Reflection Agosto 6
12 days back in the States! It feels good to be back in the Mitten. This is home, after all. However, just because I am back stateside doesn’t mean that the program is over; and it sure as hell doesn’t mean that my connection with my students is over. That bond is going to last forever.
We’re currently in Phase III of the USBC/Conexão Mundo program and are mainly focused on our reflections of our time in Brasil. We (students & coaches) reflect on what we learned about ourselves, how we have changed, and how our perspective has shifted looking forward. The experience doesn’t end upon the return home. Here is my reflection:
One of the greatest gifts of living abroad, living out of your comfort zone, is the time time and space it gives you to learn about yourself. In a new land, you’re challenged to deal with a new language, different food, a foreign culture. You react. You let yourself be vulnerable. You learn that you love the Portuguese language, you realize your potential as a teacher, and you find out that the beach is where you ultimately want to be. Of course, I’m obviously speaking of myself here. Although, I doubt anyone would disagree about my previous beach statement.
The 31 days in Brasil have undoubtedly changed me. I have evolved in my capacity for PATIENCE, beginning from the dreaded Visa fiasco to group conflicts in Brasil (which are inevitable) to the infamous job search back here in the U.S. Maybe it’s the way even the most commercial establishments round up/round down their change assuming that it will all even out when it’s time to crunch numbers. Perhaps it’s the 20,30, 60 minute “goodbyes” that switch our focus from constantly needing to make the next appointment to actually cherishing that time we have with the people we care about. Hell, it could be the green mountains reminding you that every time something goes wrong that... “it can’t be all THAT bad if you have this mountain view”. Whatever the reason, I’ve left Brasil with a rejuvenating patience that keeps me calm during the chaos that surrounds me. Because I know no matter what the tab adds up to, no matter when my next appointment is, I’ll have my people with me and I’ll have my mountain view. Now, I took a LOT of pictures down there so I have plenty of mountain views on my desktop.
That patience has put me at peace when thinking about the future ahead. My good friends Kyle & Lea wrote a quote from Judith Thurman in the front of the notebook they gave me (yes, the same notebook I used to maintain this blog) that reads:
“Every dreamer knows that it is entirely possible to be homesick for a place you’ve never been to, perhaps more homesick than for familiar ground.”
I read that quote before I left for Brasil and I’m reading it again now; and I can’t tell you how much more I relate to it upon my return. I love home. I love Michigan. I grew up here, my parents are here, my friends are here. Everything I’ve known has been here...We have some of the best beer this country has to offer (close rival, Colorado).
But I also know that there is so much more out there. And as much as I feel at home here, where my roots began, I know I also have a home out there. I feel it. I have that itch in the back of my neck again. I’m longing for it.
No, I’m not hopping on a plane tomorrow to Singapore or somewhere for some kind of vision quest (not yet at least). I’ll be here for a minute. I have people I need to create some memories with. But I’ll be on the road again...and I’m sure you already know that.
-Nate
