SMOKING is familiar, a throw back to a time before the serum, before the winter soldier project, & the war. it’s a security blanket, a crutch. something to keep his already frayed nerves from fallin’ apart when he’s losing sleep, when the nightmares are getting to be too much & old memories are surfacing from the recesses of a forgotten void. ❝i was thinkin’ — ❞ flicking the half-burnt up cigarette, he stubs it out on the sidewalk, gaze never leaving the empty street – the silence, was an odd comfort; something to QUIET the chaotic noise in his brain. ❝ ‘bout doin’ somethin’ special for Nat. ❞
ROMANCE isn’t his strong point. used to be, there wouldn’t be a girl in New York who could withstand the Barnes Charm, but the ashes of the man he once was, had long since been scattered by the brutality of war & the fragmented recollections of his past were all he’d had left. ❝ MAYBE take her somewhere nice, or, i d'unno, buy her that pistol she’s been eyeing. nothin’ says I love you like flowers, and a gun, right? ❞ his lip twists up into a crooked smile, eyes finally flicking over to john. it’s been a few months since they’ve reconciled, as a couple, though their history goes back to the COLD WAR, a convoluted path of complications, hiding, & blood trails. but she’s saved him, been a constant for years, helped him through the nightmares – the depression. if it hadn’t been for her, he might not BE here.
❝ she deserves it. ❞











