Laird "Rattles" Ingellvar: a Minor Rook Masterpost
I was tagged by @starfleetteddybear to make one of these. Unfortunately I am computer illiterate as fuck but finally got around to it!
This feels like a good time to add some additional details I could not fit on there!
But a little disclaimer first...
No you cannot have his sliders. Idc if sharing Rooks is common this precious dingbat is not up for grabs.
Do not just borrow or use any pics or art I have of him willy nilly. I trust a handful of people with his content. If you are one of them, you will know who you are. If I catch stolen or AI junk we're gonna have problems.
We good? Great. Now let's talk Laird!
First things first: Who does he romance? EMMRICH!
They have 3 songs I put to their vibe no I will not explain you will have to listen to them to get it. XD
Grave Gold: Laird in all has 20-22 pieces of grave gold (largely depends on how much effort I feel like putting in lmao). The most common you'll see are the 3 helix hoops on each ear, a braided torc capped by skulls, and a sapphire ring on his left middle finger. Others include a mid tri-section cuff on his right arm, a pair of braided bracelets matching his torc, miscellaneous gold bands on his thumb, middle, and pinky fingers, a small bull ring (septum piercing), a hand chain on his right hand, an anklet with a labradorite center, and- though VERY little known- a tongue piercing!
Foodie: Laird is a fairly decent cook! He has a recipe for strawberry waffles, pumpkin/squash soup, grilled leeks, black garlic ravioli, potato bread, fried "chicken" sandwich made with Enoki mushrooms, and his specialty: kimchi! (which should have also been listed as a fav but I was struggling lol)
Personality: The Laird you get LARGELY depends on your relationship to him. Regardless, however, one thing remains consistent: the amount of personality packed into a single man is overwhelming. Enemies get a rage demon with a bushy beard. He'll have little to say, but you will absolutely hear him (and you'll feel it after via a summoned Tempest). Strangers will meet either a very awkward, glib, unserious young necromancer or a direct, soft spoken, Mortalitasi scholar. It depends on what the occasion calls for. But his closest friends will receive a deep well of vulnerability laced with existential rambling and enough smartass remarks to catch even Isabella off guard. Laird can be unsettlingly upbeat in the face of demise. But he's doing it for himself more than his friends. He suffers from Thanataphobia just as terrible if not moreso than Emmrich's, and if he doesn't laugh through the fear, he completely shuts down verbally and mentally. He is prone to going Non-verbal, even when everything is fine. This embarrasses him terribly. So far, only Neve, Myrna, and Emmrich know the secret to bringing him out of these episodes.
Magic: Laird is a tank of a mage, and not one anyone should be on the wrong end of. He has a basic grasp of most elemental fields, and can raise the dead about as well as Emmrich, but his proficiencies lie in entropic necromancy and electricity... and just a touch of self regulated blood magic. He inherited The Bargain from Vorgoth, with the understanding his Thanataphobia would balance out his anger issues on the battlefield. And boy were they right. Many assume a short, portly mage to be little threat. They do not get to make that mistake twice, where he often mage-steps into the path and casts Soul Burn, Blizzard, or Tempest before most opposition even knows he's there. But if you've hurt someone he loves, he wants you to see him coming. That, objectively is worse.
Features: Laird is particular about his hygiene and how he presents himself. He's tatted from head to toe, with his most prominent being the pitch black ink over the skeletal scars born of his path as a mortician. The ones on his hands healed the worse, and he actually has very little sensation in the back of his hands as a result. His hair is what he takes particular pride in. Being trans, that beard took AGES to grow out. Messing with it would be considered an act of war. Striking moldovite eyes. Freckles like a map of the stars, a big jackass grin. From the shoulders up, he knows he's not terrible looking and is an accidental ladies' man despite being gay as a picnic basket. But everything below that is where he struggles. He's heavily self conscious of his weight and height. He's 5'4" and pretty fluffy. It makes his skin crawl when people try to say "you're not fat, you've got lots of muscle/big boned/etc." He knows the reality and really just wishes people would be honest about it or just not say anything at all. Emmrich's been chipping away at that mountain of insecurity, but he's the only one who gets to reap the reward of that love and reassurance. Any built confidence immediately dissipates when they aren't alone together. But if asked, Laird will say he doesn't mind the top surgery scars and abundance of body hair, at least.
Lore and Attributes: There's far too much for me to unpack with Laird here. But he has plenty little nuggets of lore!
Starters, Laird is a MASSIVE pothead and goes through about 60-70% of Veilguard absolutely baked. The nickname "Rattles" comes from the sound of his gold and gear with his constant shakes. There is no diagnosis or context for the shakig. He just does that. He's the Thedas equivalent of a Mid-November Scorpio (don't @ me for not knowing off the top of my head the DA calendar confuses the shit outta me). He likes to keep his nails painted either black, lavender, minty green, or some sort of cat eye. He loves Malachite. He's obsessed with the big black pheonixes seen all over Hossberg, though Emmrich refuses to let him try and domesticate one (sad). Laird has a mild pineapple problem. He's allergic to seafood (not that it matters lol), latex (in modern AUs), and wasps. He does have an unpublished Modern AU I'm too chicken to actually post. (though smut art does exist of it 👀). His favourite flowers are bronas blooms and orange blossoms. He's incredibly brother coded, whether or not thats older or younger depends on the person. He's horribly awkward with children but can fake it super well for like 10-15 minutes before he runs out of scripted Cool Dad Friend dialogue. His magic also smells different and changes shades of green based on his mood at casting!
Laird also has a very distinct scent. He'd never divulge but I wrote his ass so I will:
Base Notes: Patchouli, Magnolia, Oud Wood
Middle Notes: Peppercorn, Juniper, Vetiver
Top Notes: Indigo, Bergamot, Oakmoss
A notable factoid I enjoy, Laird absolutely loves his parents. He's right smack between being his eldritch father's feral son and a total mama's boy. For all his smartass antics, Myrna and Vorgoth raised him well and he will fight anyone that downplays their validity as family. Post-Veilguard, he aims to inherit Myrna's role as Keeper of Seals.
Last tidbit, and perhaps my favourite... Laird has a portrait painted by @deny-the-issue! *Sigh* if only it were in game. It would be found in Myrna's quarters if it were and the Necropolis was better expanded upon. Regardless, my bestie is super fucking talented and you can pry this piece from my cold dead hands.
That's all I have the spoons to write BUT I hope this gives you lovelies a better insight into this little orange cat bastard I have cultivated over this weird fucken year. If you aren't satisfied tho, go on ny blog and search the tags #laird "rattles ingellvar or #laird ingellvar. I promise you will be blessed with a whole trove of memes, ask games, tag games, and art/photos of this lil dingus. 🥰
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