#wsom

[hellgram]

why don't you tongue fuck the throat wound and then maybe you'll calm down

[ronsenboobi]

had this realization abt wsom yesterday. feeling very normal about it all as per usual

[ronsenboobi]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

wayward sons of man (ffxiv)

wol-centric, wol/zenos

6 chapters, 11k words (ONGOING)

! post-endwalker (spoilers up to 6.0), canon divergence

on death, the demands of fate, and ineluctable intimacy.

“Tell me, then,” Zenos said. “What is the foremost quality of a hunter, if not ferocity to match that of his prey?”

“Patience,” Sairsel replied stiffly. Oh, at least he could muster up some condescension, if not a real rejoinder to separate the righteousness of his killings from Zenos’s. It would’ve been pale reassurance, anyroad; death was death.

“I waited for you,” Zenos pointed out, almost like a confession.

[ronsenboobi]

the closeted zenos experience and by extension my experience of his relationship with my fake little guy is soooo fun because it's like What if another man touched you in a way that wasn't violent. what if you let him. and sel could be that person because he knows how to touch and let himself be touched with healthy desire and affection and intimacy BUT the only way he can bear to touch zenos is thru violence. and he can't accept that in himself he can't accept his own violence but he also cannot accept any other way to touch z and z doesn't know how to be touched in any other way and the snake bites its own tail over and over and it never ends because it never started in the first place and they are killing each other and dying side by side in space NOT touching !!!

[ronsenboobi]

wait another tweet of mine that i need to archive For The Tags

oh maybe i have a Thought (singular) forming about zenos and the inevitability of the narrative. even when he gives us a way out, he is cognizant of the fact that the outcome isn't really up to us, nor him. he knows he's in a story and it isn't his.

re his 'i accept you' dialogue response:

(i would add that endwalker hearkened back to this a little bit by having him give wol a way out of fighting him one last time - and the fight happens regardless of wol's answer because they are trapped in a narrative! together!)

and a variation on a theme from my bestie pathologic bot:

Any play, performance, or game is a cage because it's played by the rules written by someone else. How can a heartless man escape such a cage? That is the question. And we are yet to find the answer. Who knows—perhaps you'll be of help in this matter.

[hellgram]

no one talks about this but the fact is that sairsel's love for sihtric is so immense that it houses almost the entirety of his self-denied capacity for extreme violence. he's a tree hugging peace loving hippie at heart and only incidentally went to war mostly for his (much more fluent in the language of violence and aggression) mother in his xiv iteration which is why i've always been at odds with latching zenos onto him as a foil (which in turn translates into his revulsion-attraction contradictions re zenos within the narrative) but as a hunter and wild man whose echo is essentially a version of the wit from ROTE he's also a bit animalistic in his instincts that translate into fierce territorial aggression and offspring protection, all heightened through the lens of human emotion WHICH IS TO SAY. he was in fact extremely vulnerable to zenos manipulating him into unleashing the worst of himself. his rage for ala mhigo (territorial aggression) gave zenos a good fight but it genuinely is nothing compared to how utterly nuclear sairsel could have gone if zenos had caused even just SOME harm to sihtric. so in from the cold could have been much much much worse and the main reason it wasn't in my canon (besides that i am letting game canon stop me) is zenos didn't understand sihtric was the key to getting everything he thought wanted until he actually met and talked to him in sharlayan and he'd had his little royal menagerie introspection character development by then

[hellgram]

i think zenos would be weird about it if he found out that pavane definitely licked sairsel's palm scars sexually at some point. don't know if you could call it jealousy but it would be something. it's about the whole matching self-inflicted hand mutilation feeling like a Mirror thing to him and being haunted by the gay sex he doesn't realize he wishes they were having and the semi-conscious realization of someone having a level of emotional and physical intimacy with sel that he doesn't have. i think he would have another loading screen moment about it like when alisaie roasted him and it would not be pleasant. but anyway yeah pavane licking sairsel's palm scars sexually send tweet

[hellgram]

wsom chapter sketch from last month; see also: normal wet dream from a normal guy