#venustxts

[imsobrooklyn-archived-sameurl]

🎥 Who is my muse’s celebrity crush?

          In my J. Cole voice, “♫My only regret was too young for Calma Carmona.♫”

@venustxts / NSFW & SFW HC.

[imsobrooklyn-archived-sameurl]

        “ Tsk. For real, do we have to talk about that? ” It didn’t occur to me just how whiny that sounded, but who’s thinking about that when my head is at war with itself? I wanted to go. Go out and express. Myself—to the world—that I. am. Someone. Recent happenings, at home, with my folks, at school, and on the streets, I wasn’t feeling like no one. Mind full of automatic gunfire, heart feeling like it wasn’t my own—like maybe I’m some demon, hosting a body and I don’t belong. 

           I mean, Mobb Deep said it better than the words I couldn’t form right now. I’m falling and I can’t turn back. After what I said, how I said it, to my own peoples? I was Miles Morales, but then I wasn’t. The Miles Morales that Rio and Jefferson raised wouldn’t raise his voice, lie and make his mother cry. He would have never fought his own father. What good son does that? Not Miles. So who am I? I don’t know, but I feel like a failure of a human being right now. 

           Somebody may want to tell me, it’s human, it happens to the best of us, you’re being dramatic, you’ll get over it, just say you’re sorry and everything will be will. Hah, like the cats up in Harlem say: ‘sho you right. Sounds about Ganke really. What he and you don’t understand is how traumatizing the scene I created was for me: my moms hollering and crying so hysterically that the neighbors had to check on us to make sure there we were all good. My father looking at me with so ferocity that I feared that he was going to kill me dead where the heck I stood. Last time I ran so hard is the day my uncle didn’t know who I was and was trying to leave me as a claws-ridden corpse in the middle of some Brooklyn street. That haunting scene keeps replaying in my head, over and over again. 

           I don’t know. I thought that maybe calling Alicia and seeing if she can have me over would be ideal. My bridge over troubled waters. Her Aretha Franklin playing from the Spotify program on her laptop spoke to my soul a little, perhaps cleansed it? Wishful. I didn’t need to hate myself right now. And I didn’t need to talk about it when I keep mentally seeing it over and over again. I can’t fault Alicia for her worries though. 

         I’m the one that came to her doorsteps with Tombstone’s gifts from his mean left and right planted all over my face. I’m the one that looked like a kicked puppy, with puffy red cheeks streaked with tears shed for my mom’s destroyed heart. I’m the one that let myself be escorted in somebody else’s home and into their bathroom so I can wash up. I’m the one sitting on another person’s bed, attempting to find a semblance peace that I can take for myself within the force and go full on Monk. She didn’t have to let me in and show kindness. She, like everybody else that loved me, deserved better from me than that. 

        I sighed softly. “ I.. ” My voice cracked. I cleared it with a harsh uhn-hemsz, mm-em-mm before I began speaking again “ I’m sorry, alright..? I didn’t mean give you attitude. I just don’t know to explain it to you and I don’t know if it’s even the right time to talk about that. Can we talk about something else, please? Like, what perfume is that? You have me thinking I interrupted a date night because you smell really good, girl. ” My smile wasn’t the cutest right now, but I did it to ease this—whatever we can call this vibe this is right now.

          Okay, don’t shoot me for that. It’s the best I got for a time like this. A smile and a compliment are the best I can offer her. The god honest truth, what she was asking for, I couldn’t deliver on that. I know I had to try, but how? Maybe when I figure out how to be open up, how to be honest, and how to be a good person I won’t feel like I've died with poison in my veins. Spider-man was really killing me.

@venustxts for Alicia Carson.

[imsobrooklyn-archived-sameurl]

☮ Are you feeling happy and inspired right now? ☘ Is there anything that makes you instantly want to follow someone? ☢ What calms you down after negativity?

☮ Are you feeling happy and inspired right now? 

- Yeah, knowing I’m making some form of money & keep them “get rich or die tryin’” schemes alive in my mind, while also knowing my kindle library still got books that need to be read & my fam/friends & queen is in good health keeps me happy. Even if I do aggravate some of them. lol. Inspired? In a way, yeah, because I’m gotta be my own idol and it’s nice to know I have people rooting for me.

☘ Is there anything that makes you instantly want to follow someone?

- If they’re role-playing a character I like and I feel like they’re doing them justice. Otherwise, if I’m just starting out on a new blog and it doesn’t generate traffic, I may insta-follow people and sort them out later. Kind of like leaving a bunch of fish hooks out in the sea and seeing which ones take the bite.

 ☢ What calms you down after negativity?

- It depends on the situation. If I may want to be a toxic gamer on Overwatch or w/e and completely demolish and troll my enemy team lol. I may listen to music with some brutal lyrics. I may read a book. I may talk to my homies or girl and blow off the steam ( this is the most commonly taken one ). I may write. I may uhh spank the mankey. Situational. Lmao.

@venustxts / hella sweet munday

[vartouhix]

“Okay, that is so wrong on so many… I don’t wanna fight your sister. That’s a family issue.” from raven!

thor ragnarök sentence starters ; accepting

Vartouhi’s brows furrowed. Her mouth slowly fell open as she leaned back slightly. “I– You– What?” she sputtered. The alien blinked rapidly a few times, as if trying to clear the cache in her head of sentences trying to form all at once. She shook her head just as quickly, holding up a hand. “No– She’s– Look. Raven. Had I simply omitted that information, I am certain you would not hold the reservations you are currently convinced hold any significance. As Beast Boy would say: spoiling alert–they’re not.” Vartouhi closed her eyes and took a deep breath to steel herself against the emotions attached to the thought of her sister; it wouldn’t help her argument for Raven to see how this upset her. When she opened her eyes, she had (mostly) succeeded. “That creature cannot be the real Albena. She… perished, a very long time ago. We need to talk about what could possibly be happening, because it certainly cannot be her.”

[imsobrooklyn-archived-sameurl]

Prospect Heights

         Victorious! When you speak it, the universe hears you. You're not supposed to think small, you're supposed to think Biggie, dummy. It’s mos’ def fabulous when a cat with the same as hue as you get that sauce money. I can’t even be shock, G—how can I even? It ain’t odd when the big homie been bent on beating the odds.

         C’mon, son. How many times did Jay-Z say it? Huh? Now listen, I don’t have nothin’ against the Boogie Down—I got love for everything New York, so big ups to the Gods, for they created this game. But when they say Brooklyn keeps on taking it, they mean Brooklyn keeps on taking it! From the dedicated d-boy that went from slangin’ rocks, it was inevitable that number one would be the one that was the head of the Roc. HOV! Yeah, I can’t be surprised, but I can and will be super psyched!

         “ Ayo, my bad, B, but hold up, hold up! ” I said excitably, resting a hand over Judge’s chest to stop him in the middle of his rap and gaining the attention of my entire class. I promise I’m a good listener, ya’ll but the alert I just got on my phone took absolute precedence over what my friend and roommate was talking about. It was honestly appropriate that it did because Judge was over here chattin’ about Lord Jamar’s gripe about Eminem being a culture vulture during his interview with VladTV and finding it whack that Lord Jamar thinks white privilege is what got Em this far in the rap game. In the back of my mind, I felt that however people may feel about that subject is their feelings and I’ll respect it. But the bigger picture history just painted us is black facts that can never be compromised and Em pales in comparison.

         It went without saying but I’ll say it: I was a volcanic, bubbling mess on the inside and I knew I was about to be as loud as the whole Puerto Rican side of mi familia on a good day, but to hell with it! “ It’s official, people! It’s just been announced that Jay-Z is the first Hip-Hop artist to become a billionaire! Brooklyn, BOY! WE IN HERE! ” When you know, you know—now it was the turn of Judge and the rest of the BK natives’ in the vicinity to turn up. They became louder than a gang of ratchets clappin’ at graduation and the tour guide and security didn’t bother to calm them down. It was a moment for everyone to relish in.

          Y'all may think we’re acting up just for the sake of acting up. Outsiders may not understand what the hype is all about but they should. I’ll tell anyone that should know the know: we’re celebrating because it’s amazing that a black kid that was once out there in the streets of Brooklyn, surviving by the mechanics of the underworld, transformed himself into Hip-Hop’s first successful black billionaire. Jay-Z been a charismatic idol from these parts, and now one can never say he’s not the embodiment of the black dream and the AmeriKKKan nightmare. We’re not all born with a silver spoon in our mouths, we have to get out there and do the dang thing. Jay’s legacy will forever instill hope into the youth and the older heads that are still out there struggling under the weight of the streets. I know it is for me.

         I hope ya’ll get where I’m coming from now. I let the energy accumulate as I soldiered my way through the tight crowd to get to the head of the line, so I can shoot the tour guide a giddy smile and say, “ Sorry I didn’t let you finish, ma’am, but I think you should talk to somebody soon about updating the Museum’s info on Sean Corey Carter. ” She looked down at me with a smile that was enhancing her crow’s feet ( fun thought: I didn’t notice it before, but she looked like she could be Morgan Freeman’s sister. Don’t get me wrong, thinking this didn’t distract from the fact she was a beautiful brown-skinned elder who has been presenting a wealth of knowledge since the start of this school trip. I may have to get with her after and talk to her about more things Brooklyn ). The tour guide nodded in agreement and got started on trying to calm down the teens, leaving me with the task of going back into the thick of my group, attempting to find Alicia at the end of it. It didn’t take long, she was standing right where I left her. 

          “ Hey, so I was thinking, right? ” I started, my head lit up with mad good ideas. “ I’m inspired to throw something up after this is done with. You wanna come with me to Marcy Projects, mami? ”

@venustxts

[wokegeta]

themes are free

        “And you would have me care for that frivolous piece of information.” A flat observation and accusation front and center of his statement’s purpose. Had he never picked up on her penchant for materialism, this subject regarding his aesthetics could’ve been baffling. Still, it doesn’t help the case that she just needed it to have relevance to his way of life. Or as reality would have it, their life. 

His ‘tch’ is sharp noise to the mindless noise he was without a doubt about to continue to hear from her. There are times—like now—where our prince believes Bulma doing the impossible and minding her own damn business is a luxury. One that he wishes she took advantage of and abused. If she freed up her trap for just a day, she wouldn’t know just how much relief that would bring to his headaches that she inadvertently causes on occasion. 

            “Eat your food. Don’t be wasteful.” Vegeta scolds, in a fashion similar to how he ordered the remnants of his squad when they babbled excitably over fresh carcasses. There’s a thought that threatens to shake a can of worms to war memories. It’s easily pushed off as an afterthought however, for he knows what he was truly aiming at: gaining control over the conversation and to harmlessly brush off her neediness for conversation. 

You can’t say he’s a oblivious man or call him a idiot—especially when it concerns particular nuances Bulma has been exposing him for a long time now. He just.. didn’t want to deal with it right now, if he can help it. To Earthlings, it may be petty to do so much in the act of avoidance. What’s the big deal of having a little banter with your own wife? Ask and he won’t provide the answer. And that’s the point. Social habitats is still territory he’s adjusting to in his own way. It can be noticeably tiring and that is why he prefers to have this dinner in relative silence.

@venustxts