Pairing: Jeonghan x fem!reader (mentions of Wonwoo)
Synopsis: The foreshadowing in which Uncle Woo will be facing Jeonghan’s wrath.
Genre: Straight up just crack, maybe a tinge of fluff, Nina from 'Wonwoo's Tasty Cereal (And Milk)'
Warnings: Mentions of food, implied that Nina might have a small innocent crush on Wonwoo 😭😵💫
WC: idk . . . I'm on mobile._.
A/N: I have better stories to write, better things to do, but I kind of miss Jeonghan and some of you asked so . . . 😶 I don't actually know what I'm doing rn 😭😂😅 Subjected to being deleted - or maybe there will be a sequel?????
. . .
With a heavy sigh, his shoulders visibly rising and falling with his breath, Jeonghan's smile fell as he watched his pride and joy, the light of his life, his own flesh and blood, chomping down on dry Cocoa Puffs and sipping milk from her green cup - separately. She was humming his "Warm Cup of Milk" song happily, her short legs kicking back and forth on her white painted chair; Nina was actually enjoying this.
The best part of Cocoa Puffs was the chocolate from the cereal that would seep into the milk and you'd get chocolate milk to drink after you finish the cereal. Nina knew that - Jeonghan taught her from when she first had teeth.
Who in the world un-did that?
"What's wrong?" his wife peered at him. He looked as if he saw a ghost.
"I fear," Jeonghan started, pressing his lips into a thin line, "Someone broke our daughter."
"Broke her?"
Jeonghan turned mechanically to face his wife, lifting his arm 90 degrees and pointing at Nina drinking some more milk.
"Who eats cereal like that!?" Jeonghan exclaimed.
His wife peaked over his shoulder, eyes widening at their daughter's new rather peculiar eating habits. Doing what he didn't have the courage to do, she rounded around Jeonghan and approached Nina who greeted her mother with a bright grin.
"Hi mommy!" Nina exclaimed.
"Hi sweetie," she replied, smoothing down her hair, "Whatcha doing?"
"Eating cereal," Nina picked at another puff.
"And who taught you how to eat cereal like that? Your dad always said milk before the cereal."
"Uncle Woo," Nina answered sweetly. "He's the smartest!"
Werre those . . . Hearts popping out of her eyes? At five?
Jeonghan would not allow this blasphemy.
He left his position at the kitchen door, heading up the stairs to his bedroom to grab his phone with the intentions of sending a certain babysitter a very stern text.
And so, that was how the great cereal war between Yoon Jeonghan and Jeon Wonwoo began.
Synopsis: You've been eating cereal wrong your entire life. Wonwoo and your niece are going to fix that.
Genre: Fluff, crack, pseudo-dilf!Wonwoo (ie. "Uncle Woo"), hints of dilf!Jeonghan
Warnings: Mentions of food, they watch Land Before Time, mentions of Wonwoo dressing up as Naruto as a kid (low-key felt like this was more a Jihoon thing, but I left it for humor - please laugh :') )
A/N: Based of off this tweet. For shits and giggles only - I don't really care how Wonwoo eats his cereal lol. Nobody's perfect and whatever makes him happy, I guess 🙄😂 jk jk jk.
Title is a play on Jeonghan's 'Warm Glass of Milk' - yes, despite this being about Wonwoo, Jeonghan still found way to seep into it. I would also like to credit @aceofvernons for helping me build up this trope a while ago . . . Initially, we thought Vernon would be the type to do this, but we were both wrong lol.
It's not my best work since I do not dabble in fluff . . . but I tried! Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy it - this one's especially for you and your weird (affectionate) man's @wisteria-woo💙
“Do not corrupt that little girl when she comes over, okay?” you warned him, arms folded across your chest.
Wonwoo paused in his chewing, the Cheerio in between his thumb and his index finger, holding it just inches away from his chapped lip as he peered at you innocently, through the tops of his black-wired spectacles – or at least he tried. Without the corrective lenses, you were all but a beautiful blur to him.
Your older sister was dropping your niece off in a few hours, while she and her husband, Jeonghan, went for a date night – one that was long overdue. They needed some alone time and you volunteered to babysit. Nina would be spending the night at yours and Wonwoo’s shared apartment as well.
Pushing the piece between his lips, he crunched down on it mechanically, shrugging nonchalantly. “Corrupt her over what?”
You pointed to the glass of milk in his hand and the dry bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios sitting in front of him. “That.”
The right corner of his lip curled up, spreading his lips into a thin, crooked smile. Doing his best to hide his humor from you, his eyes fell from your gaze as he loudly cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose. He choked back a laugh, hiding behind the rim of his glass of milk.
Curse him and his good looks. That stupid shy smile that stretched across his face and puffed up his cheeks, never failed to make your heart flutter despite being annoyed by the way he eats cereal.
Seriously? Who the hell eats cereal and drinks milk separately?
You’ve heard of people who put milk first (which he also did much to your horror as you found out after the first morning you spent over at his old apartment), but this . . . this was another level of strange.
“C’mon,” he let out an exasperated breath, trying to calm himself down. He placed his glass of milk down on the table with a loud ‘clunk.’ “It’s not that bad – Honey Nut Cheerios dry taste good!”
“Then eat it dry! Don’t . . . drink milk on the side with it!” you exclaimed. You pressed your lips into a tight line, fighting the grin that was about to spread from ear-to-ear across your face.
You knew it was a stupid and childish argument – food was food, and he could eat cereal, however he wanted. Nonetheless, it has become an ongoing joke between the two of you for a few years now. You couldn’t let him live it down just yet – he was your boyfriend after all, and what’s a love without a little banter?
Tilting your head towards him, a knowing look on your face, you noted, “Jeonghan will never forgive you if you set Nina up.”
Wonwoo rolled his eyes, tossing another piece into his mouth. He reached for his milk, purposely took a long sip to make a point.
“You are insufferable, Mr. Jeon,” you frowned playfully.
He winked at you teasingly. “When it’s our kids though –”
You blushed profusely, reaching for the nearest towel in the kitchen and tossing at his face to cut him off.
“It’s cereal before the milk!” you called before running out of the kitchen, trying your best to ignore the way your heart pounded against your rib cage, blood rushing through your ears.
Jeon Wonwoo was something else.
The night with Nina went rather well.
Dressed to the nines, your sister and Jeonghan had dropped her off with specific instructions about her nightly routine. Nina was heading on five, able to tolerate a little longer of an evening now. Dinner at 6PM, bath at 7PM, and bedtime was at 830PM. The rest of the evening was yours and Wonwoo’s to spend together.
Not having been around kids for a while, it was all just . . . a little overwhelming for Wonwoo. He was not naturally gifted with the power of being good with kids, that was more your thing, but he didn’t mind them. Nina was fun, a little too energetic for his liking, but fun nonetheless. For some reason, Jeonghan let her come over dressed in a neon green dinosaur onesie and a backpack full of dinosaur figurines and a cartoon called Land Before Time. Wonwoo would find her on all fours, crawling around the apartment every now and then.
He figured, maybe, she was going through a phase – like he did with Naruto when he was nine. He shook off the embarrassing memories of showing up to school in a bright orange jumpsuit and the Leaf Village headband tied around his forehead (upside down too).
Wonwoo had never grown up watching it, but Land Before Time wasn’t that bad of a show – though, Sara, the yellow triceratops, was kind of annoying. Looking over at Nina, it was the innocent curiosity in her eyes every time she saw something she didn't understand, like Littlefoot's parents knocking their necks together or if she could swallow cherries whole like Perry, that made him melt a little. A smile curled on his face unknowingly while he watched her, his insides feeling warm and at ease. He hadn’t seen that look in a while – it was nostalgic.
"Can you stay for a little bit, Uncle Woo?" Nina had asked him wide-eyed when he put her to bed. You had a small cot set up for her in the corner of your shared office. "Daddy always hums a song about warm milk before I go to sleep."
Wonwoo tucked his hands into his pants, letting out a small huff. "Um . . . I'm afraid I don't know any songs about milk, kid."
"That's okay," she kicked her feet underneath her blue blanket. "Can you just stay? Hold my hand?” she wriggled her chubby fingers at him. “Until I sleep?"
She was certainly her dad’s daughter: big, shiny brown eyes with pretty long lashes. She was still innocent, but Wonwoo could feel it in his spine – she was going to be a menace of a trickster before anyone knew it. She could guilt anyone into doing what she wanted – including Wonwoo.
At least, for now.
"Sure," Wonwoo replied, settling on the floor beside her. He let out a soft hum, slipping his large hands into her smaller ones.
“Thank you,” she sang, settling back into her pillow. “Ni-ni, Uncle Woo.”
The corner of his lip twitched into a lopsided smile. He reached over with his free hand, brushing the stray locks away from her cherubic face. His index finger lingered a while on her soft cheek. “Good night, Nina,” he whispered.
Later that night when you came to check on her, your heart swelled at the sight of Wonwoo still by your niece’s side. He had fallen asleep somewhere along the way, his head resting on the ledge of Nina's cot. His glasses were crooked though, threatening to slip and crack on the floor any minute. You took the liberty of taking them off and placing them on his desk. Throwing back one last glance, you let them be. His back would hurt in the morning, but they looked peaceful.
You could get used to this.
. . . .
Or not.
Your feet stuttered to a stop in the hallway, when you heard Wonwoo’s deep laughter bellowing throughout the apartment from the kitchen, Nina’s cute giggle joining his not shortly after.
“Yeah,” you assumed he was talking to your niece, “You just take a piece here,” you heard a crunch, “And then – drink milk from your glass.”
“Uncle Woo! That’s so neat!” Nina exclaimed excitedly.
He nodded and leaned across the table to meet the little girl’s gaze, “It’s nice too because you don’t end up spilling any milk trying to pour it into the bowl.”
“Oohh,” she marveled as if Wonwoo had just said the most genius thing ever, “That’s good! Mommy always scolds me if I splash milk on the counter.”
“Mmhm,” Wonwoo grabbed a handful of cereal.
“And then I have to clean it up!” Nina complained, she wrinkled her nose at the all too painful memory.
“That’s terrible,” Wonwoo gasped.
“Right,” she pouted.
“Jeon Wonwoo,” you revealed yourself from your hiding spot, hands crossed over your chest already.
Hair disheveled, a strand sticking up on the side, he grinned widely, scrunching his nose ever so slightly. “Morning.”
“I told you not to corrupt her!” you scolded.
“I’m not,” he pointed at Nina, “She thinks I’m the coolest person in the entire world.” He nudged Nina gently, “Don’t ya, squirt?”
“Uncle Woo taught me how to eat cereal the right way!” she told you proudly.
“You know,” he faked a disappointed tone, “Auntie Y/N eats cereal wrong – cereal before the milk.”
“Wonwoo,” you warned.
“Oh,” Nina crumpled her lips into a pout. Much too similar to Wonwoo already, she grasped the short plastic cup with both hands and sloppily slurped the white liquid inside. When she placed the cup back down, there was a little milk-stache lining her upper lip. You couldn’t hold back your laughter – Wonwoo likewise. He chuckled, reaching for a napkin to wipe her face.
“Auntie Y/N, you should listen to Uncle Woo more,” Nina berated when he finished, “He’s got some good stuff.”
You were too late – the little girl was whipped.
“Yeah,” he raised his eyebrows teasingly at you, “Don’t I?”
If you can’t beat them, join them, right?
Rolling your eyes, you made your way over, swiping at the cereal and stealing Wonwoo’s milk as you sat down. You caught Wonwoo’s gaze chomping down on the small, hard grain.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he bumped your shoulder with his own, “You love it.”
“No, but I love you, so –”
He pecked you on the cheek chastely. “Glad we could come to a mutual understanding.”
“why are we even doing this,” wonwoo sighed exasperatedly, running his fingers stressfully through his hair. “we’re obviously not getting anywhere.”
you huffed at him, crossing your arms and turning away to ignore the tall male and turn your attention back to your book, trying to distract yourself.
after a few more minutes of prickly, rankle silence between the two of you, wonwoo caved, walking over to you and wrapping his long, lanky arms around your frame. you relaxed and leaned back into his touch, tilting your head upward to look into wonwoo’s dark, brown eyes.
the edges of his lips curled slightly upward as he leaned down to nuzzle his face gently into your shoulder.
kissing him softly on the top of his messy hair, you put your book down beside your mug of lukewarm tea, reciprocating the embrace.
you patted wonwoo’s head, resting your chin on top of his.
finally, you let out a sigh, pushing wonwoo away slightly so the two of you could talk face to face.
wonwoo was slightly surprised and disappointed, but his face hardened at your expression as well, his heart dreading the words that ensued.
“i know you cheated.”
wonwoo shook his head, laughing slightly in disbelief. “y/n, how many times do i have to tell you-”
a rush of anger rose through you as you exploded:
“NO ONE CAN KILL SOMEONE IN MARIO KART FOR 15 ROUNDS IN A ROW, JEON WONWOO.”
pairing: meanie
genre: crack, fluff + uni!au
warning: smoking weed
words: 1300
summary: wonwoo’s baked, but mingyu’s prepared for what comes next.
"Have you never heard of puff puff pass?" Mingyu asks, eyes wide as he gazes over at Wonwoo.
Wonwoo shrugs, looking bored out of his mind, but Mingyu knows that's just his face. "I have. I invented it."
Mingyu laughs, cringing at how shrill he sounds to his own ears, but Wonwoo only smiles like making Mingyu laugh is one of his life accomplishments. Mingyu's ears burn then and he accepts the joint that Wonwoo hands him, taking care to grab hold of the correct end.
He takes a drag, his lungs inhaling the gritty smoke and when Mingyu looks up to pass the joint back, Wonwoo winks at him.
Mingyu chokes, sputtering on the smoke in his lungs, coughing so hard it feels like his throat is being scratched raw. Wonwoo laughs at him as he takes the joint back, running his other hand down Mingyu's back before leaning back into his own seat. Mingyu coughs for what he's worth then thumps a fist on his chest as he settles into his seat again waiting for Wonwoo to take another hit.
Wonwoo takes a long drag and breathes out steadily, his stoic expression giving nothing away. Mingyu takes the joint back with no complaint afterward, tipping his head back on the seat to watch the elder closely.
It's bound to happen, they're almost done with this joint after all and by midway, Wonwoo is usually sprouting nonsense. But Wonwoo is composed right now, his eyes at half-mast with little to no expression sparkling in his usually bright brown orbs.
Mingyu should probably be concerned about it, but considering that he's been taking hits to match Wonwoo's, he can't claim that he's in the right place to worry about anything.
Wonwoo smiles at him like he knows what Mingyu's thinking of and considering how long they've been together ー first as friends and then as lovers ー it's not far of a stretch for Mingyu to think of Wonwoo as psychic on top of everything else that he already is. Mingyu tries for a smile back and takes another drag, breaking off with a cough that makes Wonwoo's laughter ring in his ears.
With school and work in their busy schedules, they never really get free time to themselves, not like they used to have anyway. But Mingyu isn't complaining because at least they still have this, these hotbox sessions where Wonwoo will light up a joint and Mingyu will seal up all of his windows until they're done.
Wonwoo takes the joint back and soon enough, Mingyu's lost in their little game of back-and-forth. The joint is reduced to a simple roach that Wonwoo glances at before putting it out in the pot of water he set out earlier. Mingyu is completely relaxed in his seat now, body feeling weightless as Wonwoo smiles peacefully at him.
Because it is peaceful. There are no worries or problems for Mingyu to focus on right now. He's caught up with all his assignments, studied more than enough for that art theory exam he has in two days and he even managed to snag lunch between classes today. It's been a good day and having Wonwoo here with him as they let the weed work its calming magic makes the comfortable feeling in Mingyu's chest expand.
"We should open up a puppy shop," Wonwoo says out of nowhere then and Mingyu almost smiles to himself.
There it is, he thinks to himself before he props his head up on his hand and smiles at the elder. "A puppy shop? Don't you mean a pet shop?"
"I said what I said. No cats allowed in our puppy shop, which means no Junhuis allowed either," Wonwoo shakes his head, his hair flopping into his face and it's only then that Mingyu realizes just how high the elder really is.
"Oh my god," Mingyu laughs, wanting to hunch over, but instead slumps even further into his seat as Wonwoo stares at him. "You're baked."
Wonwoo smiles that wide and teeth-baring smile of his that steals Mingyu's very breath away each and every time and Mingyu finds that he's a goner for this man. "Like a cake."
Mingyu laughs again, his senses slowly beginning to take notice of the situation, but he ignores it and looks back at Wonwoo only to find the elder already staring right at him. "So, a puppy shop? What kind of breeds will we have?"
"All kinds," Wonwoo gushes. "One of each breed, preferably. You can even go stand in front of our shop dressed as a puppy and help get customers. We'd make a lot of money if you did."
"Oh, yeah?" Mingyu asks with one brow raised.
Wonwoo nods, smiling to himself then falling into a fit of giggles. "Yeah. You make a cute puppy. You already look like one half the time anyway."
Mingyu pouts at that, toying with his prominent canines with the tip of his tongue inside his mouth. "Are you calling me a dog?"
"No," Wonwoo shakes his head, his hair flopping into his eyes this time when he finally settles. "You're a puppy. You're too cute to be a full-grown dog, even with your freakishly tall height."
"Well thanks, I didn't know today was 'Let's Pick on All of Mingyu's Insecurities Day'. Let me just get the dalmatian costume Jeonghan forced me to wear last Halloween and you can parade me around for all to see!" Mingyu erupts, his abrupt anger coming from somewhere that is beyond him.
Wonwoo laughs and slides off his chair, crawling across the tiny patch of carpet until he's at eye-level with Mingyu's knees. He presses his nose to Mingyu's calves then curls his hands until they resemble paws, getting onto his knees in front of the younger man. "Ruff ruff, bitch."
Mingyu can't help it. He laughs, eyes crinkling up with the force of it and Wonwoo smiles at him, glad that he was able to diffuse that bomb quickly. "I'll be the puppy then. You handle all the customers and our merchandise and construct the business plan we'll need to get a loan from the bank to open up our shop."
"Wait, you're serious?" Mingyu asks with shock written plainly across his face.
"Of course I am. Jeon Wonwoo constructs no puppy shops he can't achieve. Now would you prefer being the cute model or the businessman with eye bags deeper than your voice?" Wonwoo lifts his nose up in the air, his hands falling to rest by his sides, but Mingyu still wants to laugh at how this all managed to develop.
"Yeah. Alright, I'll be the model. But why don't you show me how cute of a puppy you are," Mingyu chuckles, making sure to wink at the end of his statement and laughing again when Wonwoo flushes a bright red by his knee.
"Is this another one of your kinks? Pet play?" Wonwoo asks, steepling his fingers together over Mingyu's thigh.
Mingyu merely shrugs, not quite sure himself. "Maybe."
"Interesting," Wonwoo hums, letting his hands lie flat against Mingyu's thighs then.
Mingyu's breath hitches, his heartbeat picking up and pounding in his ears. Wonwoo leans forward, his mouth a few mere inches away from Mingyu's crotch when Mingyu's stomach lets out a noise similar to a whale's mating call.
Wonwoo falls back on his ass with the force of his laughter and Mingyu curls into himself on the chair, pouting at his unfortunate urge of the munchies to strike so soon. But Wonwoo doesn't hold it over his head for long and forty minutes later, when they're done eating the pizza Wonwoo ordered, Mingyu has a lapful of a panting Wonwoo to attend to, leaving him with little to no room left for any conversation.
a/n: meanie get high and that’s basically all that went on *finger guns*
