r. cole-alves. –– @warcarried
❛ you either think pretty highly of yourself or pretty lowly of me. ❜ if there’s a frigidness to her tone, make no mistake, it was meant to be there.
matt always picks at the places where she rips off the scabs with his ‘ holier than thou ’ bullshit, all while frank tries to clumsily bandage them with an emotional spectrum that is usually as busted up as his face. one reassures her that she’s alive, the other is relentless with the concept that she’s not - so what does that make elektra in the scheme of things ?? empathy doesn’t seem to be that signature shade of red, and she’s nowhere near as tactless as matt or as protective as frank. though it seems it makes her no less annoying.
the place where kevlar stopped bullet blooms in shades of purple and red, muscles under skin tensed with a looming and undeniable frustration. somehow, it feels like they all just latch onto her / she’s quite literally done with the exchange and, in all regards to the idea of finished, done with dragging her feet as well. death sits on the forefront of her mind with long, sticky fingers - an the intervene made by one assassin just prolongs something so wildly inevitable.
she wonders if it was matt’s persistent nagging and inflated idea that perhaps he can save her soul, or if it was frank castle’s inability to let her jump on that metaphorical grenade.
❛ i wasn’t scared. ❜ she will have no accusations made here / she can’t remember the last time she was truly scared, anyway. ❛ and you messed up his clean shot. ❜
for some reason, to the assassin, the words stung more than it’s supposed to. ‘you seem to think highly of yourself.’ oh, if only you’d know, rachel –– elektra never thinks highly of herself. underneath all the arrogance and indifference encapsulated by her steel black eyes lies nothing but a scared little girl. a girl who has been abandoned by all the people she cared about. stick, orestez, even matthew in the past. it’s as if when given a choice, they’d choose to leave because ... who’d even have the time to deal with this mess of a girl? she’s not worth the effort. she’s not worth saving. just ask hugo. ask matthew. the former died when elektra could’ve saved him. the latter has to deal with the aftermath of her presence in his life, and needless to say, his life is ruined because of her.
so ... is she brave? no. she’s not. she’s scared, but she doesn’t let people see that because people use your vulnerability against you –– and elektra has no intention of being vulnerable. vulnerability is a weakness and in her line of work, being weak is not an option. so a heartless assassin she shall become, that way, you’re untouchable.
however, she hates that somehow a part of her still wants to be a hero. how a part of her still wants to live up to what matthew said about her, how she has goodness in her. ( but she’s not good! she’s nothing but a monster! )
“well, ms. cole-alves,” elektra spites. “i’m only doing this as a favour. mr. matthew murdock sends you his regards.” she bites her lips. “and between you and me: death will get you no where. look at me –– not even death could save me from my pain.”