#vampy stuff

[partially-void-and-stars]

If hear one more person say that Twilight ruined vampires because they’re supposed to be scary and not sexy I’m gonna snap

[renfields--moved]

ren/odette: 17-22 33, 35

ugh I miss those maladjusted kiddos

17. What was their last phone call (text/letter/insert applicable) about?Ren would send letters with no return address about how he hopes she’s doing well, how it’s really peaceful where he is, she’d like it probably, there’s a stray cat that comes by every so often, it’s nice

(the last actual conversation they had probably involved a lot of him internally panicking and finally opting not to turn her or ask her come with him when she talks about something with Richard)

18. What was the last lie each of them told the other?"You’re not frightened of me, are you? I promise you’ve got no reason to be." "Course not, honey. Never." 

19. When was the last time either slept alone? Since Ren sleeps in a box, he kinda sleeps alone all the time?(not including the first week or so after AR was turned…)  for Odette, probably somewhere between Charlie being boss and Renfield leaving and before marrying Richard, idk 20. Where did they last have dinner together (and what did they eat)?Some corner place off Broome St that Charlie took O once for pasta. She gets carbonara. Ren watches her eat and gets irritated when the waiter keeps shoving wine at him. 

21. Will this be the last relationship each of them has? I dunno if it could even be called a relationship in any traditional sense, but no. 22. What will their last words to each other be? "I can come back sometime, you know. Arnold-" "It’s a little late to ask him for anythin’, don’tcha think?" 

33. How well would the couple do as a team in a bar fight? Most likely Ren would pull some posh chivalrous “why are you speaking to a lady like that” bullshit but if things came to violence he’d probably literally pick Odette up and leave, what are they even doing in a bar, why is she drunkenly picking fights with people, oh my god (if he had anything to do with physical violence it would probably end horribly ugly and jeopardize his passing as a human publicly so that would be… bad)

35. If one was abducted, how would the other respond, and how capable of organizing a rescue would they be?  

If Odette got kidnapped, Renfield would probably go to AR and be like HELP, FIX THIS, YOU KNOW TERRIBLE PEOPLE, CALL THEM 

because that would seem like the most straightforward way of dealing with things and AR likes to help him like the sad puppy surrogate sibling he is

(alternately, Ren would get Richard, but I think he’d be worried about either of them hurting more people than was necessary or good for themselves) 

and the other way around I don’t think O would even know anything happened, because it would be like.. Quincey.. or someone she’s totally aware of who was responsible

and the Count would just be like the fuck is this and fix it immediately himself 

[renfields--moved]

samrily replied to your video:not sure if the trailer I posted earlier was...

i mean, it’s an interesting take i guesS? and charles dance as a nosferatu monster HECK YES PLEASE! but i wish that a true story of dracula could be told, like a true adaptation of the florescu and mcnally biography. that’s what i want.

I like monsters and I want to like all things Dracula-related even if they're goofy and awful... but I'm not and will never will be here for romanticized or even marginally heroic Vlad/Dracula things 

it's the most boring and unnecessary thing ever and we have too much of it already! How many times have we seen some tiny variation within this mythos on "I sold my soul and became a monster for my family/wife/country/etc"? it isn't anything new and I don't know why people think it's still a story worth telling

I'm so tired of these redemption arcs that try to paint sadistic, awful dudes as ~really good guys after all~

just let him be the bad guy with a violent path that led him there and don't try to make anyone believe differently, neither the character or the historical figure were good people at all. And that doesn't limit them from being interesting and deep - a villainous Dracula doesn't have to be a pulp villain in a cape. and maybe we can tell a story about survival and people that aren't boring milquetoast dude protagonists, to boot?? 

[renfields--moved]

better things to include in your Vlad the Impaler-inspired Dracula mythos than this "sad woobie baby handsome British actor tragic hero" garbage:

there's heavy evidence that Vlad was part Turkish (aka maybe don't pick a white guy to play him) 

there is a ~for some reason~ rarely discussed possibility that he was an abuse survivor from the period of time he and his brother were wards/hostages of the Ottoman Empire, aka maybe there was a lot of internalized hate and pain and convoluted violence there instead of just "lol he's a crazy dude who put people on pikes!" just saying 

he was BFFs with the Pope, and was a violent Christan fundamentalist in the 1400s. As in CRUSADES and DEATH happened. And nothing was romantic or tragically heroic at all. 

seriously you make a movie about Vlad the Impaler and your opening line in the trailer is "my father was a great man"

can we maybe not

[renfields--moved]

Why is Hellsing a bunch of silly nonsense and yet still the most successful thing out there when it comes to interpreting Dracula as something different, or even vaguely informed by actual history beyond "HE PUT PEOPLE ON SPIKES!!! SCARY!!!"

oh wait, it's probably because nobody wants to do their research, or talk about the possibility of Tepes being an abuse survivor

and maybe also not romantic or heroic at all (or alternately, not painting him strictly as a PURE EVIL CRAZY PERSON!!!!)

can we just take the entire Dracula mythos away from uncomfortable straight dude creators for a while and maybe stop conflating Gary Oldman romantic Dracula with.. everything 

uuuugh

[renfields--moved]

#ashley #your talent is going to kill me #this is the best #he is probably 10000% done #but also LOOK ARE MY PROGENY #OKAY...LOOK AT SERAS... #at least#*taps ren in the head* #and #he is going to watch them bond from across the room #while drinking tea with Integra and he is going to feel really proud #because after all this time and all his wrong doings #he is growing soft #and he has a fuckef up family that for some reason he doesnt understand likes him #they actually like him#and he is growing soft #*vomits* #alucard #hellsing #renfield #seras victoria#ashley thank you for this!!!!

AHH THANK YOU AND YOU'RE WELCOME

but man (putting some meta feelings under a cut ahhh)

I think that while both Alucard and Integra have gone soft over time (though perhaps Integra moreso if only because Alucard still is used as a weapon or expects to be one).. Alucard still meets Renfield again and expects him to be the same person he was a century before

meek and subservient and silent and cowering and.. basically a broken shell of a person

(and another thing for Alucard to despise himself for, to believe he needs to be kept and controlled by the Hellsings for, is that he did that to him) 

except he starts to notice the things about his older progeny that have healed with time and changed

and that even though he's quiet and still easily flustered he has so much power, even if he's not a fighter, purely because he survived this long (and he maybe wants to know who Renfield has in his head now, because whoever they are they're much quieter than Bernadotte... but he doesn't want to seem like he's concerned, he doesn't want to seem like he regrets leaving him behind) 

and Alucard starts to notice how Ren and Seras balance each other out, how they're similar and how they're not, and maybe he's made something good, even if he won't give himself much credit for it

wehhh I have too many feelings for stupid nazi-hunting vampire au sigh

[renfields--moved]

kingthorin replied to your post: kingthorin replied to you...

this is the best thing ever ohmygod. crying about this tbh.

just

they'd have the best adorable brother/sister dynamic

except Seras would want to baby Renfield even though he's really adamant that he's fine, really, he's much older than her, shouldn't he be coddling her, oh god stop hugging me 

(except don't because he's fucking starved for affection and Alucard's just like "ugh you're still really annoying, you're both really annoying, why did I turn either of you...") 

ps Alex and I decided that Renfield would fit into the Hellsing household fairly perfectly since the butler position is entirely available after the whole Walter fiasco, and for 30 years Integra had to deal with Seras being really shit at trying to cook

[renfields--moved]

Alucard this is why you don't make vampire babies ok this is why