他說「我找到你的帽子了，那是我們大家的未來」時，帶土會不會氣到把繪本撕成碎片？
📖 Cruel Picture Book Theater: [I Want My Girlfriend Back]
Original concept reference: Jon Klassen — "I Want My Hat Back"
Starring: Man in an orange spiral mask (🐻)
Setting: In front of a cold memorial stone, Kamui dimension, blood-red rainy night
🎨 Picture Book Storyboards and Dialogue
(Page 1)
The image shows a masked man, covered in stitches.
He sits blankly in a pool of blood.
"My girlfriend is gone. I want her back."
(Page 2)
He meets a silver-haired man with his left eye covered (Kakashi).
"Excuse me, have you seen my Rin?"
"I… I couldn't protect her. She died by my Chidori."
"Oh. Okay. That's not the answer I'm looking for."
The man turns and walks into a vortex, leaving a distraught Kakashi behind.
(Page 3)
He meets a group of people in red cloud black robes (Akatsuki).
"Excuse me, have you seen my Rin?"
"We only see pain and money. Go catch the Tailed Beasts, Tobi."
"Oh. Okay. Thank you."
The man thinks to himself: Once you're useless, I'll throw all of you in the trash.
(Page 4)
He meets a couple shining with golden light (Minato and Kushina).
"Excuse me, have you seen my Rin?"
"Obito? Is that you? Stop the Nine-Tails, Konoha is about to be destroyed!"
The man looks at them coldly.
"I asked about Rin. Since you haven't seen her, then disappear with this world."
"Oh. Okay. Goodbye."
(Page 5)
He meets a lonely little boy sitting on a swing (Naruto).
And a group of high-ranking officials and villagers pointing at the boy with cold eyes.
"Excuse me, have you seen my Rin?"
"We're busy hating this monster kid. Don't block the way!"
The boy looks at the man, his eyes filled with fear.
"This world is indeed a junkyard. It even hid my Rin."
(Page 6: Turning Point)
The man kneels before a withered old man (Uchiha Madara).
"Lord Madara. I can't find my Rin. This world has hidden her."
Madara reveals a sinister smile:
"I can help you find her, Obito. As long as you listen to me and create a new world."
The man's glowing eye widens.
"Really? That's great."
(Page 7: Crimson Memory)
The man suddenly stands up. His body begins to tremble.
"Wait a minute."
"I just met someone."
"He was wearing the eye I gave him, but his hand pierced Rin's heart."
(Page 8: All Black Screen)
Only a spiral crack, and a suppressed, wood-rubbing sob.
"Sniff… sniffle."
(Page 9: Ending)
The man sits in the Kamui dimension under the moon.
Around him are scattered, broken figures of those he hurt.
Another passerby (Black Zetsu) walks over and asks: "Excuse me, have you seen those annoying people from earlier?"
The man stares straight ahead, his single eye glowing red:
"I didn't see them. I didn't see anything. I haven't seen anything real anymore. Don't ask me again."
📊 Picture Book Style Deconstruction: [Uchiha-style Breakdown]
| Element | Original Picture Book Style | Obito Version (Naruto) | Psychological Horror |
| --- | --- | --- | --- |
| Repeated Questioning | "Have you seen my hat?" | "Have you seen my Rin?" | Sense of reality distortion caused by obsession. |
| Human Indifference | Humans ignoring the bear. | Villagers bullying Naruto, cold high-ranking officials. | Proves the "rationality" of Obito's world destruction. |
| Madara's Role | (Not in original) | The only "helper." | The deepest lie, leading him to the abyss. |
| Ending Treatment | The bear eats the rabbit. | Obito erases reality. | Everyone "finds" something in the genjutsu, but loses their soul. |
🌅 Theater Summary
This picture book titled "I Want My Girlfriend Back" is listed as a forbidden book in Konoha's underground archives. Everyone who opens it will see their own afterimage being sucked into a spiral on the last page.
Meliodas: (Sniff—sniffle!) "Sniff… sniffle. Obito, the ending of this picture book is even darker than mine. You found Rin, but you ruined the whole world…嗚⋯呼⋯嗚⋯呵👁️💧💧"
Obito: (Sitting on the ruins) "That's inevitable (そうだよ). Since reality won't give me Rin, I'll find her in Lord Madara's dream. Anyone who stands in my way, I'll turn them into dust in a picture book. Sniffle…"
Do you want to see if Obito would be so angry that he'd tear the picture book to shreds when Naruto, grown up, walks up to him with this picture book and says, "I found your hat, it's our future"?
