#worst board

[theysaywhatasadsight]

I fuckinf hate cbse and I hate studying I never hated studying sm in icse man fuck this syllabus

Cbse really wrings out all the love you have for learning i swear

[worstboard-blog]

From moot himself:

I've never met someone from /soc/. Actually, I got milkshakes with 3 dudes, but that's it. The board should have been named "Camwhore" but I didn't want a board named that. Stop ignoring every single announcement and rule I've ever made for the board.

Okay, guys, that's pretty much it.

I'm closing Worst Board.

Love you all and see you guys somewhere else, —Ed

[worstboard-blog]

Worst of 2011: Retrospective by moot

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW! 4chan overlord moot offers his 2011 retrospective of 4chan and the Social board to Worst Board editor Ed for the final story in the Worst of 2011 retrospective series. While brief, it's full of insight you couldn't get from anyone else other than our mootykins. Worth noting: moot admits that /soc/ really is the worst board on the internet, thus entirely ending any need for this blog to exist. (Goodnight, sweet prince.)

Why did you start /soc/?

/soc/ was created to remove camwhore, hookup, and "report in" type threads from /b/.

Is there anything you've noticed about /soc/?

They sure love chubbies.

How about any personal anecdotes or experiences from being on /soc/?

I haven't spent much time on /soc/ this year, and we didn't do a Barcade meetup like last year, so there isn't much to say here. I'm somewhat surprised and disappointed by the lack of New Yorkers on the board, since every now and then I get bored and feel like meeting up with a random 4channer but alas it never comes to pass. Milksharks, etc.

Of the new boards you introduced this year, are there any you're particularly proud of?

/diy/ is pretty great, IMO.

Lastly, would you consider the removal of tripcodes on /soc/ a success or a failure?

I wouldn't call it a success, but I wouldn't call it a failure either.

[worstboard-blog]

Worst of 2011: Invention

TRIPFAG/NAMEFAG ROULETTE

I was going to write a decently-long piece analyzing and accusing all namefags of being attention whores (#13 included) but then my rabbit had to die and my travel plans next year had to change and my job had to get a lot less certain and my money had to run out on me and my best friend had to molest me so I decided to just say, fuck it, I'm not really interested in being anything other than the saddest boy in the world today. Normal programming to resume shortly. Goodnight, /soc/ — goodnight, Tumblr.

Love, your editor Parhelion

P.S. send hugs or nudes to [email protected]

[worstboard-blog]

Worst of 2011: Retrospective by Couchgirl

Couchgirl, who's also here on Tumblr, gives Worst Board an exclusive retrospective about life in the Autonomous Principality of Chubby. It's all soppy and stuff, you should probably skip the significant other bits because everybody knows the only guys on 4chan are betas or cock-posters. Once you're done, give her Tumblr a read because she has the exact sort of talent that I'm looking for for an illustrator for a book I'm doing. /hint

This year, I started my career as a chubby thread camwhore on /soc/. I am still unsure as to my motivations, it probably has a lot to do with my deep-seated daddy issues. It began as something titilating and almost thrilling. Then it became a social exercise; I talked to anons and fellow camwhores, I fed many trolls. Fun was had all around. I recieved all the attention one would expect to recieve doing such a thing, but it's what I didn't expect that really blew out me out of the water.

This year, on /soc/, I befriended people I would have otherwise never met. No. 9 From the chubby threads being one of the more notable ones. A bunch of the other girls I'm quite close with. 

But most signifigantly, this year on /soc/ I met my signifigant other. I know, I know, It's like some kind of sick twisted 21st century drug store romance novel gone wrong. If you had asked me one year ago if I would put myself in the position I am today, I probably would have very obnoxiously scoffed at the idea. 

We're moving in together in a few months, as soon as I have enough cash to haul ass across the country. Call me crazy, call me straight up stupid. Although I'm inclined to agree with you on both counts, but I am totally in love and what you say doesn't matter. Nerny-nerny-boo-boo. Take that realists.

So that's what I did this year on /soc/.

Couchgirl's retrospective is the penultimate one in the series of retrospectives: the final 2011 Worst Board retrospective goes live tomorrow. (We still also have the Worst Invention and Worst Board awards to give out, too.) Read the previous retrospectives:

No9

Sleepless/Southampton

Schaka

Puddems

Elton

Mfw

[worstboard-blog]

Worst of 2011: Retrospective by Elton

Worst Board’s Ed cornered notorious Internet diva and pro-virginity activist Elton at a Christmas party, precariously positioned near some mistletoe. Neither one of them acknowledged the kissy-face plant.

Hey Elton, hey.

Hey dude sup

Tell us about the magical e-friendships you’ve made this year.

They weren’t magical THEY MADE ME MISERABLE

Oh good. Keep going.

what is this for? I don’t want to be quoted

But the tape recorder’s already running.

omg ;_;  

[worstboard-blog]

A/S/L??? — Fuckin' Hipster Kids

Ideal mate threads are a haven for what I cherish. Young, nubile girls who enjoy kinky shit and posting all about themselves. What's not to love? Oh, right. I forgot: Hipster images.

Now, I may be at the edge of middle age. Some people (children) would say that I'm past middle age. So, sometimes I don't quite get all the hoopla over the crap you kids talk about. I may be a pretty hip guy that all the girls love but I'm certainly no damned hipster. Hipsters are the scum of the Earth. Me? I'm salt of the Earth. I'm honest and hard working. I don't just go to some random generator to make some young-looking guy who all the young ladies want.

No, I'm the sort of guy who puts effort into getting nudes. I make a grey-haired, balding image of a man in MS Paint, slap it together with a description of my bondage fetish and my need for girls in the fifteen to twenty-five age range then call it a day. That's just the kind of guy I am. Kids these days have no work ethic in them and it's really disappointing.

"Hurrdurr I'm Davis I hate hipsters but I'd love to cam with hipster girls" — shooped with love by Ashley

After all, I put so much time into these dinky little threads that I deserve some compensation. All these kids are hip and young, thinking they're cool cats. I lived through the 80's, man. A time of fast cars, pink suits, the dying of disco and a love for old men. I know what's cool. These kids aren't it.

The irony of the hipster images is that all the children use them. They all claim to be "nerdy" and have interest in bands with names like "The Rat That Got Hit by Lawnmower" or some bizarre shit like that. They're all the same, boring people using the same, boring image. None of them have any individuality. None of them have any substance to them other than being a hipster. Despite trying to be different, they all end up being the same.

I may be old and aging but at least I'm one cool old guy. Now, who wants to send me some nudes?

— D. Donald Davis writes for the Worst Board Sex (Crimes) Desk, dedicating his days and nights to finding fresh new... content... to write about. Current number of restraining orders against Worst Board, Inc., thanks to Davis' rowdy antics: 11.

[worstboard-blog]

Introducing Worst Board's Internet Superheroes: Endrew

Preface by the editor Worst Board, Inc., is a serious business with serious visions and missions and more. We're dedicated to exposing faggotry and uprooting whoreyness. We're pledged to raising awareness to the 4chan Foundation for Cancer. We're the heralds leading the way to make /soc/ great.

Naturally, this sort of mission-critical responsibility means I can't do it alone. So, by trolling contact threads, ideal partner threads, fat threads, footfag threads, small dick threads, average dick threads, cuckold threads, open shirt threads and molestation story threads, I've had the privilege of assembling the world's greatest team to build Worst Board with me.

In the past I've generally hired interns by the dozen and fired them based on reasons such as their inability to speak Australian-accented english at will, or their inability to run across town to get coffee from my favorite hipster cafe in less than twenty minutes, or their need to ask repetitive questions like "What do you mean you want me to write a 1,500 word feature story on Castiel's pussy? How am I supposed to do that?"

All that's changed. As part of my parole agreement I've decided to cut down on unnecessary expenditures, like extraneous interns. I'm left with seven, and I think they're all highly qualified young men and women. Except the balding old guy in the sweatsuit over there. He's… well, I'll introduce him in a bit, okay?

Introduction posts are queued twice daily.

—Ed.

Endrew

Once upon a time there was a girl who posted on /soc/, and everybody was mean to her. They called her a bitch, a whore, a slut, a skank, a slag, a tart, a harlot, a wanton tramp, even a good-for-nothing dishwasher. But one guy stood by her. That one guy was Endrew (not Andrew, you fag.) Endrew took up his shield, his sword and his helmet, all gleaming as if polished by a hundred uncut penises.

Endrew hates namefags. It's hard to blame him for that; namefags are scum. He stays clear of the crush threads and the rate me threads and any sort of circlejerk where namefags fellate each other, but he can't help but wish he were part of it. Why? All the girls seem to drop their panties at the sight of a namefag. Fucking namefags.

He's the guy who's slinging insults to other guys who were calling out the girls he likes for making duckfaces or taking shitty Myspace angle shots. He'd defend anybody on the Internet to the ends of the earth like a loyal dog, as long as they've posted timestamp. He's constantly vigilant, a lighthouse against the darkness of our hearts. Endrew's middle name is Butthurt, and by God did he earn that name well.

For Worst Board, Endrew's assisting Ashley with the News Desk and Davis with the Sex Desk. His column, "Internet Tough Guy", will focus on helpful informative posts on how to pick fights online.

You can contact Endrew by writing to [email protected], or adding him on AIM at worstbored. If you're inclined to send abuse his way, Endrew says, "Say that to my face fucker not online see what happens then."