#wowdad

[purfxctx]

cawk sacker

[greenwithnoe]

DAD: *sees a sports anchor* That guy doesn’t use hair gel

ME: Dad, he’s bald

[coffee-aesthetix]

So my mom is cleaning out my dads desk, and she finds a bunch of receipts, we now know that he spend $315 PLUS dollars on eye cream, salt scrub, and a bunch of other stuff at a MALL KIOSK. As a side note, we thought he might have bought this stuff for Christmas presents for my mom, or our grandma.... NOPE, ITS ALL FOR HIM😂😂😂

[goreidabook187-blog]

Really all I want is

cute forehead kisses, someone to watch Criminal Minds with, and someone that will tolerate (and possibly even share) my annoying obsession with Broadway. 

[pindroplieheard]

My dear father...

And after drafting his fantasy football picks, my dad races to  the basement his man cave, to play COD before total withdrawal symptoms start up. 

The shakes man... only curable by snipe to the face. 

To someone else's face that is.