You're welcome to pick one of the 3 names above, but most people know me as Bone Dad!
A03 | Bluesky
Top 5 Songs atm:
There's a whole lot to unpack about me, but I'll save that for the actual socializing! Let me tell you a lil what I do, tho!
I'm your dose of Daily Paramortem! If it's about dead shit, I'll probably be vibrating a normal amount to tell you about it. For instance...
I pyrograph bones! Very real, and a lil hazardous!
I do this professionally, though I'm stepping away from taking customs for a good while. I do occasionally have adoptables up for sale. :3 I love finding ones that need restoration and a lil extra love. The more I need to repair and embalm, the better.
As shown above, I am indeed a pagan and necromancer! Dispelling the big issues now: I will not dig up your dead relatives or pull the unsolicited medium act on you. Necromancy as I practice it largely revolves around spirit communication and osteomancy (divination via bones) and is extremely draining. I certainly don't offer it for free nevermind without being asked. But I'll happily explain what I do when prompted! Curiosity and destigmatizing the occult are wonderful things!
Those two lads on my shoulder aren't just props! They're my best boys and play a big part in my personal practice! They're my friends, my wards, my teaching assistants, and my familiars!
As for the Norse part, I'll keep it short: I firmly believe in keeping the ALL in Allfather, as well. You ever see those right wing Mjรถlnir wearing crazies and folkists and odinists? Yeah I'm not with them screw that. I won't preach or yap supremacy or favouritism between รsir and Vanir. I'm just a lil guy who wants to practice by himself and occasionally teach the fundamentals of witchcraft. I'll enlighten people about Norse mythology and language upon request, but never with an intent to convert. Any and all religious talk with me is a matter of intellectual discussion and education.
Lastly but perhaps most notably, I'm an artist! That was a title I hesitated to use for years. I actually quit art for a decade until I finally found my Crypt Kiddos. My found family really pushed me to rediscover my love of art, and I owe the happiest days of my life to them for it. If you've seen my art, it's almost definitely from the Veilguard fandom. You may have seen my orange cat bastard, Laird Ingellvar, at some point! Always harassing his gentleman husband.
The Veilguard fandom has really taken me out of my comfort zone and opened me up. I'm still figuring out a lot between my art style and my work. But I'm just really happy to be around. I've got a lot of wonderful people helping me find all the pieces. ๐
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If you read all this, thanks! Consider giving me a follow if you like memes, music, chaos, fandom, and macabre nonsense. You'll see me repost a LOTTA stuff from my friends. Those are the ones you wanna follow. They're some of the most beautiful and talented people I know. ๐ฅฐ
Asks on literally anything are always open! Shoot me a question about bones, blorbos, or what's wrong with me! ๐ And if you ever need a safe space, Bone Dad's gotcha. ๐
Fuck ICE. Fuck Trump. Free Palestine. Slava Ukraini. Art is ALWAYS political. BLM. Trans Rights are Human Rights. Vaccines do not cause autism. Fund Planned Parenthood. Keep gay marriage and abortions legal. Micro-activism matters. Eat the rich. Fuck AI. Just so we clear where I stand! ๐คโจ Also pineapple belongs on pizza! ๐
Yesterday, @paramortality surprised me with over 200 screenshots of my Rook, Vaelyn Ingellvar! I'm so honoured, and I truly can't thank you enough! They're now all saved to a special folder on my computer. Forever. ๐ฅน
Unfortunately, Tumblr only lets me upload thirty photos on one post, but I wanted to share some of my favourite shots, because they're just too precious to keep to myself. Thank you so much for this heartwarming, wonderful gift! ๐๐๐ฉท
EHEHEHEHEHE I'M SO HAPPY I COULD DO THIS FOR YOU!! And I'd do it again! >:3
Vae is so very loved AND SO ARE YOU GIRLY!! I had an absolute blast being her one-man paparazzi. And it gave me an excuse to download some very beautiful outfit mods!! And DAYUM GIRL SHE ATE????
Get fuckin loved bby I can't wait to see what all shenanigans you get into with all the new Vae content! ๐๐๐๐๐๐
It occurs to me how much brighter my world has become by the way my taste in colours has changed. Which sounds stupid probably but I am that flavour of autistic ig. I follow what visually or audibly matches my feelings at a period in my life. And right now, I'm in a better place than I think I've ever been.
Why did it occur to me?
Because for the entirely of my life, I've hated pastels. Loathed them. I always sought out pitch black and jewel tones and neons. Pastels were completely unappealing to me for no reason other they represented a sort of bright, soft, sense of safety and positivity that, at the time, I was never privy to or could wrap my head around.
This was the image I took as my wallpaper regularly for years between the odd blorbo pics.
This is my wallpaper and theme as of two nights ago.
Even fucking discord I changed. Soft icons.
Is this completely unnecessary and trivial of an observation? Certainly. Is it worth sharing? Fuck if I know what itches your brain.
But the fact I see something as simple as pastels and feel something I couldn't before feels deeply profound in how my perspective has changed. And I think my brain rewiring itself like that is really neat.
I have an adventure I'm looking forward to, so my tastes are gradually tracking more upbeat! ๐
Sleep Token still absolutely dominates the charts of my Spotify but I do have to listen to other artists sometimes LOL
No pressure tagging my homies! @lilacvolkarin @deny-the-issue @junejems @holdingontojupiter @czarzarr @sofiemystique @ermagerdperpehs @yappacadaver @y00ms @tacoteddy22 @strugglinggranola AND YOU ๐ซต
Thank you so much @paramortality for being my partner in crime for the incredible What Comes After zine! I had a blast, and I'm always happy to make Laird blush in romantic situations! ๐ฅฐ
That night, the Memorial Gardens had never seemed so alive. Wisps drifted through the air like wandering stars, and motes of magic swirled around the monument, humming with the quiet pull of the Fade. Laird had spent years studying death, sorcery, and all that lay between, yet nothing had prepared him for what Emmrich could do.
Or for what he could make him feel.
Their kiss, their first shared breath, was electric. Warmth bloomed across his lips, then raced down his spine in a slow-building pleasure that made him shudder. It felt like a dream, but the taste of Emmrich, the soft moan, the familiar scent of his cologne, kept him tethered to reality. This wasn't a dream; it was paradise.
"What a day of unexpected splendour."
Emmrich beamed, his hands coming to rest at Laird's waist. The motion was gracious, unhurried, as though giving him all the time in the world to pull away if he wished. When he didn't, Emmrich's lips found the sensitive skin beneath his beard, just above the collar of his sleek Mourn Watch regalia.
The sensation was surreal. Transcendent. Laird's shoulders sank, tension draining from him as though Emmrich had pressed some hidden release. He lingered there, nose grazing the freckles scattered along Laird's neck before placing another, firmer kiss to a spot that made him shiver.
A rapt, helpless sound escaped the younger man, and his hands rose instinctively to clutch at the front of Emmrich's vestโa response Emmrich took as encouragement. His lips moved lower, patient and attentive, the kisses growing deeper as he traced the column of Laird's throat. Maker, it was wonderful.
Too wonderful.
A nervous tremor began to stir behind Laird's ribs, then spread outward until his knees nearly gave wayโthough not from weakness. His mind raced ahead, hurtling towards scenarios he wasn't sure he could satisfy. He knew where this was heading, and part of him wanted it desperately, but another part recoiled in fear.
What if he did something wrong? What if he couldn't keep up? What if, in the end, he proved himself unworthy of such a remarkable man?
He wasn't prepared, yet Emmrich's mouth pressed more insistently, teeth nipping his neck. His breath hitched. His fingers tightened in the fabric of Emmrich's vest, his entire frame rattling like a branch in a gale. He couldn't hide it any longer. He didn't want to push Emmrich away, but there was a secret heย neededย to tell him.
"W-wait," he stuttered, the word barely forming.
The moment shattered as Emmrich pulled back, concern replacing the passion. His hands shifted to Laird's arms, steadying him as he realised, with great dismay, that the trembling wasn't from excitement.
"Darling?" he asked, his eyes wide with guilt. "Are you all right?"
Laird's face burned. "I'm sorry!" he blurted. "I didn't meanโI justโ!"
"Darling," Emmrich said, taking one of Laird's hands and brushing his thumb over his knuckles. "You haveย nothingย to apologise for, especially if I've made you uncomfortable. If you don't enjoy being touched in such a way," he soothed, "please tell me. I couldn't bear it if I hurt you."
"No!" Laird yelled, shaking his head so hard his ginger hair became a blur of embers. "No, that's not... Iย loveย it when you touch me."
He looked away, utterly mortified, his freckles lost beneath the bright red spreading across his cheeks. He could see Emmrich's confusion, his remorse, and that was precisely what he had hoped to avoid. Emmrich was too kind, too observant. He deserved the truth.
"It's just..."
Silence stretched between them, but Emmrich waited. He didn't prod or chastise. He didn't leave in a fury, as many would have after being brought so close to the edge, only to be denied. He simply held Laird's hand, offering his most encouraging smile, one that swore he would never mock or condemn.
"I've never done this before," Laird finally confessed. "I've neverย beenย with anyone."
The words fell out in a rush of shame, leaving no room for interpretation.
"I thought I could," he added quickly. "But when it started getting... you know... I panicked."
He kept his eyes fixed on the ground for what felt like an eternity, then dared to glance up. To his surprise, Emmrich looked stunned, and unmistakably moved.
"Oh," he breathed. "Forgive me. I was under the impression you'd had preexisting partners."
"I know," Laird choked. "I'm sorry. I didn't tell you because... I thought you'd want someone with experience." He backed away, nails digging into his coat. "I thought I had time to study. I've been... reading sutras, diagrams, trying to memorise techniques. I'm sorry. I'm such a fool."
For a heartbeat, Emmrich simply stared, taking in the humiliation and doubt etched across every inch of Laird's face. Then his expression softened, and he stepped forward, wrapping him in his arms. His hold was gentle but firm, one hand cradling the back of Laird's head, the other pressing between his shoulder blades.
"There isย nothingย foolish about that," he murmured, his voice blissfully strained. "And that you chose me... I amย honoured."
Laird burrowed against him, goosebumps rising on his skin. Emmrich was far too perfect to be real, yet here he was, holding him in a fierce, protective embrace.
"We can move slowly," he vowed. "As slowly as you like."
"You're not... disappointed?"
"Disappointed?" Emmrich pulled back just enough to meet Laird's eyes, a faint smile touching his lips. "My darling,ย no oneย is more fortunate than I. So long as we're together, I'll wait as long as it takes."
"Butโ"
"You couldย neverย disappoint me, Laird. All I want, all I desire, is to be by your side. That alone feels like a privilege I was never meant to have."
Laird tried to speak, to protest, but his words broke, tears welling in his eyes. Before they could fall, Emmrich reached up, wiping them away with the delicate pads of his thumbs.
"There now," he whispered, then hesitated. "Would it be all right... if I kept kissing you?"
Laird's face lit up like a breaking dawn. "Of course!" he cried. "Kissing is fine!"
Emmrich chuckled at the enthusiasm, then cupped Laird's cheeks with a tenderness that made his chest ache. He paused just just long enough for Laird to decide the pace, then leaned in, their lips meeting in a soft, eager press. The kiss was warm, full, and grateful all at once, proving a truth Laird never thought possible: he was more than a passing comfort. He was precious.
He wasย wanted.
When it came to an end, if only for the sake of breath, Laird was dazed, panting, his face flushed with heat. Emmrich, though usually more composed, looked no better; his poise slipped as he savoured the moment.
Then, with a hint of playfulness, he flicked Laird's nose. "I'll kiss you anywhere you like," he grinned. "And I promise never to cross any boundaries."
Laird, dizzy and speechless, lifted a finger and bashfully pointed to his nose, where Emmrich had just teased him. The older man obliged, gently kissing the tip before turning it into a tiny nip that made Laird spasm.
He pointed to his forehead next.
Another kiss.
He tilted his head, extending his neck, and Emmrich's eyes darkened. His favourite spotโthe steady pulse of life, the subtle, intoxicating scent. Slowly, he leaned in and pressed a hungry kiss to the bare skin, his grip on Laird tightening just enough to indulge himself.
The younger man shuddered, coming undone piece by piece. It felt so good. He couldn't get enoughโbut Emmrich was giving everything and taking nothing.
It wasn't fair.
A mischievous thought flickered through Laird's mind, and before he could lose his nerve, he reached up and unfastened the pin at Emmrich's throat. He swallowed hard, the treacherous sound betraying his thirst, and before he realised what he was doing, he undid the first nine buttons of his shirt, the fabric parting to reveal a stretch of pale chest beneath.
Emmrich, though taken aback by Laird's sudden boldness, made no move to stop him, allowing the exploration, ready to sate any curiosity. But when his breath hitched, aroused and raring, Laird froze, his fingers hovering at the threshold.
"Am I... being cruel?" he stammered. "I don't think I'll be able to go any further than this."
Emmrich smiled, eyes shimmering. "There isย nothingย cruel about that," he assured him. "Please, don't fret, my darling. Take it as far as you like. I'll not pressure you for more."
Relief spread across Laird's face, along with a thrill of something fragile and unfamiliar. Gently, he gripped Emmrich's collar and began peppering the exposed skin with light kisses, each one building his courage.
Emmrich inhaled sharply, his eyes squeezing shut. A shameless "yes" escaped his lips as he pulled Laird closerโnot possessively, but adoringly. How he managed such restraint, Laird couldn't fathom. Perhaps it was his age, his experience, or perhaps it was love holding him back, because he would not risk making Laird uncomfortable, no matter how much he wanted to ravage him, even here, on the hallowed monument.
"Laird..." he sighed, shaping his name like a benediction.
"Emmrich, Iโ"
"What do you think you're doing?!"
Both men flinched, Laird very nearly leaping out of his skin. That voice. That stern command.
Myrna.
Holding his breath, Laird turned to find her scolding Manfred, who had unwittingly wandered into a rosebush and crushed the stems beneath his feet. Emmrich had tasked him with trimming the deadheads, giving himself and Laird a much-needed moment alone, but Myrna was far less understanding of the wisp's harmless blunders. She would not relentโnot until Emmrich was made to answer for it.
"Where's the professor?" she asked, her tone laden with the air of a discontented parent. "I can't believe he left you unsupervised."
Before she could catch sight of them, Laird felt a jolt of panic. He couldn't allow her, the woman who had raised him, to see him in such a state: entangled with the love of his life in the sacred Memorial Gardens. With haste, he yanked Emmrich by the wrist, muffling the chime of his bangles, and drew them both behind the towering statue of King Caspar Pentaghast.
"Darling," Emmrich said, charmingly oblivious as he was dragged into the shadows. "Is there a reason we're hiding?"
"Can't let Mum see us," Laird shushed, frantically peering around the corner. "She'll probably head to the kitchens, or maybe the mines to find us. Let's wait her out."
Emmrich smirked. Laird sounded less like a grown man in a perfectly suitable relationship and more like an initiate sneaking out of his dorm after curfew. Though, he supposed being discovered under such circumstances would invite a measure of awkwardness, with his shirt left artfully undone and Laird bearing the evidence of their indiscretions along his neck.
"As you wish," he said. "However..." With a grin, he wrapped his arms around the younger man, caressing places that nearly made him squeal. "I do hope you'll tell her about us soon."
Laird moaned, his back pressing against Emmrich's chest, his apprehension ebbing away. Suddenly, nothing else existed. He closed his eyes, surrendering to the feel of Emmrich's touchโteeth nibbling his ear, a leg slipping between his thighs. Emmrich never crossed the line, but he knew how to dance along it masterfully, turning Laird to butter in his grasp.
"Promise?" he purred.
"Yes..." Laird wheezed, magic crackling at his fingertips.
"Easy, darling. Control your mana or you'll summon the wisps. You wouldn't want them to lead Myrna to our little hidey-hole, would you?"
"You're enjoying this..." Laird groaned, though he couldn't bring himself to sound truly annoyed.
"Immensely."
Emmrich's voice was velvet, laced with quiet amusement. His hands pulled Laird further into the dark with near-greedy urgency, and the closeness did little to quell the flutter of his heart.
"Does itโ?" Laird stopped, grimaced, then forced himself to finish. "Does getting... excited... often result in magical outbursts?"
There was a brief pause. Then Emmrich leaned in, pressing a provocative kiss just below Laird's ear.
"It depends on the mage, my dear."
That didย notย help.
Laird gasped, his mind reeling. "I-I see. And... how do you feel about that?"
A chuckle brushed against his skin.
"I've never been opposed to magic in the bedroom," Emmrich replied, the words threaded with a sly, unmistakable edge. "In fact, one could say I'm quite the proponent for it."
Laird made a small, strangled sound that might have been a laugh if it weren't so thoroughly overwhelmed by embarrassment. Emmrich deserved better. Why was he wasting his time on someone like himโa disgrace of a necromancer banished from their homeland? Why would he want someone so hopelessly inexperienced, who couldn't even meet his touch without trembling?
Before he could spiral further, Emmrich's grip shifted. He turned Laird to face him, their breath catching in the narrow space between them. Once again, he gave Laird the chance to pull awayโand once again, he didn't. Emmrich's expression had softened, the teasing glint giving way to something vulnerable.
"I love you," he said.
Those words struck Laird like a sudden gale, stealing the breath from his lungs. Emmrich had said it with such ease, such disarming honesty; yet beneath that enviable confidence, something writhed in his hazel eyes.
Uncertainty, virulent and painful.
Laird wondered how many times he had bared his soul, only to be rejected. Was he alone now, in his later years, because he feared trying again, enduring another heartbreak?
Did he fear his love was unrequited?
"I..." Laird's throat clenched, but he refused to make Emmrich wait a second longer. "I love you, too!" he shouted. "Iย loveย you, Emmrich.ย I love you."
It felt bigger saying it aloud. Real. Undeniable and without regret.
Emmrich smiled, his brow furrowing as he teetered on the brink of tears. Laird wanted to say more, to swear he would never be alone again, but before he could speak, Emmrich, still mindful of the tenuous balance of magic and emotion thrumming between them, captured his lips, the kiss an explosion of gratitude.
"More, darling?" he asked, his eyes closed, mouth never quite leaving Laird's.
The question, the compassion, the pure devotionโeverything about him was a temptation Laird found himself increasingly unwilling to resist. Perhaps, he thought, as his tongue traced the silken seam of Emmrich's lips, he had more in him tonight than he realised.
Tonight, and many nights after.
"Yes," he begged. "Keep going."
Somewhere beyond them, the last of the wisps drifted away, their curiosity fading into a rare, silent understanding, and, unnoticed entirely, Myrna and Manfred were already gone.
Collabing with you has no higher honour bby!! Thank you for doing immeasurable justice with my boy and putting up with me as your collab partner!! ๐๐๐๐
Thank you so much, @starfleetteddybear, for creating this adorable preview for @paramortality's and my collab for the upcoming What Comes After zine! This was incredibly sweet of you, and I look forward to reading your story as well! ๐ฅน
Everyone, please support @starfleetteddybear! They're so kind and incredibly talented! ๐ฉท
A while ago I did this commission for the great @paramortality !! โค๏ธโค๏ธ I can't express how much wonderful and amazing he is. He's a person with a golden heart, always there if you need. And for this reason I was so honoured to create something for him, with Emmrich and his OC Laird.
Thank you my friend for supporting me and untrusting me with them.
Genuinely obsessed with this piece and keep coming back to it! So much so it's wiggled its way into my Paralives save as a custom painting in their house. Falesia my darling you are a TREASURE ๐
