Summary: You trust Dean with your life, he doesn’t even trust you with his car. All choices in life have consequences - Deans have much worse...
Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam Winchester, Jo Harvelle, Crowley, Castiel
Warnings: angst, comforting, fluff, a hint of making out, language and a flirty Dean, implied characters death
Set in Season 9 and 12. Jo and Ellen never died in Season 5.
Trust Masterlist
Two days of non-stop research later you didn’t find anything. There were no hex bags in Jo’s room, no cursed objects or shady persons she met up with.
“Anything?” Groaning you get up to stretch your sore body, not missing the way Dean ogles your ass or the silent growl leaving his lips. “Dude, stop staring at my cute ass!”
“It’s mine. You gave it to me.” Pointing at the contract Dean always seems to carry in his pocket the hunter smirks. “I only want to make sure your ass is safe, Sweetheart. It would be a great loss to me.”
“Dean Winchester, can you not be a perv for a split-second?” Starting to laugh you sit onto the table slapping your palms onto the wood. “I mean – we try to find out if the chick drugging you to use your sexy body was influenced by the evil and you only can think about my ass.”
“As I said – it’s a nice ass, Sweetheart.” Playfulness in his tone Dean licks his lips as you crawl onto his lap. Legs placed on each side of his thighs you lean closer to bury your face into Dean’s neck. “Y/N?”
“Shh…let me think about a possibility to find out if I need to roast Jo’s ass or not. Let me focus.” Nibbling at Dean’s neck you sigh against his skin. Dean doesn’t know Castiel was able to suppress all the fake memories the demons planted into your mind.
“How do you feel?” Dean tries once again but you ignore his words, only snuggle closer into his warm chest. “Y/N…?”
“Let me…uh…” Gulping Dean tries to ignore his body reacts to your closeness. “I want to end this part of my life once for all. Therefore I need to handle the whole Jo situation too.” Dean’s hands wander to your ass, squeezing it tightly.
“I really like your ass…” Chuckling Dean let you bite his neck to leave a mark. “Like the rest too…”
“Maybe I like your ass too, even knowing you can be an ass sometimes. Now let me think…” Resting your head against Dean’s shoulder you close your eyes to recall the days before you got captured by the demons.
“Sammy is checking on Jo with Castiel, trying to find out if we can help her with the torn soul we put back into her body.” Dean waits for your reaction, but you can’t feel compassion for Jo.
“I tried to remember when Jo started being mean to me but honestly she was a bitch from the moment we met. I assume she didn’t like you dragged me around.” Dean squeezes your butt with one hand as the other fumbles his phone out of his pocket.
“Maybe she was jealous, knowing I have a thing for your cute ass and more…” Dean husks as you take his phone to look at the pictures he saved.
“You goddamn pervert took pictures while I was sleeping?” Scrolling through the pictures you gasp now and then. Dean even took a picture as you were stroking a dog or when you tried to fry a pancake and failed.
“I liked taking pictures of you. It was my way to have a piece of you. Helped me through the years you were missing, Y/N.” Dean licks his lips as you grab the hem of his shirt, forcing him to meet your eyes.
“Did you take one when I was naked too?” Searching Dean’s face, you chuckle as his cheeks heat up.
“I swear I would never cross that line without your consent. I’m a perv, not a goddamn bastard.” Muttering under his breath he tilts his head to stare at your breasts. “I have to admit I’d like to have one or two of your cute ass and more.”
“Careful now, Winchester…” Poking a finger into Dean’s chest you narrow your eyes. “I’ll let you take one of my cute ass if I get one of yours in return.” Bringing your flirting to a whole new level you lick your lips.
“Damn, get out of your clothes and we can…” Dean curses as Sam and Castiel enter the library right when you were ready to let him have a glimpse at your cleavage.
“Y/N…uh…” Scratching his chin Sam looks at you straddling his brother's lap as Dean looks at your breasts. “Did we interrupt anything?”
“Nah, Dean just showed me his collection of pictures of his favorite girl.” Giggling you tug the phone back into Dean’s pocket.
“Did he show you the one of her in the car wash too? He ran after his car. It was sad to watch, to say the least.” Bursting into laughter you press your face into Dean’s chest.
“He thought…oh…that’s good…”
“Dude, don’t tell her.” Giving his brother a bitch face Dean points a finger at Sam. “I want her to believe I’m tough and you just ruined my chances…”
“Cas, anything new?” Changing the topic, you glance at your friend, but he shakes his head, shrugging.
“Cas and I found a whole lot of nothing. Jo didn’t meet strange people or bought anything suspicious, but we already knew that. So far I can only tell she refuses to help us. Her soul got tormented…”
“I don’t know if there’s a way to help her at all. Even if Jo was influenced by an object, cursed or anything her soul will never be the same and we won’t let Castiel take her pain away as he did with me.” Dean exclaims.
Castiel silently nods, knowing none of you would ever ask him to do so.
“Maybe I can help to find out what happened to that lovely blonde chick.” Crowley snickers popping up next to you and Dean, still kinda tangled in each other. “I see Dean takes every opportunity to make use of the contract.” A smirk on his lips the king of hell pats Dean’s shoulder. “Good job, Dean. Don’t let her slip through your fingers once again.”
“What do you mean by helping us to find out what happened to Jo?” Sam still doesn’t trust Crowley, so he cocks a brow, searching the demons face.
“I will make a deal with one of you and reveal…” Crowley will never end that line as Dean just threw his shoe at him.
“No one will make a deal with you. Especially not Y/N! Her ass is mine.” Panting heavily Dean glares at Crowley, ready to attack him.
“Good god, Squirrel. I didn’t mean you shall sell your soul. I only want to make a special deal about not killing me.” Shrugging the king of hell places a contract onto the library table, smirking as Castiel eyes it suspiciously.
“I do not trust your contracts.” Dean curses, watching his brother pick the contract up.
“So, one of us signs this and agrees to not kill you and then you’ll help us with our problem? That’s low, even for you.” Sam is crumbling the contract, tossing it into Crowley’s face.
“Fine…” Sighing Crowley glances at the contract one last time. “I only wanted to get paid for my hard work. I’ll do it for free then - again if I may add.” Snapping his fingers, the king of hell disappears, leaving you and your friends stunned behind.
“I do not trust that little bastard one bit,” Dean mutters as you slap his shoulder.
“Says the man playing best buddy with the king of hell not that long ago.” Pursing your lips you poke one finger into Dean’s cheek but he won’t budge, only look up at you.
“I was a demon…”
“I was a demon too and didn’t play footsie with the king of hell, Winchester. You like that little bastard and we all know it.” Smirking you fist Dean’s hair, forcing him to meet your eyes once again. “Admit it and you can take those pictures.”
“Son of a bitch, I’ll admit anything if you let me…” Groaning Dean watches Crowley reappear, a frown on his face.
“Sorry, but nothing supernatural was influencing Jo Harvelle as far as I was able to find out. Mother checked on her too and found nothing. I think it has something to do with her crazy mind or something. We see us soon. Boys. Lady.” Snapping his fingers Crowley disappears to leave all of you alone with your thoughts.
“I must admit…I’m disappointed.” Whispering the words, you look at Dean, knowing it hits him even harder. “I had hoped something, or someone was influencing Jo back then.” Wrapping your arms around Dean’s neck you let him hold you for a minute, knowing he needs to process his friend was the one abusing him.
“What now? Shall we…” Sam trails off, glancing at Castiel. “I mean, Jo is dangerous. She tried to attack Ellen and a nurse once again. Is there a way to make sure she can never harm anyone?”
----
Watching Jo in the padded cell you hold Dean’s hand in a tight grip. He can see Jo staring at him, a blank expression on her face. It seems like she’s in peace and you want to leave but then she jumps up to yell at you.
“This isn’t over! He’s still mine. One day I’ll get out of here, Y/N and no demon, angel or hunter will able to save you from me!” Jo curses as you slide your fingers through Dean’s hair before you kiss his lips softly.
“You know…” Panting against Dean’s lips you smirk. “I had the feeling someone unimportant just said stupid stuff. Let’s go back home and take these naughty pictures of your cute ass…” Dragging Dean away from the cell you smile to yourself as Jo keeps on screaming your name.
“I can take these pictures…” Dean husks.
“First I want to see your naked ass, Winchester. We can negotiate about you taking pictures of mine later…”
“I got a nice ass, trust me, Sweetheart…” Chuckling Dean stops in his tracks as you turn around to cradle his face.
“I trust you, Dean…”
“I trust you too, Baby Girl…”
“Trust me, no one wants to see the two of you flirting with each other…” Sam groans and Dean starts laughing, just like you.
Even Castiel can’t stop the smirk on his lips as Crowley snickers silently walking unseen toward Jo’s cell to make sure she can never hurt you again…
“I trust you too, Y/N so I will do what none of you was able to do…for you…”
Here lies the Masterlist for my Sherlock x Reader fic, Trust. By the way, strikethrough means the part is written, I just have yet to post it. I’ll try to keep this updated as I post. Much love xx.
Summary: You trust Dean with your life, he doesn’t even trust you with his car. All choices in life have consequences - Dean’s have much worse...
Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Crowley
Warnings: angst, unrequited love, arguments, mentions of torture (physically and mentally), demons
Set in Season 9 and 12. Jo and Ellen never died in Season 5. Bobby is still alive and kicking
Trust Masterlist
Two hours earlier…
You wake up and everything hurts…your body, your soul and your heart.
It can’t hurt, this is impossible. Barely able to open your eyes you groan when someone touches your shoulder.
Now your eyes snap open and you panic. You thought you escape the nightmare but here they are. All three demons are back, wearing your friend's faces and the fear is making your body go stiff.
Ignoring the pain in your body you try to get away, try to free yourself.
Screams echo through the room which looks much like the bunker you used to live in with the Winchesters, of course, it’s only another illusion.
“No! Please stop…I can’t bear the pain any longer.” You sob and beg. This time the three men look at you like they do not understand your fear. As if they didn’t torture you for months by now.
“Y/N? You are safe here. It’s me, Sam, Cas and Dean are here too.” One of the demons says and you start struggling against the handcuffs even more.
Sore wrists rub against cold metal and you bite back the pain only to get away, but you know you’ve got no chance.
“Please…I can’t tell you anything…just kill me.” You plea now and the demon wearing Dean’s face starts shaking. Another trick to make you crumble.
“Y/N…please calm down. We are here to help you. It’s me…Dean. Don’t you remember me?” He asks softly and you start trembling when he tries to touch you.
“Let me go! Please…I mean nothing to Dean Winchester, I swear. He hates me…he doesn’t like me…I swear…” You desperately beg.
“We need to get her out of the handcuffs,” Castiel says but you flinch away as soon as he gets closer.
----
Now…
“Shall we go in? I mean she let Crowley touch her.” Dean asks looking at his brother for confirmation.”
“No…Crowley said these demons used our faces to hurt her. We don’t know what else they did, Dean.” Sam says trying to swallow the lump in his throat.
“You think…god…” Dean says starting to shake.
“Oh, no…they didn’t touch her that way. It was more physical and mental torture, Squirrel. They pretend you came to save her and then you hurt her once again.” Crowley explains and Castiel swallows hard.
“Shall I delete her memories?”
“Won’t work trenchie. The memories are almost burned into her mind. I mean that’s the reason she wanted to stay a demon or get killed. You’ve got no clue how much she’s suffering right now. Curing her was selfish, Dean.” Crowley says with pity in his voice. “Death would’ve been a reliever.”
“Death! We can’t let her die!” Dean yells.
“Why not? Is not that she means anything to you. Hell, she was fighting so hard, so long but you didn’t even try to find and save her. Let her be. Maybe I can help her with a nice deal?” Crowley suggests and Dean wields his angel blade in front of the demon’s face.
“Fine…call me if you reached the end of the rope.”
----
Your body still aching, mind racing you look around the room. It looks like your old room, but you know the soft blankets and the warmth are all illusions to trick your mind.
“Y/N…this is real. We are not the demons. Please let me heal your body. It must be painful.” Castiel whispers and you look up at him with teary eyes.
“Just do it. I’ve got no strength left to fight the pain.” You whisper ready to let the demon cut you open once again. Prepared to feel pain you wonder when a warm feeling floats your body.
Castiel…it’s really Castiel. Realizing Sam must’ve cured you, that everything you remember is real you start crying.
You remember the torture, the pain…the moment you gave in. The moment you agreed to become a demon and you remember the pain and the hurting were gone after you said ‘yes’.
“I can try to remove the memories, Y/N,” Castiel whispers sitting down next to you.
“Won’t work. Crowley already tried to manipulate my mind. They did something, it’s like the memories are anchored to my mind.”
“I could ease the pain a bit.”
“No. I need…can you leave me alone for a while? I need to figure some things out.”
“I’m in my room. Sam and Dean are into town to get some groceries. They will make dinner for you later.”
“Thank you, Castiel.” You say looking at the angel.
Using all your strength to not start screaming when he gently touches your cheek. This is Cas, not the demon you tell yourself, but the fear won’t go away.
----
“Cas? Where is Y/N?” Sam asks.
“She was in her room when I left. Y/N let me heal her body and I told her you are out to buy groceries.”
“Shit…we need to find her. You investigate the bedrooms I’ll take the library. Dean…shooting range and lab!”
“Got it!” Dean yells already running toward the lab.
----
“She’s gone, Sammy…where would she go?” Dean sighs looking at his brother.
“Crowley offered her a deal to make the pain go away,” Castiel says and Sam panics.
“Dammit, we need to summon him.”
“I don’t think she will make a deal with Crowley, Sammy. I think she would…Fuck! Where is the next crossroad, Sam? Hurry…look for the next crossroad.” Dean stammers and Sam opens his laptop to find the next best crossroad.
“Not far away. Twenty minutes…look.” Showing Dean, the road Sam’s hands are shaking.
“I need to stop her.”
“Dean, let me do this.”
“No, Sammy this is all my fault. I need to save her. I can’t let her do this…I just can’t…”
----
The little box in your hand you add a picture of you. A picture you stole from Dean’s room. You got no clue why he has pictures of you in his room.
Your hands are shaking when you dig a little hole to add the box.
The moment you see the demon approach you gulp but this is the only way, the only way to not feel the pain, the hurting…the heartbreak.
“Y/N, Y/N already back to beg for more? What can I do for you?” The woman chuckles flashing her eyes red.
“I want to be a demon again, but I want full control as I don’t want to hurt someone.” You stammer as your body is trembling.
“Not hurting people – huh? That’s not how this works. Sorry, but I can’t guarantee you will not kill anyone. Do you still want the deal?”
“No! She doesn’t want a deal!” Dean barks firing a bullet out of the colt to kill the crossroad demon.
“Dean! Why did you do this?” You sob falling to your knees. “This was the only way…”
“Only way to become a black-eyed bastard again?”
“To forget…to not feel…to not remember…”
“I know they hurt you using our faces, but we will help you, Y/N. I swear Sammy, Castiel and I will help you.”
“Sure…like you helped me while they were torturing me. Six months, Dean. For six months I prayed you would come to rescue me…you didn’t…”
“I didn’t know they captured you, Y/N. We would’ve never let you down. I swear…”
“They called you, they used my phone, Dean. I heard someone answer the phone. You never came…”
“That’s impossible! No one called me, Y/N.”
“Liar…Look at my phone. I still got it. 8th of October 2013, Dean. They called you and you answered.”
“This is…” Staring at your phone Dean shakes his head. He doesn’t remember a call. “I swear I didn’t answer the call.”
“Doesn’t really matter anymore, ‘cause after that, they started the real fun. And boy did they have fun torturing me. They cut me open and then they used gentle words to soothe me. The next thing was they liked to use your face to tell me you do not trust me. That you hate me…that you only love Jo. I resisted for six months, three days and around five hours but then…”
“Y/N?” Dean whispers trying to touch you but you flinch away.
“They showed me something. A nice picture, a picture of you and Jo in the backseat. You were fucking her. The day they called you, the day they started hurting me for real you were busy fucking the slut responsible for my misery. You fucked her while these monsters cut me open. You let them hurt me willingly…” You gasp remembering the pain you felt, not just the physical pain.
“I got drunk and she fumbled my pants open…it just happened. I swear I did not answer the call. I would’ve never…please…”
“I got to go…” Getting up you want to leave but he grabs your arm. “Let go of me!”
“Please, …we can make it right. We are here…both. Let me make it right.”
“Make it right? I can’t pretend I’m alright, Dean and you can’t change me or my situation.”
“Please trust me, Y/N. I will find out who answered my phone, but it was for sure not me or Sam. I swear we would never do this to you. Trust me.”
“No Dean. Years ago, you didn’t trust me without a reason…this time I do not trust you…”
Set in Season 9 and 12. Jo and Ellen never died in Season 5. Bobby is still alive and kicking
Trust Masterlist
Three months have passed, three months in which Dean and Sam tried anything to find you but they didn’t even find a lead.
They will never find you. Hidden right under their noses you live in a cabin Bobby built for you years ago.
You can barely remember how it was to have feelings, but you still can distinguish wrong from right. The demons may have broken your body, but not your will.
From time to time you zap to Bobby’s to check on the old geezer. You can’t describe it but somehow you worry about the old man. He was a good friend, always will be but you can’t face him. He would make you crumble, would try to make you turn to Sam to let you cure you.
You can’t do this…you don’t want to feel the heartbreak ever again…
----
Watching the crowd in the bar a man catches your attention. He tries to hide it, but he’s got blood on his sleeves, this is not his blood.
Perks of being a demon, you can distinguish the blood of different persons. This is the blood of a young girl. If your eyes weren’t already black they would darken right now.
“Let’s see what you did, bastard.” You snicker following the slightly drunk guy outside. He is walking straight to a transporter and you can hear someone whimpering inside so you use your powers to smash the man into the car.
A shriek comes out of the car, so you handcuff the man before you rip the door open. Inside is a young girl. Curled into a ball she cries and her whole body is trembling. Your former self would’ve started to cry but now you just look at her and you feel something like anger boil up.
“No one will hurt you, hun. I will call someone, and he will help you, okay. The man will never hurt you again.” You whisper stripping your flannel off to cover the girl with it before leaving the transporter to think about your possibilities.
----
Not knowing what to do first your look down at the man. He peed his pants at the sight of your black eyes.
“Oh, I know what to do first…” Snapping your fingers you let him feel all the hurting, fear and pain of all his victims. Random faces flash up into his mind…victims…relatives of victims…pain.
“Please…” He gasps.
“Don’t worry, honey. This will not go away, never again. I could kill you, but where is the fun – right? You will feel the pain and the fear for the rest of your life. Enjoy your new life of horror.”
Stepping aside you call the only person coming to your mind. The one you wanted to avoid calling.
“Hey…Castiel…I need your help.” Is all you say before sending him your coordinates. He needs to help the girl. She would never survive the trip to a hospital.
----
Sitting in the transporter you try to keep the pain away till Castiel arrives. You are a demon but still, you try to help an innocent girl. One thing they couldn’t kill is your sense of justice.
“Shh…he will be here soon. The pain will go away, hun.”
----
“Y/N?” Castiel calls popping up next to the transporter, but he’s not alone.
“Cas, she’s inside, he hurt her pretty bad. You need to heal her, I can’t heal someone but I kept the pain away.” Nodding the angel enters the transporter to heal the broken body of the girl. “Maybe you should erase the memories too…Cas.” You whisper looking at the girl.
She doesn’t feel the pain anymore, but her body is shaking, and broken sobs leave her lips.
“Y/N…” Dean tries.
“Safe it, Dean. I got no time for your babbling. The girl is more important than my black eyes.”
“Please come with us.” Sam tries.
“Without my powers, I would’ve never found her. He would’ve killed her like the ten other girls. I know now where he is hiding their bodies. I can bring the families peace, Sammy. If anything good came out of my misery…so be it.”
“What did they do to you?” Castiel asks.
“My friend…you don’t want to know. Is she alright?”
“I healed everything. She will not remember what happened.”
“I’ll bring her home.” You say.
“No, you won’t, Y/N,” Dean mutters splashing holy water into your face.
“Ouch, asshole.” You chuckle and Dean’s eyes widen when you don’t even flinch.
“Why is this not hurting you?”
“I told you I don’t feel pain, includes physical pain. These demons were not clever.”
“You feel nothing? Not even pain from holy water or salt?” Sam asks.
“Nope. I mean I think it burns as you can see my skin is reacting, but I can’t feel the actual pain anymore. Perks of being a demon, Sammy. Now let me bring the girl home.”
“Y/N, please let me…just come with us.”
“Dean, Dean. What is it? Do you want to have a ride with a demon? Is your blonde chick boring by now?”
“It’s not like that.”
“Right, I forgot I was never your type. Not pretty, stupid or dolled up enough to show interest in my ass. You know what? I don’t care anymore, Deano. Years ago, I would’ve cried my eyes out but now I feel nothing, and I like it. My morals are still high, not like with Sammy during his soulless time. I still got my soul, it’s just hidden underneath all the darkness you caused, Winchester. Now let me do the family business and save the girl.”
Entering the transporter, you pick the girl up to zap her into her bedroom. Her parents are talking to cop’s downstairs, so you carefully lie her down. She doesn’t know about what happened and it’s for the best. You wish you had the luxury too…
Hearing someone walking upstairs and then stopping right in front of the room you give the girl one last glance. “You better watch your ass now.” You whisper before zapping back to your car.
“Y/N! Come with us.” Dean insists and you flip him the bird.
“Nope. I got better things to do, Sweetheart than letting you annoy me. I’ll call Cas if I find another victim. See ya…or not.” You chuckle running toward your car.
“We need to stop her, Sammy.”
“Dean, we can’t force her. Obviously, she’s no harm to anyone.”
“That’s not sure. The longer she stays like this, the more the darkness will affect her soul. It will taint her soul and twist it into something sinister.” Castiel says worriedly watching you enter your car.
“You are telling us this now?” Dean groans.
“Dean, I told you to get hold of her before I zapped you here. You failed, not me.” Cas mutters.
“Uh, guys? Can you not scream about demons and stuff that loud?” You ask.
“Y/N…please let me help you.”
“Sam…I can’t. If I would let you cure me, I would never be able to bear the memories, the pain. I just can’t, Sammy. I’m sorry. If I turn evil, just kill me.” You whisper giving him a cracked smile.
----
Some months later…
Watching Bobby you focus on the car he tries to repair. The engine radiator is damaged, so you whisper the words over and over again till Bobby finally gets the hint. You are ready to leave when you hear a voice.
“Kill him…” The voice whispers and you look around. There’s only you and Bobby. “Kill him…kill him…kill him!” The voice in your head screams and you press your hands to your ears and close your eyes.
The next moment you find yourself behind Bobby’s back, a knife in your hand to attack your friend. Realizing what just happened you start shaking.
Castiel was right…you are losing control.
-----
“Y/N, I’m glad you called me,” Sam says smiling but you don’t smile back. How could you?
“You need to do me a favor, Sammy. Castiel was right, I’m slowly losing control. Three days ago I was at Bobby’s like so often over the last three years…I watched him repairing a car and then…Sam…I heard a voice telling me to kill him. I couldn’t control it…I was behind him with a knife…” You whisper.
“Did you kill, Bobby?” Sam asks while his hands start trembling.
“No…I woke up right before I could hurt him but next time…you need to…”
“I’ll cure you.”
“No! No, no! I need you to kill me, Sam. I’m losing control and I don’t want to hurt Bobby or other people. I’m not the girl who left you, Sammy. I’m not even close but I still know what’s the right thing to do. There’s an angel blade or use Ruby’s knife. Do it, please.” You say looking up at your friend.
“I can’t do this…” Sam chokes out.
“You are my friend, the only one I can ask. I don’t want to be a prize for any hunter. Bobby wouldn’t do it, the old geezer like me too much and Dean…I would ask Cas but he would try to cure me. Sam…this is my decision…please end me right now. I’m begging you to end me.”
“I…”
Taking the demon knife out of his pocket Sam looks down at you. His hands are shaking but he will respect your wish.
To help him you cover the hand holding the knife with your own, leading it to your hear you nod at your friend.
Before he can stab you someone bursts the door open and the next thing you feel is someone pushing Sam away to handcuff you.
“Dean. I told you to stay away. Why are you here?” Sam yells.
“You wanted to kill her? Sam, we can cure her.” Dean yells back.
“I don’t want to be cured…I don’t want to feel the pain…don’t want to remember. Please…kill me, Castiel…Sammy…please…” You plea but Dean shakes his head.
“I will not carry the burden you died because of me. We will cure you - right now!”
----
Screams echo through the bunker and the pit in his stomach grows. Looking at you sitting on a chair Dean needs to hold back the tears.
The last syringe made your black eyes disappear but now you can’t stop shaking and you will not let anyone touch you.
“We need to free her but she won’t let me get close. She won’t let me read her mind either.” Castiel stammers making one step closer to you but the screams start a new.
“I’ll call Crowley. Maybe he knows what we can do.” Dean says and Sam cocks a brow.
“Crowley?”
“He’s a demon. I felt guilty after I became human again but she, she didn’t do anything wrong. It’s rather what these demons did to her. We need to help her, Sam.”
“Okay.”
----
“Hello, Darling,” Crowley says carefully walking toward the chair.
Not reacting to him you let him open the handcuffs. One snap of his fingers and you lie on a bed in the bunker. His hand touches your forehead and he can see everything the demons did to you. “I’m sorry, my dear. I’ll try to help you if I can. You can come to me for a new deal if you can’t bear the hurting.” He whispers.
----
“Why did she let you touch her and not us?” Dean mutters.
“I could see everything they did to hear, Squirrel. Not very pleasant memories. They cut her open every single day so there was barely a part of her body not bleeding. The worst was they used your faces. Even our beloved trench coat wearing angels face. They hurt her over and over again until she agreed to become a demon.” Crowley explains and Dean’s head starts spinning.
“I could see someone showed her a picture and that was the moment she gave up. I couldn’t see who was on the picture, but this was the moment she broke, Dean. She’s hiding the memory so well even I wasn’t able to see it.”
“Thanks…Crowley.” Sam says. “That’s the reason she wanted to die, Dean. Look at her! That’s what she became and I’m not sure we will be able to help her…”
Summary: You trust Dean with your life, he doesn’t even trust you with his car. All choices in life have consequences - Dean’s have much worse...
Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Crowley, Jo Harvelle, Ellen Harvelle, mentioned: Bobby Singer, Ash
Warnings: angst, mentions of torture (physically and mentally), violence, mentions of drugging someone, mentions of rape (nothing graphic), a hint of fluff
Set in Season 9 and 12. Jo and Ellen never died in Season 5. Bobby is still alive and kicking
Trust Masterlist
“Y/N, calm down. We don’t know she is behind all this for sure.” Dean tries but you keep on cackling.
“Seriously, Dean? She distracted you from picking me up that day. Then I get kidnapped and she calls my phone and answers the call of the demons. You fucked her after she drugged you and Sammy. Ash saw her with your phone, but you keep on protecting that whore? I bet she made a deal with these monsters or rather she is a monster.”
“Please, let us talk to her first, Y/N. Castiel and Crowley are on their way back to tell us about your deal and the demon holding your contract. Let’s calm down and plan our next steps wisely…please. I know you do not trust Dean, but please trust me.” Sam tries and for a moment you just stand there, looking at your friend.
“I’m sorry, Sammy. I know you want to do the right thing, save everyone but…you can’t save me Sam and you know it. Look at me. I’m broken. Only my demonic half keeps me upright. The pain, the memories are back, and I can’t…I just can’t. Every time I close my eyes I see my friends hurting, violating me in the cruelest way possible. I’m scared to the bone only looking at you…Dean is even worse…I will kill her and then…you can end me.” You say before you run toward the garage.
“We need to stop her,” Dean yells running after you but the moment he reaches his car he sees you smiling at him. A smile he has not seen for years.
“Goodbye, Dean. I hope you and Sam have a long and fulfilled life. I forgive you as this is the end once for all.” You whisper before vanishing.
“Son of a bitch, Sammy!”
----
“Jo…Jo…Jo…it’s been a while. How have you been?” You chuckle as the blonde woman is staring at you with wide eyes. Sliding your knife over the bar counter you smirk at her. “Did the cat got your tongue? I asked you a question.”
“Fine…I’m fine, Y/N…and you?” Jo asks nervously biting her lip.
“I was not ‘fine’. Getting kidnapped, tortured and mentally raped by demons is no fun I can tell. The best thing was…they used my friend's faces.”
“I’m sorry…” Jo lies, and you chuckle. “Why are you here?”
“Hmm…why…am…I…here?” You cackle wielding the knife in front of Jo’s face. “I’m here as Ash over there. Ash are you with us?” You ask looking at the unconscious and to a chair bond man. “Damn he’s such a party crasher…”
“Please…don’t hurt me.” Jo gasps.
“Oh…you know what? I begged these demons too. Every…single…day. They never stopped hurting me for months, Jojo…for months. I always asked myself why they did not let me go or just killed me after they got to know Dean won’t come to save me.”
“Dean …”
“Yeah…Good, old Dean Winchester. Hero. Asshole. Son of a bitch but still sexy as hell, Dean Winchester. Do you know why they did not let me go, Jojo?” You ask now sliding the dull side off your knife over Ellen’s arm.
“I don’t know, Y/N.” Jo stammers.
“Odd. You made a deal with these guys and do not know? Don’t play stupid blonde chick with me, Jo. We both know better. Ash over there heard you called the demons and he saw you answering the phone. After that, you fucked Dean while he was drugged. Poor little Jo. Didn’t he got hard without drugging him?” You tease.
Knife only inches from Ellen’s face you smirk at the older woman. Her eyes are wide, and she stares at her beloved daughter in disbelief.
“Jo…is what she says true?” Ellen gasps.
“Fine, you’ve got me, bitch! Even after I managed to drive a wedge between you and Dean he never stopped talking about you. He was yearning for you, your friendship and more. I hated it…I had to get rid of you but also I wanted to have some fun…” Jo chuckles and you smile at her.
“Fun…interesting. So you made a deal with a bunch of demons and drugged Dean to rape him?”
“I did not rape him! I just gave him something to get more…”
“Get hard and horny? To make him want you? Pitiful little Jo. Not able to get a man hard the natural way so you make deals and rape him?”
“I did not!”
“Shut up, blonde bitch. Here’s the deal. Dean and Sammy are on their way, but I have plenty of time. I want the name of the demon you made your deal with and I want to know why they wanted to break me.”
“I suggested hurting you to break you. I wanted you to become a demon, so Dean got no other choice than killing you. I did not expect him to become one himself and before I knew years passed…” Jo says, and you start cackling.
“You thought Dean would kill me? God, you are too stupid. Even now he tries to save me, tries to make it up to me. Dean is ripping himself into pieces before he kills me, stupid child. The guilt is eating him alive and this is your fault. Did you believe he would marry you, give you hot sweaty sex every night? We are talking about Dean Winchester.”
“I thought…”
“No, you didn’t think, bitch. I was in your way and you wanted me to suffer. Now I will make you suffer.” Your hand wraps around Ellen’s throat and you can see no emotion in Jo’s eyes. “Ellen…does your daughter love you?” You whisper and Ellen looks at you. Tears are streaming down her face, but she nods. “When was the last time she was warm and friendly?”
“Before that night…before she and Dean…” Ellen whispers as you lean closer to her.
“We’ve got a problem, Ellen. I think Jo made a hell of a deal and she’s like Sam back then, soulless…only worse. I will open your bindings now and you will take the knife, help Ash and get out of here.” You whisper and Ellen’s eyes widen. “Now…”
----
“Ellen, where is Y/N?” Sam pants running after Dean who is storming into Ellen’s bar.
“She said Jo is soulless like you years ago. Y/N believes Jo made a deal or something, drugged Dean to…”
“I got it. Stay outside with Ash. Castiel will help you. Crowley, come with me.” Sam orders and the King of hell rolls his eyes.
“Find out who has her contract. Help us getting faster to Ellen’s Bar…come with me. We need to talk about your abilities in making conversation, Moose.” Crowley snickers and Sam glares at the much smaller man.
“We’ve got no time for this shit. If Y/N kills Jo, there’s no turning back…”
“Blah…blah…let her kill the crazy chick. She deserves catching hell for sure…”
----
“Y/N, Y/N…do you believe you can kill me? If you do so…Dean will end you once for all.” Jo snickers. Her whole posture changed, and she smirks at you.
“That’s the goal, bitch. I’ll kill you and Dean will end me.” You chuckle and her smile fades.
“You don’t have to kill me. Be smart and let me help you. It feels so good being free of your soul. I know you remember the feeling, don’t you?”
Jo says slowly walking toward you. Her hips sway and she smiles at you but the smile doesn’t reach her eyes.
“I was never soulless, only a sexy demon. I was still in control…just without all the painful memories.” You whisper.
“Perfect! Wasn’t it, prefect? The stillness of heart, mind, and soul. Only pure unadulterated power. Doing what you want to do. No more, sad little girl! No more he only sees me as a sister! No more he only loves Y/N! Free, powerful…and thoughtfully fucked in his backseat.” Jo snickers and you slam your fist into her face.
The next punch hits her stomach, followed by a kick to her shin. Huntress or not, soulless or not she can’t stand against a trained huntress with demonic powers. Your eyes flash black and you punch her face again, and again. Memories come back, memories of the pain and desperation so you get your gun out of your waistband and motion her to get up.
“Any last wishes?” You ask.
“Dean…” Jo chuckles.
“I don’t think he wants you if he gets to know you drugged and raped him…”
“I did not! I just made him more complying…” Jo gasp as you unlock your gun and press your finger to the trigger.
“Y/N, don’t do this,” Dean calls for you. Distracted you look at him. His eyes widen and you watch him aiming his gun, you barely register the gunshot before the bullet hits Jo’s body.
Looking at her falling to the ground you see the weapon in her hand. She would’ve killed you…
“It was her…it was all her to get you…” You whisper before darkness consumes you.
----
“What does that mean for her, Castiel?” Sam asks.
“We got her contract and the demon is dead. Crowley released her and she should be back to normal soon. At least her demonic half should fade away…the rest…” Castiel sighs looking at your unconscious form in the backseat of the Impala. “Only time can tell. She will need help. Without her powers and demonic half of her suppressing the memories and the pain…”
“I got it, Castiel. Y/N will need her friends.”
“How’s Ellen?” Dean asks.
“She can’t believe her daughter did all these awful things. Drugging you and letting Y/N getting kidnapped…she did this before she sold her soul, Dean. It was all Jo, not her soulless self.” Sam explains.
“I never thought…”
“According to Ellen, her daughter was jealous. She heard you talking about Y/N and how much you miss her. That you want to try to find and make it up to her. This was the moment Jo decided Y/N has to go…”
“Dammit!” Dean curses. “Will Jo survive?”
“Likely…I don’t know what to do with her if she survives. Her soul was in hell for a long time and I got no clue if getting it back would make things worse or not. It was her hurting Y/N and…abusing you…”
“Don’t remind me, Sammy. I felt guilty for all this time. I always saw Jo as a younger sister, nothing more. I never thought she’s into me, Sam. How could I not see she’s crazy?”
“Let’s drive back home. Good thing Bobby got here in time with your car or Crowley would mutter even more.”
“We owe him one.” Dean sighs glancing at the demon looking at you in the backseat. He’s tapping your forehead and a smile crosses his face.
“Hands off, Crowley!” Dean barks and the demon shrugs.
“Just gave her a pleasant dream. I’m suppressing the bad memories at least in her dreams so she can sleep peacefully. I like her. Hell of a woman, Winchester. You better watch over her or I’ll do so.” Vanishing Crowley leaves a stunned Dean behind.
“Every man seems to fall for Y/N.” Sam chuckles and his brother glares at him.
----
“How do you feel?” Dean asks sitting next to you on his bed.
“Like a freight train rammed me and a car hit me next. My head hurts and I hate seeing your face, otherwise, everything is fine.” You mutter. “Is she dead?”
“In a hospital. Ellen is with her, along with Cas and Crowley. It was her…I’m so sorry you became a victim as she wanted me.” Dean whispers taking your hand in his.
“At least you had some fun…I got the shitty part of the deal, I guess.” You tease.
“She drugged me and Sammy. I would’ve never…I swear. I felt guilty after I had sex with Jo. She was like a sister to me and I thought I ‘used’ her that night.”
“It was the other way around. Damn, Dean. Did no one taught you to not accept drinks from strangers?” You cough as you try to sit up.
“Lie down, Y/N. You need to rest. I remember how I felt after I turned back into human. I made you a bowl of soup and a hot chocolate if you want to eat and drink something.”
“I should hit the road soon. I’ve got unfinished business …”
“I know, Y/N. We still need to find the demon offering Jo her deal and giving her the drugs. We will find him and rip him apart. For now,…rest.”
“Yes, mommy!” You grunt.
“Sleep, Y/N. Please for once in your life, listen to me. Trust me…”
“Dean…”
“Please…trust me…”
“I can try…”
