I mean, there is no use denying it anymore, is there? My life is a hot, hot mess and I am barely pulling through. Like, literally, don't ask me how my exams went, how much of my to-do list I've completed, or what I did in the past 9 months, or how I spent my time if I haven't exercised, read, or pursued any hobby. I myself don't have the answer to these questions, all I can muster as a response is a nervous gulp, because, really, what was I doing the past 9 months?
I mean, it is high time that I get my shit together, and basically remodel my entire lifestyle to have my "dream" life or at least whatever's the closest option because I can't exactly move to a pretty city and own an aesthetic flower shop that grows its own flowers, can I? Or at least give it a try because if I'm being honest, I have tried and failed multiple times before.
Therefore, after carefully scouring the internet with embarrassing searches like 'How to glow up?' I have made a decision. One which's impact is unpredictable but I am going to give it a try anyway. I am going to *drumroll* glow up!
The "glow up" is basically just me motivating myself to get out of bed, walk more than 50 steps a day, actually bother to complete my assignments, and study at least enough to not flunk my terms which are in... 18 days, and yes, I am absolutely clueless about them. Depressing, I know.
To be very honest, I had started another challenge some time back — 100 Days of Productivity. I have been extremely inconsistent, and I hope this does not end up in a similar way, I don't want it to be a short-lived burst of energy like I often tend to have, and hence I have decided to record it here. It seems far-fetched and almost impossible but I just want to demolish these periodic burnouts I seem to have.
Anyway, I hope you follow this process of me documenting my path to 'decreased burnouts' and 'increased productivity with as much excitement as I harbor for it. It would encourage me :) Also, I would love to your any and all of your thoughts, do send in an ask or a private message!
First of all, my 'glow up' is going to focus on internal stuff more, but, a part will still be external stuff. For easy navigation, I have made a comprehensive list that basically highlights everything I hope to establish/achieve from this project.
THE GLOW UP PROJECT:-
Internal
Wake up early (5 am)
Exercising (Cycling)
Hydrating myself (I literally never drink water)
Study study study. — Basically, the main reason I started this whole thing. I need to self-study everything that my teachers taught when I skillfully ignored them in the past some time and then study a little more myself.
Learn a new language (Korean) — very long term, but like I said I want this to be more than a random burst of energy
Pursuing two (2) hobbies — I used to play the piano, learn classical dance and play basketball before COVID but now... it is just a blur of tumblr, and instagram, and ao3. I plan to pick up playing the piano again and I would like to learn chess.
Journalling. I don't exactly gratitude journal, just as a form of art, and sometimes I put in poems I write, it is time-consuming but I hope to be able to continue doing it as I have religiously been working on it except in the past 45 days.
Reading. I also recently got out of a reading slump and managed to inhale almost all of Jane Austen's books and am now reading Red White and Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston, this is of course after my term exams.
Writing. I really, really hope I find enough time to write because I have unexpectedly wanting to do it often.
Vision Board/Pin Board. I have a pinboard above my desk and I used to put literally every piece of paper that I touched on it when I was 7, and then I put some notes on over a year ago, but it has been alarmingly empty since then save a torn periodic table and a tissue that I drew on, and I would love to redecorate it to make an aesthetic vision board as well as a space for my important papers. This is a project that I am already looking forward to but I have to space it out because I have exams in 18 days (like 200 marks for each subject exams).
External
Changing my hairstyle (Getting bangs)
Establishing and following a skincare routine
Wear literally anything except the same two (2) pairs of pajamas
Letting my nails grow (I know this seems stupid but I have the bad habit of biting my nails and I am trying to let go of that)
These are basically goals right now and they might change, but I guess this is it right now. I am going to try to post every day with a to-do list and an update, I hope you follow through with these posts! For this series, I am tracking 'the glow-up project'.
Before I start this post, I would just like to say that there is no perfect way to be 'perfect' but for me, unproductivity, burnout, and extreme lack of motivation are some things I have been struggling with a lot for a long time, and this is simply my attempt at solving those issues and implementing some changes in my life which I believe are positive, I am definitely not stating that these are the right decisions for everyone or that this is the only way to be productive.
Feel free to drop me a message, or an ask anytime. You can also tag me in your post!
The past couple of days have been a wild ride to say the least! I finally started physical school after so long of sitting behind a screen and I couldn't be happier or more excited. It is honestly much easier to remain focused in a classroom than it is on my bed lol. And then, barely a week into physical school, I came down with a stomach infection. And I mean this very literally coz I fainted due to dehydration ://
But anyway, I took some time off to recover and am now feeling much better :)
These are just some pics I clicked while studying today. Since I haven't been able to do much the past few day, today, I hope to:
- Study Transport in Plants in Biology
- Write an essay in french
- Write an essay in english
- Study Chemical Bonding in Chemistry
- Watch the recordings of my physics lectures and make notes
- Complete physics assignments (2)
It is a fairly long list but I hope I manage to complete atleast a few tasks~
Today, ofcourse I attended school and then I did a lot of physics! Like a lot... And then some Economics, Biology and Maths. After a little break I wrote a little which made me really happy as I hadn't done it since a really long time! Yayyyy :) I also recieved the 'Inquirer of the Month' award at my school today and I am happy :D
I wouldn't exactly consider today extremely productive but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
it is exam time again! which is weird because it somehow feels like it is always exam time
this time tho i had the good sense to start preparing well in advance so i don't have to pull all nighters again (who am i kidding? i'll probably still do that)
lol anyway... i clicked those ✨ aesthetic ✨ photos in the past week or so
he's gonna say it's love / you never called it what it was / till we were dead and gone and buried / check the pulse and come back swearing
So... I was supposed to wake up at 9 but somehow slept in till 10 30 and then my schedule was totally demolished... but I managed to complete most of what I should have! But I guess I'd still consider this day productive :)
Today I have completed some physics questions, cried over the rest, solved some math papers, contemplated my life choices, read a little, and had a mental breakdown!
Anyway... the photo is of one of my journal spreads that I am quite proud of :)
I know it has been quite some time since I posted but I have been absolutely unmotivated and discouraged...
On another note... I have exams from 1st September which honestly isn't that far away and I have started preparing for it. These are pictures I clicked when I was making my chemistry notes! I think I quite like these :) especially because of the pink aesthetic I was able to capture <3
Yesterday, I finally completed 'Emma by Jane Austen' and it was one hell of an emotional rollercoaster but I loved it! Today I also did some English and Physics, and am gping to study a lot more now :)
This is my study table although today I changed it a little so now it is much bigger and more spacious! Yayyyyy :D
