#writewip

[jennaflare]

shooooould be studying but maybe writing vampire kant game to relax is actually a better use of my time?

[jennaflare]

wip whenever!

tagged by @skeletonsonmars

I don't have a ton of progress on much stuff due to [waves my hand at my looming graduation] but here's a recent chunk from vampray (because of course that's what i choose to work on with my limited time...)

no-pressure tags for @heaumeaux @dick-hardboiled @peanutbutterangelic @squidinkblot annnnd uh idk im tired thats who ive got

He sips tea on Nick's balcony and doesn't hear the first couple of times that Nick calls his name. When he finally looks over, surprised, it's to meet Nick's worried eyes.

"What's up with you?" he asks. "Your stalker again?"

"No," Sand answers, setting his drink down by his feet. "I've been having really bad dreams."

"That's it? Really?" Nick laughs, and normally Sand would laugh, too. It seems silly to be this upset and distracted over some random bullshit his brain generated in the night. But his dreams have never quite been like this.

"I had one where every time I took a step, a sliver of me would peel off. And I didn't want to keep walking, but I was trying to… find something? I think? So I kept moving, until there wasn't anything left of me to move. But I still felt like I was wandering. Still losing parts of myself."

Nick blinks at him, the humor gone from his face. A line forms between his brows. "Are you sure you're okay? With the security cameras, seeing Ray again, and then ghosting everyone… Seriously. What's been going on with you?"

Sand sucks his cheek between his teeth, gently worrying the flesh. He could tell him about Ray. Tell him that he's back, and a vampire, and that he's watched Ray kill people and maybe the dreams are related to that. Who is Ray killing? Sand doesn't know. Doesn't ask.

He tries to. He tries to wrap his tongue, his lips, around the words, but they don't even twitch. The signal to move never reaches them, and he sits there silently meeting Nick's gaze. Eventually, he brings himself to say, "I don't know. I'll—I'll talk to my therapist about it. Okay?"

Nick's frown says that he doesn't believe him. "You promise?"

"I promise."

[jennaflare]

@fadelgender LMAO why yes sweet does appear in one of my videos... and the other words are in some fic! From vampray pt 3:

"Wait, wait, stop," Ray gasps, his hands landing firmly on Sand's shoulders. Then, panicky, "Sand." Sand considers, only for a moment, and it's less of a consideration and more of a—a thought: so Ray gets a choice?

And from the FadelKant follow-up:

"Style said you were noisy in bed," Kant remarks against Fadel's chest. He slides a hand up from his waist to cup his chest, gives it a firm squeeze that has Fadel melting into him.

And a little bodyguard preview for youuuuu:

[jennaflare]

started writing shasha time loop fic and im sorry (tw suicide)

The first time that Shasha meets Gorya is in her very first life.

She doesn't yet understand that this is her first life; as far as she's aware, this is her only life. People live, and then they die, and they are reincarnated into something new.

She encounters her on set, watches the way that she refuses to let some asshole bigshot photographer talk down to her. This tiny slip of a woman, a nobody in the business, and she doesn't give a shit. She walks right out. It's beautiful. She's beautiful.

It's a long time before they see one another again, and Shasha falls hard and fast. And she fucks it up. She fucks it up and loses her. She fucks it up like she fucks everything up.

Her whole life is lived for other people. For her mother, for Woonsen, for her fans. At 31, she jumps off the roof of her building.

Her second life is a mess of chaos, confusion, and constant hospitalization to treat her "delusions" of having lived this exact life before. It ends much like her first, but this time at 16.

In her third life, she accepts that this is reality: when she dies, she comes back as the same exact person. She dedicates her life to religion. She must have some kind of fucked up karma to be stuck in this broken loop of reincarnation.

[jennaflare]

tagged by @hockeyfinches ! thank you, this is so fun! no-pressure tags for @dick-hardboiled @hurlumerlu @heaumeaux @akkpipitphattana @fadelgender. Your word is BREAK, if you'd like to play!

S - Sand bolts across the street without checking for traffic and then he's right there in front of Ray, taking him by the shoulders with an expression of absolute incredulity. His eyes search over him, flooding with tears, hands squeezing his shoulders with bruising force. With a choked sound, he yanks Ray into his arms and buries his face in his neck.

"Ray," he weeps, tears steadily soaking Ray's shoulder. "Ray, Ray, Ray, Ray….."

Ray stares out over Sand's shoulder, lips parted and hands rigid at his sides.

C - Confusion fills Sand's eyes, the inner corners of his eyebrows lifting. "What do you mean?"

"I think he—" Ray laughs one humorless breath and makes himself plow through and just say it. "I think he killed me. I don't know how long I was trapped there. Everything was so confusing after the change and I… I wanted so badly to go home, but I couldn't find it and I was so hungry all the time and…"

"Killed you? Ray, what do you mean he—"

E - Everything is exactly as it had been prior to his disappearance. The same pictures on the walls, the same couch and rug, all the lamps in the same spots. It's eerie how the place has been seemingly frozen in time.

"It looks the same," he says.

N - Naked, he pauses before getting into the shower, his fingers tracing out the pair of wounds on his left thigh. They're long and deep, but they don't bleed, the clearly visible muscle a reminder that everyone is just meat beneath the skin. With his index and middle finger, Ray gently presses into one of the long gashes, spreading it open. It doesn't hurt, though he can feel a pull in the muscle and skin. He peers into the opening and spots a flash of white. Bone. His fingers jerk away as a sudden phantom pain slashes across his thigh, animalistic fear sluicing through him and—

T - They haven’t fucked since Ray came back to Bangkok. They should now, he reasons. It would help. Maybe they’ll both calm down and be able to better see one another’s side in the post-orgasm clarity. So he kisses Sand back. They've kissed a handful of times since the one they shared in the alley, but never so passionately. Sand licks up along the inside of Ray's upper lip, and need sparks along Ray's skin, his dick twitching in his pants. But then Sand's tongue pushes further into his mouth, and the last time Ray had a tongue in his mouth it had been one that he bit off but it was a monster's so it grew back and he stopped fighting the inevitable because—

Ray shoves Sand away. They both stand there for a moment, Sand breathing hard and Ray not breathing at all.

[jennaflare]

an evolution of first lines

I thought it'd be neat to compile first lines of my posted fics (and some current wips) to see how my writing has evolved. oldest fic here is from when I was still in high school?? so yeah a lot of improvement over the years here.

2012 There was an annoying, inconsistent tapping noise coming from Zatanna’s window.

2016 Yuri realized how much he missed Otabek when they spotted each other in the airport.

2018 Kotetsu had been meaning to come out to Barnaby for a while, and it was just his luck that Barnaby beat him to the punch.

This was it, Mike thought.

“We have successfully landed here in lovely San Francisco, California. Local time is 12:36 P.M. and it’s a crisp fifty-seven degrees out.”

2020 David (23:44): hey, it's David from last night

Jiang Cheng regretted ever agreeing to a blind date.

Nie Huaisang sat in the light of a single flickering candle, watching the flame dance with empty, tired eyes.

“I think someone has been following me,” Xiao Xingchen says, peering through the blinds at the car that sits parked across the street.

The stars twinkle sedately as a Kona Blue 2012 Ford Focus rolls into an empty gravel parking lot, its tires crunching as it turns into a parking spot.

Up in the mountain paths only accessible through the Unclean Realm, a spring fills a small basin in the stone, spilling with myriad plants and mosses.

While ensnared in his decade-long revenge plot, Nie Huaisang did his best to envision as many possible outcomes as he could.

Wei Wuxian (11:06): so im gonna see u tonight, right

In the summer after Nie Huaisang’s sixth birthday, in the close, sticky press of a hot afternoon spent on dusty training fields, the small boy breaks his hand.

2021 When Lotus Pier is rebuilt, it is rebuilt entirely anew.

“Woah,” Nie Huaisang says when he opens his door. “You look like shit.”

Francis was seated in his armchair beside the fireplace the first time he heard it.

“... Now if you will all give a warm welcome to the director of the upcoming thriller More Glass Than Velvet, Nie Huaisang!”

Heavy rain clouds hang low and smothering over Lotus Pier, emptying their contents into swollen rivers.

The temple that sags into the pock-marked mountain face seems, at first look, abandoned.

2022 Nie Huaisang yawns so big that his jaw cracks, almost painfully.

2025 Someone has been following Sand.

Ray wakes up on the morning of August the sixteenth to find Sand still in bed beside him.

2026 The only reason Style is still alive is because Fadel isn't getting paid to kill him.

Red and blue strobe over Ray's eyelids in a disconcerting blur that instantly makes his stomach lurch.

Maybe it's weird to say, but Akk loves visiting burn sites.

Fadel has a new tattoo.

Ray comes to buried in earth.

WIPS He shouldn't be here, Boston thinks, a drink held tightly in hand.

The first time that Shasha meets Gorya is in her very first life.

Sand wakes like a drowning man breaking through to air.

Rex opens the door to his room to find Vace sitting on his couch, relaxed as anything like he’s meant to be there.

3 AM finds Ryan and Min-Gi huddled shoulder-to-shoulder in a bathtub at a post-show party, a joint and quiet laughter passing between them.

April 3rd, 2007: the day of Ash Lynx’s release from prison.

Yuuri Katsuki discovered his favorite book series, The Fate of Stone, when he was 17.

[jennaflare]

any of the thk vids you're working on for the ask game! or alternatively the thk fic 👀

posted a preview for I'm a believer, infinite skin has very little done, so you get: Magnified! this one was supposed to be a sister video to my fadelstyle touch video in terms of like... vibe or whatever but progress has been so so so slow. really need to get back to it

as for the fic. i have not written much and I'm not totally happy with it but heeere's a snippet

"Would you ever let me fuck you?" Style asks.

Fadel huffs a tiny laugh through his nose, just barely cracking a smile. "Sure, why not."

He can hear the grin in Style's voice when he says, "Really?"

Fadel opens his eyes and squints bemusedly at Style. After a moment, he asks, "Are you serious?"

"Of course I am. Are you not?"

He blinks at him a few times, unsure of how to proceed. "I thought you liked how we have sex."

"Oh, I absolutely do. Zero complaints from me."

"Then why…"

Style pops himself up on one elbow so he's looking down at Fadel. "I think it'd be hot," he says, snapping the t on the English word.

[jennaflare]

Trying agaaaain for words in WIPs:

Cat, table, mug, window, water

we have some winners with table, window, and water! thanks dear lmao

Watching him isn't enough. He starts stealing things from Sand. Little things that won't be missed. A guitar pick that Ray stores safely in his breast pocket, next to his miraculously still-beating heart. A pack of cigarettes which he smokes slowly over the course of a week. Sand's phone, once, in an ill-advised moment of complete irrationality. Sand still has the same code on his phone and Ray spends an hour combing through his texts, pictures, email, social media—anything and everything. There are a few names in his recent texts that Ray doesn't recognize, and he scrutinizes these conversations for any hint of flirtation, jealousy curling through him. But when he comes back to himself (he seems to drift away so easily), he realizes how stupid this is and he leaves the phone on a random table by the bar.

Ray sits outside the hostel he'd started with his friends like a specter, watching Mew through a window. He works with the same focus that he always used to, eyes rarely lifting from his laptop as he types away. In university, Ray could pass hours just watching Mew focus on a project. He gets a small furrow in his brow sometimes, and Ray would fantasize about smoothing the skin with his thumb and pressing a kiss to his cheek. Telling him not to worry about it so much. You don't want to get wrinkles.

"It's okay," Sand says, and Ray accepts this and lies back down. The ocean slowly laps over their shins, then their stomachs, until they're underwater. They drown peacefully together.