As time moves toward Dec 30th, I feel weird. Anxious. Sad. Like something is supposed to happen. But that's not it because the thing is, that's the date two years ago that something DID happen. My close, dear, intimate friend was murdered. That is a super hard word to say even if you've been reading and watching murder mysteries almost your whole life. I'm writing a piece ( I hope for Hello Humans) called MURDER MURDER MURDER and it was born of how awkward and weird it has been ~ for nearly two years now ~ to say that word. And get this: Vicki wasn't the first friend of mine to be murdered! Another friend, 30 years or so ago, was also murdered. But this was different. This is horrific and it's haunting. Like crazy, unbelievably HAUNTING.Maybe because it was a double murder suicide (and arson!). Vicki's sweet dad, Buddy ~ who was beloved in my hometown was also murdered. #dmsa And it was committed by someone I considered a friend for a long time and I cannot make myself stop associating it with the holidays. Today, I'm thinking about my sweet friend Jenni, who gets the double whammy of associating this nightmare with the holidays AND her birthday - she's not just my friend, she's my FAMILY - and I'm thinking about Vicki and Nan and me and how much fun we had ~ how much we laughed. Vicki, I love you. You would be so proud of Jenni and Phoenix. I love them too. We never did get our hands right. So silly. Look at me trying to give instructions! hahaha That was a perfect day at RenFest - like all the other perfect days at RenFest. . . #dmsa #doublemurdersuicideandarson #vickicave #love #memories #hope #faith #murder #friends #family #morelove @jennicaveferrell @katbaileyauthor @lee.partin.71 https://www.instagram.com/p/BrqAl5ThqDP/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=78gpmo0g5dp1