#we're making changes

[connordavidscamera]

okay... I think I’m done with changes for now. But if you haven’t seen it already, I’m working on a new taglist! 

Let me know if you want to be on my Shawn list, Connor, or both! Also, if you’re already being tagged and wish to be moved or removed, just let me know! Thank you!!

[ohlehdewwwit]

the world does not revolve around you.  MY world does not revolve around you.  just because i have to attend to other people and other things does not mean i don't love you anymore.  i'm sick of being made to feel guilty about doing what i need to do for my group as a whole.  

i know i may sound hypocritical because i acted in a very similar way last year (in a much different context), but as much as i hated sections of last year and as much as last year made me want to die in many ways, it was one of the greatest lessons i've ever received.  it was a huge learning opportunity.  and it was a huge wake up call as well.  i'm NOT the same as i was before.  and i'm pretty proud of that fact because i was too clingy.  too emotional.  too inclined to take everything personally.  i threw too many pity parties for myself.  i played the victim too often.  i pointed blame on other people and always had a way to defend what i was doing, even if it was completely off-base and, for lack of a better term, stupid.  let's just say last year allowed a great deal of time for self-reflection and "growing up."  i refuse to be that person who is used and taken advantage of for always being nice.  i'm working on standing my ground and telling it how it is, even if it makes the person i'm talking to dislike me for a little while.  maybe i don't need to be liked.  i do, however, need to be respected.  i demand it.  i deserve it.  

anyway, i digress.  yes, i'm different than i was, but that doesn't mean i'm worse.  you just think i'm worse because i'm not giving you everything you want like i did last year.  i'm not making sacrifices in order to make you happy.  i'm not putting you before all of my other responsibilities.  i'm sorry if it makes you feel like i don't care about you; i do care about you.  i care about all of my kids very much.  i can't drop everything and everyone to cater to you at all times.  i don't have the time.  i don't have the energy.  if that's gonna be a problem, you either need to readdress the way in which you look at certain situations, or you need to kindly see yourself out.  i refuse to have drama this year.  it's all squashed.  so please don't bring any of it back.  thanks.