A snippet from my Kandreil amnesia au. I swear I'm gonna finish it eventually...
Kevin stood in the middle of their room with an empty box in hand. He didn’t even know where to start. Their things were so mixed up that there was no set drawer or shelf of just Neil’s things. His running shorts shared space with Kevin’s workout gear. His bandanas were with Andrew’s spare arm bands. Neil’s charger was wrapped around Kevin’s lamp on his side table, where Andrew often plugged his own phone in. The hamper of clean clothes was a cluster of all of their shirts. Even the closet was a tangle of their lives. Jerseys hung beside each other, with hoodies and suits mixed in. It would take Kevin hours to sort through and separate all of Neil’s things.
“Kevin?” Nicky’s hand on his shoulder nearly had him choking on his heart.
“Fuck, Nicky, don’t you know how to knock?” he snapped.
“I did. Several times. You okay?” Nicky’s eyes fell to the empty box in his hands and his eyes softened.
“I don’t know how to do this,” he admitted. He and Nicky had never been particularly close, but if there was anyone he could talk to without judgment, it was Nicky.
“So let me. We don’t have to move everything. It’s only temporary, right? Let’s just get the basics for now.” He took the box from Kevin’s unresisting hands.
“What if it’s not?” he whispered.
“It will be. Even if he doesn’t remember. He fell for you guys once, he’ll do it again.”
Maybe that was true, but would Neil even allow that connection to develop? It had developed out of need and survival before. He’d trusted Kevin with his secrets and Andrew with his safety. There were no secrets or need for protection. There was no foundation to build their relationship on. “What if he doesn’t.”
Nicky set the box down and grabbed Kevin’s shoulders. “Then you get through it one day at a time.”
Kevin let out a shuddered breath. Just the thought of having to move on without Neil was almost enough to break him apart.