As funny as it is that rocky sees grace and complains about grace and humans in general as a terribly inefficient blob of water and fluids and teases constantly...
I REALLY think this should be a relatively rocky-exclusive perspective. He's watched this incredibly stressed human drip all kinds of tears and goos while they were floating around in space, and grace let down basically all of his guard around rocky personally, have discussed and understood eachother over life threatening missions. To Rocky, grace is Grace!
But grace does have some naturally combative push to him (see, the commentary that got him stonewalled in the scientific community in the first place, and being able to keep up with and handle Eva stratt) and further more, when an eridian is Not Rocky, i.e. not incredibly socially withdrawn and traumatized and maybe on their own spectrum of divergence before his ill fated mission and was very susceptible to latching onto a strange and unusual creature in just as much crisis as him...
That is to say. The eridians are going to meet grace with wildly different priorities and expectations. And what they're going to get is a human dangerously close to deaths door, and cornered and dying humans aren't always the most friendly or cooperative and kind, even the Nicest Humans You Can Get.
So they get a dying human. And as tumblr loves to say, humans are terrifying to aliens, and fuck do they persist. Rocky's so-described "pathetic space blob" grace is terrifying to most eridians, especially the scientists studying him.
He drinks solvent and breaths combustion. Instead of simply dying when his body runs out of nutrients and calorie stores, it has begun to Digest Itself. His body is pumping chemicals they do not understand and every chemistry panel they run shows new levels of new chemicals and hormones. The human body replaces most of its cells constantly because even breathing, especially at a higher atmospheric pressure, is destroying their own lungs.
This thing "hears" things they cannot comprehend and he is unable to describe beyond "color" and "brightness" which are things you can not contextualize, and calls the strangest things beautiful. It has no entirely discernable traits you can understand ecologically as a predator- no armor, no weapons- and yet it eats meat and that is one of the many nutrients it needs to survive. You as a resident of erid do not have many creatures with "eyes" and so have no idea that the strongest mark of a predator is neither claw nor fang, but forward facing eyes, all the better to catch your prey, to meet a foe head on and fearless. You just know it "sees" and that it eats meat, and many other complicated things.
And in place of not receiving all those nutrients, it's body will litterally digest itself and keep going without them. Oh, this new chemical in it's latest blood panel allows it to ignore it's own pain to the point it won't realize it's injured. It can wake up from a dead sleep if you are too loud or too "brightness" around it. It speaks in an archaic graveling noise and is capable of imitating the strangest things, including a haunting near-vocalization of the eridani language of its own, which it calls "singing" and it does this at the strangest of times, when happy and when nervous. It is neither fast nor slow, but over time and observation, you realize this strange towering bipedal creature expends an entirely minimal amount of energy to walk, a process of controlled falling turned mobilization. You hypothesize that for lack of predatory weaponry like claws or sharp teeth, this thing simply evolved to follow you. To "see" you with it's forward facing eyes even in total stillness, total silence, and follow for as long as it takes: it won't spend much energy, and it won't starve waiting for you to exhaust. It'll start digesting *itself* while waiting for it's prey to lay down and have to sleep. It will "watch" you sleep with "eyes." You cannot wake up the way it can, and it will eventually catch up to you.
Also sometimes it cries excess amounts of saline rich solvent when you compliment it's latest research paper. Rocky calls him an idiot and the overseeing eridian scientists watch on with a sense of morbid eldrich horror. Right, right, just a "leaky space blob", sure.
They're kind of terrified of the future delegations with this planet. They litterally get to space by explosion. Not only are they scary- they're INSANE. And they're told the one they have is "a push over".
Summary: In which someone makes a bet that they wouldn't catch you if you ran towards them at full speed while their hands are full. So, you decided to test it out.
Characters: Illuga, Lohen, Xiao, Kinich
Illuga
Absolutely, 100%
Would drop everything in his hands just to catch you even if he was holding something precious or fragile. The only time he wouldn't catch you would be if he was holding something sharp or dangerous, anything that could potentially harm you if he accidentally dropped you.
“!? W-Wait! I'm still holding onto Sir Flins’ supplies!! If you fall—”
Despite his increasingly panicked attempts at persuasion, his body moved quicker than his mind. In less than a second, his hands had already dropped everything onto the floor and his feet were planted firmly into the ground, arms spread widely to catch you just in the nick of time
Uses his entire body to cushion the impact and slow you down, making sure that even if the two of you were to fall, he would be the one hitting the ground first. Luckily, his feet were planted firmly enough into the ground that none of you ended up tumbling onto the ground, with yourself landing safely into his arms.
After double (maybe triple) checking that you weren't hurt, he proceeds to chew your ear off for the next hour or so, reprimanding you for your reckless and irresponsible actions. That was far too dangerous! What if he slipped before he could catch you!?
“Don't ever do something so reckless again. If you do, don't expect me to catch you again (｀ヘ´)”
He absolutely would. But he would also prefer if you were to greet him normally next time instead of giving him a heart attack
… At least the feeling of carrying you in his arms more than makes up for it
(More below the cut)
Lohen
“Oh?”
He watched as you hurled yourself towards his direction, intrigue and a hint of puzzlement sketched onto his face
Depending on the time of day, there's a 50% chance Lohen would open his arms and catch you so that the two of you would fall together, as well as another 50% chance that he'll wait right up until the moment you're almost in front of him, step aside and then catch you just as you were about to fall face first into the ground. What can he say? An eye for an eye, a surprise for a surprise.
Honestly, he finds your trust in him rather endearing. Even though you know that he has a million tricks up his sleeves, you still chose to run towards him at full speed with your arms wide open, not caring if he was in the mood to catch you or not. It made his heart sing with pride, knowing that you had such blind trust in him.
Fortunately for you, he decided to play nice today and catch you immediately. The moment he tosses everything away and your body hits his, one of his hands curls around the back of your head while his other arm slyly snakes around your waist, keeping you pressed as closely to him as possible even when his back hits the gravel below.
“Too bad. Such tricks just aren’t enough to catch me off guard, darling.”
He doesn't try to fight back the wolfish grin surfacing on his face, nor say a word back when you start complaining. Only when you start trying to lift yourself off of him does he make his move. In the blink of an eye, he rolls over and pins you down into the same patch of gravel he was once lying on top, trailing his hand slowly from the back of your head down the back of your neck, all the way to your collarbones.
“Next time, don't announce yourself before you start running— not like that would stop me from sensing your presence beforehand anyways~”
Xiao
“Absolutely, 100%” the sequel
Wouldn't even think before dropping everything to catch up to you. He would even take a few steps forward to lessen the amount of time it would take for you to reach him before patiently waiting for your arrival with his arms wide open, counting down the seconds until you found your way home
Just like the first time he caught you back at the Jade Chamber, his arms are firmly wrapped around yours. Only this time, instead of them being over your shoulders, they are pressed closely yet warmly against your back, gently pushing you to fall deeper into his arms until your head hits his chest
“Did you need me?”
He asks in a calm, steady voice, thinking that any matter that required you to run to his side with such urgency without calling his name was one of utmost importance. If you had called, he would've undoubtedly reached your side in a moment's notice, perhaps even before his name had fully even left your lips. Too quickly? Nonsense. In his eyes, that was the least he should do.
When you told him that you simply wanted to see if he would drop everything just to catch you, he would blink in surprise before letting out a scoff so soft that it couldn't be called anything but fondness.
“If you think our bond was that weak, you needn't test me. I wouldn’t have appeared before you if you didn't mean anything to me.”
After a flicker of hesitation passed his face, he lowered his face and awkwardly nuzzled his forehead against yours, suppressing the urge to look away in order to whisper against your lips.
“... Since you're here now, can you stay a little longer? There’s a plate of almond tofu here that I would like you to try… Who made it?... I… cannot say.”
Kinich
“Ajaw”
“???”
“Catch”
“！？！？ KINICH YOU @%£@%@£@%£@@%@%£@££@%@%%@£@”
Tosses everything to Ajaw and forces him to catch it all before opening his arms as wide as possible, readily bracing for your impact
Honestly, if he had more time to prepare, he would’ve preferred putting everything aside to make better preparations on how to catch you. However, since the things he was holding onto were needn't to complete a commission, he had no choice but to rely his closest companion (which unfortunately had to be Ajaw) and improvise on the spot
Luckily, all that time he spent carrying you around his house before had taught him all he needed to know. Before you had even reached him, he took a few steps forward and waited for you to skid to a stop. Once you did, he ceremoniously placed one arm behind your knee, one arm behind your back and BAM— a princess carry.
“... Should I ask?”
He raises a questioning brow, waiting for you to speak. Once you finish your explanation, he simply sighs before pressing a tender kiss to the top of your head, looking down at you with a mix of exasperation and affection.
“The price for scaring me doesn't come cheap. I hope you're ready to pay for that stunt you just pulled tonight.”
I have some questions about karaoke night, Alex Hirsch. Very Important Questions. Which I will happily scream at a poor hapless baby triangle who can have no answers for me, and possibly also does not have object permanence yet.
Follow-up that is I guess suggestive, but let's be real here, Bill's a fucking triangle:
Dude slipped right into his birthday suit, lmao
this is so stupid :D
Anyway, I don't care what anyone says, this brilliant individual knows what's up - Bill is absolutely way more of a monsterfucker than Ford could or ever will be, full stop.
whenever i say i don't agree with punishing "difficult" kids, i often get people (usually older people) rolling their eyes, or telling me, "that's optimistic. clearly you haven't worked with really bad kids."
and okay, fair enough - i've never worked in, say, a young offender's institution, or a secure children's home. i've mostly worked in schools. i haven't seen firsthand how bad it can get. i still don't think punishment actually works, and i also think that even kids who misbehave on purpose (and kids do misbehave on purpose; it'd be naive to claim otherwise) aren't doing it because it's "fun". they're doing it because they want to achieve a certain outcome, and they are using the tools that are available to them.
so they need better tools. and better options. and someone to help them figure out how to achieve that same outcome without resorting to theft, manipulation, or violence. that's not easy to do, especially with older children whose behavioural patterns are more entrenched, but it's infinitely more effective and less traumatising than punishment.
i want to illustrate this by talking about a former student of mine. i never actively disliked any of the children i worked with, but i do remember finding this one kid very difficult to warm to. i'd been warned before meeting him that he was a Bad Kid, and i soon found out why. he swore, spat, screamed, threw things, stole or destroyed other people's possessions, and was verbally and physically aggressive towards both me and his classmates.
i could deal with all that. what bothered me was how manipulative he was. he was a bully, but it was hard to catch him at it; he had a knack for sussing out when certain children were having a rough time, and then he'd subtly needle and torment them until they exploded - hitting him or themselves, tearing up their work, kicking desks over, having a sobbing meltdown, etc. after which he would come to me and gleefully inform me that so-and-so had "been bad", clearly with the expectation that i would then punish them (which, obviously, i did not).
this behaviour seemed very calculated, which is why i found it unnerving. but the why kept niggling at me. why was he doing this? what did he want the outcome to be?
and as soon as i thought about it, it was obvious. he wanted validation ("well done for telling me, that was very responsible!"). he wanted to feel powerful. he wanted everyone else to be exactly as angry and unhappy as him. he wanted to not be seen as the Bad Kid - or he wanted his peers to know what it was like to be the Bad Kid. it was intentional, but it was also a product of helplessness and desperation.
as soon as i realised that, i stopped feeling unnerved by his behaviour and just felt profoundly sad. at just seven years old, this kid had already fully internalised the idea that he was Bad, and the only way he could make himself feel better was by forcing other people to be Bad as well. viewed through that lens, his behaviour made complete sense. if your lot in life is to be Bad, and you can't change that, why would you even bother trying to be Good?
