ok good cause let's talk abt... stalker!logan and stalker!wade who both have their sights set on ditsy!reader who likes to walk home at night through nyc with both headphones shoved in her ears and a sweatshirt to obscure her peripheral vision
it's a little competition between the two of them to see who will strike first, and justify their creepy behavior by saying they're 'protecting the public and ensuring the safety of everyone in new york city,' even when one of them is hiding out in an alley, fisting their cock to the sight of r in their little work uniform on the way home </3
cw stalking. MDNI 18+
logan doesn't know why he let wade rope him into this. he's been letting wade rope him into a lot recently. one thing after another, and logan's starting to think his morals are weaker than he thought.
because no man with a good moral compass would agree to stalking someone, even in the name of protection.
it's what wade says, "we're keeping her safe! just making sure she doesn't get snatched up by some psycho who wants to turn her into a sex slave". and the logic was sound enough for logan at the time.
but being here now, following you down the street, logan felt more like a predator than a protector.
logan just follows you home the first few times. he's trying to stick to the good side of it all, walking a safe distance behind you, keeping his eye out for any actual predators that could pose a threat to you. he does this without wades knowledge, a little mission of his own.
but then wades leaving one night, right around the time they you get off of work, and logan's right there with him. both of them walking down the street, following your every move, up until they can't take it anymore.
for logan, the scent of you just does him in. he can smell everything-the faint essence of greasy food lingering on your clothes, your perfume remnants on your wrists, your laundry detergent, your cunt. logan doesn't know what did it for wade, knowing him, it could just be the sight of you practically skipping down the street.
but suddenly they're tucked in an alleyway right across from your house, having arrived before you and waiting for you to enter your home. their hands down their pants, their groans as muffled as they could get them, the saliva of the other used to glide their touch over their cocks.
wade would for sure quote tati westbrooks 'time and place!'
do not show him that video because he’s running it into the ground. “time and place!” whenever you’re literally just chilling, possibly being platonically cute with logan (wade’s definitely jealous). “and you did it at my birthday dinner,” is a vocal stim for him for at least two weeks.
ok no joke do you think deadpool fucks with chappell roan. like if red wine supernova came on in the car would he or would he not be singing his heart out.
ohhh this could go either way.
route 1: he likes it. he compares her to kate hudson w a little madonna flair. he loves her theatrics and her costumes, especially when it pisses off other people (ie her nun outfit).
route 2: he labels it "gen z garbage" and refuses to like her, but will accidentally hum the vocal flip part of picture you while he's combing his hair system to lay flat.
car sex; cucking; mutant reader MDNI 18+
w/ LOGAN HOWLETT ft. WADE WILSON
chronically thinking about logan in that fuckass honda odyssey, but just fucking him. yeah, maybe there's blood every fucking where. maybe some of your wounds are still healing as are his. but the main event is the way his large body takes up the entire reclined seat, the pants of his suit pushed down to bunch at the center of his thighs. his gloves are still on as they grip at your bare hips, guiding you up and down on his cock.
everything about it was hasty. the center of your suit was peeled open to reveal your tits, your bottoms thrown in the drivers seat along with most of your weapons. in the midst of the battle you'd lost a few of them.
the odyssey might be a large car, but you barely have any space. one hand pressed up into the forever stained roof, the other pressed into logan's shoulder where your gun blew a hole only a few minutes ago. of course it's healed now, but the evidence is still there.
"this doesn't..." you try to speak but then logan thrusts up into you and he hits a spot that has your head lolling to the side, your lips parted and you think there's a bit of drool gathering at the corner. "this doesn't mean you won, by the way," you're eventually able to slip out through breathy gasps.
logan grins below you, looking completely relaxed and in control of the entire situation. "i think it does, bub." he tilts his head as he says it, scrunching his nose with an air of superiority.
and through it all, there's wade in the backseat, attempting to back seat drive all while holding his cock in his hand. he calls your name, getting your attention from logan's eyes to the white slits in wade's mask.
"do that thing where you pull his little ears again. he likes that, don't you big boy?"
you're just about to do it in the name of curiosity by then logan reaches back with his claws revealed and slashes wade's thigh. when wade groans, you can't tell if it's out of pain or pleasure. knowing him it's likely both.
