I don't think Teddy Altman was ever in love with Owen. I think she was messed up from a love she both was overwhelmed with shame from that she kept secret that ended with a tragic death that made her uproot her entire life then join an institution she wasn't a supporter of. She meets Owen, and he's nice, he makes her laugh, he makes her forget, but most importantly: he's not available. I think she loves him like a friend, but her core romantic view is completely distorted by infatuation and the need to love the unattainable. That's why she self sabotages the first time he's available and clearly loves her. She does want a family with him and she does want the idea of him and she does miss her best friend, but her view of Owen is a coping mechanism of grief of a love she can't even speak about yet names her daughter after.