#useless nanny

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Useless Nanny: Here, I can keep cuddling the cat for you while you’re busy

Priya: NO PUT HIM DOWN YOU’LL PROBABLY BREAK HIM LIKE YOU DO EVERYTHING ELSE!

Issa gal! Welcome to the Uberhood, sweet little Avani Ramaswami.

Useless Nanny: Hello young bubber, let’s roll you onto the cold hardwood floor.

Priya: Seriously Moonshine, why is she still here.

BUT WAIT! Then, Useless Nanny actually did something useFUL and put Avani IN THE CRIB! Well I never. Maybe Useless Nanny is actually turning over a new leaf.

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Cheech: Ah, finally. A moment alone to watch my stories –

Cheech: WHY ARE YOU IN HERE?!

Cheech: AND YOU, whose growing in of facial features we anticipate with a mixture of dread and excitement?! This is it, this is my life now isn’t it.

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1) Aww

2) Holy crap that went fast

3) Well, one way to get revenge on a Useless Nanny is to make her feel endlessly uncomfortable I suppose.

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Nope, I was wrong. Useless Nanny hasn’t turned over a new leaf, she’s being her usual charming self when meeting people. Ramir Patel takes it all in his stride though, he has to, being a politician.

Also, hello Ramir Patel! I don’t know when or how he got here or what he’s doing here but here he is.

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Wow, I think the Ramaswamis win the award of Unfortunate Enough To Employ The Worst Ever Nanny And That’s Saying Something Given The Standard This Game Sets. Yes, that is indeed the official title.

This one introduced herself to Sanjay by poking him in the face, smashed their bathroom door whilst running herself a bath, and then proceeded to have a bath approximately 53 TIMES THAT DAY. I genuinely wish I was exaggerating.

Dinesh survived somehow btw.

In more positive news, I had Sanjay grow his hair out and look how adorbs he looks! Okay adorbs isn’t really the Rock God vibe he was going for but at least he can fully headbang while he’s keyboarding now.

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Great day for Sanjay – not merely a promotion but REVENGE ON HIS NEMESIS NANNY! Seriously I’m not sure how long she can carry on looking after Dinesh given how close these two are to having a full on scrap.

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Ain’t no party like a useless nanny party ’cos a useless nanny party DON’T START.

Robert: Hello? Yes thank you Ms Repairman, there appears to be a cloud of ashen smoke spewing from the computer, I believe the nanny broke it. ...What? It’s a common problem you say? Well what the bloody hell do we pay these nannies for –

Robert: Ms Repairman, she has the cat now, you don’t think she’s going to break that too do you?

Cheech: RELEASE ME YOU AWFUL EXCUSE FOR A GUARDIAN

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Y’know, I’d focus in on the adorable gathering of septuagenarians on the sidewalk (if that’s even remotely accurate, I’m vastly generalizing since Dora was at death’s door pre green juice, Denise is 11 days away from a’reapin’, Luis is a veritable spring chicken with a whole 22 days to go, Useless Nanny is probably being pushed into a ladderless pool tomorrow if she continues her reign of futility). 

However, Yael ‘Hellmonster’ Gavigan has showed up. I don’t know which idiot brought her home from school but now, we can focus on nothing but survival, dear friends.