welcome to humanity
[art by kann]
Dean found Cas sitting on the hood of the Impala, staring up at the stars. It was so reminiscent of the position that he and Sam had adopted countless times in the past, gazing up at the sky, feeling like they might fall in if they didn't have the car and each other to anchor them down. [...] It wasn't quite hopelessness that Dean saw there; it was mourning. An expression only worn by someone who has lost something precious and irreplaceable. “Cas?” Castiel barely seemed to register Dean's voice; he continued staring up at the deep navy sky. “It's so quiet,” he murmured after a moment, so softly that he may as well have been talking to himself. Hell, maybe he was. Maybe he was too lost in himself to realize that Dean was even there at all, but that didn't mean staying would do any harm, would it? “Pretty secluded here,” Dean said. “Not much noise. I kind of like it.” But of course, he knew that wasn't what Cas meant. Cas did not speak or move, simply staring unblinkingly up at the sky. His breath puffed in the cold air before his lips. “I can't hear it,” he finally said, barely in a whisper. “Hear what?” “The Song.” He turned his head, as if searching for something in the endless expanse of stars; his face fell when he didn't find it. “The Host...my brothers and sisters. I can't hear them.” Dean had already figured as much, but hearing the longing in Castiel's voice made it all the more painfully final. His wings had been clipped for good. Cas drew in a shaking breath. “I thought I would be ready,” he said. “It's been slipping away little by little, getting quieter every day...I thought it wouldn't be so bad when it was finally gone, but it's...it's so quiet, Dean.” Finally, Cas turned toward him, eyes wide and searching in the dark. Dean shifted uncomfortably. How was he supposed to provide any sense of comfort in a time like this? How could he? There was nothing he could say or do that would make it alright. But there rarely was in life, so he was used to that feeling. So he didn't say anything. Instead, he sat down on the hood of the Impala next to the ex-angel and put a hand on Cas' arm. Cas looked down at the hand curiously as Dean looked up to the stars himself. It was a clear, cool night; there was not a cloud in the sky. Neither of them said a word.
[from ”Welcome to Humanity” by winnywriter]
