#wildehopps b

[zootopiagush]

That's Not in the Script

Nick: So you and me save the day...

Judy: Uh-huh.

Nick: And then we get together if you know what I mean.

Judy: Uhh.... Sure?

Nick: And then you get pregnant with my baby.

Judy: I don't think that's...

Nick: And then we have a huge politically-charged fight over it and have a messy breakup with physical violence and tears!

Judy: Wait... What!?

Nick: Whoa, whoops, I think some of these pages got stuck together... Ah, here it is. Those last two were about Fru Fru and the Oryx-Antlersons. And they're out of order.

Judy: That's a relief. Can you imagine? Me getting pregnant with your baby?

Nick: Our baby would be cubic and made of cardboard.

Judy: Huh?

Nick: 'Cause if a lion and a tiger makes a liger, a bunny and a fox makes a box.

Judy: [pauses briefly than laughs hysterically]

Nick: [also laughs hysterically]

Chief Bogo: What on earth is so funny?

Judy and Nick: BOXES!

Chief Bogo [deadpan]: Hilarious.

Nick: Any plans for chuffalo? [Eyebrow waggles]

Chief Bogo: I don't know what that is and I don't think I want to.

Judy: They can't get pregnant.

Nick: Neither can you if it's my baby but here we are.

Judy: Touche.

[zootopiagush]

How I like my WildeHopps in order from favorite to least favorite

1. Nick having a huge unrequited crush on Judy while Judy is completely oblivious 2. Judy and Nick being friends for years and only then dating, which may or may not end in marriage 3. Nick and Judy dating for a while and then breaking up amicably after realizing they are better as friends (may or may not be cyclical) 4. Judy and Nick never dating, and eventually going their separate ways, and Judy realizing, too late, that she did actually like Nick that way, making him “the one that got away” 5a. Everyone thinking Nick and Judy are already married soon after the movie because of how wonderful their romance is 5b. Judy and Nick being honest-to-god platonic besties forever 6. Nick and Judy eventually drifting apart and never thinking about each other again 7. Nick, the stereotypical male predator, and Judy, the stereotypical female prey, having an antagonistic “romantic” relationship

[zootopiagush]

I’m not consistent about whether I ship Judy and Nick romantically (more on this next post), yet I still find it unfathomable to ship either of them romantically with anyone else.

[zootopiagush]

Goofy Movie AU where Judy drags Nick to Lester’s Possum Park because she used to love going there with her family.

[zootopiagush]

Now I have nothing against shipping Nick/Judy or Flash/Priscilla (in fact I do ship both of them a little myself) but honestly if you look at the end credits and immediately associate both Nick/Judy and Flash/Priscilla with the Ottertons and the Hoppses, in the sense of “they could be just like them some day”, but completely pass over the equally affectionate/suggestive Bogo/Clawhauser, you MAY be applying a double standard.

[zootopiagush]

Judy attempting to guard either Nick or Clawhauser from danger by standing in front of them and spreading her arms out while glaring at the attacker. Although her friend can tell it’s not very effective, he’s touched by her kind gesture.

Bonus points: So is the attacker.

[zootopiagush]

Judy: Nick, Nick, come here please!

Nick: What is it, Jude?

Judy: I tried a new angelfood cake recipe. Tell me how it is?

Nick: [takes a bite] Hmmm... blech!

Judy: What's wrong?

Nick: This cake is so sweet it makes Clawhauser seem like Chief Bogo.

[zootopiagush]

Skit Request #11

Hopps: If Bogo dies, then I'd be in charge.

Wilde: Um. No. If Bogo dies, then I'd be in charge.

Hopps: No, I mean, imagine Bogo nobly taking a bullet in the line of duty. Would he want a former con artist to be in charge? No. He'd want a good cop.

Wilde: Right, and of course with his dying breath he'd say "bunny I hated as a rookie, be my successor."

Hopps: He likes me now.

Wilde: Look, when Bogo kicks the bucket he won't want some wide-eyed Bunnyburrow hick. He wants someone who knows the streets as well as he does.

Hopps: He's a hardened cop not a hoodlum!

Wilde: Well, at least I never almost got fired on my second day.

Hopps: How. Dare. You. You would be in jail if it wasn't for me!

Wilde: Oh, yeah, well you'd be in carrot farming if it wasn't for me!

Clawhauser: [shrieks and sobs]

[Bogo rushes in suddenly]

Bogo: What's wrong, kitten?

Clawhauser: Hopps and Wilde were fighting and making me think about you dying at the same time...

[Bogo gives Hopps and Wilde a death glare while holding Clawhauser]

Hopps and Wilde: That's for you.

Bogo: It's for both of you.

Wilde: Just out of sheer curiosity, if you did... you know... who would replace you.

Bogo: Trunkaby.

Hopps: Uhh... after her.

Bogo: McHorn.

Wilde: Then...

Bogo: Delgato.

Hopps: Dang.