warnings: fluff, reddit, established relationship, engagement and pregnancy announcement
a/n: this was not supposed to be this long but it got away from me. its also not proof read so i apologise for any mistakes. the photos used in this piece are also only there for reference and are not meant to be indicative of what the reader looks like
What better way to announce something to your coworkers and fans than with an update on the reddit story you posted about being in love with your best friend and roommate?
Sitting on the couch at the back of the studio, you watched and laughed as Amanda and Angela exploded on the couch at the reddit story Shayne had just read. You always loved reddit stories, it was one of your favourite shows to be on and watch, though it had been a while since you had been on set for one because of other commitments. But today was special, today your story was going to be read out and your friends on camera were in for quite the surprise.
Finishing up the 2nd to last story, Shayne let out a small chuckle and looked to you on the couch quickly with a questioning glance before moving back to his camera mark.
“Okay this is our final story and Bailey has put a note that it is one of [Y/N]’s favourites”
From her spot behind the camera, Bailey gave you a sly smile and a wink. She was the only other person in the room apart from you who knew what was about to happen and what the story really was.
Angela immediately perked up a little, sitting up from where she had slouched on the couch after the last story and tucked her legs up under her and leaned into Amanda, ready to give her full attention to this story, eyes briefly flashing to look at you before they went back to Shayne, “Oh my god, this is goinna be good.”
Amanda laughed beside her and nodded in agreement, “Oh yeah, [Y/N] has shown me some of her favourite stories before, I’m excited for this.” Shayne let out a little laugh and nodded with them.
“This story comes from r/Relationship_Advice and is from 2020 and is titled ‘I’m in love with my best friend and roommate’”
Amanda and Angela both let out a little aww at the title but Amanda was quick to say “As much as I love a good friends to lovers story, let’s hold off on that because these other stories have been insane, let wait until we hear the whole story.”
“Yeah, yeah. You’re right, let’s lock in.” Angela quickly steeled her face and you let out a small chuckle from where you sat behind the camera, already knowing what story was coming and as Shayne started a reading, a small content smile made its way to your face.
“Obligatory, this is a throwaway account. I (f 28) am in love with my (m 29) best friend and roommate who we will call Charlie for anonymity. In 2016, I moved to a new city for work and was invited to a party by a friend, where I met Charlie and we hit it off right away. We have very similar tastes in music, videos and games and we spent around 70% of the party talking to each other and swapped numbers and we quickly became close, going out to new movies, finding the most obscure indie movies to watch together and having many game nights at one of our apartments. It was these game nights where our friendship really blossomed, we would talk about anything and everything and conversation would be so easy because we would never run out of anything to talk about and even in moments of silence, it was soft and comfortable. Working in the entertainment industry, I sometimes feel like I’m having to perform when I’m in the office to match the energy of those around me but with Charlie there was no performance needed. We could simply exist in a shared space and enjoy each other's presence, there was no need to perform or entertain, we could just be ourselves.”
Amanda and Angela both melted a little on the couch, sweet smiles tracing their lips and you couldn’t help but smile as well. The early days of your friendship with Spencer were quite englightning, in previous friendships you had always given away parts of yourself, energy and time, but had never gotten anything in return. You were the person people turned to when they needed a shoulder to cry on, someone to vent to or even just someone to stave away the boredom, but when you needed that your friends never had the time and it took you a very long time to learn that it wasn’t healthy. That relationships, even friendships, are a give and a take and you were always giving and giving and giving until it ran you dry.
But it was never like that with Spencer, if you needed him he was there. Even if he was a country away, the second you text him that something was wrong he was on the phone to talk you through it and support you. He reached out to you as much as you reached out to him, you were the first person he would text in the morning and at night and even if he didn’t have much time he would still take the time to send a silly meme or a funny picture captioned ‘you’ because he knew it made your day just a little bit better. He included you in plans and events outside of your weekly game or movie nights, inviting you as his plus one for things Smosh was involved in and always bringing you to the holiday parties at the office and introducing you to people as his best friend with the widest grin on his face.
And you would do the same for him, picking up the phone when he needed you and rushing to his place with snacks and shitty movie recommendations that you could laugh at when he had a bad day, supporting him through many late night editing nightmares with corrupted files and bad audio, texting him things that reminded him of you. And when you couldn’t be there in person, you were sending him memes and videos throughout the day, post mating him coffee and kickstarts and sending little reminders to drink water and get up and walk when you knew he would be stuck at the editing bay for hours. Taking him out to cool food spots you found, little unknown family ran businesses that had the best vibes and great customer services, bringing him to movie events and press events for projects you were working on and proudly introducing him to your family as your favourite person when they came to visit you.
One of you never took more than the other, or gave more. It was a mutual comfortable companionship where you never demanded more than what the other could give. It was the foundation of every part of your relationship, platonic and romantic. As Shayne moved on in the story, you tuned back in despite knowing every word by heart.
“Then in 2018, I started workin for the same digital media company Charlie and our mutual friend worked at, as an editor and production assistant. My desk was right next to his, and on my first day he left my favourite snack and monster flavour (despite the many playful arguments we had over monster vs kickstart) alongside a note of encouragement, which I thought was really sweet”
“That’s so cute.” Amanda had raised her hand to her heart and looked like she was starting to tear up a little at the words, Angela nodded her head in agreement and let out a little chuckle as well as she voiced her thoughts.
“I honestly thought that Spencer was the only person who drinks Mountain Dew Kickstart.”
Laughter boomed throughout the room, all of the cast and crew laughing at the comment, including you. Spencers love for the energy drink was a well known thing and a recurring joking argument in your relationship was if monster or kickstart was the superior energy drink. Once Shayne’s laughter had quietened down, he continued with the story.
“The notes became a recurring thing, if I had a long day full of meetings and preparations for videos I would find a note on my computer screen with either a joke or encouraging words and it always perked me right up if I was feeling down. Charlie also worked as an editor at the time and during long days that stretched into nights of editing we fell into a comfortable pattern of sharing snacks and jokes like they were sacred texts that only existed in the space of the editing bay and only existed for us to know about. We would talk and laugh and help the other when it was needed but somewhere along the way it turned into something more. Our chairs would end up closer together, his hand would find mine to rub soothing circles against the skin to ground me when I got frustrated, mine would be on the base of his neck rubbing at the muscles to relieve the tension and aches in it from sitting slouched most of the day. Casual touching became our normal and what had started in the quiet space of our editing sprees spread outside of it, his hand on my knee when driving, holding my hand when walking through a crowd, my head in his lap when watching movies and his hands in my hair.”
Amandas eyes narrowed slightly, suspicion starting to worm its way into her brain as her eyes scanned the room and landed on your. She wasn’t with Smosh when you started working with them, but you were sure you had heard the stories of how much you and Spencer acted like a couple before you were actually a couple. She let out a little “okay” before turning back to Shayne, but she still looked a little suspicious.
“I think those were the earliest moments I remember being like ‘oh shit, i like him as more than a friend’ but I truly tried to push it down and push it away because I didn’t think he felt the same and I didn’t want to ruin what we had and risk losing him. So I ignored the feelings, pushed them to the side and just stayed being the best friend I could be. Recently however, I’ve been finding it hard to ignore it. Just before the lockdown started, we moved in together. Don’t get me wrong, I love living with Charlie. He’s a great roommate but being in such close proximity with him, almost 24/7, has made ignoring my feelings difficult”
You remember moving in with Spencer, it was a necessity at the time but one you wouldn’t change for the world. The panic around the pandemic was rising and when the whispers of a lockdown started both of your previous roommates took the chance to go back to their homes while they could, which you fully understood, so not being able to afford rent on your apartments by yourselves, you and Spencer moved in together. It was simultaneously one of the best decisions of your life and one of the most stressful.
Spencer was a good roommate, more than that he was a fantastic roommate. He took care of his own mess and laundry, was happy to help with chores and understood boundaries and when you needed your own space. He never once complained when you asked him to do something and was always quick to help when you needed a hand, very quickly the two of you moved with a quiet domesticity that was natural and almost seemed inevitable.
And then the quiet, casual intimacy that was born in the editing bay evolved into something more again. His hand on your waist as he reached into a cupboard above you, how his hand always reached for yours across the couch on movie night only to pull you closer to lay against his body, your legs thrown over his while you worked on scripts and ideas for lockdown appropriate videos and he played games on the tv, how casually he would pull you to sit on to his lap when he wanted you to check something on the video he was editing.
The most daming one of all that sent you spiraling and triggered the original reddit post was how he looked at you like there was something reverant about you. You hhad been helping him edit a games video, your focus on the screen in front of you and then when you turned to Spencer to tell him it all looked good you caught him staring. Your breath had hitched and your heart pounded hard against your chest, almost to the point of pain and you were convinced Spencer could hear it. The look he had given you was so intimate and vulnerable. It was as if he was seeing deep into the very being of your soul and had seen every part of it, all the good, the bad, the pure and the broken and he had decided that there was something sacred and beautiful about it. Something worth loving in it. And it terrified you.
So much so that when he reached a hand out to cup your cheek, you quickly made an excuse about needing to finish something for your meeting the next day and practically ran out of the room and into your own where you proceeded to spiral and spill your guts to reddit.
“Every day it gets harder and harder not to tell him how I feel. We could be doing the most mundane thing like washing dishes together or cooking and I look over at him and I just become so overwhelmed with feelings and emotions that I want to blurt out that I love him. Just tonight, I was helping him edit something and when I turned to tell him that it looked good I froze. He was looking at me like he loved me too and my heart felt like it was going to explode but I didn’t say anything, instead I ran out of the room with the excuse of having work to do and came to reddit instead because I needed to get this out of my system. I have never had anyone look at me the way he did, like they loved every single part of me and they he had already planned our future together in their mind. So reddit, any advice?”
Shaynes voice was soft as he finished the story and you smiled softly to yourself as every emotion you were feeling that night came back with the memories. Angela and Amanda both had tears in their eyes and they were snuggled up together on the couch with Angelas head on Amandas shoulders. There was silence for a few seconds as the pair gathered their thoughts and feelings about this story. Amanda was the first to speak, her throat clearing before she did so she didn’t sound choked up, “Okay, well first of all. Girl, go get your man.”
Angela and Shayne laughed at Amandas comment and she continued, “You also better tell me there's an update to this one.” She glared slightly and pointed at Sahyne, trying her best to look intimidating and scary and Shayne only laughed but he nodded his head.
“There is an update but let's get some comments and thoughts from you guys first.”
Amanda just replied with a “Good” as her gaze softened again, there was still a little look of suspicion in her eyes as she pieced together timelines and the story but she didn’t voice it and when she looked at you, you just smiled.
“I can see why it’s one of [Y/N]’s favourites, she's a sucker for friends to lovers. I agree with Amanda, go get him OP. Tell him how you feel! If I can tell through this reddit post just how down bad for you that man is, then OP needs to tell him.”
Shayne nodded along to what Angela had said and rubbed a hand against his jaw, “Yeah, like it definitely seems from what OPs saying that Charlie also has feelings for them as well but as always with reddit stories we’re not getting the full picture,”
Amanda and Angela nodded and agreed but Amanda was quick to jump in with, “Yeah, I get that but I don’t know…Theres something about this post that is so uniquely vulnerable that I can’t help but feel like we’ve got a pretty good look at whats happening. I mean, its a little cliche and like a hallmark movie but we’ve seen things like this play out in real life. Like friends and coworkers who start dating and fall in love, its is a very real possibility”
“Yeah, it's a very real possibility. I mean we saw it play out with Shayne and Courtney and even though we weren’t here for it, Spencer and [Y/N] as well. They were friends who happened to fall in love and they’re each other's perfect matches.” Shayne nodded along to Angela’s words and quickly glanced at you out of the corner of his eyes.
Shayne moves on to reading some of the comments, all of them supportive and encouraging you to tell ‘Charlie’ how to feel and reiterating the same thoughts as Amanda and Angela that he was obviously in love with you too.
As the studio door opens, you smile and scooch over on the sofa, Spencer carefully sneaks behind the cameras and joins you on the sofa his arm automatically wrapping around your shoulders and pulling you against his chest. “Have they got to it yet?”
His whispers into your ear gently and you grin up at him and shake your head, “They’ve just done comments and they’re moving onto the update now.” A wide grin stretches across Spencers face, matching your own and he places a kiss on your forehead before turning back to watch Shayne reading the next part of your story.
“Okay, so the update was posted literally this morning. 5 years after the original post.” Shaynes eyes scan down the update as he speaks and you and Spencer can’t help but laugh as his eyes widen in shock and he so so slowly moved around to look at the two of you on the couch, the camera following his line of sight and showing you almost doubled over in laughter as Spencer clutches his stomach. Amanda and Angela look between the two of you and Shayne with questioning looks on their face and Angela starts to almost shout, “What is happening right now? Shayne what is going on?”
Shayne shakes his head and turns back to Amanda and Angela who are looking at him with raised eye brows, “Okay, okay lets get into this update. You guys aren’t ready for this”
Despite still being confused about what is happened, Amanda and Angela settle back into the sofa and give their full attention as Shayne starts.
“Hi guys, I know its been 5 years since the last post on this account but I got a little overwhelmed with everything that happened and got swept up into my life with my boyfriend ‘Charlie’. For thos who are new here, back in 202 in the middle of the lockdown I posted about how I was in love with my best friend and roommate Charlie and I received a lot of positive comments encouraging me to tell Charlie how I felt. It has been 5 years since that post but there's been some big developments in the last few months that I thought an update was deserved.”
“Oh my god they're married!” Angela practically jumped out of her seat as she shouted and Amanda placed a hand on her shoulder while laughing at her antics as Shayne laughed along, “Settle down babe”
“Okay first of all, after posting my story I stayed up until 2am reading the comments on my original post and crying at all the support everyone had shown me, I can’t thank you all enough for the words of encouragement because without it, I think I would have sat and spiralled about how I destroyed any chance of a relationship with the most amazing man alive. Secondly, after reading all the comments I put on my big girl pants and went to see if Charlie was still awake, thankfully he’s a night owl and frequently stays up late playing games or watching movies and I found him in the living room with a movie on in the background. I asked him if we could talk and he said yes. I’m not going to go into the details of our conversation because it got very personal and very vulnerable.”
Spencers squeezed your shoulder gently and started rubbing soft circles into the fabric of yours (his) jumper, that conversation was hard to have. Vulnerability was always a little foreign to you, showing feelings and weaknesses, something you feared because it had been turned against you time and time again, but with Spencer it was different.
That night you laid your soul bare to him, every heartache that led you to be who you were today. Every little thing that was said and done to you that made you fear not only being in love, but being loved by another person so wholly and completely. Every insecurity you had and reason you felt you didn’t deserve to be loved tumbled out of you like a tidal wave that just couldn’t be stopped once you had started. You cried, Spencer cried but still he held you in his arms and rubbed your back as he promised you he loved you. You were never too much and never would be too much. He loved how much you cared and how you loved with not just your entire heart but your whole being. He loved everything about you, not despite but regardless.
That night your living room changed from simply a shared living space to a sacred sanctuary where the first chapter of your love story was etched into your bones and souls and the cosmos as you promised to show up for each other and love each other through the hardest moments of life.
“But we did talk and realised we had both been harbouring feelings for each other for a while and we began dating. The last 5 years have been absolutely incredible. I won't lie and say that it's been all sunshine and rainbows and that it's been easy the whole time, because it hasn’t. Like any couple we’ve had fights and arguments and stressful situations but one of the things we both value in a relationship is open and honest communication so we’ve always been able to work through these things even if it does take a few days to actually sit down and talk. Because that's what love is, it’s showing up and trying even when things are hard. Now onto the real meat of the update and the reason I decided to post an update, don’t worry its a good thing. Charlie and I recently got engaged!”
Amanda and Angela both smile widely as Shayne reads and lets out a “yay!”, clapping their hands together while Shayne side eyes you and Spencer on the couch before he continues, “It wasn’t a big surprise or out in public, but quiet and intimate and perfect. I had been cooking dinner for us with some music playing in the background when he got home from work (I had left earlier because of a doctor's appointment) and he came into the kitchen, kissed me and started a normal conversation, I was none the wiser. Once the food was done and I removed it from the heat he pulled me back into his chest and started swaying me gently to the music and we danced like that for a few minutes just enjoying the feeling of being in each other's arms. Charlie then spins me and when I turn to face him, there he is down on one knee with a beautiful ring. Through tears, I said yes and now we are happily engaged. It was perfect. Thank you reddit so much for your advice and support, I wouldn’t be here without you and yes I will post a picture of the ring.”
As Shaye finished the story, anxiety shot through you because you knew Amanda and Angela would want to see the ring, it was the whole point of this story being in the video but still you couldn’t help the nerves that bubbled up inside you for your friend's reaction to your engagement. Amanda and Angela wipe small tears from their eyes as they immediately ask Shayne for the iPad to see the photo and you brace yourself. Posted at the bottom your reddit story is a photo of you and Spencer one of his arms wrapped around your chest while he places a kiss to your check and your left hand on his bicep, showing off your engagement ring.
The response is immediate shouting of “what the fuck!” from both Angela and Amanda, followed by both their heads winging round to you and Spencer on the couch. Your anxiety slowly being replaced with happiness and you both laugh at their outburst, they look to the iPad and then back to you and then the iPad and back to you multiple times as the shock settles, the cameras following their movements. “I can’t believe it!” “You gotta be kidding me??”
They both start shouting over each other, questions of how, what, when and where all flying at once and your’re still laughing, tears forming in your eyes, when Angela barrels across the room in what seems like rage but it actually pure joy as she tears you up from the sofa and engulfs you in a tight hug that has the air leaving your lungs.
“Oh my god you guys. This is incredible. Congratulations!” She lets you go and hugs Spencer in the same way as Shayne and Amanda make their way over and hug you too, offering their own congratulations. Though Amanda whispers in your ear, jokingly, about how sneaky that was and she was suspicious that it was you from the first story while also saying how happy she was. After a few minutes of hugs and congratulations, Bailey calls them back onto the set to finish off the video and as everyone settles in again your shout to Shayne “There’s another photo!”
He looks confused for a second before scrolling on the iPad again and coming across the final photo, his jaw dropping open completely as he turns it to Amanda and Angela. This one he doesn’t share with the audience, immediately dropping back into his host persona as he does the outro for the video while Amanda and Angela freak out on the other couch.
“Thank you for watching and let us know how you feel about the bomb that just dropped”
As soon as the cameras are cut, Amanda and Angela aren’t even bothering to get their mic’s off as they run up to you with the iPad and shove it in your face almost accusingly, the photo of the ultrasound staring back at your face and making you smile, both shouting at the same time “ARE YOU PREGNANT?”
Relationship or Relation-No | Reading reddit stories
@ userone: always knew [Y/N] was a reddittor
↳ @ usertwo: they're with spencer, are we sure they're a redditor by choice?
@ userthree: YOU CAN'T JUST LEAVE IT AT THAT! WHAT WAS THE OTHER PHOTO
↳ @ userfour: no literally. that was just...evil
@ userfive: the look on shayne's face as he read ahead on the update absolutely sent me
↳ @ usersix: i was in tears, he has the best facial expressions
notes: smut warning. eeek! last day but not last chapter! slightly rushed because i wanted to get it out asap for you so sorry for any mistakes. i think im gonna carry it on for a little bit of aftermath when they go back to school and wrap it up once the relationship is established? then we’ll go back to normal stand alone fics! 🥰 buckle up for this one because it’s what you’ve been waiting for . . . also i feel im rusty as hell with smut so lmkkkkk. like and reblog <333
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“ALFIE BUTTLE?”
“yeah.”
“as in . . alfie alfie? alfie buttle? from school?”
“yeah,” you smiled.
“what are you doing with him?! since when were you guys friends?!”
“we’re not really . . . i mean — he’s just over here the same time as us, they’re in the same complex as us and everything. but yeah, he basically offered to walk me home.”
your mum hummed on the other end of the phone, scanning the outside from the kitchen sink. “well . . that was awfully nice of him. i really appreciate him doing that for you.”
“i know. it was very nice.”
“and were you ok on your own? you weren’t scared staying by yourself?”
“yeah, it was fine. we got some food together and i just watched some tv when i got back . . yeah, it was fine.”
balancing your phone on your shoulder, you couldn’t stop the grin on your face as you spoke to your mum, updating her on how your trip was going and filling her in on plans when heading home. you’d been telling her about last nights antics when she questioned why you hadn’t stayed with the girls, and told her how there’d been a bit of a fallout, but nothing major. it was basically a bunch of drunk nonsense and that you’d be friends when they all woke up.
“alfie didn’t keep you company?” you could hear the teasing in her voice.
“you allowing a boy in my apartment?”
“not what i said.”
“that’s what i’m hearing,” you sang.
“you dare.”
you chuckled, eyes drifting down to the pool. it was almost nine and the place was still quiet — perfectly expected for a holiday morning, everyone still pinned to their beds from the weight of last night - their hangover would undoubtedly wake them before they could themselves. it was the first morning you’d woken up feeling fresh, clear-headed, awake. no pounding behind your eyes, no dry mouth, no fog to shake off or anxiety to battle against. just a soft, unfamiliar lightness in your chest.
too light.
giddy almost, whether it was from the appropriate amount of sleep you got last night or lack of drink and other substances in your body—
or maybe it was something entirely different.
who knew.
you eyed the empty pizza box on your table, the grin tugging your lips as your mum continued to ramble down the phone, organising your own airport pick-up conditions.
“do you want pizza?”
you looked up from your feet, to your left where you saw the small pizzeria with a bright neon sign outside it. your stocks grumbled at the very thought, and alfie was already side-stepping towards it, his eyes still on you awaiting confirmation.
“hm, yeah. i’m happy with pizza.”
he nodded and lead the way, well, a step ahead, not wanting you to fall short of two steps out of his sight. “i actually don’t even like pizza.”
you froze, mid-step up the curb. “what?”
“i don’t like pizza,” he half-laughed, half-coward with embarrassment in his steps.
“how do you not like pizza? who doesn’t t like pizza?” your thoughts spoke out loud. “it’s—it’s pizza?”
he shrugged his shoulders, hands in his pockets. “saucy, innit.”
“saucy?”
“don’t like red sauce.”
you stared at him with that face you knew was using all the muscles in your face. “i don’t like red sauce but i still eat pizza?”
he shook his head at you. “you’re a fraud.”
you just stood at him, your mouth basically agape with surprise. “ . . . you’re so odd.”
he shrugged, laughing at himself. “told you i’m a fussy eater.”
“no, there’s fussy eater, alfie, and then there’s you.”
he raised his shoulder again.
you watched him, standing up onto the curb and stepping towards the counter. “i’ll ask without sauce?”
“what?! no, no it’s ok,” he stepped in, confusing you a little. “don’t do that.”
“why? they won’t mind?”
“that’s so embarrassing,” he mumbled between you, standing so close you could smell the faint scent of beer on his breath. not in a turnful way, but in a . . musky, manly-scented way — and if kind of made you go what the fuck.
“no it’s not,” you smiled slightly, reassuring him with your eyes before approaching the counter. you felt him grab your wrist you assumed to pull you back but he let go and stepped back, hands in his hair. you didn’t get why he’d be so embarrassed. you didn’t care. you were sure the guy didn’t care so long as you placed that €10 in his hands. “hi! can i get a plain margarita please?”
he nodded, and you eyed the menu, your eyes lighting up as you spotted an even better solution. “oh! alfie, how about garlic bread?” you looked over your shoulder and he looked up from behind you, agreeing. “and a garlic bread as well, please.”
you sat down on the curb with both boxes on your lap, your coins rattling in your hand before you stuffed it back in your pocket. “i didn’t ask for a sauceless pizza . . not that it would’ve mattered,” you handed him his box.
“thanks,” he sheepishly smiled. “i just feel like . . i mean i go to subway and i order ham and cheese . .” he looked at you unashamed but acting like he should be. “i just know they’re judging me hard behind the counter.”
“i wouldn’t care . .” you shook your head. “you think too much of what people care about you — well, unimportant people. i mean you’re never gonna see that guy again,” you nodded to the man in the stall. “and i’m sure he’s seen worse things on this street than a guy ordering a cheese bread.”
alfie nodded, opening his lid. “yeah, you’re right. i dunno, i do care about what unimportant people think. and i usually don’t care what people think.”
“yeah,” you flipped open the top and grabbed a slice, the cheese thick and stringy. your mouth was watering. “thank you, by the way.”
“i fuckin’ love garlic bread,” alfie mumbled before lifting it to his mouth. two seconds later, a sharp gasp left his lips. “AH! FUCK!” he covered it, “fucking scalding!”
you laughed unexpectedly, trying to hold your food in your mouth mid-bite while your eyes closed, chuckling deeply at his stupidity.
“ooowwww,” he continued, looking at you with an amusement in his eyes but a pain - eyes glossy, like if he didn’t laugh right now, he could probably cry. it was very sweet.
“aw,” you shared sympathy, your own eyes glossy from the subtle tears of laughter. “you alright?”
“yeah,” he breathed, wiping his eye, “that fucking burned.”
you laughed again, hunching over slightly, covering your mouth, your chewing on hold.
he could be so funny without trying to be.
you thought of how he’d reached over and tapped his card before you could pay, how he walked on the outside of the pavement without even thinking, how he tried to play off when cheese burned the roof of his mouth when really you knew he was hurt.
your mum could hear the soft snickering on the line. “what are you laughing at?”
“nothing,” you shook your head, “something stupid.”
“hmph . . alright. what’s your plans for today? last night and all that.”
you let out a breath, sipping your bottle of water. “i don’t know. probably go hard tonight.”
“y/n don’t say that!” she groaned. “i don’t want you back in a body bag! nor a bone out of place!”
“mum calm down . . i got holiday insurance.”
“my nerves are away with you, girl. i’m going.”
you laughed over the phone. “alright. i’ll text you later. i miss you.”
“i know, but you’re doing alright. this time tomorrow you’ll be getting ready for the airport.”
“i know. that’s true,” you looked down at the pool again, hearing a slide door open. it was so early you could hear all the weird bugs cricketing and humming about, the birds chirping faintly in the trees. they all went into hiding when the apartment blocks came to life. “alright, i love you. talk to you later.”
“i love you more. please don’t go too crazy.”
“i won’t. love you. bye!”
“bye honey.”
you dropped your phone on your chest, not knowing how to cope with the feeling in your chest. it was almost overwhelming how ticklish it felt, like it wasn’t supposed to feel this relieved.
you were still in the top from last night, the material comfy and more than likely to be a sleep shirt when you got back to the uk.
“should we go in and get you a new top?”
you smiled and shook your head as he took a step towards the one of many identical shops you passed by on the daily when on holiday. the type of shop that sold clothes from flowey tops to swimshorts, bikinis that were trendy back in 2014 to t-shirts with dirty sayings. sunglasses, towels, beach bags, hats, inflatables. it had magnets, snow globes, pens, mirrors, toys like the little robotic walking dogs and designer handbags for a tenth of the price.
“come on, let just go in,” he nodded his head encouragingly, already up the first step.
you fought to roll her eyes although you weren’t entirely mad. you followed him in the cramped space and didn’t know where to look first. scanning for a pretty bracelet or keyring. you plucked three magnets while you were there incase you missed your chance tomorrow for your relatives. alfie nudged your arm and you looked to find him pointing out a lighter with a pair of tits on it.
“what the fuck,” you laughed, picking it up. “maybe i should get this for my nan.”
“was thinking the same thing, you know.” he looked at you, watching a smile break out on your face. you both laughed at the image.
“these are kinda sick,” you tried on a nice pair of shades, liking how they framed your face.
you looked to alfie who handed you the same pair in a better colour. you chose them instead.
“do i look like a dad with these?” he tried on a rectangular pair of 2000s themed, surprisingly pulling them off. “yeah!” you placed a cap on his head, “you look like you’re about to host a barbecue.”
you looked at yourselves in the skinny mirror, taking a moment to realise you were getting carried away with all the gadgets, more than likely not even going to use them back home.
you held up a set with mirrored lenses, and he took his off, letting you slide them on for him. you were then just staring at yourself in them, impressed by the quality. “wow. do not wear those to a poker game.”
alfie smiled, watching your eyes dart across his face, getting a real good look at your eyes without feeling weird about it. “right, let me find a top.”
the shop had some nice pieces you would actually wear, and not all just neon t-shirts with writing like ‘free blowjobs’ or ‘old pussy is better than no pussy’. “i think this will do,” you held up a white bandeau top that was frilly at the end, knotted at the bust. “or this one,” a red one in the other. they were €8.
“that one.”
you held up the white. “this one?”
“yeah, that’s more you.”
your cheeks warmed unexpectedly. “ok.”
you were at the till, paying for your things when he was still messing around with things, trying wicker hates on. “i think i’m gonna buy this.”
he had an odd looking hat on his head, but you just let him be. “whatever you want, babe.”
you paused at the till, grimacing at yourself for the pet name and freaked at our easily it slipped out. you tried to play it off as a patronising joke, but really you were horrified at yourself. alfie noticed it though, and laughed, looking at himself in the mirror. “i do look sick.” he looked over at you.
you rolled your eyes, amused by his antics.
“hey.”
you jumped at the unexpected voice, seeing faye standing at the slide doors of the balcony.
her hair was a nest, recently waken from her slumber. her makeup was still half on, her tiny pyjamas twisted. she looked like she came out of a coma.
“hey.”
she stepped out cautiously, her arms folded into herself. you faced out to the view.
“i just wanted to talk about last night . . apologise for my behaviour.”
you pulled a face, still viewing the scenery. “to be honest, i don’t want to. i don’t care, faye. i accept your apology and i appreciate your maturity for recognising your wrongdoing, but respectfully, you need to stay away from me today. all of you, until i feel like talking to you,” you confessed, your tone plain. “you’re lucky i wasn’t drunker than i was or i would have literally smashed your face in. all your faces in. and partly i still want to, so please just steer clear of me and go back to bed.”
you could feel the tension spawn in as the words left your mouth although your tone wasn’t aggressive. her movements slowed and any sense of easiness, vanished. she no longer felt invited out onto the balcony as she realised you were still upset.
she swallowed, and slowly nodded her head. “ok.”
“thanks.”
she backtracked into the room, leaving you alone again with a exhausting wave of agitation.
you always did try to avoid fights as a whole, especially when anyone was drunk, you know how people get. you never wanted to fight your friends - and you’d never want to hurt them - but when they got in that mood, you had to challenge yourself to not give in - because it’s an unfair fight to begin with, nevermind drunk you.
last night caught you off guard. you felt you didn’t really have a chance to react because you were so goddamn confused — trying to make sense of what was actually happening and what you’d done wrong.
you guess that’s what hurt: you’re friends should’ve recognised your innocence instead of painting it as fakeness . . which again, was confusing on your behalf because when had you ever been fake to your friends?
that was the whole point of a friendship, you weren’t fake with one another?
you tried to settle yourself, to not think of last night and think happy thoughts! and things to look forward to!
beth said the girls were going to go shopping this morning for souvenirs and such to bring home, but you’d declined the invite, explaining you’d already gotten yours last night and was going to spend the morning down at the pool. she didn’t push, and went on to get ready, telling you to enjoy it.
the pool was empty at this time of day, you were the only one down this early, the sun thankfully blasting on full heat as the UV hit a new high of 10.
you put on your tiniest bikini — well, ok, not your tiniest, but one that wouldn’t leave mad tannins nor feel like it was agitating you with tightness or loose strings. you didn’t plan on wearing it at all, but with no one around and the sun at its highest, you thought why not.
your hair was up and out of your way as you tottled on down to the best placed sundeck there was, laying your towel down and placing your belongings beside it.
you were taking it easy today, from start ‘til finish. you took out your kindle and enjoyed the silence after costing some SPF over you, not trying to catch wrinkles before 25, and relaxed. you didn’t even think about last night, nor wondered what the girls were up to. you just zoned in on your book while sweat began to puddle on your stomach, cooking your skin softly.
you’re 20 pages in when you hear footsteps approaching. your eyes lift above the screen to see none other than your companion last night, sunglasses on and a pharmacy bag in his hands, nike sliders scraping the ground.
“oh . . hey.”
“hey,” you shuffle up a little, not wanting your chins to be on show.
“how’s things?” he slows towards you, standing at the side of you, at a distance. he feels like you’ve seen enough of him, like he might be suffocating you a bit with his presence these last few days.
“they’re . . alright. no bad blood but . . space is needed today,” you nod, squinting up at him. his shades are dark, you can’t see his eyes, but even without them, he’s going his best to not acknowledge the absolute scene in front of him which is you entirely oiled up from head to toe; your stomach glistening in a way he almost feels sick. “why were you at the chemist?”
he senses your concern, and opens the bag, looking down at it, “it’s for carter. he’s so burnt, i actually offered to go get him a certain cream that will help. he’s the only one that came home last night. i actually feel a bit bad for him, i know he’s in pain.”
“at least it’s the last day, he should stay in the shade today.”
“yeah, i think that’s the plan. we can’t really leave anyway, the other two have the only keycard, so . . if we go out, we can’t get back in,” he shares, stepping back.
“that’s a bit annoying. you should just stay by the pool today anyway, it’s too warm to be doing anything, i think,” you slide back down, arm over your head.
“yeah. feel like i been up your arse though, you not sick of me?” he makes fun of himself, and you smile, his expression tickling you. “i stick you 5 days a week, buddy, this is nothing new,” you grin.
he still watches you from his door, knocking for carter to answer with a smile on his face before it opens. “i’ll be back out then.”
“UV’s 10. you might as well.”
“dunno what that means.”
you roll your eyes, “it means you’ll get a really good tan today.”
“oh sick.”
you continue sunbathing, book in hand, trying to fight the urge to get in the pool when your front half of your body is thudding like its own heartbeat. you need to flip over, but you need your back protected.
“poor guy’s a lobster.”
“yeah?” you set your book down as alfie comes to sit next to you.
“yeah. i told him to call me if he needs anything else though,” he lays his towel down, taking off his cap. “jesus, it is hot today.”
“i know,” you watch him, eyes scanning his back as he adjusts his things and takes off his watch. “make sure you put suncream on . . especially on your moles.”
he looks at you over his shoulder and smiles, “you sound like my mum.”
“i know but . . i know with my cousin, he has moles and my auntie prioritised them being protected in the sun so just — make sure you’re covered. you’ll still tan.”
he finds it endearing, and reaches for his bottle to squeeze a generous amount in his hand. you watch him until you’re satisfied he’s ok.
he runs it across his chest, around his neck, and even at the sides of his head where his hair is shaven down. he does a good job, but you’re still staring at his back, the little dots along his spine he has no chance of reaching, even with all that muscle. you have to point it out. “your back, alf.”
he looks at you, and in response, holds out the bottle.
you take it, because you know it’s physically impossible for him to do it himself. “move up.”
he’s smiling, because you both know this is cliché, but he knows you’re too cautious for his health to give a fuck. he shuffles up and faces his back to you as you move to his seat and sit behind him, your legs folded.
“i could just put two dots on your back . . .” you say, rubbing it into your hands so it’s not cold, “but i’m just going to cover everywhere because it’s so hot, okay?” you don’t touch him until he give you his permission.
“ok.”
you place your hands on his shoulders, and alfie tries not to flinch. your hands start at his broad shoulder blades, coating them in the protective coconut scent and glide down and around them. already, you’re squeezing more in to cover the base of his back, his muscles like bumps under your palms.
he inhales sharply through his nose.
you don’t say anything.
you move lower, dragging the suncream down either side of his spine, palms flattening, smoothing the liquid out evenly. you were suddenly hyper-aware of how close you were — your knees almost brushing his hips, your shadow falling over him. he fidgets when you reach the dip in his back, his shoulders tensing.
“you’re gonna miss bits if you keep fidgeting.”
“sorry,” he muttered, and he didn’t move. if anything, he went still.
you continued, making sure to leave a slightly heavy dollop on top of the moles for extra protection. “if i do your sides, are you going to be ticklish?”
alfie breathed a laugh, his fingers pinching his head like he was in deep concentration, or fighting a pain, almost. “yeah.”
you smile a bit, “. . so . . you want me to leave it then?”
“no, just do it, i’ll hold my breath.”
you pull a face even though he can’t see it. you let out a loud giggle. “alfie that won’t do anything.”
“i know, just do it!” he laughs, bracing himself.
you ease into it, following the natural slope of his back until your fingers reached his sides and skim his ribs, careful and not hurried. the air feels thicker, as you run the ridges of his his ribcage, feeling muscle there.
the way your hands moulded to the shape of his body, almost gently gripping him when doing his sides—
alfie felt like he was fighting for his life.
it shouldn’t feel like this, he told himself. it was suncream, nothing else, but the slow drag of your hands, the way you were working carefully instead of rushing it —sent a strange, tight sensation through his chest.
don’t be weird, don’t be weird, don’t be weird. he told himself.
he tried to be normal, tried to act as nonchalant as a guy did when a girl —you— sat behind him in a bikini that with everything shining and on show, bare, with fingers as slow and deliberate as they worked over him like it was routine.
he hated to be a pervert — but you had the set pair of tits he’d ever seen - and a girl from school had got a boob job in your year.
“alright,” you slowed, and alfie let out the breath he’d been holding, chest rising fully. you smiled.
he turned before you’d properly finished, muscles moving when he adjusted, stomach flexing, and your eyes landed on the faint trail of darker hair disappeared beneath his swim shorts.
you pulled your hands away, too quickly.
you wiped them on your towel, eyes deliberately averted now. “let it dry before you lie down. it’ll only take a few minutes.”
he nodded, still not trusting his voice, fingers still pinching the top of his nose.
you didn’t question it. just got up and moved back to your original seat.
“thanks.”
“you’re welcome.”
it grows quiet as alfie sits there, doing as you’d told to let his cream dry in.
he watches you next to him. “ so you actually reading or just pretending?”
“i am reading.”
“what you reading?”
“a book?”
he throws his hat at you and you laugh a little, sitting up a bit. “it’s a thriller with a bit of romance going on. i think she’s actually just killed the guy.”
“oh. fitting.”
you glance at him again, catching the line of his jaw, the way his hair seems lighter at the tips, even the solidness of his neck made you wonder how much he actually pushed himself in the gym.
you looked away quickly, heart acting up.
the birthmark near his collarbone caught your eye before you turned. “did you cover that?” you said, deflecting.
“offering your services again?”
“please just put some on it so i can sunbathe in peace. please.”
he smirked, and reached for the bottle anyway.
ᯓ ✈︎
remember you said you were taking it easy?
yeah, well, that was out the window.
you haven’t paid for a single drink all night, every time your cup’s empty, there’s another one shoved into your hand: vodka lemonade; something blue; something pink that tastes like sweets and nothing else - you can’t taste the alcohol, and you know the servers fill the glass half way. it’s dangerous. you know it’s.
you take a sip anyway.
juice. genuinely just juice.
it felt like you just teleported to the strip. getting ready in the apartment was fine, being in the company with the girls was ok too. they came back with a handbag (fake, but a damn good dupe) of the one you’d said you’d hunt down and find the next time you guys went abroad. they presented it to you, saying it was a peace offering and an apology, telling you how they’d all pitched in to buy it for you. you accepted it, wearing it out tonight.
you’re in a floaty state, the drink moving quick, pulling you into that state of perfect drunk.
at least you’re laughing.
the girls are back in your orbit, arms linked, hands around the other, screaming lyrics at the top of their lungs like the song was written for them personally. faye keeps pulling you in for hugs that last too long, pressing her forehead to yours and shouting apologies you can’t quite make out.
courtney grabs your hands and spins you under the lights. the floor is sticky and wet, your feet slide. you nearly go down and all of you shriek, collapsing into each other in hysterics.
everything’s funny.
everything’s loud.
everything feels okay.
your head buzzes, pleasantly empty, like there’s fuck all behind your eyes. just the drink you’ve been consuming, swishing around in your head.
the boys played a drinking game before they came out. it was supposed to be an easy game, something to help pass the time; to play in the back while they all got ready, waiting their turn for the shower and for jay to finish ironing their shirts for tonight. it got to the point where alfie had stepped out of the shower to complete his go and dylan helped jay take his shot without him needing to lift his hand off the ironing board.
they were wonky by the time they’d walked down the street, laughing like lunatics and acting like animals with their rough play and running and jumping into things.
you were at the table, sipping your straw, moving your body casually to the music while the girls prepared themselves for a photo, rustling bags for lip liners, fluffing hair. you clocked the other group among the shuffling about 10 feet away.
the place was packed, and the instant joel clocked you, you knew they were coming to join your table.
he hadn’t even set his cup down when courtney had shoved her camera in his hand. apparently digital cameras were the coming trend. “jo-wel take—take our photo please,” the sound of her slurring made you all laugh.
your eyes drifted, eyeing the crowd when you saw the others, two approaching, two still at the bar. alfie looked at you knowingly.
his expression was flat, his eyes still, glancing at your table; zoned on faye in her cheap cropped jacket, cold on courtney in her stupid feathered top, looking up beth and that tacky necklace around her neck.
you caught it, even when he glanced around the room afterward to play it casual; in his navy polo, fitting him perfectly with where it emphasised him where he wanted it most - catching his slim waist but tight around his biceps, complimenting his skin tone and the tan he’d accomplished this trip. the top button was undone, promising eyes the smallest sight of the start of his chest, not that you didn’t know what it looked like already. his hair was styled effortlessly, not an inch of stubble on his face, clean shaven, his skin glowing.
your eyes trailed down his arms, catching the thickness of his forearms, the faint faint running along it down to his wrist where a heavy watch sat; signet ring on his pinky.
your heart was thumping with the base anyway, the heat sending your head to a floaty place, the sun kicking your ass in the way it knocked any sense out of your head, especially with the company of drink in your system.
you watched him making his way forward like it was against his own will, not mad, just . . disappointed . . uncomfortable almost, like, his face might have been blank but you knew it read ‘for fuck’s sake, not here’ — and selfishly, you didn’t care —
because he looked so fucking sexy.
FUCK! THAT FELT GOOD TO ADMIT TO YOURSELF.
fuck, he did.
he was so fucking sweet.
and he looked so good.
you weren’t even going to hide it, you were tired of acting, the sun leaving you loose - your face was nearly like a kicked puppy, almost as if you could sense his irritated towards you for being back with your mates he’d basically recused you from the night before.
you could feel it in your eyebrows, how they were raised with shame and guilt.
fuck. you were so drunk.
he met your eyes, and one look and he knew how you felt — and he physically couldn’t keep up an act. he dropped his tense attitude upon seeing your knowing stare, and subtly, softly, you could see the tension ease in his face. his eyes falling gentle, the fucking smallest, tiniest lift in the corner of his lip as he circled around to you, still not speaking a word.
he stopped next to you, a step behind, not saying a word. you stood with a sloppy grin on your face.
“Y/N GET IN THE PICTURE!”
you stumbled as jess threw her arm around your neck, pulling you into the end of the photo, your smile so unbelievably drunk, eyes growing heavy, your body weight thrown onto your friend for the small lense to capture. yet, the digi cam was big enough to capture your hand clasped around the bicep in the back for stability, holding you up.
you stepped back onto your feet, looking for your bag, moving your hair from your face as you crouched, however, a hand came to take your own and pull you up slow and steadily, the bag around their arm.
you looked at alfie with your 90s style shoulder bag on his shoulder, your eyes asking the question.
“it was on the floor,” he quietly dropped your hand.
you looked to the handbag.
“it was open.”
your head shot up to his eyes.
suddenly, your drowsy state was alert.
he stared at you.
alfie still had your bag on his shoulder when he leaned down and slowly slipped it down his arm, mouth close to your ear so you could hear over the noise.
“do you want to go to the bathroom?”
you pulled back to look at him, for some reason, feeling like this was a trap. like, there was no way he was actually . . getting at . . doing what you think you were both going to do . . with that . . stuff still sitting in your bag.
he answered for you and lead the way, nodding to the toilets and guided you with a hand on your back, keeping you close in the crowds but carrying the authority to manoeuvre you both through it.
you had some balls still carrying that packet about with the amount of police surrounding the area lately. all the popular holiday destinations had so many law enforcement casually standing around party destinations in full gear: heavy black boots, bulletproof vests, massive guns occupying their hands. you’d become used to it as the nights carried on, but tonight seemed to be the first night you felt actually paranoid with the sexy cops standing about.
waiting on a free stall felt like eternity. standing with your arms crossed, head tilted, leaning on the wall; alfie mirroring you from the wall opposite, both your eyes on each other. it was quieter but still loud with the multiple voices, the air thick and warm, you could almost bite into it.
the girls was jam packed. alfie nodded when he felt the men’s was emptier, and you hesitantly followed, partly ashamed to be heading in with him when you knew exactly what everyone was thinking when seeing you.
hoots and hollers emerged from deep voices as you entered the stall, alfie’s tall frame hiding you mostly from eyes as he shot warning stares at those watching, even so much as pausing before following you in with his hand on the door, his unimpressed face saying it all.
he turned to see big, doe eyes looking up at him from the closed toilet seat, hands clutching both ends of your handbag.
“are you judging me?”
his face screwed up in response.
“do you think i’m a skank?”
alfie’s features deepened further. “what?”
“i don’t even know what it is.”
alfie’s eyes widened at that. “wha—” he looked at your handbag like it was a bomb, “y/n that’s dangerous.”
“well it’s either ket or ‘DMA.”
he swallowed down at you.
not because he was scared, but because as much as much as he slagged the shit out of girls who did drugs on a weekly basis, turned his nose up at and even used as ammo in silly weekend debates -
it was the hottest fucking thing coming from you.
“have you done any of them?”
his shoulders relaxed.
you were asking if he was comfortable.
alfie crouched down so he was eye-level with you, a soft, reassuring smile on his face as he took your handbag from you and grinned. “have you?”
you watched him unzip your bag before snatching it back, holding it to your chest. “be honest — you think i’m a skank.”
his head hit the door of the cubicle, an annoyed look taking his face now. “y/n, i’d never and have never thought of you as skank. i don’t think you’re a dirty . . disgusting, ratty . . sniffing scumbag.”
you were so worried this was the last thing you were going to do with this weird holiday bond you’d formed whilst away before you jetted off home and he told everyone how much of a sleazy, waster, piece of shit you were sticking your nose in a pack of powder every night. you’d be ruined. so unbelievably ruined.
“i think you’re funny. you’ve the biggest fucking nerve talking about everyone else doing it on a monday fucking morning,” he snickers a laugh, and then is unable to hold it back, letting his cackles out.
you joined.
“you fuckin’ bitch!”
you laughed harder, rocking back in your seat as alfie let himself drop onto the floor, holding his stomach.
and just like that, your nerves were gone. you lay against the tiled wall, looking down at him across from him in that stupid, sexy, navy polo top.
“have you had a good night?” he asks.
you watch him, brain going smoosh. “yeah. they’ve been ok.”
he lifts his head in acknowledgment.
“i’m glad you guys came though.”
he just smiles.
you reach for the zip of your bag after watching for a minute, the littlest bit of hesitation numbing in your fingers, for the simple fact that, you felt like you didn’t need it. you were content how you were, happy with the buzz you had rocking with the drink alone - but - alfie was already here, you were here, he was here for one reason and one reason only and you weren’t going to let him down.
besides, when you were left with the girls, you’d be thankful for the hit.
alfie watched your fingers pop open the bag, drowning out the noise in the room as you both became hyper-focused on the task at hand. you looked from the packet to him, your heart racing a little, your cheek beginning to flush.
why was this so embarrassing???
“you first,” you tilted it to his direction.
alfie shuffled forward until he was infront of you. his hand curled around your wrist, keeping it steady while the other felt for something in his pocket.
upon patting himself down, he swore under his breath, and looked to the side in thought. “. . . joel has my key . . .”
without missing a beat, you scooped your acrylic, pinky nail into the bag of powder and held it out under his right nostril.
alfie tried to hide his amusement in this serious situation, and dipped his head ever so slightly, locking his eyes with yours.
he stayed with you after few minutes after you’d snorted your share up your nose, the embarrassment and shame still hanging heavy while looking at him afterward.
you still half-expected that certain look from him. the one where his eyes held that unavoidable judgement in them. a smugness to him that said ‘you’re just like the rest of them.’ you were ready for him to leave, to snicker and walk away, to fill the boys in on what he’d just got up to with you in the stall and maybe even add his own little spin to it.
but he didn’t.
he watched you tip your head back while patting down your nose, placing the tiny baggie in your handbag with the smallest twitch in your hand. “you alright?”
his voice spooked you despite its monotone, and you looked at him, nodding, tucking your hair behind your ear that kept falling forward. you sat on the toilet lid while he remained on the floor in front of you, waiting for you to make the move that reassured him — you were okay.
you could hardly look at him, waiting for the high to kick in so you could get on with your night.
but when you stole a glance at him, alfie was already watching you — no judgement. no smugness. no amusement. nothing.
he reached forward and moved the hair out of your face again, his fingers sliding smoothly behind the shel of your ear, making sure it didn’t move.
you stared at him.
the bathroom door kicked open and you both spilled back out into the club like nothing had happened, like you hadn’t just flipped the night sideways, and how from there it all blurred into one long, messy memory.
alfie getting weirdly fascinated by the hand dryer and announcing it was “actually mad how powerful these are.” jay immediately trying to fight a traffic cone outside and losing. joel insisting he could hear the music echoing inside his bones. you laughing so hard at absolutely nothing that alfie had to steady you by the elbow while telling everyone you were ‘just overwhelmed by the vibes.’ the strip feeling brighter and louder than usual, police sirens popping up somewhere that sent everyone running purely on instinct, you and alfie sprinting for half a street before realising no one was chasing you and crouching behind a shuttered shop crying with laughter. jay reappearing out of nowhere and asking if anyone had ‘seen his dignity.’ alfie buying water and pressing it into your hands every ten minutes like he’d decided it was his job to keep you alive. you remember sitting on a curb debating whether the moon looked fake tonight, or sharing crisps with strangers who told you they loved you, or alfie leaning in to tell you something important and then completely losing the thought halfway through which sent you both into hysterics.
you couldn’t stay off him. arms brushing stood next to each other; legs pressed together sat on the curb. his body was always close enough, the warmth never left. he’d been glued to you all night, and you, him. you both began to lose your friends when taking too long in the bathroom or down a quiet alleyway, each one breaking off throughout the night it felt as you were in and out of your handbag, combining packets, losing lip liners and dropping phones.
not that it affected either of you. your company was the only one that mattered, considering everyone else wasn’t on your upbeat level.
talking fast. moving faster. giggling loud. practically jumping in your steps, you were wide-eyed and ready for the night to be yours.
it was hard to stay still.
you watched a fight break out from the inside of a club, your arm tangled with alfie’s as your cheek hovered at his back, initially going to tell him something, and instead become fascinated by the sight in front of you. alfie was watching it too. even the bar tender making your drink was watching.
you broke out of it when, eventually, someone did try to break them up, and the smallest of strands from alfie’s cotton shirt brushed the tip of your nose, unaware of how close you were leaning into him.
you wanted to melt right into his bones.
especially when the girl next to him started sharing a giggle with him at the bar, and you can’t remember if you did pull her long, curled ponytail or just badly want to. you don’t remember having a long face, but you recall alfie turning around and backing you up as you refused to take so many steps away from him, seeing his lips pulled in that loud smirk, like he knew something was up as he carried both your glasses.
“what’s the matter?” he leaned down to speak in your ear.
“nothin’.”
“yeah there is.”
“there’s not,” your eyes shot to the side to look at him, faces so close, you could see individual hairs at the start of his eyebrows.
he tried to make you laugh, pressing his forehead to the side of your head like the rhino he was which made break instantly. his arm snuck around the front of you in a somewhat hug as he squeezed you tight, your body moulding perfectly against his.
whether it was the bass of the music and the multicoloured lights, the endless drinking, or the entire packet of whatever you’d bought rewiring your insides — your legs felt lighter, your arms looser, your heart racing at the same time it slowed down, and when you didn’t drop your hands from around alfie’s neck after pointing out some guy to the right, when you stayed there swaying with him instead - you started to realise how frighteningly in control and out of control you were of both your body and mind. how close he was, how warm and heavy his hands felt at your ribcage, how comfortable the position was for both of you.
your hand curled into the nape of his neck when a group of girls shoved past, teeth sinking into your tongue as he instinctively pulled you closer, close enough that you had to lift one leg slightly to make room for them to squeeze through. loud and squeaky, wedges stomping into the ground that they’d end up 6ft under if the brushed your baby toe.
he was fixed on your side profile, even with the scowl on your face that said you were two seconds away from punching someone, and he couldn’t look away when you turned back to him. he wanted to see every detail. the curl of your lashes. the softness of your skin, even the faint acne scars along your jaw that only made you more real to him. the tiny crease between your brows, the baby hairs by your ear - he kept dragging his eyes back to your mouth, only to get trapped again by the compelling masterpiece that were your eyes.
he loved seeing the many changes over the past week: in the sun, in the moonlight, under bright multicoloured lights or the reflection of water. he wished he could slam the colour in the palm of his hand and use it as his preference for all future belongings.
“we should go,” he said suddenly, voice low, almost careful.
“go where?”
he blinked like the answer was obvious. “home.”
you tilted your head, squinting at him, grin still pulling at your mouth. “why?”
“pool,” he added after a second. like it was the most natural next step in the world.
and it was.
it seemed like an amazing idea.
the strip was too loud, too bright, too crowded anyway — things were starting to annoy you, unless it was the steady pressure of his hand guiding you through bodies, unless it was the way he kept glancing back to make sure you were still there, still smiling, still upright, still with him.
it felt like you reached the apartment block in 2 seconds thanks to a speedy tuktuk, the giddiness kicking in when dropped mere meters from your complex. a new wave of thrill and excitement shot through you, lighting every nerves with a new reckless and exhilarating blaze. you kicked your heels off in the street, abandoned carelessly by a palm tree and bolted to the pool, bare foot, laughing while you ran, jumping in not five seconds before alfie did, sending a massive wave of a splash everywhere.
you surfaced spluttering, hair in your face, still laughing when you felt him reach for you underwater, lifting you up just to throw you under again in the deep end, and doing it over and over again until your stomach hurt with laughter, struggling to breathe.
he had the sense to quit, chuckling to himself as he reached for you to pull you back to the shallow end, inhabiting a surge of confidence to pull your your arm up over his shoulder, the other following in your own consciousness.
you looked like a drowned rat. you know you did. you sputtered more water, scraping your hair back, knowing your eyelashes were probably clumped together and your makeup beginning to wash off whether it was waterproof or not.
you laughed in his face when seeing his eyes dance over yours, knowing you probably looked scary.
you quickly fell to silence, chests rising heavily under the water, droplets falling from both your hair and lashes — alfie’s annoyingly looking longer and thicker than yours ever would, you couldn’t quit looking at them.
it was only when you realised you couldn’t move your body any physically closer that you noticed how tangled you actually were — both of your legs hooked loosely around his waist, just above his hips to keep while your your chest brushing his every time the water lifted you. his hands sat firm on your hips, holding you without daring drop lower.
the realisation hit all at once, sharp and dizzying, the laughter drying up in your throat as the air between you changed.
thick and sharp, suddenly very aware of itself.
alfie seemed to clock it at the exact same time.
his grip shifted slower. more deliberate. his eyes flicked down, then back up to your face, and something darkened there, something heated that made your stomach flip.
“do you actually hate me?”
his question catches you off guard.
your break your gaze off his lips and look at him in the eyes, pulling back ever so slightly, you place a hand on his shoulder with a confused look that always comes across passive-aggressive.
he continues. “i just feel like you hate me too much to . . .” his gaze falters, pulling his own confused gaze looking off behind your shoulder.
“to what?” you try to block his view.
“i dunno.”
you stare at him.
thirty seconds pass.
you cross your arms behind his neck. “whether i hate you or not, does that matter right now?”
he glances up.
your smile is loud.
“you’re gonna blame me for this in the morning.”
“i know.”
there was no time to waste.
with fingers curling into his wet hair, you dragged him down to meet you, lips crashing together hard enough that he made a sound you felt in your chest more than heard.
the water sloshed around you as he stumbled beneath the water, hands tightening like instinct had taken over, like he’d been waiting for permission he hadn’t realised he was holding his breath for. his hands dropped to your ass as you opened your mouth, allowing him full access as your tongues met each other for the first time.
you were starving for him. you couldn’t help but almost eat him, forcing your tongue to taste every inch of him. he couldn’t breathe, trying to keep up with your needy, eager pace.
“fuck,” he breathed against your mouth, and you laughed quick once, eyes still closed before kissing him again.
this one slower. deeper. even messier.
he moved you both until your back hit the pool wal, your teeth catching his lip by accident and he groaned: low, startled, pleased, pulling you impossibly closer in the water.
every nerve felt lit up, electrifying, the pool suddenly too small – too full of him.
your arms slipped from his hair to your skirt, thumbs tucking down the sides before tugging them down.
“wait-wait—wait,” alfie pulled away just enough so that your nose were still brushing. “ . . . i don’t think i can do this in a pool . .”
your brows furrowed instinctively.
the door to his apartment slammed against the wall as he carries you both in, kicking it closed as a trail of water soaked the floorboards in your steps.
he lifts you without warning — just hooks his arms under your thighs and hauls you up against him like you weigh nothing — and you gasp, instinctively clinging to him, legs locking around his waist as he stumbles toward the steps, still kissing you like he’s scared if he stops for even a second you’ll change your mind.
your mouths moved in sync, your body tingling every second you guys touch, an inexplainable feeling of warmth and familiarity consuming you despite this being your first time with one another. there’s relief the same time there is an aching amount of impatience.
his hands slide from your back to your ass to your hips where he grips you, hauling your against his, the ache is unbearable between your legs. your hands pull at his shirt before you guide his wrist in the direction of your soaked, see-through skirt. “alfie, please.”
he answers with what you want, peeling his heavy shirt off before throwing it to the side an pushing down your skirt along, his hand sliding into your wet thong not a second after.
a moan escapes you at the contact and alfie stutters a breath of air, like, he can’t believe this is happening. that he’s the one making you like this. “you ok?”
“yes, please, hurry up,” you whine, holding his wrist, the wall keeping you upright for now. you can’t even look at him in his shirtless state or you might combust.
you struggle to kiss him as his fingers stroke you at first, his palm covering your mound whole as he rubs you slow and torturously before sliding a finger between your lips.
your moan loudly, and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue back in your mouth, now taking control as you melt into him.
he’s fast to add another finger, pumping them into you slowly at first until you’re used to their intrusion, your nails digging into his bare shoulder blade. “oh my god, quick,” you beg, lips brushing his as he fastens his pace.
you don’t know if it’s the drugs that makes the experience of him fingering you so incredibly or if it’s just alfie in general, but you’re embarrassed by how good his fingers alone are. long and thick and familiar with what they’re doing, “fuck, i’m gonna come already,” you whisper pathetically, voice hoarse, your head dropping as he keeps going, his lips finding your jaw as he sucks and nips.
you remember coming hard, his fingers pumping in and out of you at an ungodly pace through it until you could feel your own release on your legs.
your mouth hung open, a string of breathless, whiney sounds leaving them as he slowed his moments until you gave his shoulder the smallest push, the pleasure teetering overstimulation, you needed a moment to collect yourself.
although it really was a moment, because in your bambi-like stance, your stumble towards him with your hands pulling at your top, peeling off with your bra unbuckling after. alfie stumbled back also, his eyes flying from your face to your tits: his mouth filled with saliva.
your hands gripped his face while his grabbed your thighs, hoisting you up on him with ease as you wrapped your legs around him.
you could feel how hard he was. how badly he wanted you. if his dick didn’t give it away, his actions did; large hands exploring your body, mouth attacking your own, legs tripping backwards as he couldn’t think straight. “fuck me.”
you remember your back on his bed, and him dropping his torso rolling on yours, careful not to crush you with his body weight. your fingernails traced his back, his sides and his stomach, feeling the muscle everywhere but you couldn’t leave his arms alone.
boxing you in, you gripped his biceps, waiting for him to shuffle his shorts off while waiting for him, legs spread, ready and eager.
you hated when he pulled his mouth away, chasing his lips every second they parted from yours.
even in your frenzied state, when both your eyes were blown and seeing things, you saw the attentiveness in his green and the hesitance when he paused above you, boxers off, cock standing proud in all it’s glory, surprising you — but not really.
you knew alfie was a big boy. you’d be more surprised if he had been any different.
“it’s ok,” you assured, eyes trained on him in his hand.
you were so wet, he slid right in with ease.
“aw fuck—alfie!” you cried out, feeling him inch in bit by bit. he was big. the stretch burned in a way you couldn’t breathe with how good it felt. you wanted to cry with pleasure, you hadn’t experienced anything like this. your hands gripped his hips, nail digging into them, ushering him to keep going.
“fuck,” he swore, watching himself slide into you. he was already light-headed, trying not to bust.
with a final push, you moaned, eyes screwed shut, mouth wide open, feeling every inch of him push into you, every vein stroking your walls before he quickly started to move: you felt like dynamite.
your whole body was tingling. buzzing. the overbearing thrill of him skin on skin with you sending every nerve, every hormone into its own little delightful party of fireworks.
the wet sound of skin slapping built on top, the feeling of alfie’s lips trailing down your neck to your chest sending your head spinning. you opened your eyes to watch him approach your breast, watching his tongue come out to lick your nipple before taking it in his warm mouth, sucking hardly and biting delicately, your back arched for more.
your arms locked around his neck as he moved his mouth to the other, sucking it into his hot, warm mouth while his hand palmed the left, squeezing hard while his hips continued to rock into you.
“—fuuuck, alfie,” your head hit the pillows as he came back up, mouth nudging your own.
“how are you real?” he spoke against your mouth, “it’s a sick joke,” he kissed you slow, capturing your lips with his own as his hands gripped your tits, the most beautiful set of tits he’d ever laid his eyes on; the softest skin he’d ever ran his hands across.
“faster,” your breathed, mouth falling open as your noses brushed together, your nails scraping down the dip of his back. alfie quickened his pace with a swear, pulling out a little further each time before rutting back into you; pussy clinging to him tighter and tighter each time he pulled away.
“fuck, i’m not gonna last,” he admitted, your hands falling as he rose to his knees.
you gasped as his hands grip your thighs and pull you down the bed, closer to him, legs risen in a way that allows him to hit at a deeper angle. “oh—FUCK!” you yelp as he begins to ram into you, your whole body jolting with each one of his heavy thrusts.
you never want it to end.
an hour passes. maybe two. you can’t remember.
all you know is that alfie is scarily skilled at least when it comes to you both as one, because your throat hurts with the noise coming from it all night, your legs burn from the positions they’ve been flipped in and the feeling between your legs — she hurts with a greedy satisfaction, yearning for more but knowing she can only take so much.
alfie makes you come at least three times as much as you can remember — with his fingers, with his dick, and with his mouth – which he told you he was ‘winging’ ‘cause he’d never done it before upon diving in.
you found that very hard to believe when your juices quite literally shot out of you, body wriggled with intensity, you’d never been so loud in your life in that moment.
you were spent. completely and utterly spent — to your utter dismay.
the bed was soaked. your hair was tatted. and sweat glistened your forehead. alfie’s muscles burned, sweat coated his back and abs, his hair messily sprawled across his forehead. he felt on cloud 9, nerves still dancing around with giddiness at its accomplice.
your bodies were miraculous together.
there was something about this particular match-up that would make others envious for what they didn’t know they lacked.
everything clicked. hips, hands, mouths, the rhythm you kept finding without speaking. every movement landed exactly where it was meant to, like neither of you had to adjust or second-guess or search for what the other wanted. like each move seemed to slot into place like muscle memory neither of you had learned yet.
it was fucking exhilarating. you didn’t know how to describe it as you lay there. it was the kind of fit that made your head spin, that made heat rush through you faster than your brain could keep up. messy and breathless and electric and just — perfect.
you knew you’d never experience anything like to again, and as sleep began to take over you, you wondered if it was the MDMA or ket or whatever that made you feel like that, or if it was just alfie.
you questioned it.
you tried to work out where the drugs ended and alfie began — told yourself it had to be the ket: the floaty warmth, the way everything felt unreal and too intense to trust.
but then he shifted in his sleep an pulled you closer without thinking - and your heart lept.
you waited for the regret.
for the panic.
for that familiar crash of what have i done?
but it never came . . which began to weird you out more even in your sleepy state.
however, in your safe state of security and comfort, you allowed yourself to drift, knowing there was no answers needed as of right now and no rush to run from it.
yourusername
liked by yourmum, alfiebuttle and 393 others
yourusername random selection cus i’m dead this morn 🫠 can’t believe it’s the last night, don’t want to go home 🧡🌅🪩 though i do miss my toastie machine xxx
Summary: The Sidemen play ‘Hit Send’ and Harry ends up texting a Tomlinson.
Pairing: harry lewis x yn tomlinson
“Hello and welcome back to the Sidemen play Hit Send!”. Simon introduced the video, the others celebrating around him as they all sat on the large beige sofa.
JJ began to explain the rules of the game. The player picks a letter and number card to select random contact in their phone. Each player submits a text message for the active player to send to that contact, but the ‘DM Don’ gets to choose which text to send with the aim to recieve a reply.
“I’ll be the Master first!”. Harry announces wanting to get his potential embarrassment out of the way.
There were a few comments made about Harry feeling brave, before Vikk gestured for Harry to pick his two cards.
Harry reached for the two stacks of cards that sat neatly on the wooden table in front of them. He picked two up quickly before looking at them with interest. “Okay, I’ve got T 9”.
“Do you have nine T contacts?”. Josh wondered, glancing at Harry who sat on his right.
Harry began to scroll through his contacts, preparing for who it may be.
“I fucking hope it’s a good one”. Ethan laughed as he watched Harry scroll through his phone.
As his eyes landed on the ninth contact under T in his contact list, Harry cringed out loud. “Oh I’m fucked!”.
“Who is it?!”. Ethan repeated.
“It’s gotta be a girl!”. Tobi assumed with a small chuckle.
“Well who is it?”. JJ asked with a smirk, already getting excited.
“I don’t know if I can even say”. Harry showed his phone to Josh to show the name of the person. “Can I say?”.
Josh’s eyes widened and a big grin filled his face. “Uhh…I mean..it’s up to you”.
“Just tell us, we can bleep the name out”. Simon encouraged, eager to know the mystery name.
All eyes were on Harry, waiting to know..
“To be fair, I don’t think she would actually care”. Harry said in thought. “But just incase bleep it out”.
“Tell us then!”. Vikk demanded.
“Please be kind with your cards”. Harry pleaded. “It’s YN Tomlinson”.
“WOOOOAAAAAH!”. JJ’s voice filled the room. “That’s mad!”.
“Fuck me Bog, how did you get her number?”. Ethan teased, already searching for a prompt.
Tobi glanced over at Josh. “We know how he got her number”. Hinting to their time at the festival.
“We could have fun with this one”. Simon stated whilst flicking through the cards in his hands.
Harry let out a nervous chuckle not knowing how this may end. “We haven’t spoken for ages, so this is going to be fucking random anyway”.
The others passed Tobi who was sat to the right of Harry their chosen texting prompts. “Okay, we have Playing a game, we rated you ____ out of 10”,
“Unless you say ten, I’m not fucking sending that one”. Harry was quick to defend making the others laugh.
“I do think that’s a believable one though”. JJ voiced.
“Next one, ____ said you’re into me. Is it true?”.
Harry cringed. JJ laughed. Josh smirked towards Harry.
“Ooooo!”. Simon exaggerated.
“Imagine she just replies with a simple no?”. Vikk brutally added.
“Imagine!”. Ethan teased. Already enjoying the game.
Tobi continued reading the cards. “Getting in the shower…😉”.
“That’s a good one, very bold”. Josh giggled.
“But if they haven’t spoken for a while, then surely she would think it’s a joke?”. Simon argued.
“Fair point”. Vikk agreed.
Tobi picked another card. “There’s a rumour going around about you”.
Harry shook his head. “She wouldn’t even care”.
“You would say that!”. JJ spoke.
“Nah I know what he means”. Ethan intervened. “He means another rumour don’t bother her considering how many there probably has been”.
“Yeah think about it JJ”. Tobi agreed.
JJ nodded. “Yeah, yeah, that’s true”.
“Oooo I like this one”. Tobi teased as he glanced at Harry with a smirk. The others waiting to hear. “You, me, drinks - Friday night?”.
“Oh fuck!”. Harry chucked nervously whilst covering his face with his hands.
“That’s the one!”. JJ voted.
“Bogs getting bold!”. Ethan cheered.
“This is the one”. Tobi announced. “Are you going to send it?”.
Harry winced slightly, nervous at the potential reply. “Yeah, yeah I’ll send it”.
Harry typed on his phone, nerves running through his body causing him to overthink the game massively.
“Sent!”. He smiled shyly.
As Tobi was about to choose his two cards, Harry felt his phone vibrate and glanced to see YN’s name tease him on the screen.
Ethan was quick to notice Harry’s shy smile. “Has she replied Bog?”.
“Tell us!”. Simon demanded.
“Let’s see!”. Josh peaked at Harry’s screen. “Wooow! She’s smooth”.
“What did she say?”. Tobi asked with a kind tone.
“Do you have a date?”. Simon teased.
Harry only shook his head with a conscious smile, trying not to show how excited but nervous he was.
Knowing Harry could get awkward, Josh spoke for him. “She said Drinks, huh… I guess I can pencil you in 😏”.
“She’s teasing you already!”. JJ’s projected laugh filled the room.
“She’s into you mate”. Simon teased.
“Gotta love a bit of flirty banter”. Ethan awed.
Josh asked what everyone was wondering. “Are you going to go?”.
“Yeah, yeah, course I am”. Harry avoided eye contact, feeling too awkward to look.
Speaking to the camera, Simon commented “Well would you look at that, Hit Send could potentially set you up on a date”.
content: (2.4k words), isaacwhy x f!reader, no use of y/n, established relationship, during discord vc in group house, oral (m recieving), exhibitionism, praise kink, manhandling, hair pulling, size difference, fingering, soft dom!isaac.
⸻ Dating Isaacwhy is like dating a golden retriever on steroids.
He's everything you could ever dream of; funny, caring, handsome, smart, et cetera, et cetera. But when he's with his chaotic group of friends? He becomes even more of a menace than he usually is.
Of course, you have no issues with that — in fact, you actually really like his friends and get along with them all pretty well. However, once he gets absorbed into something like recording a new video or playing some game with them, it has his entire attention.
And you? His poor, sweet, loving girlfriend? You're left unattended, staring at the back of his head as he concentrates on trying to kill another player, shouting at Nick for dying.
He's been playing for hours now, despite promising he wouldn't be on for too long so you could spend some quality time together. Clearly, time had gotten away from him.
You've been waiting so patiently, lazily sprawled out on his bed and scrolling mindlessly through your phone this entire time. Totally not fair!
That's it. You have had enough.
You huff, dropping your phone onto his nightstand and finally getting up, stretching your aching muscles.
He laughs, the sound loud and contagious, adding on to some bit that you weren't privy to. It makes you smile despite yourself, crossing the short distance towards his setup.
Your hand meets his big bicep, giving it a light squeeze and feeling the muscles twitch beneath your fingers. He turns, eyes meeting yours and bringing that ever so pretty smile to his lips — totally oblivious to the dull ache pooling in your gut.
He raises a brow, moving the side of his headphones off of one ear in silent question. You almost laugh, almost. Instead, you frown, giving him your best puppy dog eyes.
His smile falters, brows furrowing in confusion as he mouths 'are you okay?'. Oblivious.
You hum, fingers dancing across his skin before pulling away. You nudge his foot with your own and he shifts his chair back, legs spreading as he assumes you want to sit in his lap. You do, of course, but a different idea suddenly comes to mind.
You drop to your knees between his legs, shuffling backwards a little and planting your hands onto his thick, muscular thighs.
He pauses, eyes tracking your movements as he blinks down at you, mouth opening and closing before pressing into a thin line. There we go.
You watch the bob of his adam's apple as he undoubtedly swallows back a protest with rapt fascination, his eyes flitting between you underneath his desk, smiling up at him so sweetly, and the screen currently highlighting his sculptured features with a plethora of colours — the game still ongoing as his friend's call his name in confusion.
If you aren't careful, then they could figure out what's actually happening; just the thought of it sends a jolt straight to your core.
"My bad, got distracted." he says, sending you a look of faux annoyance, yet tucking his chair back in anyway.
Your smile only widens, delighted at the response you already knew he'd give. So very predictable. You could already see the outline of his half hard dick beneath his sweatpants.
He shifts his attention back to the game, though he isn't half as focused as he was before. How could he be when you were knelt between his thighs and trailing your hands up, fingers toying with the waistband of his pants? It's hardly his own fault that his hips twitch forward in barely concealed anticipation.
You dip your fingers beneath the fabric, bottom lip catching between your teeth as you trace the hard line of him through his boxers, pulling a huff of breath from him. He's big, not that you don't already know that, but the reminder always makes you a little flustered. He is a big man, after all.
"Yeah, I got one of 'em. Larry where are—" he grits his teeth, forcing himself not to groan as you palm him, a sly smirk crossing your tempting lips, "—you?"
The sight alone is enough to have your heart racing, heat coiling low in your abdomen.
You shift your hand to get a better angle, tracing the heat of his length through the fabric separating you with a torturous slowness, just to get him shifting on the spot and resisting the urge to buck into your touch.
Pulling your hand back, you instead grip the waistband of both his sweatpants and boxers, tugging the fabric down just enough so that his dick springs free, achingly hard, tip flushed and beading with precum.
His eyes briefly dart down, dick twitching at the sight of you practically ogling him — it's incredibly hard not to when he looks so god damn ethereal.
Tongue out, you kitten-lick at his tip, tasting the salty precum before licking a stripe down to the base and wringing a low grumble from his chest. A warning.
You do not heed it.
You press your lips to the hot, sensitive skin and kiss your way back up to the tip, taking it into your mouth and running your tongue over the slit.
"Jesus." he curses under his breath, eyes closing for a moment before snapping back open and shifting to his computer screen.
A grin tugs at your lips, parting them wider as you slowly take him further into the wet heat of your mouth. He shudders, exhaling shakily through his nose, hips twitching forwards unbridled.
"Two on me." he manages, a hand dropping to bundle up your hair and rest on the back of your head — encouraging.
You hum around him, hollowing out your cheeks as you take as much of him as you can until he's hitting the back of your throat and making you gag. You retreat back to just the tip, sucking at the head before sliding him back into your mouth, feeling the weight of him on your tongue.
He jolts, hand tightening on your hair and letting slip a too-loud grunt, forcing his hips to stay still.
"I hit my knee." he explains rather weakly when questioned, eyes dropping every few seconds to admire you slowly bobbing up and down on his dick, your hands coming up to wrap around the rest of him that you couldn't fit.
It was clear that your mouth was entirely too distracting, his gameplay suffering because of it and earning himself several annoyed shouts from his friends. You could hear Tanner on the floor above, complaining that he'd died because of Isaac.
"Don't blame me for your—shit—aim." he clears his throat, managing to play off the curse as you squeeze and tug your hands in time with your mouth.
You release him with a soft pop, catching your breath and flashing him a bright, teasing grin.
He doesn't grant you a reply. Instead, his hand presses more insistently against your head, urging you take his dick into your mouth again and pushing himself further inside than before, almost making you gag and him huff out another muttered curse.
You're struggling to take him, but he doesn't let up, no longer so passive as his hips buck up to chase the addictive wet heat of your oh, so willing mouth.
He grasps at your hair for something to cling to and tugs, pulling a muffled moan from your throat, the sound vibrating around him and making him groan.
"Hold— Hold on. Fuck. I spilt my drink all over my desk." he grits out, not waiting for an answer before muting his mic and carelessly tugging off his headphones.
"Needy fucking girl." he mutters, thrusting into your mouth and making you gag. "You just couldn't wait, could you? Needed my dick this bad, huh?"
You moan around him, throat stretching to accommodate all of him as he keeps your head in place, fisting your locks and rutting into your mouth.
"That’s it." he all but purrs, licking his lips. "C'mon, you can take it. I know you can— shit."
Tears prick at your glossy eyes, threatening to fall as your nose nudges the pubic hair at the base of his dick, jaw working to keep your mouth nice and wide for him.
"Attagirl. Taking me so well." he praises, "Fuck, so well."
His rhythm falters, thrusts growing sloppy and sounds growing louder as he approaches his release, murmuring your name like a prayer.
"Just like that, sweetheart. yeah— shit, so good."
Your core aches, throbbing at the erotic scene playing out, shuffling forwards to grind your clothed heat against his shoe in a lazy attempt at alleviating the hot, incessant need coiling tight inside you.
"Fuck!" he curses, head tilting back as he shoves his dick down your throat once more before coming undone.
His dick twitches on your tongue, once and then twice, cum coating the gummy walls of your mouth. You swallow his hot load, milking him dry as his grip slackens on your hair, running his fingers through the locks soothingly.
You pull back, releasing him from your mouth and coughing as you catch your breath, a string of saliva connecting your lips to his tip.
"God." he mumbles, shoulders slumping as he moves his hand from your hair to your cheek, wiping away a stray tear that had fallen. "You okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?"
"No, nothing that I didn't like." You shake your head, a smile gracing your lips.
"'Course." he huffs a laugh, tucking himself back into his pants, his big hands coming down to grip your waist as he leans forward and carefully hoists you up, situating you atop his lap.
"Pretty." he hums, thumbs caressing your waist in slow circles. "My pretty girl."
A lazy grin crosses his lips as your cheeks heat up, hands coming to rest on his shoulders. Your thighs are pressed either side his own, straddling his hips and making it frustratingly hard to get any real friction.
"Isaac..." You pout, glancing between his eyes and shuddering beneath the intensity behind them.
"So needy." he replies, "Patience." pressing his lips to your own and tasting himself on your tongue.
You sigh into the kiss, hands slipping into his curls as your lips slot together again and again, hot breaths shared between kisses. He hums against your mouth as you toy with his hair, trailing a hand down, over your navel, and dipping beneath the waistband of your pyjama shorts.
His fingers skim across the edge of your underwear, teasing as he smirks against your lips before cupping your heat through the fabric and making you jolt.
"Please, Isaac." You murmur, breaking the kiss.
He raises a brow. "Please, what?"
A groan of annoyance makes it way out of your throat, pressing your forehead to his and staring into his hypnotising eyes.
"Please touch me."
He hooks a finger beneath the fabric and tugs it to the side, running it through your slick with a satisfied hum.
"Isaac!" You gasp.
"Already so wet for me." he observes, spreading your folds with two fingers before thumbing at your clit in slow, punishing circles. "This what you wanted?"
"Yeah— yes." Your grip tightens on his locks, nodding quickly and profusely as you press down against him, seeking out his touch.
He marvels at the sight of you squirming on his lap, his fingers teasing at your entrance and slipping his middle finger inside, feeling your walls greedily clench around him.
"Oh— Fuck, Isaac." you whimper, tilting your head back as his lips press against your throat, kissing and sucking at the skin whilst slowly sliding his finger in and out, curling deliciously inside you.
"There she is." he murmurs, teeth grazing your neck and nipping at the flesh.
Your back arches as he adds another finger, stretching you out with practised precision, matching the pace with his thumb. His free hand slides up your spine, shirt riding up and splaying wide across your back.
"Faster, please." you whine, giving his curls a tug and pulling a groan from his throat.
He grins against your neck, "Yeah? You want me to fuck you with my fingers?" murmuring between open-mouthed kisses before pulling back to watch your expression twist in pleasure, his fingers gradually speeding up.
A moan tumbles from your lips, nodding at the words spoken so sweetly despite being downright sinful. "Uh-huh, so s'bad."
He adds a third finger, the stretch leaving you gasping for breath as one hand falls back to his shoulder, nails digging into the skin. His thick fingers work you expertly, sliding in and out of your cunt, curling knuckle-deep inside you and rubbing your clit faster in tight circles.
Your hips twitch and buck against him, brows pulling taut and cursing his name, the familiar knot in your abdomen tightening and tightening.
"Anything for you, sweetheart." he smiles, shutting you up with his lips and swallowing the pretty sounds you're making.
The kiss is messy, hot and desperate as you whine into his mouth and arch into his touch, his fingers fucking up into you just like he'd promised. It feels so inexplicably good that you can't even form a single coherent thought.
"C'mon, angel." he says against your lips, "You're close, aren't you? Fuck— Come all over my fingers for me." panting into your mouth as you nod dumbly in turn.
"Isaac—" you gasp, foreheads pressing together as your back arches and you clench around him, your orgasm wracking through your entire being.
"There we go." he hums, working you through your release until you're shaking from overstimulation, and he slides his fingers out of you. "You did s'good f'me."
Your chest rises and falls with shaky, uneven breaths, eyes zeroing in on his fingers coated in your juices. He stares right at you as he slides them into his mouth, groaning at the taste of you and licking his fingers clean like a man starved.
Some kind of sound escapes you, pulse jumping at the sight and your cheeks feeling far too warm. Jesus.
"Sweet." he says with a lopsided grin, breathing out a laugh when you lazily smack his chest.
"Isaiah! What is taking you so long?"
Tanner’s voice echoes through the house, shouting from the stairs, probably. You both freeze, looking between each other and then to his computer screen reading 'game over'.
"Give me a minute!" he shouts back, turning his head towards the door.
You smile despite yourself, slumping against him and resting your head on his shoulder with a non-commital hum. His hand slides further up your back to slip into your mussed up hair, smoothing over the strands and pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.
a/n: first post on this account kinda nervous... i had a dream about this and i just KNEW that i had to write it.. so. here it is!! i hope you liked it :,) — crossposted on ao3
i got this idea from a post by @smoshideasideasideas !!
summary you eat something you’re allergic to on eat it or yeet it and have the strangest reaction to the threat of anaphylaxis that the cast has seen. you talk about it on smosh mouth a week later, talking about how sweet your boyfriend was through it all.
warning talks of anaphylaxis and allergic reactions, swearing
gif cred belongs to @dutchesspotatoes
shayne sighed as he stared at the chocolate cookies in front of him. “this sucks. they both look like cookies.” you giggled nervously.
“worst problem ever,” courtney smiled behind him.
“i’m taking the more cookie-looking cookie,” shayne announced, grabbing the one farther from him. you grabbed the other. “sorry, y/n. cheers?” you both clinked the cookies together with cringes as everyone counted you down.
after taking a bite, shayne almost instantly gagged. you chewed with a furrowed brow as everyone laughed out.
“y/n, what’s going on over there?” garrett chuckled with confusion.
“yeah, what are you going through?” spencer laughed at your tormented expression, causing a few more laughs to erupt.
you looked over at him, still confused. “this is obviously the normal one, but there’s just something i’ve never tasted in here.” courtney snorted. you chuckled at yourself as you swallowed. “i don’t know.”
“this is absolutely disgusting,” shayne said after spitting the cookie into the ‘yeet’ and throwing the rest of it in the bucket, too. “i’m not even gonna let anyone else try it, that’s so horrible!” you all chuckled.
“shayne, that would because those chocolate chip looking things in your cookie is actually chocolate covered ground beef,” garrett announced. “with plenty of garlic and onion powder in the cookie to season.” shayne shook his head as he wiped his tongue with a napkin.
“that’s disgusting,” amanda declared with wide eyes.
“y/n, you just had a normal cookie,” garrett shrugged. “it was a chocolate cookie with chocolate chips, and i threw in some hazelnut to give it a nutella-like flavor.” everyone nodded as you froze.
“that sounds delicious,” angela moaned, amanda nodded in agreement.
“yeah, hindsight is 20/20 here,” shayne sighed, making everyone laugh again.
“y/n, are you okay back there?” emily called out. everyone’s gaze turned to you as you nodded slowly, gaze trained in front of you.
“okay, no one freak out,” you said, wiping your mouth with a napkin. you placed a hand on spencer’s arm, looking at him as you spoke quietly, “my epipen is in my top desk drawer, please go grab it for me.” after a surprised beat, he nodded and instantly ran off.
“what? what’s happening?” amanda said, eyes wide with sudden panic.
“i’m allergic to hazelnuts,” you said plainly, standing from your stool and placing your hands on the table. “so, i’m gonna go meet spencer and i have to go to the hospital after the epipen is administered.” everyone stared at you with dropped jaws and panicked expressions and stances.
“i am so sorry!” garrett gasped. “i had no clue, or i would’ve given a warning!” his hands covered his mouth as he shook his head. “that’s no excuse, i should’ve warned anyway. i’m so sorry.”
“it's alright, you had no idea,” you waved. you looked around at your castmates and directors. “this has been fun—i don’t wanna die on the smosh stage.” shayne laughed out in shock.
“yes! leave! right now!”
you waved before sprinting offstage.
they all stared after you in shock.
“like, what do we-“ courtney took a breath, looking to the producers. “do we keep going? what- what just happened?"
….
a week after the incident, you were worlds better than you were that day. after getting doted on by your loving friends and assuring them that you were alright, things were mostly back to normal in the smoffice.
your allergy was a complete surprise to the entire office, and you knew that. you weren't super active on social medias or super open about your personal life--it took over a year for them to even figure out you were crushing spencer before you two started dating (who always likes to tell people he knew all along, when he really didn't). it wasn't that you were uncomfortable sharing, it was simply that you didn't talk about yourself often. it wasn't a privacy or a shy thing, it was just.. you.
and so at the beginning of the week, amanda and shayne practically begged you to come onto smosh mouth and talk about yourself some more with them, for both the audience and for their sakes. you found you couldn't say no to them.
“y/n, let’s just talk about you for a second,” shayne said. you smiled as amanda clapped and cheered for you. you weren't even ten minutes into the podcast yet. “one of our newer cast members, you’ve been here for two years now..?”
“almost,” you smiled. "time flies when you're having fun they say."
“but tell us some things about you, y/n,” amanda smiled. “the fans have loved you since your first appearance, but you’re super private.” you shrugged. “like don't-even-have-tiktok-private." you giggled at that. "tell us some secrets that the fans don’t know.”
“well, i like long walks on the beach,” you sighed and they laughed. you smiled. “but for real..” you talked briefly about some of your interests and hobbies as shayne and amanda smiled and commentated. “oh, and i’m allergic to hazelnuts.”
“YES,” shayne spoke seriously. “oh my god, did we find that out in the most horrifying way possible.”
“i mean it when i say we were shitting bricks when you left that shoot, y/n,” amanda spoke with wide eyes as you giggled with slight embarrassment.
“let me say, everyone was so incredibly sweet,” you grinned. “like, you all checking in on me and making sure i was okay after the fact was so kind and i appreciated it so much. everyone showed so much care, garrett even brought me new cookies the next day with no hazelnuts.”
“yeah, ian also enacted the no-hazelnuts act of 2025,” amanda nodded, making you both laugh. “the kitchen has a new sign for it!”
you affirmed, “this is true.”
“so for those who don’t know,” shayne began, “the eat or yeet video has definitely aired by the time this will air, but there is a part where y/n and i drew the short straws to eat some cookies.” you nodded. “she ended up getting the normal one and i ate this absolutely disgusting meat cookie-”
“vile,” amanda agreed, shaking her head.
“absolutely,” shayne continued, “but y/n said she was tasting something.. weird?” he looked to you.
“yeah,” you sighed, smiling sheepishly. “i.. still don’t know what hazelnut tastes like, garrett said there was hazelnut in that cookie when he revealed it—all i had was, like, a burning sensation in my mouth at that point.” they laughed out in surprise, shayne offering a ‘wow’.
“i want you all to know, y/n had the calmest reaction to anaphylaxis i’ve ever seen in my life,” amanda declared, eyes still wide. “i don’t know if it made it into the video, i haven’t seen the edit, but after garrett said there was hazelnut she just, very calmly, turned to spencer next to her and told him where to get her epipen.” you laughed, cheeks burning at the memory.
“first, she told all of us not to freak out!” shayne added. “she said, ‘no one freak out!’, and then told us she had to go to the hospital.” you and amanda laughed. “like, i have never been around someone having an allergic reaction, but i expected more panic! more running, more urgency!”
you laughed again, hand covering your face for a moment before speaking, “yeah, that’s not my first time almost going into anaphylaxis. i just knew that if i had panicked, you all were going to panic, and that would’ve made it worse for me.” they nodded. "like, i may not have been able to get to hospital as quickly as i did."
“right.”
“but i want you all to know, spencer was the one who drove me, and he was freaking out the entire way,” you chuckled. “like, i stuck myself with the epipen, we got into his car and he’s, like, shaking.”
“oh, well, yeah!” amanda nodded. “that’s scary! your calm would’ve also freaked me out!” you laughed.
“i remember, i asked him if he was okay,” you smiled. “and he was like, ‘i-i’m okay, are you okay? that was- no, you’re not okay, we need to go.’” they laughed through your impression of spencer’s panic. “i felt so bad roping him into it, he was just the one sitting next to me in the shoot.”
“well, i bet- and we’ll have to cut this,” amanda said, looking to the producers. “i bet he was thankful he was the one who took you. if it had been my husband, or it had been courtney," she waved a hand to shayne, who nodded, "we would've wanted to be there with our partner."
you nodded, “oh, for sure. he would’ve just been pacing on set if he wasn’t pacing in the hospital. but he was so incredibly sweet, he stayed with me and was by my side as soon as i was treated. but he was infinitely more freaked out than i was.”
“but you’ve been through it before,” shayne offered.
“yeah, i have,” you nodded. “i knew how it goes and that i’d be fine as long as i got to the hospital, but spencer had never seen anything like that. he was so worried even after we left the hospital, he even offered to buy me a new epipen for my desk.” amanda ‘aww’ed. “which is sweet! but then i had to break the news that you have to have a prescription for that.” they both laughed. “but the thought was very sweet!”
“yeah, i don’t know if they kept the whole moment in or what, but there’s definitely a change from when you and spencer were there to when we pulled trevor and arasha out of the hallway to finish the video,” shayne chuckled. you laughed.
“i told them i didn’t mind if they kept it in,” you shrugged. you raised a fist. “hazelnut allergy awareness!” they laughed.
“so hazelnuts are spicy, you say? that’s the verdict?” shayne chuckled. you laughed again.
“all i know,” you said, gently dropping a hand to the table, “is that spencer agnew is sweeter than hazelnuts.” everyone ‘aww’ed. “and hotter, too.” they laughed out their surprise.
“okay, well, we do have the cut that.”
…
when you went to your boyfriend’s that night, you were smiling with the memories of talking about your experience on eat it or yeet it. though it had been scary, and you had been melting down on the inside, the care and love shown for you by your friends during and after the fact was sweet enough for you to almost forget the threatening aspect of it.
spencer greeted you with a kiss when he answered the door. “how was smosh mouth?” he asked as you kicked off your shoes. instead of answering, you just leaned in and pressed a longer, deeper kiss to his lips. he placed his hands on your waist before you pulled away. “wow. that good?”
you laughed. “we talked about my reaction on eat it or yeet it last week.” you shrugged as he gave you a half-grimace. “just got to talk about how great you were through it.”
“really?” he scoffed playfully, raising an eyebrow. “me freaking out worse than you were the entire time was great?” you giggled, placing a hand on his cheek.
“your care for me was wonderful,” you assured with a smile. “you were freaking out, but it was because you wanted to help and you wanted me to be okay. that was incredibly sweet, dear.”
“well, yeah,” he shrugged, cheeks going red at your sweet gushing. “who else is gonna bring me kickstarts and lose every board game?” you whacked his chest and pulled away from him before he could tighten his grasp. “i was kidding! joking! i meant, who else is gonna love me unconditionally and be so beautiful every day and tolerate me!”
summary: what your social media would look like if you were dating arthurtv
warnings/contents: sexual innuendos and jokes
author's note: powered through this one and feel like a beast 💪💪 also may be getting into my AB phase so watch out???
yourusername
liked by arthurtv, bambinobecky, and 23,083 others
yourusername when the pillow talk consists of random facts
view all 71 comments
arthurtv what a way to out me like that
↳ yourusername everyone knew, you’ve literally mentioned it on the podcast 😐
user1 that damn smirk
user2 i know that couch is good to nap on ‼️
bambinobecky that should be me 😕😔
↳ yourusername it really should xx
user3 give that man a wax
user4 couple goals ❤️
user5 are they interesting at least?
↳ yourusername very, got to learn about the great molasses flood of 1919
theburntchip when is it my turnnnn 😫
yourusername
liked by user2, arthurtv, and 60,748 others
yourusername this week recently xx going shopping, hanging out at the bach and arthur set and then having my phone stolen by a loser, and lunch with my best girl 😚
view all 91 comments
bambinobecky i know the comments are saying bach is bringing everyone but i have to disagree
↳ yourusername i’d only come for you 😏😏
↳ arthurtv absolute rubbish
user1 is that the thrift i see 🤨
↳ yourusername been thrifting since i was born mate
user2 isaac has to be goofy around and stealing everyone’s phones in his free time
↳ yourusername hide your phones around him, he’s a gremlin 🧌 poor liv has to live with him
↳ livvydimartino thoughts and prayers please guys 🙏
arthurtv leng
↳ yourusername always a gentleman
user3 your hair in the first pic ate
user4 dream blunt rotation y/n and becky
yourusername
liked by arthurtv, user3, and 30,476 others
yourusername sunburns & seashells with you 🐚☀️
view all 82 comments
arthurtv you made it look like both those glasses are mine 🙄
↳ yourusername that cause they were, you finished mine without asking me 😐
↳ livvydimartino what a gentleman. i would treat you better
↳ yourusername i know you would babe but i’m stuck 😭
↳ arthurtv italianbach come get your girlfriend
user1 not the boyfriends and girlfriends fighting
user2 good lord they’re so hot
italianbach slay queen 👸
user3 you better have kept those seashells 🐚🐚
↳ yourusername snuck them in my bra babe 😘
bambinobecky teach me your tanning ways queen 🙏
user4 where did you go?
arthurtv added to their story!
yourusername
liked by arthurtv, livvydimartino, 24,679 others
yourusername our version of date night 🍸🥢
view all 76 comments
user1 oh i KNOW you and arthur go hard at sudoku
↳ yourusername we’re too competitive 😔
↳ livvydimartino if you want to win pub quizzes, bring them
arthurtv gordon ramsey is calling me 📞
↳ italianbach to tell you to not cook ever again
user2 do you know piano as well?
↳ yourusername he’s (attempting to) teaching me
user3 cuties ❤️
user4 should have a double date with chippo and sabina
livvydimartino too cute ✨
yourusername
liked by arthurtv, user1, 25,354 others
yourusername back to jersey !!!! always wonderful visiting the TV family and hanging out with flora and posie ❤️ fun was had, sleepovers were reoccurring, and was soo sad to leave 😭
view all 73 comments
user1 so adorable
arthurtv mum keeps messaging me saying the girls want to facetime you
↳ yourusername name a time and place and i’ll be there
user2 outfits always slay
bambinobecky this makes me want to have kids with you 👧
↳ yourusername baby…. don’t tease like that 😝
user3 i love how close they are with each others families ❤️
user4 what my dream looks like 5 seconds before my alarm goes off:
okay so a fic idea for angry ginge (feel like people may have already asked for this) but reader is an actress and she’s in the jungle too and they have a lil romance. could do the first trial it’s ginge and reader (instead of ruby) ⭐️🎀
Get me out of here -Angry ginge
words: 1.8k+
warnings: comfort with a little bit of angst, feeling homesick (reader and ginge).
summary: after a ten days in the jungle and enduring your fair share of trials you were really missing home, a particularly hard trial left you exhausted and defeated but the boy you’d been crushing on comforts you when he sees you upset.
notes: thanks for the request lovely!🫶🏼 second request i based this on here! this isn’t accurate to the current timeline of i’m a celebrity, i just made it up as i went along. also added the part where ginge gets upset since as he said… men cry too❤️🩹. i hope you enjoy!!🤭🌴⭐️
You’re an actress. You’ve been in your fair share of movies alongside a popular tv show, though you don’t have any roles lined up until February so when you got asked to be on I’m a celebrity you just couldn’t say no.
The day you entered the jungle was something you'd never forget. You'd parachuted out of a helicopter and then been dropped straight into your first trial, that you'd managed to win, alongside Aitch, granting you a seat in the getaway car.
Ginge and Jack were the next two to get into the car. Aitch excitedly dapped Ginge up when they saw each other, as they're already mates on the outside.
That night the four of you ate steak, met the other camp mates and then slept in the comfy beds.
The next ten days consisted of constant hunger, gruesome trials, chores and lots of boredom.
Though throughout your time you'd made twelve new friends.
You and Ginge seemed to always gravitate towards each other, if you were sitting at the fire pit he'd always sit next to you, your beds were right across from each other and as you'd both been assigned the washing up duty you had loads of time to sit alone and chat.
You found him to be quite a comforting presence throughout this crazy experience.
——————————
One night you were going to collect water when you'd walked in on Morgan sat on a bench at the edge of camp.
When you realised he was crying and he looked up at you, not with embarrassment but relief, you silently sat next to him, not touching, just there.
"Don't know what I'd do without you in here," he had muttered, voice still a little crackly.
"Hm," you'd smiled, "I'm always here to talk if you need to Ginge. I know your mum and nan and whole family are so incredibly proud of you."
The both of you eventually stood and he pulled you into a warm hug.
"Ready to go back?" You'd asked.
He nodded and together you returned to camp, both feeling a little bit lighter.
——————————
This morning you woke up after what you assumed was only a few hours sleep.
Groggily, you peeked out of your sleeping bag to look over at Ginge, who was also still in bed.
"Morning," he muttered, voice horse.
You hummed and smiled in response, "mornin'."
"How'd you sleep?" He asked, turning on his side.
You sighed.
"Shit?"
"Shit," you confirmed.
——————————
After eventually getting up and ready for the day you ate some of the rice that one of the camp mates had put on before everyone had to sit around the fire to wait for Ant and Dec to come down.
As per usual Ginge sat next to you, smiling politely as he did so.
"Good morning!" Dec sang as the two men appeared before the group.
"Morning!" Everyone cheered at the same time, though none of you were particularly happy to see them since they were about to tell you who's facing today's trial.
As they list off each person and you wait for your name you anxiously twiddle your thumbs.
"Aitch... it's not you."
"Get in!" he muttered.
"Ginge... it might be you," Ant announced.
"Brilliant," he smiled sarcastically.
You were the last one, and you knew what that meant.
"So that means y/n, it might be you!"
"Oh god," you groaned.
Ginge's hand landed on your knee, silently comforting you.
"Alright, Ginge and y/n the public have decided the person they want to see face this trial is... y/n! We'll see you down at the trial clearing later today."
You put your head in your hands and cursed.
"You'll be fine, honestly," Ginge reassured you.
You nodded, taking a deep breath.
A trial is not what you needed today after not having much sleep and barely any dinner last night. Plus everyone's hungry so the pressure is on to get stars.
——————————
After getting ready Aitch and Ginge walked you to the bridge and waved you off.
You told yourself that everything was going to be fine as they took you to the trial clearing.
Once you finally got there you walked out to meet Ant and Dec and they told you about the trial you were going to be facing.
"You'll need to climb down into the chamber and crawl through different rooms to collect stars, and as I'm sure you know, you won't be alone in there," Ant explained.
"Yeah," you sighed, looking at the hole in the ground.
"Are you ready?" Dec asked.
You nodded. "I really just wanna get this over with."
——————————
The trial started with a room full of rats, which you could deal with, though the cockroaches and mealworms falling on you were making it harder—you got two stars.
Next was crocks, they were snapping at you as you tried to untie the stars from the rope they were attached to, thankfully though, you got another two stars.
Then you had snakes, in which you also managed to get the full two stars, though the hissing was really freaky.
"No!" You screeched when the door opened to the next room... spiders.
You squealed as you crawled forward into the webs. "Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god!"
Unfortunately you only got one of the stars in that room since it was taking too long and you didn't want to waste the little time you had.
Next, you crawled into a pool full of slime and fish guts, it stank and felt disgusting.
You couldn't find a single star in that room and you were quickly running out of time so you moved on.
Finally, you had to get into a pool filled with all sorts of water creatures.
"Shit," you cursed as you looked at the stars that were under the water.
"y/n you've got thirty seconds to get these last two stars!" Ant yelled.
You ducked down under the water and tried to unbolt the stars as quickly as possible.
Finally one came off and you rose to the surface before quickly putting it in your bag.
"Times up! Let's get you out of there!" Dec called.
Before you could even process what was happening the bottom of the pool opened and you slid down some sort of slide along with the water until you ended up outside, back where you'd began.
A little bewildered, you looked up at the boys before you.
They both laughed as you stood up to join them.
"That was insane," you huffed.
You counted the stars in your bag, "one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight."
You sighed.
"That's really good, eight out of twelve," Dec said after seeing how deflated you looked.
"I guess so. Everyone's just so hungry so I wanted to do a little bit better than that," you explained.
"Well, I'm sure they'll be really pleased with that," Ant reassured.
——————————
The boys were right, everyone was really happy with eight and clapped when you told them.
You'd just not had the best day and wanted to get the most amount of stars for everyone, which is why you felt so shitty about it.
——————————
Dinner came and was served hours later and thankfully the portions were sufficient enough for all of you.
Just as you finished eating Lisa and Shauna, who were sat next to you, started speaking about their families and how much they were missing them.
You kept your head down but after a minute you quickly put your bowl away and headed out of camp.
You didn't realise that Ginge had been watching you carefully all day, since he knew something was up, and you definitely didn't notice him getting up from his spot at the campfire to follow you.
Tears started rolling down your face as soon as you started walking down the path.
Once you were far enough away, Ginge jogged to catch up with you.
"Hey!"
You stopped.
"Hey, you okay?" He asked, grabbing your hand from behind so you'd face him.
You turned to him, cheeks wet.
His eyebrows furrowed worriedly, eyes searching your face.
"I'm fine, I just-" you choked on your words and he immediately pulled you into his chest.
You sobbed for a good minute before eventually calming down.
He smiled softly once you parted.
"I'm just so overwhelmed and the girls started talking about missing their families and it just set me off," you explained.
He brought his hands up to your cheeks to wipe your tears with his thumbs.
"I get it. Plus you had to do that shitty trial. It's totally normal to get upset y/n," he comforted you.
You smiled. "Thanks for letting me cry on your shirt."
He chuckled quietly. "Anytime."
——————————
Three months later...
After getting out of the jungle everyone remained in Australia for a few days and you spent the majority of your time with Ginge, just this time without any cameras.
But when you arrived home you both got busy and didn't see each other for a while, though you still messaged occasionally.
Then, out of the blue he texted you asking to meet up for dinner.
You live about forty five minutes away from each other so you met in the middle at a restaurant he'd picked and booked for the two of you.
For some reason your heart was racing when the uber dropped you off outside, which was weird since you hadn't once felt nervous about Ginge.
Maybe it was because this date was crossing the line from friends to... something else? ...maybe?
Once you said hi, hugged and sat down you fell right back into the kind of easy conversations and funny banter that you'd had in the jungle.
After eating, he insisted on paying before walking with you outside to call you an uber.
Ten minutes later the car pulled up and he opened the door.
You paused for a moment as you went to get in, his hand protectively on your back.
"Thanks for dinner. I had a great time."
He smiled, "yeah, me too."
You looked into each other's eyes for a moment longer before you leant forward to place a quick kiss to his lips.
He didn't let you get far as he pulled you back into him, the both of you sharing another kiss, though this time it was much deeper and more meaningful.
"I've been wanting to do that since the jungle," he admitted quietly.
You smirked. "Me too," you whispered into his ear.
He stepped back and let you finally get into the car.
"See you soon?" he asked.
You nodded before he shut the door and the driver drove off.
The next day a picture of the two of you kissing next to the taxi was plastered all over social media and the news, though it seemed the general response was that everyone "knew it was coming." and that "their chemistry in the jungle made it obvious."
After that night you and Morgan couldn't stay away from each other.
You're so thankful to the I'm a celeb jungle for all the amazing opportunities it'd given you but mainly for the amazing, funny, kind man it'd introduced you to.
"love, i'm home!" harry's voice echoed through the quiet of your shared flat. at the sound of his voice, you paused the rom-com playing halfheartedly on the television, the glow from the screen casting soft light across the living room. with a small smile, you got up and padded toward the hallway.
he was just kicking off his trainers, hair a hot mess and a face loaded with exhaustion—but the second he saw you, a tired smile broke across his face.
he stepped forward and pulled you into a warm embrace, tucking his face into the crook of your neck, breathing in the scent of your shampoo like it grounded him after a long day.
"theere's my girl," he murmured.
you hummed, your arms winding around his waist, fingers absentmindedly brushing the back of his blue hoodie. "long day, hm?"
"you don't even know. i'm absolutely knackered. filming was absolute shambles." harry let out a dramatic sigh.
"that bad?" you pulled back just enough to look at him.
"swear down," he nodded, expression serious. "i missed you lots. just wanted to go home and sit down with my missus."
"then let's do that, yeah?" you grinned, reaching up to push his hair out of his face.
harry smiled, the kind that made his eyes crinkle ever so slightly. “yeah… sounds bloody perfect, that.”
you led him to the living room, still warm from the soft glow of the television, the corny rom-com still playing in the background. he clocked it immediately.
"watching love actually again?" he smirked, plopping down onto the sofa with a groan.
"mate, you know it's my favourite." you defended, curling up next to him as he pulled you to his side, your limbs entangling.
harry slung an arm around your shoulder, bringing you impossibly close to him as he sunk into the cushions further. “you’ve got so many films to pick from and you go for hugh grant in a turtleneck. again.”
"okay, i'm literally just going to get up and leave," you deadpanned—though the amused glint in your eyes gave you away.
“oh—no, no, don’t leave! i’m sorry,” he said through small bursts of laughter.
you gave him an unimpressed look.
"love, if you get up right now, i'll cry. genuinely. actual tears." he pouted slightly.
you rolled your eyes, trying to mask the wide grin on your face. "you're so dramatic."
"you love me." he nudged you slightly, a teasing smile plastered on his face.
"unfortunately." you reply, your voice muffled due to your face being half-buried into his chest.
after a few minutes of the quiet he’d been aching for all day, harry shifted slightly, then gently lowered his head into your lap, letting out a soft sigh as your thighs cradled him like the safest place in the world.
“reckon i could fall asleep right here.” he mumbled, his eyes half-lidded. "the best place in the world, this. right 'ere."
your heart tugged at that. you brushed your fingers through his messy hair, a soft smile tugging at your lips. "sleep, haz." you leaned down, brushing a soft kiss to his temple.
he hummed, already halfway there. "i'm keeping you forever."
your heart fluttered. leaning down once more, you pressed a soft kiss to his forehead. you just couldn't help it, y'know? he was so pure. he was yours.
so, you whispered against his skin. "home's not a place, y'know? it's you, harry."
he didn't reply, already fast asleep. but the smile that tugged at his lips as he dreamt? that said everything.
