I just woke from the most peculiar dream, I'm guessing because of the shock at what was happening to me. It is 3.43 am. I'm having a weeks holiday in Northumberland and I've been up early each morning and walking along the coast. So by yesterday afternoon I was pretty tired and succumbed to an hour's afternoon kip before heading out once more with Darcy in the dark. But by 10.30pm I was back asleep in bed....until now. My younger brother, wife and 16 year old son visited us on Sunday, at the village we are staying in. And we had a lovely walk to Dunstanburgh Castle and beyond in the sunshine. But in my dream the four of us were walking through the backstreets of some rather grey fishing village type place. I had my boots on and embarrassingly only a rather small red outdoor coat to wrap around my body. I had absolutely nothing else on, no shirt, trousers or even underwear. Having wrapped the coat around my front to maintain some modesty my white buttocks were entirely exposed at the back. Fortunately there were only a few female Chinese tourists about.. Luckily I had some other clothes I was carrying in my arms and I asked my brother and wife to watch for some little alleyway I could pop into and get properly dressed. We spotted one and I set off down it to change in the secluded area at the end of it. But the path down to it sloped gently and was made up of a long series of downwards steps made of yellow paving slabs. This was horribly difficult to negotiate in my nakedness, clasping a load of clothes to my chest because apparently I was now on a skateboard, something I have never previously been able to master. Nevertheless I miraculously made it to the bottom of the steps without any grazes or painful falls to the hidden point at the end of the alley. I dropped the coat quickly and held up the clothes I had been carrying to let them hang the right way up to put on. I was horrified to discover that rather than mens clothes I had somehow ended up with my 85 year old mother's mauve knitted one piece dress. Nothing for it I thought as I pulled it over my head rejoicing in the woolly feeling all over my bare body although leaving the golden hairs on my calfs protruding until they disappeared into my chunky walking boots. I thought I could get away with it in front of the Chinese tourists but my brother and his wife thought it hilarious. And it was at this point I woke up. And for the first time discovered I am 61. it seems my mind is unravelling! There you have it. My dreams: no violence, no sex, no hope. At least it is a change from the nightmare of Brexit. It's all downhill from here! I'm going back to sleep now! Link
