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Embrace Your Inner Weirdo
In my family, being weird has always been considered a good thing.
I am weird. They are weird, too.
Hearing Jeff, talk at the concert about being weird and how it was a good thing, was as much music to my ears as his beautiful voice singing the English version of WDYS and DAMN, I love that song!
Peak quarantine vibes, ladies night edition
I will be updating “What of love? ☆彡” every Sunday until it’s finished! “What is Normal?” Will be updated every Saturday until it is finished! I appreciate all the positive feedback I have received and I am so grateful for the notes the posts have received! As just beginning to post, it feels like the biggest blessing! So thank you!!!!
Pride reflections 2019 (pt 1)
So for this year's Pride reflections, I need to back track a little so you can follow my thoughts. So this is something I write back in October 2017 about a month before I went on my first Side B retreat..
Out of the numerous dreams I've had for myself throughout my childhood and have stayed with me into adulthood my private desire to be "normal" always seems to surprise people. I guess when you're quiet people don't realize how different you really are. That way they can forget or ignore your past and the things that happened. I tried for a really long time to seem "normal" because I didn't want people to see that I was damaged, and wasn't just all pretend either. I actually made it out and managed to live my dream. I moved out of my small town and out of the country. I traveled parts of the world and mastered a second language. I married an amazing, tall, dark, Christian man from a foriegn country who is absolutely crazy about me. Wasn't I normal now? The thing is, it was never how I looked that made me feel different. My mind felt different. No matter how much I looked like everybody else I know that I think and feel differently.
And I always found it so curious. Shouldn't I turn out like the environment I was raised in? There are definitely things that I'm glad I never picked up, but I can't for the life of me figure out why. And it's one thing to feel things differently, but I feel them so strongly and it feels so personal. I guess can only hide for so long. Yet, honesty and sincerity are met with such resistance when they don't match up with the norm. I guess the right question to ask is, "do I really want to be 'normal' or do I just want to be accepted?"
When did I laugh?
When in Far Cry Experience Vaas Montenegro shot a guy (chained to a rock) with a granade launcher.
When Trevor Phillips in his first appearance killed a “Lost” guy and I hit his girlfriend with a car after that.
When Clancy Jarvis grabbed a valve and it was broken and then Clancy was burned to death.
When girls from my group at the university reminded me that when we was third-year students I frightened our professor to the point when she just pressed herself in her chair and just gave me my good grade so I will leave asap.
When did I actually cry?
When I poured yogurt into my coffee instead of milk, because the packages were similar, and it ruined my coffee.
->
i do not believe i am normal, but i have friends who still love me and care about my wellbeing, so i think im doing ok.