Ships? But Sir, They're Trains!
It's Valentine's Day, and to celebrate, I thought I'd break my usual streak of not shipping the talking trains together and share the pairings that I like the best! But only of the original 11, and a few other RWS-related friends (and maybe a bonus or two from the TVS).
Also known as: local weirdo decides trains can kiss, but only on Valentine's Day.
Let's get into the ships... er... trains.
Almost chronically single. I'm sorry Thomas, but you're not very good at the dating thing. Maybe Hank if I swallowed my pride and went to watch Season 12 - just because Hank's calm and friendly personality would naturally balance out Thomas. But also because they are the epitome of 'gentle giant' and 'tank engine terror'. Also, Thomas blushes in this episode:
(Sorry for the Season 12 image, but it's the only Season Hank was in!)
This engine has options! Or more to the point - this engine has suitors. Not all make sense to the poor engine - but that's the pain of being the one everyone looks up to. I would put him with BoCo, but I must admit I had a phase where I read EdwardxJames fanfics. So... nostalgia wins (that and Edward needs someone with a fiery personality to boost his confidence sometimes, and James needs a cooler head all the time).
(Look at the smile on James' face! He's ecstatic to see his engine.)
Bear. The answer is Bear. I'm sorry, but that Hymek has it bad for Henry, and Henry fought for Bear to stay on Sodor. And after the early days when every engine fought, Henry has no interest in getting tangled up with them again, only this time romantically. Besides, the youthful energy and eagerness Bear has will only benefit Henry, who can be a bit of an old grump.
(Bear, I can't tell if you're looking into Henry's eyes or not...)
Hoo boy... Gordon, oh Gordon. What to do with you? Henry and James are taken, Edward and Thomas are more siblings than romantic interests - and engines 6 through 11 are just not close enough. But how about BoCo? (Yes, this is why I didn't pair him up with Edward). BoCo is calm and polite where Gordon is loud and brash - and Gordon does see BoCo as his saviour. It would probably be the plot of a b-list romantic movie, but I can see these two getting together, with Gordon being the jock and BoCo being the 'kid' of Edward.
(Look at that little smile Gordon has! This engine is smitten.)
He's with Edward, thank you. More than that, he doesn't really fit well with the other RWS cast romance-wise. Thomas is something of a rival and friend, while he wants Gordon and Henry to acknowledge him and Percy is something of a little brother/annoyance to James. Edward and he have a lot to work out (mostly James groveling) but they got a lot of coding in the series from what I remember. Plus Edward saved him - so we've ticked the cliche box.
(Yes, this means Edward is the knight in shining armour. James is a diva anyway.)
Has about as much luck as Thomas does, if we're honest. Young, childish Percy has no chance, while older, grumpier Percy is more interesting to consider. The Percy of Seasons 5 and 6 I could see bagging Harold. But then, we could also consider the absolute insanity of Percy and Diesel 10. Imagine the shock, imagine the story! (I'm a writer, let me dream about how I'd write this lot). Diesel 10 would be the delinquent who is soft for Percy and Percy only. It would also lead to an epic fight between the helicopter and the engine with a giant claw.
(Um, is Percy... blushing?! What are these faces?! I have questions.)
Is married to Henrietta. They are old couple goals. Percy and Thomas are extremely jealous.
(Toby is grinning cause he knows his wife - that poor manager...)
I considered Percy for Duck, but I feel like what Duck needs is an engine who can really bring out the playful side in Duck - the engine who helps him be more than just the railway he used to work for. That engine is Donald. When they ended up playing pranks on each other in Donald's Duck to the point where Duck stooped to putting a literal duck in Donald's tender knowing Donald would find it funny really says it all about these two.
(Look at him, so excited to play his little prank! His driver is wheezing!)
These two practically have a kid in Toad already (or an advice-giving uncle. One of the two). Douglas saved Oliver, and that sort of thing has a lasting impact - especially because it's also the most likely relationship to actually happen. Both Douglas and Oliver are known for sticking it to authority, being a bit hot-headed and being led a bit more by spirit and the heart than by their heads. They have Toad for critical thinking. They live and work together too - and it would be hilarious to watch Duck blast his safety valve off when he finds out.
(Ah yes, let me just stare into your eyes for half an episode.)
These two are disaster lesbians, and we love them for it. It's also the femme fatale (or as femme fatale as a diesel railcar can be) and the butch (she works in a quarry - this girl wears overalls) tropes - and they're disasters. Need I remind anyone that Daisy was the one who encouraged Mavis to ignore Toby? It would also be hilarious purely for how much Thomas and Percy would grumble about being single, while Daisy and Mavis rub their relationship in the pair's faces. Which would lead to that one memorable incident where Thomas tried to flirt with a very unamused and confused Bertie.
(Mavis, sweetie - don't listen to Daisy's advice. I know you're distracted but ple-- and she's gone.)
Are wine aunts and siblings. And no, neither of them are interested in Thomas, so you can stop thinking that.
(These coaches are Thomas' wine aunts and best friends - and he loves them too.)
Are children! Edward's children! That he has with BoCo (sort of) leading to the brilliant moments where Gordon has to 'babysit' them - which is mostly done with a lot of grimacing and begging BoCo to just hand this lot over to Edward and James - no seriously, please stop letting these two just randomly adopt you as their parent. They're evil, and they wanted to throw me in the sea, remember? No, I don't care that James doesn't like them, I don't like them! BoCo!
(He's petrified of them, but he wants to be nice for BoCo's sake...)
Does not need a man, thank you. But she is entranced sometimes by Caitlin's streamlining (yes, I have seen some CGI - I am not a true purist, I am sorry Awdry). Then again, sometimes Emily likes Hiro - and then there was that one time where she was just so upset that Mavis wouldn't notice her. Emily doesn't need no man - but she's also not exactly got the best selection of potential candidates at her shed...
(She's got an amazing poker face. Caitlin however...)
So... that was a thing I did. Somewhere around Percy's entry, this gained a coherent plot in my mind - probably a High School AU? - and now I'm just thinking of Diesel 10 towering over Percy, blushing and trying to give him flowers (with his claw???) while Harold seethes. Clearly, being a single pringle has driven me insane.
Happy Valentine's Day to everyone, I hope you enjoyed this wild idea and if people want expansions on these ships (still trains) and why I like the idea of them, please go ahead and ask!
If people really like this, I will take on the Narrow Gauge engines.
