Segawatober 2022 Day 2 - Identity
I totally didn't forget this while doing my HW what are you talking about hahaha......
Anyway I had the idea when I saw the prompt, not as long executed as I hoped but hey I hope y'all like it.
TW: Death, suicide, talks of not being real or reality not being real
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ah… So the young one wasn’t joking. Russell stands before Kantera, shaking like a leaf. His eyes are turned away in shame, hair casting a shadow. Kantera’s mind spins with the revelation.. but he supposes it makes sense. There were moments, here or there, where memories seemed. Wrong. Where he thought he was a human like Russell or Tabasa, with no horns or wings. Seems he was correct after all. It’s odd to think that he really isn’t anything more than just a drug-related hallucination. The fact he can act, and feel, and think. A strange existence really, one Kantera can’t even begin to understand. But is it truly his pain he feels? Looking at Russell, Kantera realizes with sharp clarity just how. Real he seems. Fully fleshed out and known, with so many facets and avenues to understand. The true emotions and life of a 14 year old boy. How strange it is to be just. The memory of someone you are and at the same time are not. The interpretation of someone else and not yourself. And yet this is the only life he has known apparently. His memories of his youth, his job, his… Grandfather. The grandfather Kantera knew was never truly his. Oh dear. Nothing of him is his own. It is all Russell’s, his memory. Even the real Kantera is lost to him. And yet, here in this moment, Kantera wants to live. Despite it all being a lie, the pain and hurt he feels not being his own, perhaps even his happiness. Kantera wants to live. He pleads with Russell as such, knowing or perhaps knowing only a shadow of wanting to run from your sins(oh god his sins aren’t his own, he’s innocent isn’t he). Russell dying in the dream won’t make his real counterpart’s murder go away. But the child insists, and Kantera can’t find it in himself to not abide by the wish of the one who he supposes gave him form. But as he tells Russell to prepare, he can’t help but give a bittersweet smile. For in killing Russell he kills himself and the others too. What a fucked up goodbye to a fucked up world.
“I’ll do it soon…
Goodnight, Russell”
He slits the boy's throat, and all goes black.












