#whump carlos

[carlosreyesazwhump]

G - Gasping

Summary: Carlos enters a fire when a kid is in danger. He enters without any equipment. He says he's ok, he can go home and he thinks he will sleep until TK comes back from his shit. Things doesnt' happen as he wish

It was rare for Carlos not to see TK or the rest of the 126 team on a call. But that day he had been assigned to a different part of town. Still, seeing members of another barracks go into the fire or seeing another ambulance taking care of people in the building block injured by the fire or who had swallowed too much smoke was strange to him.

"Relaxed day for you, eh Reyes?"

He turned to Mitchell who patted him on the back.

"Why do you say that?"

"Because TK nor anyone else in your firefighting family is here. Nothing can happen to them." Carlos looked at her blankly. "You should see yourself when they're the ones getting into fires, you stop breathing and if on top of that it's TK who has to get into a fire.

Carlos laughed. He could imagine that face when he saw TK enter a dangerous place. His heart would race, sometimes he would stop breathing, it was true, and he would get hysterical until he saw him come out.

Mitchell was right, he had a hard time worrying about his family.

He didn't have time to answer because an announcement came over the radio. "Attention all units. We have a minor trapped in the basement."

"We have no free units."

"We need more units." Said another voice over the radio.

"129 en route."

"Five minutes."

"Five minutes with a kid in there is too much." Carlos said quietly. He turned around and looked around for someone who could help but there were more cops, civilians and injured than firefighters and paramedics and everyone was busy. "Mitchell, I'm going in."

"What do you mean you're going in? You can't go in, you don't have the equipment and that place is full of smoke."

"Precisely because it's full of smoke I can't leave a child in there."

Mitchell knew she could do nothing against that look on Carlos' face. They had known each other too long already.

"Okay, you go in, but I want you at all times with the radio on and every five minutes you tell me how you're doing."

Getting in, getting to the basement and finding the boy was easy enough, at least considering he was all covered in smoke and could barely see anything. He tried to cover his mouth and nose as he had been taught, as many times TK and the rest of the 126th had told him. He walked as low as he could, he knew that smoke weighs more than air.

The boy, a kid who couldn't have been more than eight years old, was huddled between the washing machines in the building. He didn't want to come out at first, terrified that everything was filling up with smoke too fast.

But somehow Carlos managed to gain his trust, get him to accept his hand and follow him out of the building.

Carlos coughed as he reached outside, suddenly the clean air outside bothered his throat and lungs. But it felt good to see the paramedics take the boy away and bring him to safety. He was sure that in no time, the little boy was with his parents and that alone was worth it.

"Kings! Carlos!" Mitchell swept her hand in front of Carlos' face to get his attention. "Are you alright? You need to let them take a look at you?"

"I'm fine, I've only been in there a few minutes, I haven't breathed enough smoke."

"Carlos..."

"I'm serious. I'm fine and I live with a paramedic, if anything happens I'm going straight to the ER."

Mitchell murdered him with a glare, but again she knew there wasn't much more she could do to hold him back. She knew that if TK was there, if Captain Strand or any of his buddies were there, they would manage to hold him off or even make him go straight to the hospital.

But she got nowhere.

"You tell TK as soon as you see him."

"Okay, okay. Relax, it's all under control, I've only been in there five minutes and barely breathed any smoke."

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L - Lung Distress

L - Lung Distress

He opened his mouth — bad idea when you are underwater — and his throat, his lungs, his whole body was drowned by the liquid that was pulling him from outside. All around him was water and silence. Cold and water. Loneliness and death... Carlos knew that if he didn't get out of the water, it wouldn't be long before he was dead, but the uniform weighing down his body was making things almost impossible, the tiredness from the minutes he had been fighting... Or maybe it had only been seconds.

He had never done the test to find out how long he could hold his breath underwater, without breathing... holding his breath. But he had stopped doing that, he had stopped holding it and the water was rushing through his body, searing his veins. It was also burning his muscles and his brain was about to explode.

He could barely think anymore and felt himself falling, sinking, being pulled down, or was it up because he was dying and his body was about to surface.

They would find him like this, swollen from the water inside his body, pale, perhaps disfigured. Maybe there were fish or flesh-eating creatures in the water and then TK... no... no... TK would have to identify his fish-eaten body. He couldn't put him through something like that.

Not to TK, not to his parents, not to anyone who cared about him.

He had to fight for all of them, because he had already pulled the woman out of the water, now it was his turn, he had to get out of the water, resist and fight... It hurt but he had to fight. If only because if he died, he knew that TK would too.

No matter the reason, getting out of the water and surviving was the most important thing now. When he got to land he would worry about what would happen next.

He kicked in the water as hard as he could, though he barely moved and maybe that was why, because he wasn't moving and was only going down...always down, to the bottom of the lake where he would be lost forever.

"TK..." he thought in one of his last breaths. "I'm trying... I promise I'm trying, I'm fighting to get back to you, but I can't. I'm tired, I can't take it anymore… I want to get out, I know I'll die if I don't, I know you'll die if I don't and that's why I keep kicking, but I know it's too much."

When his hand suddenly touched the surface, he clutched his fingernails to the earth beneath him. He hurt himself but pulled his other hand out of the water and dug his other nails into the earth as well.

He pulled his body. He was exhausted, and literally couldn't breathe, but he kept pulling until half his body was out. No, he couldn't breathe, he couldn't get any air into his lungs, and when he breathed in nothing happened.

His body fell forward, he could still feel the water on his legs; if he wasn't careful the water would take him in again, but he had used his last bit of strength to get there, so that someone would see him before it was too late.

"TK..." he muttered as everything went black, and death quickly took over his being.

"Has anyone seen Carlos?" Mitchell asked, walking through the wreckage of the multiple accident.

Five cars and two trucks had been involved because of the slippery ground in the middle of an ice-covered road. They had skidded all over the place, one of the cars had fallen down a slope and had come very close to a lake. The two trucks had collided causing a fire that the 126 was taking care of while Tommy's ambulance and crew were tending to the injured, waiting for more ambulances to arrive.

Mitchell and Carlos had been among the first to arrive. They had taken two of the drivers of the cars to safety and had split up to help with the other vehicles involved in the accident, but it had been a while since they had seen each other.

She had tried to call him on the radio, but Carlos had not answered. With all the craziness they were in the middle of, they hadn't had a chance to see each other again and now she was worried about him.

"TK," she called out to him as she saw them close the ambulance door and get ready to leave. "I don't want to worry you and I'm sure it's silly but I haven't been able to reach Reyes… Carlos. Have you talked to him?"

"Um, no. Now that you mention it I've been so busy with stitches and bandages that I didn't realize we haven't talked. Why?"

"I don't know, I have a...weird feeling and Carlos always answers my radio messages. But today... This will be silly, I know, but it's been a while since he last answered me."

"Hold on, I'm going to call him," TK said.

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K - Kidney damage

K - Kidney damage

Carlos took his bag out of the jeep and looked at the ranch in front of them. It looked a lot like his parents', but Owen had insisted on taking him to one he'd seen on Trip Advisor that they recommended as the best retreat for a weekend.

He'd also made a point of paying for the stay and driving himself.

"He's on edge," TK had told his fiancé the night before.

"Why is he nervous? He knows me well, we see each other every day. I'm the one who should be nervous about going on a trip with Captain Strand, my fiancé's father, on our first outing and on top of that without you."

Saying that had made him nervous.

"Come on, Carlos. You'll see how great everything turns out. He's nervous because it's the first time he's had any kind of relationship with the guy I'm dating and more specifically with my future husband. I'm sure you've had good relationships with your ex's families."

Carlos stared at him silently and gave nothing away.

TK burst out laughing, apparently both Carlos and his father were in the same nervous and uncomfortable situation. He didn't say anything to either of them but was glad he wasn't in the middle of that situation and that they were taking the opportunity to get to know each other better.

"Let him take care of everything. I assure you he's not the type to expect you to do anything or pay for anything. He wants to organize everything, prove he's still the alpha male of the pack."

"Sounds a lot like your father.”

"I know, I know him well. So have fun and don't worry about anything."

Carlos turned around at the sound of Owen's voice from the other side, who was already looking at the phone listing the best places in the area to eat and the best places to visit.

"Let's leave the stuff in the rooms and then we can go for a walk," the captain told him. "I've booked the first contact with the horses in a couple of hours and then we can go eat. I've seen a place that they say has the best beef in Texas. What do you think?"

Carlos smiled and remembered TK's words. His father wanted to get everything organized and under control. So he nodded and let the captain take control of the weekend.

As soon as he got to the room and dropped off his bag, Carlos took the opportunity to call TK and tell him everything was going well, but his boyfriend was working and didn't answer his call. So he left him a message.

"We’re going for a ride with the horses. Your dad seems excited about riding. He doesn't seem to have as much respect for it as you say. I'll tell you later. I love you."

Owen was already waiting for him at the stable, stroking the back of the huge animal he was going to ride.

"Ready to teach him the secrets of a good horseman?"

"Owen, I hope you didn't get your hopes up too high about me. I can ride and I'm not afraid of horses, but I'm no expert."

"Well, you certainly know how to do it a lot better than I do."

Larry, the stable attendant, came over to them and gave them the directions they needed to do their first lesson with their mount. When Carlos told him that he had spent his teenage years riding horses on his parents' ranch, it seemed to lift a weight off Larry's shoulders.

"Well, I see you're not city tourists coming to feel like John Wayne."

"He's not. I... Let's just say John Wayne movies aren't my benchmark," Owen said, looking at Carlos, and he received an appreciative smile. "But yes, the world of cowboys and the idea of freedom of riding a horse has always appealed to me and terrified me in equal parts."

"Better to go with someone who knows, then."

Riding was easy, it wasn't the first time Owen had done it and getting going wasn't a complication either.

Larry told them to take a ride around to get a feel for the animals, that horses get used to them. He also told them that a good horse ride gave plenty of opportunity to talk.

They didn't do it at first. They were both nervous, it was the first time they were alone and not because of work, not with TK in the way or Carlos' parents.

They were completely alone taking a walk in their hair for the rest of the afternoon and neither of them were very clear on what to say or how to behave with the other.

So for a while, they were silent and simply rode around the meadow.

"TK and I are organizing the wedding, what a mess we've gotten ourselves into and we wanted something small," Carlos said at last, trying to end the awkward silence.

"I know you want to do this by yourselves, but you know you can count on me for whatever it takes. I'm good at organizing things and I know a lot of people around here."

"I know, I know. But we want to keep the wedding small, intimate, and not get out of hand."

Owen pulled his horse closer to Carlos'.

"I promise I won't butt in where I'm not wanted. I'll only do something if you ask for my help."

"Sorry, I didn't mean it to sound like that. TK and I are really nervous about all this because we don't have as much time as we'd like to organize things and go to stores."

"For whatever you guys need," Owen muttered and laughed.

He pulled on his horse's reins with a jerk that startled his mount a little. The animal whirled to the right and whinnied and startled the horse Carlos was riding, which reared up for a few seconds, long enough to lift its front legs in the air without Carlos expecting it and before he could do anything it threw him to the ground.

"Carlos!" shouted Owen as he saw him fall and roll on the ground.

He caught the other horse, tied them to a tree, and ran to Carlos.

The cop struggles to find his next breath, the landing having knocked the wind out of him and puts his hand to his head.

"Carlos, Carlos, say something."

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E - Eating disorder

Those who know Carlos think that in many ways he is a perfect guy, with no flaws, fears or traumas. But the real Carlos is very different and it has taken him a long time to lock deep in his soul those months struggling with anxiety and an eating disorder that one night, with friends, in the safety of home, the barrier that keeps him away, breaks into pieces and the demons return to him.

That night it only took three comments for Carlos' worst memories to come back to his head, three comments to make him collapse, for the person he had worked so hard to form after that summer of 2011 to break into a thousand pieces.

It was an ordinary Thursday night, a night off for the entire 126 team and for Carlos. It wasn't easy for their schedules to fit in with TK's lately so they wanted to make it a game night to remember.

Carlos had cooked all afternoon, he had the day off for a reason, because of the sprained ankle that had kept him home for a week, and he wanted to enjoy it. TK had polled his friends to find out what games they preferred, what music to play and what drinks to buy.

Nothing could go wrong, least of all when it was the first game night they'd done at the loft. They had called it the opening, although they had already gone to dinner once and had drinks some night before going out dancing.

But game night was sacred.

After three games of Catan, which Mateo managed to win and which made the others not want to play with him anymore, it was time for dinner.

Carlos had prepared canapés, something that could be eaten on the sofa or sitting on the floor. He had made everything, with meat and vegetarian, some fish and finally the sweets.

"Holy cow, Carlos, you've gone all out today, do you want to make us put a couple of kilos on us?" asked Paul and although he managed not to let it show, the comment had caught him off guard and he took a moment to realize he wasn't talking about him.

"Hey, and cooking like this, how do you keep the weight off yourself?" Mateo question did go straight to him, but it was a positive thing, he told himself. He was telling him that he hadn't put on weight, it was a positive comment, but it still made him nervous.

Any comment related to food made his hair stand on end, although in the ten years since then he had learned to control it thanks to a couple of very good psychologists and nutritionists who had helped him.

"Carlos is the best cook in the world," TK said coming back from the kitchen with drinks for everyone and circled his body from behind. "I'm the one who has to worry about not getting fat from what he puts on my plate. With all the exercise he gets, he burns it off fast."

Carlos smiled reached back and stroked TK's head to which his boyfriend responded by giving him a kiss. He adored this man, he was going to marry him when he found a way to ask him to. Though that night certainly wasn't going to be the time.

"Oops, be careful, Carlos, with these days that you're off work because of the sprain, let's see if you're going to put on weight."

He choked on the morsel of meat in his mouth when he heard what Marjan had just said and at which everyone laughed.

To the others it was a joke, to the others it was no problem to talk about food, about getting fat.

He swallowed the morsel as if it were a stone and continued listening to the conversation about the most fattening things, about the many or few calories in the bread that Carlos had used in the meal, as well as the kilos you could gain with meat or fish.

Carlos had never said he was nervous about talking about food but avoided doing so. Only TK had been surprised when they had first started together that he liked cooking so much but not talking about food in general.

"Hey, Carlos, have you ever had any weight problems?" asked Mateo again looking directly at him.

Carlos couldn't hide the look and the only way he found to keep from looking nervous was to clench his hands.

"Ehm, well I guess like everyone else, when you reach adolescence and your body changes."

"I'm sure you were one of those kids with cheeks to pinch," Nancy said rather shockingly. "But hey, look, I was a little overweight when I was sixteen, then my body changed and it stopped being a problem."

"Exactly," Paul replied. "I don't understand those who make fun of overweight kids. If it's a problem they go see a nutritionist, and other times, the kid doesn't feel comfortable with his own body. It's not always about what they eat. How many of you felt comfortable with your body as a teenager?"

"Let's just say my problems at that time were starting to be other problems," TK said, trying to take the heat off the fact that he had already had more than enough to drink by then.

"I never really thought about that," Marjan replied next.

Mateo said more or less the same thing. "What about you, Carlos, were you comfortable with your body as a kid? Although if I had to give my opinion looking at you now, you must have broken a lot of hearts."

"Careful you don't get caught up in the good married life and put on a couple of extra kilos." Marjan's joke was perfectly accepted by everyone except Carlos himself who was about to spit out the French fry he had put in his mouth.

He recognized right away the feeling that was taking over him like a tsunami that comes, sweeps everything away and there is no way to stop it. In his case he could call it a panic attack and he didn't want anyone to see him suffering from it.

Without saying anything, he ran out to the bedroom and for a moment there was silence in the living room, they looked at each other to try to understand what had happened and if anyone had said anything inappropriate.

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D - Ditch

While in pursuit of a suspect, Carlos' car gets stuck in a ditch. He is injured but manages to contact TK, who, as fate would have it, is not far away.

"I am in pursuit of the suspect. He’s driving a 2014 Prius."

"Be careful, Officer Reyes. Suspect is armed and dangerous."

"Copy that. I have him in front of me."

"Keep us updated."

Carlos continued driving without taking his eyes off the vehicle in front of him. He had been chasing him for almost ten minutes, ever since he had been notified that this guy had just robbed a bank with two accomplices.

But he wasn't going to let him get away. He was a good cop and many were expecting that he would soon become a detective. He knew that solving this case and arresting one of the robbers would be of great help to him.

They were driving out of town. The man in the car in front sped up, wanting to lose sight of him, but Carlos wasn't going to let him.

He followed him closely, not losing sight of him as he turned right, then left. When they finally entered a now abandoned old factory complex, they left him behind, just as they were leaving the city behind.

The suspect began to jerk the steering wheel side to side and slowed down a bit, thus risking causing an accident between them, but Carlos saw him coming and pulled over to the side.

He gritted his teeth. He wasn't going to get him off his back, he was going to put that guy in jail. He could be after him all day, he didn't care.

Carlos wondered where the guy was planning to go and when he intended to stop, and then, when they came across a completely straight road, the other man accelerated as much as he could. Carlos did the same; he put the patrol car on full throttle and stuck to the other man's car.

Then he understood, too late. All of this had been planned, from the robbery itself to their escape. That man was just pushing a policeman away, he was taking him where he wanted to go; he wasn't turning around, he wasn't running away.

It was a trap and, the next thing Carlos knew, the man turned the vehicle at the last moment. Carlos was not prepared and, terrified, he found a ditch in front of him, into which the patrol car fell.

*

"Come on, the top isn't far," Cooper said, turning around, hands on hips and looking at TK who was struggling to keep up.

"Are you serious? The top is up there," TK replied, pointing to the mountain, which looked bigger and bigger to him, ahead of them.

When Cooper had proposed they go out trekking in the mountains, in the fresh air, taking advantage of his day off to free his mind, not to think about how bad he felt about the drug issue, TK had accepted without much thought.

He dreamed about it and knew that, since Sadie's attack, things with Carlos had been complicated. Getting some fresh air and taking advantage of one of the few days when Carlos was working and he wasn't to relax would do him good.

However, apparently he and Cooper had a very different idea of what a day outdoors was. Cooper was a lover of walking, he would get excited when his watch told him he had walked another thousand steps. He wanted to get to twenty thousand a day. But it hadn't occurred to him to tell TK.

"Come on, TK, tell me you don't feel free and relaxed out here."

"I feel fine, but I'd like to be able to breathe. I'm not used to these walks, have I ever told you I'm a city boy?"

"A few times, but I assure you that when you come home this afternoon and meet Carlos, everything will be better between you. I hope you'll name your first child Cooper."

TK smacked him on the shoulder and continued walking up the mountain. He smiled as he heard his sponsor burst out laughing.

His phone started ringing and Cooper ran towards him.

"Didn't we agree that you wouldn’t bring your phone?"

"Sorry, but I don't like to be unavailable when Carlos is working."

Cooper nodded, he had long since understood that TK and Carlos were a whole. TK had told him how badly Carlos was having it those days for not knowing how to help him; other times he had told him about his own feelings, the fear he had that Carlos would get tired and leave him.

Seeing that it was precisely Carlos who was calling him made him smile.

"Carlos, babe, can you believe we were just talking about you?"

For a moment he heard nothing on the other end, nothing but heavy breathing and that he was in trouble.

"Carlos, is that you, babe?"

Carlos coughed, he recognized his voice, but he was only coughing and groaning painfully.

"Babe, you're scaring me. Is that you, can you say something?"

"TK."

"Yes, I'm here. What's wrong?"

"It hurts so much."

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