#vent sesh

[fatbratbabe]

Little rant about body image and feeling insecure

So this Friday, I’ll be modeling for a blacklight body paint show. I’ll be mostly nude (just a thong and pasties) and I was feeling really good about everything. But now as the event is getting closer and I’m one of two plus size models, I’m starting to feel extremely body conscious.

I normally love my body and my curves. I don’t usually look at my body with disgust but as this event gets closer, it’s been harder to see my body as beautiful. It’s been a long time since I’ve had these kind of negative thoughts about my body.

Im not saying this to fish for compliments because between here and bartending, I get plenty of compliments on my body. I think I just need to vent about it, get the thoughts out of my head so that I can just purge it and focus on the things I do love about my body & focus on that.

Okay, rant over 🙃

[myheadisonfire]

would going to new york for my birthday alone be a mistake? i’ve been feeling like getting away. i mean of course going somewhere secluded would make more sense to go clear my mind but i just think that’d make me feel even more lonely. i’ve started planning it and i’m nervous to bring it up to my boyfriend or friends bc i don’t want any of them to think i’m leaving them out. i just think it’d be so amazing to do something on my own. like really on my own. i’ve always wanted to travel solo for forever but to new york? that might be a bit scary...which is always intriguing. ill continue to toss the idea around in my head and then maybe we can see if it’s even financially viable. I also can’t help but think if i don’t go now i’ll regret it and if there’s on thing i don’t like is regret. crossroads.

[wickedlittleoz]

okay, i just have to vent.

i work in the uni campus. it's VERY big and very green and people have a terrible habit around these parts of abandoning animals in large green areas, like parks and obv the campus. so a couple years back some students and professors of vet med founded an organization to care for these animals, because they wound up sick and starving and breeding. great. beautiful. we (my family) help them whenever we can, with food and medicine donations, because they can't cover everything alone.

so this fine afternoon, about an hour ago, i was on my way to clock out (the clock is in a separate building from the one i work in) and i hear desperate meows, literal cries for help. me and another lady who was going by, we both stop and start looking, and we find a cat stuck on top of a building. it's not a very tall building, but there are no windows, it's built like a garage, and she's small, like she probably isn't more than a year old and has a small build anyways.

me and the lady get crazy worried. i forget i have to clock out at all. we start going around asking for help and no one seems to know what to do. we wind up at the med vet department and they tell us they can't rescue the cat. they can't. help us. rescue the cat.

which explains A LOT of the troubles the organization that actually cares for the animals here go through, tbqh.

so i'm typing this while sitting on the fucking ground waiting for firefighters because in a large ass fucking campus no one NO ONE could volunteer to find a fucking ladder that went high enough to rescue a small cat.

i'm just PISSED and really sorry for venting on your dashboards like this but this is so upsetting i could throw punches.

[whitneyraed]

Care About Others BUT, Put Yourself First #VentSesh

#VentSesh, don't care too much about others. Care about yourself and put yourself first! Surround yourself with good people. Only then you will be happiest -

I care a lot, a lot about other people. I think almost too much, as I haven’t been caring about myself much lately… I’ve been putting everyone else’s priorities before mine; and their happiness before mine. Which now, is hurting me more than ever. (SOMETHING NO-ONE SHOULD DO.)

I’ve been caring TOO much what others think of me or if i’ll let others down, and give them a reason to talk bad about…

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[stonerbunnygirl420]

My set up every morning. I often wonder why people dont have a ash tray with a lid because I sure do have one :P

[mothmanonthemoon]

We’ve come so far in the whole “let people enjoy what they want as long as it’s not hurting anyone” thing, but can some of y’all please stop acting like you’re better than everyone for not liking things like Star Wars and Harry Potter. It’s getting crusty and very boring and honestly you’re literally just doing the same “it’s cool to hate things that are popular” shit that y’all claim you’re against.

[jdagups]

Level up

Personal growth is essential

Honestly, this past year I’ve grown so much. With my own personal growth sometimes it goes to show somethings/people don’t change.

I’m regrounding myself. My values, my perspective, everything.

All I know is that I am growing with the season. I need to love myself fully and whole heartedly again before I even try to pour myself into someone else. I need to be happy independently rather than depending on someone. I need someone that compliments me and not completes me.

I know what I want in a lover, I know my worth, I know that me finding someone won’t happen anytime soon. But I know what I need to have a happy, loving, lasting relationship. I know what kind of love and happiness I am deserving of. All of this is my biggest lesson.

It’s gonna take time for sure. I’m taking this energy and using it as a driving force to keep me going. Keep on keeping on.

Cheers 2018, thanks for the lessons.

[iamhowlingmad]

I am a firm believer that heavy caffeination and hardstyle can bring my will to be alive